Today we got to stay home, with no errands to run. Technically, we should have done a dump run, but that can wait until things warm up a bit.
We actually reached a high of -19C/-2F, with a “real feel” of -15C/5F, which was nice for a change. Even when we did have wind chills of -25C/-13F, it was from a direction we were sheltered from. It was also bright and sunny, so we took advantage of it to run the house out the storm door window and do several loads of laundry. We didn’t get it all done before the hose had to be brought back in before it froze, even though we now do laundry using warm or hot water. We used to only do cold water washes, but this way, there’s less chance of the hose freezing. We are back under an extreme cold warning, and tomorrow the high will be lower than today, but it should be okay to run the hose out again for more laundry. We have extra bedding to do, after a cat threw up on my daughters bed. *sigh*
I caught a photo of this bunch, all huddled together, this morning, when it was still pretty brutal out there. The sun room was significantly warmer, but from what I could see on the critter cam, they weren’t really using it. When I first came out this morning, though, I found a bunch of them cuddled together in the cat cage, under the platform. The platform hides most of the cat cage from the camera’s view, so I never saw them in there. I would be able to see if they jump in and out of the opening, though.
As I was going in and out today, to make sure the hose from the laundry was fully drained, I saw a crowd of cats mashed together in the top of the isolation shelter. I couldn’t get close for a photo, though, as the more feral ones would panic and run out of the shelter. I’m also seeing several faces peering at me through the cat house window, so at least a few of them are using that to keep warm, too.
In between such mundane household tasks, I have been working to free up storage space here on the blog. I really don’t want to move to another platform, if I can avoid it, but we simply can’t afford WordPress’ prices for extra storage. After trying a number of things, I ended up simply deleting old posts. For a very long time, I was doing Photo of the Day posts, every day, as well as Critter of the Day posts – sometimes both in one day. A lot of these were just a single photo with a brief comment on them. Others had several photos or slideshows, also with brief comments.
A few of them were also full blog posts. Those ones, I kept. The rest, I have been slowly going through. WordPress made changes in their system since I last did this, that has made it easier for me to find the posts in the first place (you’d be amazed how many unrelated posts would show up when I used the search term “photo of the day”, which was part of the titles), and work with them. It’s also been easier to find the related images in the media tab. So I’ve been going through the list of posts, opening to view the posts, one at a time, so I wouldn’t lose track. Once the post was open, I’d open the image (or images) in another tab, so I could copy and past the file name from the URL. I had the media storage in another tab, and I’d do a search for the image. Then it was, delete the image, delete the post, close the extra tabs, then do it again.
It was a real trip through memory lane, doing this. These were mostly photos of deer and birds, but also yard cats. Some of them were adopted out, some are now indoors, and a few have either passed away, or have disappeared. While I have all of these images stored on external hard drives, I did end up saving a few onto my computer and sharing the memories with the family. Seeing old photos of tiny Dave and little Cheddar, snuggling with Fenrir – who was still bigger than them at the time – was rather heartwarming. David was not fluffy yet, and both of them are at least double Fenrir’s size now!
The frustrating thing about this is, I’d gone through these posts before, back when we first realized that posting full size, high resolution photos on the blog was not a good idea! I’d gone through and resized those huge images, or got rid of them entirely, depending on what sort of post they were in.
When it came to our photo of the day posts, though, had I started cropping and resizing all of them, even adding borders and the blog’s URL onto them. These images do not have large file sizes. That’s why I left them, even as I’d deleted others with much larger file size images. There are just so many of them!
Which means that I’ve deleted dozens of photos and old posts, and have only managed to get my storage to 98.4% full, instead of 99.2%. That 99.2% was more of an “accident”. Thanks to 53old’s suggestion, I found that WP’s photo editor now allows images to be scaled down. I could use that to resize the images, and could even see how much smaller the file size was, as a result. Very hand, quick and easy!
Yet, the percentage of used up storage space went up, not down!
It seems that WP changed this function at some point, from a one and done sort of thing, to being able to revert the image back to original size later on. Which means that, while the scaled down image might be faster loading when the page is opened, the full size file was still stored within the system. So instead of just resizing a photo, I was essentially turning one file into two files, with the full size file “hidden” from view, but still in the system – and taking up storage space.
I went back to the ones I’d scaled down this morning and reverted them to their original sized, and got back the space.
So in order to reclaim more storage space on this blog, I’m going to have to keep plugging away at these old posts. They don’t get any views anymore; I’m currently working on 2019, so they’re all older. But gosh, I put a lot of work into those images, and I was posting them because I wanted to share some really nice photos!
It’s awfully tedious, but still preferable to moving the entire blog to a new platform. I will still have to store new photos somewhere else, like on Instagram, to embed them into posts. Thanks to a suggestion, I might be able to store them somewhere else and embed them into my posts so that people not on Instagram won’t have problems seeing them. I’ll look into doing that later on, though, after I’ve freed up a bit more space here. I need to have at least a bit more wiggle room in there!
I guess that’s my project for the weekend. The temperatures will be dropping; the extreme cold warning is back and continuing for a couple more days. We don’t have any appointments until the 20th, and it’s supposed to start warming up again around the 18th, so that should work out. About the only thing we’ll need to go out for between now and then is to get the mail and make a trip into town for little things, like refilling our water jugs. Possibly a grocery shopping trip for my mother as well. No big trips to the city or anything like that until the end of the month.
Next winter, I want to really work on finding ways to NOT have a lot of appointments in January and February. There isn’t anything we can do about stuff like my mother suddenly going to the ER and staying in the hospital for 2 weeks, but we can try to book medical appointments – for humans or felines! – outside of the two coldest, most miserable months of the year!
Of course, I’ve been saying that pretty much since our first two winters out here, where we found ourselves actually unable to go anywhere at all, either because the vehicles froze, or we were snowed in.
It hasn’t really worked out that way but, for all my whining, at least the winters have not been as bad since then! There is at least that, and replacing the van with our current truck, to be thankful for!
I finally got around to editing and uploading a short unboxing video for the camera we now have in the sun room.
A few extra bits of feedback, since I recorded these clips.
Near the end of the video, you can see the camera moving around with the motion detection tracking. One of the major benefits of this camera is that I can set my phone up on a stand beside my keyboard, have the app open and keep continuous eye on the sun room. The old camera would only do that for a few minutes before I’d get a “continue?” request and, if I didn’t tap fast enough, it would discontinue the life feed. To have continuous live feed running, we would have to buy a subscription. That one difference makes the purchase well worth while.
The problem is, with so many cats moving around, the tracking would be all over the place, sometimes even sending the camera to do a complete rotation. Since the camera is mounted against a wall like it is, that meant getting views of the ceiling! It would move around so much that, even just in my peripheral vision, I was feeling almost motion sickness. The movement was just non stop!
So… the motion tracking got shut off.
I can move it around manually on my phone, though, to look at different parts of the room. Syndol noticed it moving and climbed up onto the shelf under the old kitchen window, standing as tall as he could, trying to get closer to the moving camera! He can’t reach it, but it was quite funny to adjust the camera so I could look directly at him while he was looking direction at the camera!
It has the ability to auto record. If it detects motion, it can start recording video automatically, saving it to the micro SD card. What I didn’t realize at first was that it was set to continuous record, which meant there were a series of 20 minute long video files saved to the micro SD card! With files that large, it takes forever for it to load to do a playback. It can be set for shorter times, but I’m not bothering with that. There’s simply too much movement in the sun room to have all these automatic functions running. As for files on the memory card, if the card is full, it simply discards the oldest files, while storing the newest ones. So if I had anything I wanted to keep, I’d have to make sure to download it. With the motion sensor off, however, there is nothing being recorded onto the card.
If I did see something I wanted to record, though, there are icons I can tap while the app is running, to get stills or video. There’s also the microphone icon that I can tap and hold to talk into the sun room – which rather alarmed the cats when I used it to break up a fight! All in all, there is quite a bit of functionality on there, most of which I have no reason to use, with it being a critter cam.
As for the network connect, there has been a couple of times where the network lost contact with the camera. Normally, I would have hit the reset button, but it’s too high to reach without a stool or household step ladder, so I just unplugged it and plugged it back in. That seems to have done the trick and now I seem to no longer be having that problem.
The only real downside is the tilt limit. The camera can turn 360°, but there’s only so far it can tilt. Which means that I can tilt it “down”, and get a great view of the wall and door under the camera, but I can only tilt it “up” far enough to see the very bottom of the doorway to outside. If I rotate the camera while it is at max tilt, the platform the cats use, or the bathroom window, can be seen, but they appear sideways. It cannot tilt enough to see the south facing windows, which is where the cats like to hang out. This is all because the camera is mounted sideways on the wall. If it were flat on its base, or even at an angle, it would be able to capture more in its field of view.
