The larger ones are the Albion Everbearing strawberries that have recovered remarkably well after getting eaten by a deer. I’ve had the odd ripe strawberry every now and then, but this is the first time there was more than one to gather. There were actually more than what’s in the photo, as I left behind a couple that were slug damaged.
The little ones are from the strawberries in the wattle weave bed that were grown from seed last year. They are still blooming, too, and there are lots of little green berries still developing. It’s a shame they don’t taste any better.
Once back inside, my younger daughter and I started getting ready to head out. My older daughter wasn’t going to make it. She’s been burning the candle at both ends, working on new commissions, and was not feeling well today.
The general plan was for us to have a sit down restaurant lunch with my mother, then go to the nature reserve. My daughter was hoping we could do a picnic instead. With my mother, it all comes down to how she feels, and what she is up to.
I remembered to bag up a few slicer tomatoes for her. Just enough for a taste, really. She’s not supposed to eat acidic foods, but small amounts, early in the day, don’t bother her. My sister usually brings my mother large amounts of tomatoes, forgetting completely that my mother isn’t supposed to eat them. This year, however, she mentioned her tomatoes did not do well, so she doesn’t really have any to give. We have so many of the Forme De Couer tomatoes, there is plenty to spare.
We packed supplies we’d need to eat outside, if we did end up doing that. Then my daughter made lots of noise, topping up the outside cat food, to lure kittens away from the truck. There was one kitten that just did not want to get out from under there! We managed to get them away, though, and soon we were off.
We left early enough to stop and pick up a birthday cake for my mother. Or, in this case, a variety of cheesecake slices! We still got to my mother’s early.
We didn’t stay for long before heading out. My mother needed to stop at her bank, first. They merged with another and she said she needed to order new checks. She’s sent a check and said it was rejected, because of the old company name.
Getting in and out of the truck was difficult for my mother, though. She tires so quickly now, too.
Once at the bank, the teller was confused about a check being returned, since all the key information was unchanged. It took a while to get the rest of the store out of her. It turns out, she did not get a check returned. She had sent the check to a grandson for his birthday. He had come over to see her, and told her it was rejected, apparently because of the date. It’s possible my mother wrote the date out in her usual mix of Polish, English, numbers and Roman numerals.
This grandson is one that never contacts her, nor returns her calls, and hasn’t since he turned 18 and got his inheritance from my late father. Now, suddenly, when there was a problem with a check she sent him, he shows up at her door? He also never returned the check, but just told her there was a problem. It seems the name being an issue was something my mother “figure out” herself. My guess is, with him there, she just gave him cash. My mother has a terrible habit of pandering to those who treat her the worst, while treating those who help her the most, quite badly.
The more the story came out, the more the teller seemed concerned. She checked, and no one had tried to cash a check in the last 3 months. She did assure my mother that she did not have to order new checks. The ones she has now are perfectly fine.
From there, she decided she was still up to a sit down restaurant. We did bring up the idea of getting take out and going on a picnic, but she acted as if she never heard.
We had an excellent lunch. My mother insisted that she would pay for it, but she never tips, so I snuck ahead and paid for it. By the time we were done eating, my mother decided she was up to going to the nature reserve. That got amended to her staying in the truck while my daughter and I explored. Not that we’d leave her by herself, but that’s what she pictured in her mind.
When we got there, I was going to just follow the roads to parking lots and we could see what we could see. I did end up taking a sign road, which turned out to be exclusively for people with disabilities. This allowed us to see parts of the sanctuary we had never seen before.
As we were going home, though, I was hit by exhaustion. The sleepy kind. It just came out of nowhere and slapped me upside the head!
When we got to my mother’s my daughter and I were going to leave right away, but my mother insisted we stop for tea and some of the cheesecake. She asked about the bill at the restaurant, and I showed her the slip that did not include the tip. She gets very angry when she sees us tip! She was very… parsimonious, shall we say, about paying me back, and actually underpaid me. Then she declared that my driving her was my birthday gift for her, as her reason for not contributing anything for gas this time. Which I normally wouldn’t care about, if I hadn’t found out she’s been practically throwing her money at people that have disowned her again. My daughters have joked that maybe we should start being mean to her, too, and she’ll start throwing money at us, too. Not that we could ever do that, but the sad thing is, it is probably true.