Oh, that reminds me; I noticed in the settings that the view can be flipped, if the camera is mounted upside down.
The field of view issue in regards to the tilt is not a camera issue, but a mounting issue for our space. If we could mount it level, it would work fine, but we don’t have a space where we could mount it in the sun room that would be work – and be out of reach of the cats! They’d be all over it, as soon as it started moving! So the few issues we’re seeing are not camera issues.
Which means that this camera passes the test. I can see getting more of these to monitor other indoor areas, such as the pumps in the basement. If we were to set one up to monitor the well pump and sump pump corner, I could see an issue with being able to plug it in; that power cable is awfully short, and there are not a lot of outlets down there! For the septic pump, I would want a type that screws into the light socket, and has a built in LED light. Which is what the first one I tried buying was, but we could never get it to connect to our Wi-Fi.
I would also want to have some outdoor ones to monitor the isolation shelter, for example, or other key areas in the inner yard – as long as we can access power! – but there is very little hurry on that. Mostly for budget reasons. Plus, I know my brother will want to set up security cameras around the outer yard, so I will probably leave most of that for him to do. He has something in mind, and I’m content to let him do it as he sees fit. My priority right now is more about being able to monitor the pumps in the old basement.
Overall, I would be okay with recommending this indoor camera.
No, I don’t mean moving off the farm. For all the issues we’re having, I hope to live here for many more years!
No, I mean this blog.
This blog is a very photo heavy blog. Early on, we ran out of media storage with the free WP account, so we forked over the dollars to pay for an upgraded account, with our domain name, that gave us 13gigs of storage.
Which did tide us over for a while, but we are at 98.9% full right now.
Some things, I’ve been posting on Instagram and embedding here. Which doesn’t always works, and sometimes requires people to click through to Instagram to see the images, and I think you need to have an account to see anything there. There are some things, however, that I won’t post on The Re-Farmer Instagram account – like our stock up shopping photos. I also upload photos to Word Press using my phone only, because it automatically compresses the images into a smaller file. Something it does not seem to do when I upload using my computer. Even images I’ve resized significantly are larger files than ones I upload from my phone.
A while back, I started going through old posts to try and free up storage space. I got rid of a lot of “photos of the day” and “critter of the day” posts that basically had a photo and little else. With others where the photos were relevant to the post, I checked and, if the files were full size, I would remove the original image, resize it, and repost it.
It was enough to tide us over for a while longer but it is incredibly tedious and time heavy to do it, and I don’t even know if I managed to get all the posts I could. I’ve been making pretty much daily posts – sometimes several a day – for years, so there is a lot to go through. I have to first open a post and check the images separately. If it’s a full size image, I then have to find it in the media storage area. Which you’d think would be easy, since I could just copy and past the file name into the search field, but it turns out that WP changes the file names somehow, adding _ in spots within the file name, for example. So I would have to figure out how to find the image using parts of the file name, instead. Once I found an image that I wanted to keep, I would then resize it, upload the new file, input the new image file into the old post, then delete the original, large file. Or, if it was a photo only post, I would simply find and delete the old image file, and then the original post.
There’s only so much of that I can do, before there’s nothing left to change, and it’s not saving enough storage space to be worth it anymore. I hate making posts without at least some sort of image in it (like this one!). Most of my posts are about things we are doing that I want to share. The whole point of this blog is to document what we are doing here.
So I’ve been trying to figure out alternatives. The plan I have with WP right now isn’t available anymore, so if I upgrade, there’s no going back. Their plans go from 6gb of storage space to 50gb of storage space, and the plan I have now gives me 13gb.
Upgrading, however, is to a business plan I don’t want or need, just to get some extra storage space. There is an option to buy storage space as an add on, but it would need to be paid for annually (though the prices lists are monthly), and the cost for 50gb is more than twice as the cost of the next plan up, which comes with the same amount of storage space. They’re basically charging more than a dollar a gig (Canadian $), whether you’re buying an extra 50, 100, 150 or more gb.
Which is ridiculous.
Alternatives include starting another free WP account and using it just for storage space and embedding the images into posts here. Which becomes a logistical nightmare (I already have trouble keeping track of my personal accounts and this blog’s accounts). I had opened a Flickr account and use that to store images to embed here, but they limit by the number of files, not storage space, so that didn’t take long to fill up. I haven’t found another place to store files that can be embedded here that I like.
Another alternative is to move to another blogging platform. Since I use a gmail account for this blog’s email, I would have access to a Blogger account already. As far as I know, I haven’t seen any limit on how many images can be stores on a free account, but for all its problems, I like the editing functions on WP better than Blogger.
I tested out Medium, but that isn’t so much a platform for blogging as a space for far left extremist hive minds.
I considered doing YouTube videos, instead, but 1) it takes a lot more time to edit and upload a video and 2) there are only so many things I would want to take video of, and I’m not the sort that can just talk into a camera. I prefer writing. Plus, I also would avoid anything that shows our faces. There are reasons this blog remains anonymous.
I ended up getting a personal Substack account some time ago, mostly because I wanted to follow other Substacks. I haven’t tried writing anything there, but I noticed that you can transfer entire blogs over fairly easily to the platform.
So here’s the thing.
This blog now has just over 900 subscribers, including email subscribers, after 7 years of blogging. I really don’t make any effort to promote this blog. Again, our need to remain anonymous prevents us from trying to create the next, great viral blog. 😄 WP does make it easy to follow other WP blogs – or at least it does, when it’s actually working.
I turned ads on in 2020 and only recently got enough ad revenue for an actual payout, and that amount doesn’t even cover the cost of the plan we’re on. Not that this blog can be used as an income generator (I cannot have an income, as it would negatively effect my husband’s disability payments), but it can be used to raise donations for the cats.
From what I’ve seen, Substack might be a good place to move to. For anyone already using it, can you tell me what the limits are for storage space on a free account? I can’t find any information for that at all. Of course, I’d have to pay to keep our domain name, but that shouldn’t be an issue.
Substack also has other options that seem to make it easier to collect donations for the kitties. Substack would take a cut, but since the account is otherwise free, that beats how much we’re paying per year for our WP plan. With WP, I’d have to upgrade plans to be able to use a donation widget, and we just can’t afford that. I have a Ko-fi account, but have never been able to get anything more than a donation button to work here, and I keep forgetting to post updates there.
If I do move to Substack, and you subscribe to this blog, would you follow us over?
For those using Substack now, how to you find it? How would you compare the two platforms?
Any and all feedback would be greatly appreciated!
I lost track of things and forgot that today was Valentine’s Day!
This morning, I had a 8am telephone appointment with my mother’s doctor. Normally, I would be outside, giving the cats their food and warm water. We were still under an ongoing extreme cold warning (which is now finally over), so I would have basically just taken care of the cats and skipped most of my morning rounds!
With the phone appointment, however, I messaged my daughters, asking if they could take care of the outside cats. I was pretty sure my older daughter had gone to bed after a night’s work, but I wasn’t sure if my younger daughter was available.
She was, and she took care of the outside cats for me, while I waited for the call.
Which was about half an hour late, of course. My daughter was back inside, updating me, when the phone rang. With the cats’ food trays and bowls so full of frozen kibble, we’re figuring out ways to make it so they can actually eat it. With the isolation shelter open again, I’m thinking of taking some of kibble from the kibble shelter and putting it in the isolation shelter. When there was just two cats, there was excess kibble, but once the other cats started going in there again, the bowl was empty, and even the kibble scattered about was eaten up!
As for the phone call, it wasn’t my mother’s doctor that called, but another doctor working with her. I explained about my mother having been in the hospital for a couple of weeks, and how we were told she needs to see a doctor every month to monitor her kidney function, now that she’s back on the water pills. They didn’t actually have everything in my mother’s file yet, and the doctor had to ask me when she had been discharged!
They did have the results of her last bloodwork done while she was in the hospital, though, and he could tell me her kidneys are doing just fine.
The problem, of course, is making a 93 yr old who struggles to walk, climb into the truck and drive to the clinic, over and over, because there are no local doctors available.
The hospital in her town does have a lab, though.
My mother won’t need to physically go to the clinic every month.
They will mail bloodwork requisition forms to my mother every month. The local hospital will not accept these forms being faxed to them. It would have been better if I could physically pick it up, to eliminate any risk of the form being lost in the mail, but that’s just not an option.