Overall, we managed to keep things okay during this visit. We were able to cut away from her usual racist rants, and she was only moderately insulting to my daughter about her appearance. As for why my other daughter didn’t make it, when we told her she wasn’t feeling well, my mother flat out said she didn’t believe it. 🫤 Ah, well.
She started showing us pictures and newspaper clippings that are her typical segues to more racist rants, so we cut things short, then made our escape. I could see she was getting very tired, anyhow.
Which I could completely understand.
Before we left, she gave us a couple of cards for the girls, and it turned out she was at least as generous to them, as she had been with the grandson that only shows up when money is involved.
My daughter drove us home, and I’m so glad she was there do to it. I was able to close my eyes for a bit during the drive home, at least!
Not enough to get some rest, though, so that’s what I’m about to do. Even though it’s late afternoon. I have been drifting off, time and again, just working on this blog post!
I tried going to bed early last night, which actually worked for a change, so I was able to get out and in the garden early. We were getting warnings for a possible thunderstorm (which never happened), so as soon as my morning rounds were done, I wanted to work on my tomatoes.
The first of the Instagram slideshow photos is as far as I got with the San Marzano tomatoes in the main garden area.
I was even able to pick a few tomatoes, first. They were so tightly packed in with the vines, a couple were weirdly misshapen, having had to grow around stems and even one of the bamboo supports.
With this bed, though, only the main stems were supported by the stakes. These weren’t pruned, so they all have suckers on them. The three southernmost plants (in the foreground) had suckers spread out and lying on the ground like a thick, green spider’s web! You can see a bit, how I added support to those vines.
For most of them, I couldn’t reach the stake in the middle, so I loosely tied jute twine to the stem I wanted to support, under a leaf stem, or the nub of one, if it was one that was broken off. I did prune some of the bottom leaves away, awhile back, as they were crushing the onions planted around them. The twine was then wrapped around the stem, with extra wraps near the base so it wouldn’t pull upwards. I didn’t skimp on the wraps all the way up, and made sure that any branches with clusters of tomatoes on them had wraps above and below. Once near the top, the whole thing was gently lifted, and the top tied to the support.
With so many of these branches splayed out around the main stem, I alternated sides as I worked, to more evenly distribute the weight. I also moved the metal posts that were marking the corners of the bed, as I was shifting it over. Those were brought closer in and pushed deep into the soil, so they – hopefully! – wouldn’t be pulled over. I then anchored the stake at the end of the row onto them.
As I worked on the next two tomato plants, I also straightened stakes that were being pulled down by the weight of the main vine, and secured them to the previous stake. With one plant, I could access the stake as I worked, so the jute twine was anchored to the stake at the bottom, rather than the base of the stem I was working on. A couple of vines were even anchored to the stake about half way up, as they were being wrapped. Not too close against the stake, though, but with space for air flow.
The three at the south end got done, but it took so long, I had to move on. The others don’t look like they will need individual wrapping like this. I’ll see, when I get back to them.
The second photo in the slideshow above is of the Black Cherry vines in the Old Kitchen Garden. They are getting so big and heavy, the lilac they are climbing is bending from the weight! These are already tied off and supported as much as can be, though.
Note for future reference. Find a way to incorporate stakes into the wattle weave to support things like this! The lilac can handle supporting the luffa vines just fine, but these tomatoes are just too big and heavy, and those branches are not near the main stems of the lilac.
It was the bed with the Forme de Couer tomatoes that needed help. I had to post this photo separately on Instagram, because it’s oriented differently. It was the bamboo stakes that had to be helped.
Each plant has a pair of stakes to support it. The pair in the bottom right corner of the photo were so heavy, the stakes were twisted around and starting to lean into the bath between this bed, and the wattle weave bed with the Black Cherry tomatoes. You can even see a bit, just above where the jute twine is tied, that one of them had started to split and bend. If there hadn’t already been some twine holding the pairs of stakes together, there’s no doubt the whole thing would have broken and fallen into the path.
That one got attention first. I was able to carefully pull the stakes upright again, then anchored them to the opposite corner of the raised bed. More twine was added to the pairs of stakes along one side, anchoring them to each other, then to the corners of the raised bed at the other end, before being tied off on the last pair of stakes on the opposite side. The other stakes on that side had already had support added to them and did not need more.