I will, however, be in that town next week, and will be stopping at the clinic to get my own medical files to take to my new doctor, before my daughter and I have our appointments. So he got a form printed out and it will be waiting for me when I get there. As my mother had bloodwork done this month, already, she won’t need to get it done again until next month.
Aside from that, she can have telephone appointments to go over the results, though they do that only if there is a problem. She won’t need to physically come in for an appointment unless there is a need. We will have to continue to monitor her for swelling and breathing issues, which the doctor at the hospital already explained to us, and my mother is to go to the ER right away, if problems start up again.
That done, I updated my siblings in our group chat, as much to make sure I wrote down the details while it was still fresh in my mind as to share it with family. Then I phoned my mother to update her.
As I started talking to her about the monthly appointments the hospital doctor said she needed, and that I called the clinic about them, my mother got somewhat agitated. It took a bit to figure it out, but she was under the impression she had a physical appointment with her doctor. I had told her I had made a phone appointment to talk about her case, but since then, she got it in her mind that this was an appointment with her, not about her. I clarified and told her, I’d made a phone appointment with me, that I had just gotten off the phone, and I was calling to let her know how it went.
She stayed very quiet as I went through the call which, in itself, is unusual. Normally, she interrupts and starts taking the conversation in other directions. I’m not completely sure how much she understood, but when I got to the part about going to the local hospital for monthly blood work, she said that we would have to keep track of that for her.
Which, of course, was already the plan!
She then started talking about her medications and the lock box. To make is short, my mother was very angry about having the lock box, the home care aids cant get into it, she doesn’t need this big box and can manage her own medications.
I was alarmed when she said the home care aids can’t get into it. She said she didn’t get her medications this morning. At first, she made it sound like it was because the aide couldn’t open it, but if that were true, I would have gotten a phone call. Or my brother would have. This happened only once, with one person, though. My mother had 2 other visits the day before, after the new lock box was brought over, and got her medications. Now she was saying the aids can’t get into the box at all?
I asked if she got her morning medications, and she said no.
No one showed up.
????
Again, if they were short staffed, I would have got a phone call, because I would have had to drive to my mother’s to give her her medications.
Then I noticed the time.
It wasn’t even 9am yet.
They are supposed to give her her medications before 7 an 9am.
I mentioned the time and said, they probably just haven’t made it yet.
Well, my mother was still quite angry. She can manage her own medications. They don’t always come at the same time. She doesn’t need this big box.
We talked for awhile and I reminded her, this was doctor’s orders. It was for her own safety.
Oh, so my children don’t trust me?
I brought up that she herself has noticed she is not remembering things. Then I brought up the pill boxes full of loose pills I’d found when I got her old bubble packs to take the the pharmacy, and that the pharmacist had to dispose of them. She has a history of messing with her medications, and things like that were why she needed a lock box and med assist from home care. This is for her safety.
I didn’t bring it up with my mother, but in the group chat with my siblings later, I mentioned that all these pills she had in there were pills she did not take when she should have. Plus, she ignored the days and times on the bubble packs, just staring from the top, and taking them whenever she had her breakfast, because she is supposed to take them with food (except I don’t think any of them actually specify to take with food). And by “with food”, she means with a couple of crackers or cookies or a piece of toast and, before we got the home care med assist, she would take them at 5am and 5pm and before bed, instead of the times on the bubble pack. As a result, she often had a couple of active bubble packs going at once, and really made things harder for the home care aids.
But all of that would have been too much to talk to her about. We basically just have to bring it down to “doctor’s orders” and “it’s for your safety.”
Our call got interrupted, though, by a knock at the door.
The home care aid had arrived to give her her morning medications.
My mother has no understanding of how much she is messing herself up.
After I got off the phone with my mother, I updated my siblings again. My mother’s behavior is a strong demonstration of just why having that lock box, and home care visits for her med assist, is so important. We were able to chat for a bit, wondering about how my mother will handle having a Life Line, once that gets set up.
It can be really hard to help my mother when she keeps trying to sabotage our efforts. These group chats and updates are extra important, because my mother will say one thing to me, then something different to each of my siblings, then tries to play us against each other. This is something she has done for pretty much as long as I can remember though, of course, as a child, I had no understanding of what she was doing.
Aside from the group chat, I got a Valentine’s Day message from my SIL, which is when I was reminded that that’s what today it.
Which got me to thinking about the whole theme of Valentine’s Day being about love, and about what it means to love someone. Years ago, I read a point someone very wise said.
Love is a verb.
Most of us think of love as a feeling. Something you “fall into”. An emotion.
Which all can be part of love but, in the end, love is not how we feel, but what we do.
The English language rather fails when it comes to the word love. There are too many definitions for one word. The Ancient Greeks had different words for love that I think we could not go wrong, bringing back. They also viewed their words for love on a sort of scale. There are nine modern and ancient words for love. Here are four ancient ones.
The first type of love – the basest form – is eros. Eros is physical love, and the root of our word, erotica. Eros is about sex, really. In English, it would probably be better translated as “lust”. Eros was considered the lowest form of love.
The next type of love is philia. This is platonic love. Yes, there is a physical aspect to it – hugs and kisses between friends that have zero sexual connotations – but philia is brotherly love. The love of deep friendship. Philia is used in many ways in our language. Philadelphia is known as the “city of brotherly love” based on the Greek definition. It is also found in the suffix -phile. One example being bibliophile, a lover of books.
The next type of love, higher on the scale, is storgê. This is what might be called, family love. It is particularly used to described married couples raising their children together.
The highest form of love, however is ágape. This is unconditional love. Sacrificial love. Agape is independent of any external factors. It is given wholly, and expects nothing in return. Agape is the foundation of Christianity; that Jesus set aside His godhood to live fully human; a sinless life we could not hope to achieve, take on the punishment for our sins we all deserve – all of us, throughout humanity, throughout time. An execution so horrific, a new word was invented to describe the pain. Excruciating. Ex crucio. From the cross. To die in our place, so that He could conquer death, that we may live. All we have to do is fully accept this gift of His, yet we have no obligation to do so. That is the height of agape love.
So what is love, in our daily lives?
Love is what we do.
Love is to be friends with someone, be apart for years, yet when reunited, it’s as if those years apart never happened.
Love is seeing each other at our best and at our worst, and still being there for each other.
Love is a couple growing old together, facing the world together, long after the tingles have faded.
Love is a parent denying a child something they want, in favour of something they need, even when the child has a blowout and says they hate us for it.
In one of my recent devotions, these verses from Luke 11 were included.
5Then Jesus said to them, “Suppose you have a friend, and you go to him at midnight and say, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves of bread; 6a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have no food to offer him.’ 7And suppose the one inside answers, ‘Don’t bother me. The door is already locked, and my children and I are in bed. I can’t get up and give you anything.’ 8I tell you, even though he will not get up and give you the bread because of friendship, yet because of your shameless audacity e he will surely get up and give you as much as you need.
While the devotion was about persistence in prayer, as both a parent and someone with a lifelong interest in how people lived in the past, this line stands out to me.
‘Don’t bother me. The door is already locked, and my children and I are in bed. I can’t get up and give you anything.’
In context for the time period, most likely the family was sleeping together on a mat woven of reeds or grasses. Even overnight visitors would join the pile. Can you just picture it? Husband and wife, lying on the floor, their kids snuggled up around or even on them. Dad there with a toddler on his chest and another child on each side, while Mom lies next to them with a babe at her breast… and then there’s a knock at the door! No wonder the response is “don’t bother me… I can’t get up…” !!
For most of human history, that’s how we slept. That’s how we lived. We had almost constant physical contact with each other. It wasn’t until the Victorian era that houses started to have rooms set aside just for sleeping, and that children got separate rooms to sleep in. Even now, in many places around the world, separate bedrooms (and sometimes just having beds) are a luxury, and the idea of children sleeping apart from their parents would be unheard of.
Sadly, we live in a world hungry for love. Real love.
We even hunger for the platonic physical aspects of love that used to be just part of our everything living, before cradles and cribs and separate beds and bedrooms became the norm, among other changes. Our culture has become so hungry for philia and storge, many turn to eros to fill the emptiness. We have reached a point when many cannot view any sort of physical affection as being anything but eros. A parent can’t even kiss their own child on the lips, or a mother breastfeed her baby, without people viewing it as something sexual in nature.
Our current culture, at least in our Western nations, has redefined love in other ways. To far too many, love means to always go along with what a person wants. To validate and enable anything they do, even if they are self harming in the process. It means to agree with anything they say, no matter how wrong they are. If you do not do this, you get accused of hate – another word that has been redefined dramatically!