Once that was done, it was time to clean up and head into town. My friend from out of province had time to meet for lunch, one more time before she had to go home.
I left early so that I could stop at the dollar store, first. With one of the yard cats going in for a neuter next week, we have to start deciding which one we’ll be trying to catch. The friendliest ones have already done, but one of those is really hard to tell apart from others, now that the wound on his front leg is completely healed, without even a scar visible through is fur.
What I’ve decided to do is to try and put break-away collars on the four that have already been neutered, then another to add onto whichever cat we manage to catch and bring in next.
The store had only one style with breakaway snaps on them, so that’s what I got. They all have bells, which will need to be removed. These are outdoor cats, and they earn their keep by keeping the rodent population down. Having a bell would defeat the purpose, plus make them easier targets for coyotes.
After that, I hung around and enjoyed the day until my friend and I met up and went for lunch in the fish ‘n chips place that reopened not long ago. They’d been closed for many months, repairing and renovating after a fire (when I first saw the boarded up building, I actually thought they’d been vandalized). It’s the same owners using their same recipes, and their food was every bit as delicious as before. We quite enjoyed our lunch – and the portions were generous enough that both of us got take out containers to bring the leftover home!
My friend still had some time left before she had to go, so we got to walk on the beach for a while – a nice quite beach, now that the summertime crowds are done, and it’s the middle of the week! Then she had to head back. She’s leaving very early in the morning, and has a long drive ahead of her, so she had lots to do to get ready. Including a grocery shopping trip for her mother.
That sure sounds familiar! 😁
While I was in town, I got a message from my husband, letting me know the feed store had called, and the lysine they’d ordered for me was in. So, after we said our goodbyes, I headed to my mother’s town to pick it up, along with more kibble for the outside cats.
This morning, I tried to do a head count of just kittens. That’s a bit of a challenge, as some of the adult cats are pretty small, and the older kittens are almost as big as they are!
I counted twenty.
I think.
In the photo above, with the kittens, you can see the bright white granular type lysine on the bottom of the kibble tray. That is why I was wanting to have a finer powder, like I had been able to get before, but is no longer available.
If you look at the second picture of the slide show above, you’ll see the lysine I got today. I opened one of the tubs right in the store, as soon as I paid for it.
This bulk lysine is sold for horses, so I guess they don’t bother bleaching it white, like for human consumption! It’s still granular, though. Lysine is lysine, though, so it is otherwise the same.
I think what I’ll just have to do is use that Magic Bullet set we were gifted with, and just process the granules into a fine powder. This will coat the kibble better, and the cats are more likely to actually get a dose of the stuff. Thankfully, aside from eye baby, there don’t seem to be any sick cats out there right now. Just a little bit of crusty bits visible in the corners of some of their eyes, but nothing major. None need to have their eyes washed. Even eye baby’s messed up eye isn’t leaking much. It’s just really… gross.
No, I will not inflict you with a photo!
Anyhow.
Along with the lysine (I got two 1 pound tubs, which cost just under $20 each), I got the bag of kibble I’d paid for last time, but they turned out to have only two bags in stock, not three. Then I got one more on top of that.
Once done at the feed store, I headed home.
I don’t know what’s been going on with me lately, but during the drive home, a wave of tired just hit me. I don’t mean physically tired, or even mentally tired. I mean sleepy tired!
I did get a good night’s sleep! Honest!
Once I was at home, I unloaded everything but the 40 pound bags of kibble in the box of the truck, then went for a nap. When I woke up after a couple of hours, I was feeling even more groggy than when I lay down in the first place!
So I just did my evening rounds, but let my daughter that was going to help me, know that I wasn’t up to finishing with those last San Marzano tomatoes. They will be fine for another day.
Meanwhile, the writing of this paused just had a pause to it, as I dosed and fed eye baby, while my daughter held him, wrapped up like a purrito – and there was much purring happening!
Gosh, I wish all cats took their meds as well as this little guy!
I gave his face a bit of a wash around the eye, and just laid a warm, damp cloth over the eye itself, before giving him some saline drops. I wish I knew what I was looking at with that eye. All I can say for sure is, it’s getting better – as in, it’s not sticking out as much, and not leaking like it had been, when we first started treating him. He even seemed to enjoy the cleaning.