Which brings me back to today.
Today, my mother was very angry about her medications being in a lock box. When told the reason why, she tried to turn it around and accuse us of not trusting her.
For some people, the “loving” thing would be to do what she wants. To make her “happy” by giving in. Take away the lock box, and let her take her meds whenever she thinks she should, or only the ones she thinks she should, even though she can’t remember what all of them are anymore, and certainly doesn’t know what the new ones are.
That would, of course, be wrong and even harmful. So the loving thing to do is NOT what she wants, but what is good for her, even if she can’t understand it and has hairy fits about it.
When it comes to my mother, I don’t “feel” love for her. I don’t know if I ever have. Years of confusing and abusive behaviour made that impossible. But she is my mother, and I still “do” love for her. She can get mad at me and yell at me and say cruel things to me, but I will still “do” love. Or she can flip like a switch and suddenly become oddly generous or kind, and I don’t know if it’s real, or if she’s trying to mess with me. It doesn’t matter. I will still “do” love. That doesn’t mean I’ll put up with the behavior, and I will call her out on it – which is also a way to “do” love.
I can make similar parallels to our home life, where my husband has to sleep in a hospital bed in another room. We may not be able to share a bed, but we can still “do” love.
Or where our daughters gave up so much to move out with us, turned the poorly insulated upstairs into their own apartment, and put up with freezing winters and boiling summers up there.
Or my younger daughter crawling out of a warm bed this morning, to go outside in freezing temperatures, to feed and water the cats while I wait for a phone call.
There are so many ways to “do” love.
This Valentine’s Day, I wish you much philia. I wish you storge and agape and even, if appropriate, a little bit of eros!
The -34C/-29F is bad enough, but a wind chill of -41C/-42F just kills it.
The next image in the slideshow above is how I feel right now.
I waited until past 8am to do the outside cat stuff. It only warmed up a couple of degrees, but even that makes a different. I also made sure to open the gate and run the truck for a while. When using the remote car starter, it shuts itself off after 15 minutes, which is very handy.
The sun room was much warmer, of course, but the wall thermometer was still reading -20C/-4F. That would be colder than the ambient temperature, given its location, but the rest of the room wouldn’t be all that much different. I’ve started to scatter kibble on their beds and the self warming blanket on the platform, as well as other areas they like to hang out, just so they don’t have to go far to eat. There is a ridiculous amount of kibble left in their various bowls and trays, but it’s frozen, so they avoid eating it.
My daughter and I were planning to stop at Walmart before going to the vet, so were quite early to get Fluffy into a carrier.
She did not cooperate.
My daughter had the carrier open at one of the sliding windows, while I was at the other. We keep a broom outside the main doors to sweep the sidewalks in summer, and I ended up using that to be able to reach her and try to push her towards the opening.
She did not cooperate.
The main thing was to make sure she didn’t jump down to the lower level, which she thankfully seemed to be trying to avoid all on her own. In the end, as she repeatedly jumped onto the hammock, next to the window I was at, I was able to reach in and grab her, and eventually pull her out. My daughter dashed over with the carrier, and we finally got her in.
It’s a very good thing I was wearing bite proof gloves, or I would have been bleeding all over the place!
We had put a small bowl with half a can of wet cat food in the carrier already, so my daughter quickly went to the truck while I put away the empty tin (The Grink got the other half of the tin to himself!) inside. I also made sure to set up the wind breaker box over the open ramp door. The Grink was free to leave, if he wanted, and other cats were free to go in.
That done, we were off, about half an hour earlier than originally planned. Which is fine. Better early, than late! We also made sure to leave the gate open when we left, as we had a prescription delivery coming later on.
Boy, did leaving early turn out to be the right thing.
When we got to the city the vet is in and parked at the Walmart, I went to get my purse…
That’s when I realized I never brought it with me. With all the fussing with the cat and getting things set up, I forgot to grab it when I went back inside to put away the empty cat food tin.
Not only had I just driven without my license, but I couldn’t buy anything and, if the vet bill was over the rescue’s budgeted amount, I wouldn’t be able to pay the balance. I would need to go home, but it’s an hour’s drive, and we wouldn’t be back in time for the appointment – not that we wanted to inflict that much more driving on an already stressed cat! My daughter had the carrier on her lap, and Fluffy was completely silent for the entire drive, huddled into the back of the carrier, right on top of her bowl of food.
So we drove to the vet. After going inside and explaining the situation, my daughter went in with Fluffy and stayed with her, while I headed home. My daughter messaged the family for me, to let them know what was going on. Once home, I just ran in, grabbed my purse, and left, pausing only to message the family to let them know I was leaving home again.
By the time I got back to the vet, Fluffy had been seen and they were back in the waiting room. Forgetting my purse added an extra 2 hours of driving time to my day! It probably cost us about $50 in gas, too. *sigh*
Fluffy was actually much calmer at the clinic, and they were able to handle her. They knew about the trouble we had to get her in and, if they needed to, they did have permission to sedate her, if necessary. Thankfully, they did not.
There were still signs of infection in her ear, so she got another injection of slow release antibiotic. The vet knew this was a yard cat, and was concerned that she would be let out to fend for herself in these extreme cold temperatures when we brought her home. My daughter reassured her, telling her about the isolation shelter, with its heat lamp, food bowl and heated water bowl, that all the cats would not have access to, the sun room set up, the kibble and water bowl shelters, and the heated cat house. Fluffy would have many places to stay warm and fed!
When I got there, my daughter left Fluffy with me while she used the facilities, giving me a chance to talk to the vet at the receptionists desk, too. The visit turned out to be under budget, which the Cat Lady will be happy about. The vet asked if we could watch for Fluffy scratching at her ear and stuff like that. We hadn’t even seen her doing that before her spay, but we’ll do our best.
Before going to the truck, I remembered to get a picture.
She was not at all happy to see me through the door of the carrier! Definitely holding a grudge. 😄
Once Fluffy and her carrier were settled on my daughter’s lap in the truck again, it was back to the Walmart – for real this time.
I got quite a few things, but my older daughter had sent funds for it, so it didn’t come out of budget, which was nice. I had to go to the customer service to take care of being charged for 8 instead of 6 items, which took only moments.
Once the shopping was done, I went to the McRaunchies in the Walmart to pick up lunch for my daughter and I to eat on the drive home. I was able to get a single burger patty for Fluffy, too, just as a treat, since she didn’t eat any of the wet cat food in the carrier with her. Their patties are 100% beef, so I knew it would be safe for her. I was rather shocked when I looked at the bill later and saw that a single 1/4 burger patty cost $2.10! Considering they packed it in a breakfast tray with lid, and even included a knife and fork, though, I guess we did get our money’s worth for it!
Once everything was put away in the truck, I cut up the burger patty and put it into the deeper lid of the tray, which my daughter put into the carrier with Fluffy.
She was not impressed.
Then, because my daughter was stuck holding the carrier, I helped her get set up with her lunch before we left.
Fluffy made no attempt to eat anything, though she did make her way to the door while we were driving, and try to get out. In the end, she jammed herself against the back end of the carrier and stayed there for the rest of the trip.
Once at home, I drove up to the house and my daughter took the carrier into the sun room before opening it. Then we unloaded the truck and she parked it, so I never saw how Fluffy behaved once she was free to leave the carrier. Later on, though, I looked out the bathroom window and found one cat half in the carrier, eating, while three or for more were prowling all around it!
When I came out later to do their evening food and water, I took the carrier into the house. While going to the various places to distribute the kibble and top up their water, I did see Fluffy, once. She was coming towards the cat house, saw me, then ran back to the storage house, to disappear under it.
She is most definitely still holding a grudge against me!
… Midnight has rediscovered the isolation shelter and was willing to go in long enough to eat.
I don’t think The Grink ever left.
I don’t think The Grink has any plans to leave!
Another cat had run out when I came close, but that fluff ball is the same one that had frost on his fur (my daughters think it’s a he). As I opened the windows to put in food or top up the water bowl, it didn’t leave that spot!
If you click through to the next photo, you’ll see that Midnight was replaced with a young tabby. I believe this is the one that was sick for a while, and we tended to him as best we could. If this is the same one, he is fully recovered, and even allows pets, while he is eating.
The three cats in this second photo are all about the same age.
So that is done! Thanks go my being a good and forgetting my purse, things didn’t quite go as planned, but I’m so glad my daughter was able to come with me. Her being able to stay at the clinic with Fluffy while I drove home and back was a huge help!
Meanwhile, I’ve updated the Cat Lady on how things went. She and her family were travelling today, so we were not able to connect at the vet clinic, as we usually do.
Tomorrow, I get to stay home. The only appointment I have is by telephone, with my mother’s doctor. We’re still under an ongoing extreme cold warning – the warning period has been adjusted again, and they are now saying the warning is until 7:18am. We’re supposed to drop to -32C/-25F around that time, and we’re still looking at wind chills in the -40C/F range.
Oooo… I’m just looking at my calendar. Since we have rescheduled my mother’s eye clinic appointment to next month, I don’t actually have anything scheduled for a week! I’m still likely to go out at some point. I’m sure my mother will need more groceries or something like that, but nothing that involved hours of driving! The long range forecast is still teasing with temperatures above freezing in the last week of February, which is when we’ll be doing our stock up shopping, working around another medical appointment for my daughter, this time in the town to the north of us. A good time to stock up on the 40 pound bags of kibble the cats like better!
I completely forgot. We’ve got a long weekend coming up. This coming month is a statutory holiday across Canada, but has different names in different provinces. Most have Family Day, but it’s also Islander Day (PEI), Louis Riel Day (Manitoba) and Nova Scotia Heritage Day (Nova Scotia…. of course). The Yukon has their Yukon Heritage Day the following Friday.
For us, it will be just another day.
Me, I just want to stay home until it gets warm again – and by “gets warm”, I’ll be happy with it just being on the warm side of -20C/-4F overnight!
Well, I’m certainly glad I got the truck in, even with the bitter cold!
As I write this, we are at -23C/-9F but it’s sunny enough that, instead of a wind chill, our “feels like” is -21C/-6F Which actually feels balmy, compared to this morning!
When I got home, I found this fluffball enjoying the sun.
I was actually able to pet this one, this morning. He (she?) was in a cat bed in the sun room, back towards me, so I snuck up and started giving shoulder rubs. S/he turned to look at me, but I think was just too cold to run away. There was frost on its face fur!
I can see why the vets would think our current crop of fluffy cats are Norwegian Forest Cats! We just thought of them as long haired tabbies.
Anyhow.
I headed out later than I normally would have – making sure to give the truck time to warm up! – as I wanted to go to the post office. The store it’s in closes at noon today, so if I didn’t pick it up this morning, it would have to wait until tomorrow, and we’re going to have a cat in the truck, tomorrow.
The store opens at 9 and drop off time at the garage was at 9:30. It typically takes half an hour to get to town, so I sent a quick message saying I might be late. Much to my surprise, I was actually 10 minutes early! No slow vehicles to get stuck behind, no road conditions to slow me down, it was a perfect drive in! I hadn’t realized how rare that is, considering what I’ve become used to, lately.
While dropping off the keys, we went over what was being done. He had me for fixing a slow leak, and I said the valve would need replacing. It’s been a long time since they checked the valves for leaks, plus my tires have been rotated since then, so he was going to check the whole tire, anyhow. I remembered to ask if he could check the oil level, too. It’s been so cold, I haven’t done it in a while. I was also down to have the passenger side windshield piper replaced. I forgot to tear off the loose bit, so the entire drive to town, I was hearing the flappityflappity sound of the loose piece hitting the truck in the wind. 😄
My plan had been to go to the motel next door, where there is a Chinese restaurant, to have breakfast and wait – it was only expected to be an hour – then pick up a few things at the grocery store after getting the truck back. Walking to the main doors of the hotel, however, I found the doors locked. It was still too early!
While the walk was only about a minute, maybe two, I was already feeling the cold, so I went across the street to the grocery store. There was no way I was going to walk into the downtown area to try and find someplace open I could stay at. I knew the closest one didn’t open until 10, anyhow.
I didn’t have much to pick up, but I took my time about it. The deli had hot breakfast sandwiches available, so I picked up a couple of those for breakfast. They were wrapped and the stickers had a price, but nothing about what kind they were. I thought they might be breakfast bagels, but they turned out to be sausage and egg on an English muffin. They were quite good, too. Just on the small side. 😁 A heartier breakfast would have been preferred, in this cold! I ended up eating in the grocery store vestibule, because there was nowhere else indoors available. I also ended up getting a couple of soft sided grocery bags, one insulated, one not, since all of mine where in the truck. I’d picked up another whole chicken for the freezer – they are still on sale, with even the heaviest chickens in the $10 range. According to my receipt, I saved $7.85 by weight. They still had the 5 count bags of avocados available and on sale. They were already down to $4.99, when they are usually around $7.99, but my loyalty card brought it down to $2.99. We still have some at home, so I only got one bag.
After taking my time to get everything, then taking my time to eat my breakfast sandwiches, I finally headed back to the garage across the street. It was already noticeably warmer by then, too. It was only a couple of degrees warmer, but enough to really feel the difference.
The truck hadn’t been taken in, yet. A delivery truck had come in, and the trailer was long enough to block both bay doors. They were done unloading, though. I went in to get my key, so I could put the groceries in the truck, but the mechanic already had it. He just to move a couple of small vehicles (including the most adorable import trucks; I believe they are common in Europe, but they are rare, here) out of the bay once the trailer was moved, then he could bring my truck in. That gave me time to put my bags in the truck. He’d asked me to start the engine for him if I could, but he was done before I was!
With the truck going in about half an hour late, that meant I still had an hour or so to kill. Not that I was in any hurry, but there just aren’t a lot of options for places to go and just hang out, in the winter. It was late enough that I knew the DQ would be open, and they were pretty close, so that’s where I went. I was their first order of the day, and still the only customer, by the time I left! Which was good for me; I got to miss the lunch crowd.
When I meandered my way back to the garage, I saw the company truck was gone, so it was just the mechanic. The truck’s tire was still off and waiting.
He confirmed that it was the valve that was leaking, however they found that the sensor’s battery was simply dead. Considering it would be 14 years old, that’s not too unexpected!
So I waited in their office for the owner to come back. I had two options for the fix. I could get the valve replaced with a valve and no sensor. That would be cheaper, but I would have the warning light on my console display all the time. Or I could get the valve and sensor replaced. Which is what I was budgeted for, anyhow.
He told me he’d checked all the tires, and got zero readings. None of the sensors are working anymore! I know at least one was working, last summer, as we got a low tire warning. That was what got us looking for the problem in the first place, and where we found that three out of four valves had slow leaks. Two were barely noticeable, while one – the one getting fixed today – was leaking more. He suggested we get the others replaced, as we can afford it, which is what I was already planning to do.
So the sensor got replaced and programmed. If you click through to the next image in the Instagram slide show, above, you’ll see our bill.
Oh! Instagram cut it off! I had set it to full size. Crud.
For all but the oil, the .99 was cut off the prices. I’m glad I got the wiper done here. It turns out he can get them at discounted prices. If I’d gone to Canadian Tire, which I might have been able to do tomorrow, the same blade would have cost closer to $50. He also topped up my oil with half a liter, which was nice. The synthetic oil for our truck is quite expensive, so paying for just half a liter is fine by me! The truck will be back next month for an oil change, after getting the engine cleaned and the oil sensor replaced. Hopefully, that will get all residual moisture out of the system, and we will no longer have issues with it.
Anyhow, the grand total came out to $149 and change. Lower than I had budgeted for, which is nice.
What was also nice was seeing that he didn’t charge me for labour!
That done, I just made a stop to fill the tank (I was just under 3/4 tank, and it cost almost $62 to fill, at $1.569/L), then headed home.
Along with the adorable fluffy baby in the first photo, I saw many other cats going in and out of the garage! That always makes me nervous, as I drive in.
It looks like I caught The Grink while he was winking!
The sunshine through those windows would be making it extra cozy in there. For all that there is a 250w heat lamp aimed towards the back, I’ve been finding frozen remains of wet cat food in their bowl! The bowl isn’t directly in front of the heat lamp, but it is right next to the bed they are in. Even the spoonful I put on the shelf above had been mostly frozen.
Gosh, I wish Fluffy would let us handle her! She needs pets. And hugs. And cuddles. So does The Grink! We haven’t even been able to touch her (or him), never mind check her incision.
Midnight was hanging around when I came by, but not close enough that I could see his shaved spot. 😄 It’s too bad he got out of the isolation shelter, but at least it was him, and not her. Neuters are far less of a concern. I was happy to see he still has his collar, too.
So the tire is now done, and the oil is topped up. We are good to go for tomorrow’s trip to the vet! The isolation shelter will be opened up again, and the other cats will be able to snuggle up in there again. Considering I regularly counted as many as 15 cats in the upper level at once, I’d say that might explain why I’m seeing so many cats in the rafters of the garage lately!
In other things, after I got home, I made sure to call the eye clinic in the city. My mother’s appointment was for next week, but she really balked at going. Which I totally understand. She is still recovering from her edema, so the more time she has on her water pills, before a long drive like this, the better. That got rescheduled to a month from now.
The weird thing was getting a call from home care. They wanted to confirm the lock box code, which surprised me. Did my mother not get her morning meds? Apparently she did, so… why confirm the code? The other concern was that my mother’s inhaler wasn’t in the box. My mother had brought the one from the hospital home in her purse, so it wasn’t with the bubble packs. The new inhaler, still in its box, probably was. We’re not as concerned about the inhaler as with my mother messing with her medications – the new lock box came in yesterday, so last night, my brother and his wife drove out to set it up for her. My mother tried to insist, she can manage her medications herself, but my brother just told her, doctor’s orders. In fact, if they had known she would be without a lock box when she got home, because the first one was too small for her bubble packs, they would not have discharged her.
The weird part was when the home care lady tried to confirm a code for a lock box I knew nothing about. When I expressed my confusion, she asked, isn’t there a lock box for the building?
Now, I know they have a lock box for the fire department/first responders, right at the main entrance, but a medical lock box for the building? I’ve never heard of one!
I did have to ask if my mother actually got her medications this morning, if there was doubt about the code on the new lock box. Now that I think about it, the lock box was set up before my mother’s last med assist of the day, so if there was an issue, it would have first happened last night, and I would have gotten a call then. As far as she could see from the files, my mother did get her medications. It was just the inhaler that was of concern, because it was not in the lock box. In the end, it was decided the inhaler would be kept in the lock box, too, just for consistency.
At least that is taken care of!
Meanwhile, I’m glad to be home and no longer having to drive anywhere until tomorrow. I was hearing weather reports on the radio while I was driving. The entire province is still under an ongoing extreme cold warning, with some places expecting wind chills of -43C/-45F – all well to the south of us, though. According to my weather app, our region’s cold warning is expected to end at 8:18pm this evening.
How strangely specific.
Our overnight lows are still expected to reach below -30C/-22F, so I’m guessing that means the wind chills in our area are no longer expected to reach the -40C/F range.
I probably sound like a broken record by now, but I am so done with winter right now.
We are still at our high of the day (-21C/-6F). At least the sun room thermometer was reading 0C/32F when I checked a little while ago. It may not be the most effective sun room, but it’s enough to have some decent passive solar heat, even on days like today!
*sigh*
Time to go feed and water the outside cats, before the temperature starts dropping again.
I just got back in from giving the outside cats their food and warm water. Then I headed to the garage to check on the truck and run it for a while. It was insanely cold. There is a meme that goes around saying, “the air hurts my face. Why do I live where the air hurts my face?”
That was me, this morning.
As soon as I got back in, I checked the temperatures.
-30C/-22F is bad enough on its own, but a wind chill of -39C/-38F? The wind is only 8kmh/5mph, too.
Yes, we are still under an ongoing extreme cold warning.
The sun hasn’t even risen yet, though at least it’s light out right now. This is actually the coldest we’ve been for the night. We’re supposed to get overnight lows of -33C/-27F at about 4am. It is expect to still be in the -30C/-22F range when we’ll be trying to get Fluffy into a carrier for her vet appointment. We are expected to have lows below -30C/-22F for the next 5 nights, even as the daytime highs start to warm up.
You know what? I think I’d put up with the spiders, snakes an alligators right now!
I really feel for the people that have to commute to the city right now. Thank God we don’t have to. Just the trip into down to take the truck to the garage is pushing it for me these days.
Just before I was able to take this picture, I watched as Freya slithered her way into the cat bed, on top of Beep Beep. They spend a lot of time, snuggled together in there!
Butterscotch being where she is on my bed is a big deal. She has expanded her range by about three feet to be there. Butterscotch, one of the originals, still refuses to leave my office/bedroom/craft room. In the mornings, I have to chase most of the cats out and close the door so she has a chance to use the litter. There have been times I’ve seen her go for it (she will only use the one under my computer table), and stopped what I was doing to stand guard. Out of nowhere, one of several cats will teleport from somewhere and start stalking, if not outright attacking, her when she tries to use the litter. Most of the time, though, she will stuff herself into the shelf above my pillow to snarl and growl at other cats, even if they’re just walking by some distance away and completely ignoring her.
Beep Beep, on the other hand, has no issues getting along with the other cats (except Butterscotch; they don’t like each other). She has become downright kittenish in her behaviour since moving indoors. You’d never know that she (and Butterscotch) is more than 10 years old. Probably closer to 15, but we just don’t know their exact ages.
Freya, on the other hand, showed up on our balcony in the city in 2010, and we estimate she was barely a year old at the time. She is really showing her age these days. We make sure there is softened kibble for her in a tray in my room. It’s easier for her to eat out of a shallow tray than a deeper bowl. Usually, the kibble is softened with plain water. When we do their afternoon cat soup, I make it extra thin and use it to soften the kibble for her, too. She spends most of her time in my room, these days, snuggled up and sleeping. At night, she will sometimes come over to cuddle with me, too. Every day that she is still with us is appreciated.
As I was outside this morning, doing the morning rounds after giving the outside cats their food and warm water, I was really thankful I don’t need to go anywhere today! There was almost no wind, but it was cold enough to be quite painful. The gate cam is having issues. It is fully exposed so, while it does get plenty of sun to both warm it up and power the solar charged batteries, it’s too cold for the batteries. While changing the memory card yesterday, the display would shut itself off almost immediately. Today, it stayed up long enough for me to read “low battery”. The solar batteries will charge up during the day, but the back up regular batteries were too frozen to take over powering the camera. I haven’t checked the files yet to see how much it manage to capture during the day. The sign game is more shade, as it’s under a tree, but it has enough to shelter it that the camera’s batteries didn’t completely freeze.
As I write this, we’re coming up on noon and have warmed up to -26C/-15F We don’t have a wind chill right now, but the region is under a several cold warning. Tonight’s low is expected to drop to -30C/-22F, but the wind chills are expected to drop it to -40C/F
Looking at the long range forecast, it seems we’ve got about another week of these temperatures before things start warming up a bit. By the end of February, we’re even supposed to get highs above freezing. I don’t hold much stock to that, though. It wasn’t all that long ago when the long range forecasts were saying we’d be warming up and even going above freezing right now.
My husband popped by earlier asking if I could go to the post office to pick up a parcel.
I told him we were at -27C/-17F.
He said, tomorrow, then. 😂
The down side is, I have to take the truck in to the garage tomorrow morning. I have a 9:30am drop off time. At the time I will need to start heading out, we are expected to still be at -29C/-20F Thankfully, the truck is in a garage and plugged in, but it’s still going to be wicked cold. There is no heat in the garage. I’m told there used to be a kerosene heater in there, for when my late brother was working on my parents’ vehicles, but that’s among the things that disappeared in the two years it was empty before we moved in.
Tomorrow we are finally getting that slow leak in the tire fixed. Hopefully, that will also get rid of the “service tire monitoring system” warning I get, every time I start the truck. Next month, we will take it in for the engine flush, sensor replacement and oil change, which should get rid of the check engine light and get our oil pressure gauge working again. I really wish we had to budget to do that first! As it is, I’ve just messaged to ask if they could replace one of our windshield wipers as well. I could do it myself, but wouldn’t be able to get a new blade for a while, and sure as heck don’t want to be figuring out how to replace it while standing on a stool to be able to see and reach, in the bitter cold!
Then, on Thursday, my daughter and I are taking Fluffy to the vet for a follow up appointment, though at least that appointment is for later in the day. This will be Fluffy’s last day in the isolation shelter, and we will be able to open it up to the other cats again. My daughter is coming with me so she can stay in the truck with the carrier while I go into the Walmart to take care of the overcharge from a couple weeks ago, and pick up a few things.
The daytime highs over the next while won’t be too bad, but the overnight lows are expected to be brutal, and last through most of the mornings.
For now, I’m going to enjoy staying at home. I’m not looking forward to more driving over the next couple of days! I’m really hoping things warm up faster. I have to take my mother to the eye clinic in the city on the 19th. It’s going to be hard enough on her without having to also deal with the cold!
I keep wanting to basically hibernate over January and February, and avoid going out as much as possible. Somehow, it just never seems to work out, but this year has got to be the worst for appointments and errands in a February since we have been living here! I’m just thankful we have the truck and that it handles the cold as well as it does. Our first couple of winters, we got hit with far worse temperatures and our van and my mother’s car froze.
I know it could be worse, but gosh, I’m getting really tired of winter.
Here we have David the Magnificent, formally known as F****d Up Dave, due to the eye problems he had that led to him being brought indoors. He is snuggling with Ghosty, curled up in his belly and using Mitsy. At least I think that’s Mitsy. Mitsy is using Clarence as a pillow.
Partially visible behind David is Tiny, The Beast, next to a small carboard box that is a favourite bed for many of the cats. Beside David’s head you can see part of Peanut Butter Cup.
What a bunch!
I didn’t get any pictures of the outside cats this morning. I headed out earlier than usual – it was just starting to get light – to tend to the outside cats and do my morning rounds. Once those were done, I messaged with my SIL, then headed out to my mother’s town to meet her. We were early enough that when we drove to the pharmacy, we had to wait a few minutes for the doors to open.
I was afraid I would be too early, but my mother’s updated bubble packs were ready and waiting. Once we saw the packs, we knew without a doubt that they would never fit into the lock box! Especially not 4 week’s worth.
From there, we head to the the hospital in the town nearer to our place. When we got there, we found my mother was all dressed and ready. We gathered up her stuff, including a lovely orchid and succulent pairing she got as a gift. My SIL took everything to her car and was going to move it closer to the doors, while I went to the nurse’s desk.
One of the staff came back to my mother’s room with me and we went over the paperwork. One page was ensuring that my mother’s stuff was accounted for, including that I’d already taken her old bubble packs, earlier. We went over her prescriptions list that was faxed to the pharmacy, with special attention to the new or changed medications. There were notes about my mother needing to have monthly follow ups with her doctor to monitor her kidney function, now that she’s back on water pills, and with the person in home care to keep in touch, in regards to supportive living.
This was all stuff for us to keep. Normally, it would go to my mother’s but she isn’t able to read or understand most of it. I took them home with me, and made sure to get photos of each page to send to my brother, just like I got a photo of the medication list in my mother’s bubble packs and sent it to him, after we picked them up. This way, we will all have at least digital copies of everything.
Once going over the paperwork was done, it was time to head out. We took it slow, and my mother had to stop to rest a few times. When we got to the lobby near the doors and gift shop, she stopped to rest longer in one of the comfortable arm chairs.
My mother says she is feeling a lot better now, which tells me she was feeling really bad the day she went into emergency! The last time I saw her, after doing some grocery shopping for her, she was not having as hard a time as she was, just today, after 2 weeks of hospital care!
She did have an easier time getting into the car than when I last drove her somewhere, while using my brother and SIL’s other car. She needed a stool to get in, that time. I’d brought it along today, just in case, but she was able to manage without it.
From there, it was straight to her apartment. The spot I usually park at, by a sidewalk to a door closer to her apartment, was blocked by a fire inspection vehicle, so we had to stop at the loading zone near the main doors. I had found a notification under her door during one of the times I checked on her place, about the annual fire and safety inspection. The date range was from the 6th and the 10th, but I had no way of knowing if they’d done her building yet. Seeing the truck, it seemed we got my mother home, just in time to miss it!
I went with my mother into the building while my SIL moved the car out of the loading zone, so she could bring everything in after parking. Some of my mother’s neighbours were in the common room, and they were quite happy to see my mother coming home. My mother also got introduced to the new building manager. After confirming which apartment was hers, he said they had just finished doing the inspection there. I don’t think she quite heard him, though, which is good, because she would have gotten quite angry. She is still convinced the exterminator guy stole a jar of change and dug through her boxes of papers to steal 80 year old passports. She now thinks anyone that goes into her apartment – whether it’s the exterminator, or safety inspectors, or any other official entrance – is there to go through her stuff and steal things.
After a brief conversation, we continued to her apartment, and my SIL caught up to us soon after.
Once my mother was settled comfortably into her chair, we went through some stuff with her. She wondered what the lock box was and we explained it, but my SIL took it with her. They should be able to return it. The new, larger one will arrive in a couple of days. So my mother’s medications will not be locked up until then. They’ve been left in the pharmacy bag and my mother is under strict instructions to leave them, and only home care can touch them.
Oh! I almost forgot.
While I was walking around the yard, doing my rounds this morning, I got a phone call. (It seems my “new” phone is much, much better and getting phone signals than my old phone!)
It was home care, letting me know that they did not have someone available for my mother’s morning medical assist today.
…
I said, that’s good, because she’s still in the hospital.
I did confirm that she would be getting her usual visits for her evening and before bed pills.
While it worked out today, I’m rather displeased. This was her first day back on home care visits, and they were already calling me about not having anyone to do a it! Her morning assist now included getting dressed and emptying her commode, too, not just her med assist.
This is a real potential problem. I live the closest, but it still takes me about a half hour to get to my mother’s, if I am able to leave right away. If we have a situation like a few weeks back, where all home care is cancelled because of a storm, it would be too dangerous for me to do the drive. Since my mother’s medications will now have to be in a lock box, she can’t even take them herself (which she shouldn’t be, due to her habit of messing with her prescriptions). It’s not like we live in the same town and I’m just blocks away!
My SIL and I were talking about this while waiting for the pharmacy to open, and agree that this could become a real issue. They’ve called me quite a few times since she’s been on med assist, letting me know that no one could make it.
We’ll do the best we can to manage things, but it’s just one more thing to stress how badly we need to get my mother into supportive living!
I went through the cupboards and fridge to show her what what my brother and SIL had picked up for her, and where they were. She asked about Meals on Wheels, as they would normally come on Mondays. I told her they would not be coming today, as I didn’t know what time we’d be getting her home, so I would be calling them later to get it started for Wednesday.
My mother told us she hadn’t had her lunch yet (which we knew, since discharge time is an hour before lunches are served at the hospital), and we assured her, we would take care of that.
Once we got everything worked out and organized, my SIL gathered up the lock box and I went out with her to her car, transferring stuff to my own vehicle that I would be taking home, before we said our good byes.
That done, I went back inside and made a lunch for my mother. Once that was ready and she was starting to eat, I said my good byes and headed home. I had lots of phone calls to make!
The home care coordinator is now aware of the situation with the lock box. I’d already called her this morning to give them the combination. The new one will have the same combination.
I had to call the clinic at the hospital near my mother’s place. She was wanting to change doctors to the local clinic, and seemed to think that the nurse practitioner that saw her was now her primary caregiver.
He isn’t.
In fact, while talking to the receptionist, she told me there’s even a note saying that he can’t see her as a patient, because she already has a family doctor.
The one my mother doesn’t want to see, because she’s female, black and has a strong accent.
So I had to call the clinic in the town that’s about half way between my mother’s town and the city. I explained things to the receptionist there a bit, and suggested a telephone appointment with my mother’s doctor might be more efficient. She agreed. I now have a phone appointment for this Friday. Her doctor should have all the files, notes and test results sent to her by now, but she wouldn’t have any reason to look at them, yet.
The receptionist I spoke to also does home care, privately, so when I mentioned my concerns about getting my mother to monthly appointments, and that I wasn’t happy she was sent home from the hospital, she totally understood. There are so few supportive living places, and they all have long waiting lists.
While I was at it, I asked about getting my own files transferred. I had the same doctor as my mother, as an interim doctor, after our regular doctor moved to another clinic. Now that the doctor my daughter is seeing has accepted me as a new patient, I have to get my files transferred.
I can show up at the clinic at any time they’re open, with $35 cash or check. They’ll print out my files, and I would deliver them to my new doctor’s clinic myself.
This province’s system is so antiquated.
Once I was done with that call, I called my new doctor’s clinic. I need to talk to her about my prescription pain killers. After explaining things to the receptionist, she was able to book me in right after my daughter’s appointment, next week. The appointments are in the afternoon, so if we leave early, we can go to my old clinic, get my files, then take them to the new clinic before our appointments.
After I was done all the phone calls, I updated my siblings, and then called my mother to update her. I had to explain about her doctor situation. She wasn’t happy. In her mind, the doctor that is at the clinic in the hospital next to her place should take her as a patient, just because she wants him to – even though she claims that “everyone” doesn’t like this doctor. They should get rid of that doctor and get a new one. She doesn’t understand that there’s only so many patients a doctor can take on, and that if they got rid of this one, a new doctor would just be taking on the other doctor’s patients, not taking in new ones. That clinic needs more doctors, and there just aren’t any. All the rural clinics need more doctors, but even among the doctors we have, few want to live and work in the boonies.
What I’m hoping is that, since my mother needs to have bloodwork done to monitor her kidney function every month, her doctor can send her a requisition and my mother can get it done in the lab, locally. She’d still need to make the trip to see the doctor in person, but hopefully not every month!
Hopefully, this won’t be for very long, and a space for supportive living will be found. We’ve already stressed with my mother to take any space that comes up, even if it’s in one of the towns she doesn’t want to live in. She just needs to get into the system as soon as possible. Once she’s in, it will be easier to get her transferred to where she would prefer – though where she would prefer is long term care, not supportive living!
It’s not very often they have someone who actually wants to be in a nursing home!
Well, it is what it is.
For now, my mother is home. We just need to go from there!
Today, I wanted to make sure the morning rounds were done in good time. The outside kitties were happy to get their breakfast; I think I counted 30 this morning.
Slick is the tabby in the above photo. Aka: Octomom. She had a litter of 8, a couple of years ago. Two of them, Soot Sprite and Tiny (The Beast), we have indoors, and the Cat Lady has The Wolfman. Slick is one of the more feral cats The white and grey in the photo is fixed; you can just make out where his collar is. He was just checking out what the fuss was! The black and white is Hypotenose. We could only get two males done at one trip, and Stinky – the grey and white – is one of the dudes we were able to get into a carrier that time.
*sigh*
This is so, so early for them to go into heat. I’d hope to be able to start trapping them before that would happen. We have no way to monitor a trap, so we have to wait until it’s warmer.
Crud.
Hopefully, next month, we’ll be able to bring more ladies in to the vet. The rescue has been able to help us with two at a time – we are not the only ones they are helping with spays and neuters, and donations are still slim.
Well, we do the best we can.
Once the morning rounds were done, I was able to heat out early to my mother’s apartment. The plan was to meet my brother and SIL there this afternoon, but I remembered that the pharmacy in her town opens at noon on Sundays. I hoped to be able to bring in my mother’s old bubble packs and, if all went well, bring her new ones home. If it was going to be today, I would expect them to need at least an hour to get it done.
So I timed things to I would arrive at my mother just before the pharmacy would open. I had her bubble pack that she brought with her to the hospital, plus there was an almost empty one in the home care folder. There should have been a partial one in her cupboard that she was supposed to set aside when one of her doses was changed. I was already supposed to take that to the pharmacy, so they could repack the ones that did not get changed.
I never found that one. I think she used it up, anyhow. I’m not sure the home care aids would have known they were supposed to go straight to the new refills. I did find another partial bubble pack with a supplement for her eyes that had to be packed separately until the pharmacy got an official prescription for it, so I grabbed that.
Then I noticed a weekly pill case and checked it out.
Oh, dear.
THIS is why my mother is on med assist.
And why her medications will be going into a lock box.
I think I know what happened – or at least part of what happened.
Some time ago, the pharmacy had to change suppliers for one of her medications. The pill was a slightly different shade of the same colour. My mother decided that meant the pharmacy had changed her prescription. She stopped taking it for a while before we found out. The same thing happened with the split pill. For the longest time, they would split a particular pill for her, but they were eventually able to get it in the exact dose she needed, so they no longer had to split a pill. My mother thought that meant she was getting a higher dose.
When we found out she was taking her pills out of her bubble packs and picking and choosing which ones to take, because she thought her prescriptions had been changed by the pharmacy, we were eventually able to get her on med assist. Given just how many pills are in these containers, though, I am now wondering just how far back these go, or if she is still doing it. She complains that the home care aids don’t come to her place at the right times (meaning, when she is up and having her meals), so she’s been taking them before they arrive. She’s also been telling them not to come in the evenings and just set her before bed pills aside for her to take when she is ready, because she “doesn’t want to bother them”.
Well, that’s not going to be an option anymore.
More on that later.
I grabbed the containers of loose pills and brought them along, too.
When I got there, I was able to talk to the head pharmacist, who was the only person working the pharmacy today. I first confirmed that they got my mother’s updated prescriptions, which they did. He brought over several pages to go over with me! Most have stayed the same, so there wasn’t much to talk about with those, but he had two prescriptions for inhalers. Thankfully, I’d seen the inhaler the hospital had given her to use. He had two types, and she had a prescription for both. One, she’d gotten while she was at home, but hadn’t used it for quite some time before one of the home care aids was able to explain to her how to use it. The hospital doesn’t use that type, so they prescribed the type they did use.
We decided to go with the hospital one, as it will be easier for her to take. Whether or not she should even be on it anymore is questionable, since it turned out she had pulmonary edema, not asthma.
Something to talk about another time. She has only 4 weeks prescribed. I will have to get her to her primary caregiver (since she went ahead and tried to change doctors) soon, and she will have to have monthly appointments.
During the doctor’s visit, that came up. It seems there was an “administrative error” when her kidney function started to fail, then recovered so quickly after she was taken off the water pills. She should have been seeing a doctor monthly after that, to monitor he condition.
No one told us that.
It’s been about a year since she went through all this!
So that’s going to be one of my regular tasks, now. Getting my mother to the clinic every month to monitor her condition. Which is going to be really hard on her, physically! She isn’t even making it to church, across the street, but now she’s going to have to climb in and out of my truck, then walk to and from the clinic, labs, etc.?
I really hope they find a space for her in supportive living soon, because this is just too much for her!
Anyhow.
The new bubble packs will not be ready until tomorrow, so we will have to take care of getting them then.
Since I’d come out so early, I was planning to have lunch before meeting with my brother and SIL at Mom’s place. They were getting things done early, too, though, and we ended up arranging to meet at the Chinese restaurant for lunch, instead. They still had quite a bit of driving to do, though, so it was going to be some time before they arrived. Which was fine. I just took my time eating. This place is very generous in their portions, so it was going to take a while, anyhow!
The joys of going to a family restaurant. I ordered at the counter and included some won ton soup in my order. When it was ready, it was brought to my table by the most adorable child. I think she might have been 9 or 10 years old. She was so very careful carrying the bowl!
She was also our waitress! When my brother and SIL arrived, she was the one who came to take their orders, brought them to the table, etc. She did a fantastic job!
I’m glad we were able to have lunch together, as it gave us a chance to talk, catch up on things and co-ordinate what we’d be doing next.
That made getting things done at my mother’s place much more efficient, though it did still take us about an hour to get her apartment ready. They brought the lock box they’d ordered, but I’m not sure the bubble packs will fit in it. It they do, it will be by millimeters!
We cleared out most of what was in my mother’s fridge. There wasn’t much there, and it was more about getting rid of things that were stale, or just not really fresh, and replacing it with what they picked up at the grocery store in the city earlier. Some things, I took home for the outside critters.
Among the things they got for my mother were some heat and eat soups that we hope Mom can open more easily; some in cans, some in single serving cartons.
I’m sure my mother will find reasons to complain about them or refuse to eat them, because they are “different”, and not what she’s used to. Still, I hope we can convince her to at least try them!
The lock box is set up and ready for her bubble packs – if they fit – and we’ll have to make sure home care has the combination. They’ve ordered a slightly larger one, so if it’s too small, it can be soon replaced. When I call to give them the combination for my mother’s file, I’ll have to make sure to let the case coordinator know that, if home care can’t make it for some reason, it takes me about half an hour to get to my mother’s place, if I leave right away.
Before we parted ways, we changed tomorrow’s plan slightly. Instead of my SIL picking me up at home, then driving me back after we drop off my mother, I will meet her at my mother’s place. I’ll leave my truck there as we go together to get my mother, then I can drive myself home. That will save her about an hour of extra driving!
The main thing is, my mother’s place is ready for her. Everything is cleaned up and sorted and arranged, and she has enough groceries for a while. My SIL even baked her cookies that she can share if she has a neighbour over for tea – if we don’t make it clear that’s why she has them, she will complain about how she isn’t supposed to eat sweet things (even though she does anyway).
When we bring her home tomorrow, I’ll have to make sure to show her where I put some of the non-perishables and, with the single serving carton soups, explain to her what they are. I know she’ll have difficulty seeing and reading the labels.
We still don’t know about the Life Line she will be getting, as that is arranged by the home care department, even though this is an outside service my mother will have to pay for. My brother and SIL are pretty sure my mother will find the Life Line overwhelming. I don’t know enough about it to say, one way or the other, but apparently my SIL’s late mother had it and was overwhelmed by it, and she did not have any sort of cognitive issues.
We shall see.
I know my mother will be glad to get out of the hospital, even though she quite enjoyed being taken care of and having meals delivered to her, etc. I think she is starting to get quite bored! At the same time, none of us are happy that she’s being sent home, when she really needs to be in supportive living, at the very least.
Well, we deal with the hand we’ve been dealt with.
The Re-Farmer 