That is now done for the night, and that’s as much as I have energy for. I’m done for the day. My younger daughter and I have plans to watch Columbo together tonight.
Today, we were expecting another hot day. There was a small potential chance for rain in the morning, but not a lot.
It was also my day to help my mother with her groceries, so was outside, watering the garden, earlier than usual.
It was a rather strange thing to start hearing thunder, and find myself hoping I could finish watering the garden before the rain hit!
I did get the main garden area watered, then emptied the last of the rain barrel to water the old kitchen garden. I did have an adorable surprise with that, though!
I’ve got two watering cans that I fill and bring with me to whatever section I’m working on. As I was reaching down to pick the second watering can up, something was looking at me!
There, clutching the opening of the watering can, was a green tree frog – on the inside of the can!!!
I tried to carefully get it out, but it let go and dropped into the water, instead. So I emptied the can on the wattle weave bed as quickly as I could. I ended up having to turn the can upside down and shaking it to get the frog out! Thankfully, it was none the worse for it, and soon hopped away.
Gosh, tree frogs are so adorable!
The girls, meanwhile, took care of eye baby. Now that we are out of eye drops, and the antibiotics are given in the evening, this just making sure she got fed supplemented cat soup with the modified bottle, then an eye washing before setting her outside.
The bottle feeding can get a bit messy.
We’re using a nipple that is cut back for a wider opening, but the cat soup sometimes still has chunky bits just big enough to block the opening. Which means, every now and then, it spontaneously plugs, then unplugs – all over the kitten! On top of that, once she’s done, she just closes her mouth and turns her face away, and ends up with cat soup all over her face.
When it started raining harder and I had to come inside, I discovered one of the other kittens, cleaning eye baby up!
The other kitten was very enthusiastically grooming that cat soup, out of her fur!
She seemed to be quite content with the attention.
In the other slideshow photos, there’s that little fluffy cat. She is, if I remember correctly, one of the late litter of eight kittens from last year. She is also the one that dropped her litter of kittens all over the yard and abandoned them. I’m really working on trying to get her socialized at least a bit. If we can catch her to get her fixed next month, that would be awesome! So far, she has started to allow me to pet her after I’ve set food out in the kibble house. She prefers to eat there over the other areas we scatter kibble. Outside the kibble house and no food around, though, she still won’t let me near her.
As for the others, I tried to do a head count this morning, counting both adults and kittens. I think I counted 31, but when I counted again, I got 29. Broccoli and her two were not there; I saw them later at the old garden shed. There were a couple of regular adults that weren’t there, either, including Brussel. There is at least one kitten that has gone “missing”. The fluffy orange one that showed up with Baby Hypotenose – the two kittens that Sprout finally brought to the house. I have been seeing Baby Hypotenose a fair bit, but its orange sibling just disappeared. If this is another loss, that would be the last of the orange kittens gone. We have one orange tabby and one orange and white among the younger adult males, plus the Grand Old Lady, Rolando Moon, and that’s it for orange cats. Quite the change from when we first moved here, and almost all the outside cats were orange tabbies!
Since I was out so early this morning, I actually had time for breakfast before I had to leave for my mother’s. I timed it so that I could pick up lunch for us. She likes the dinners that the grocery store sometimes has available, but there were none today. Which I didn’t mind. I was really looking forward to some Chinese food.
They were closed.
They weren’t supposed to be closed. All the signs said they should have been open, and I could see lights on inside, but the door was locked. I ended up going around the back of the motel the restaurant is in and went in through the bar. The lights were on in the dining room, but the kitchen and back areas were all dark. I asked the woman working the bar before leaving, and she had no idea why they weren’t open.
I ended up going to the gas station to get some of their fried chicken and wedges, getting there just as they were bringing out the first batch of chicken for the day.
Which was good – theirs is the best fried chicken! – but I really was looking forward to Chinese food! 😄
Then I had the problem of getting into my mother’s building.
It was locked!
This has happened only once before. The main doors are usually never locked, even overnight. These are also the accessible doors, with the automatic door openers; another reason for those doors to never be locked!
I do have keys but, for some reason, the outside door key have never worked. It almost works – the lock did start to turn, but towards the “lock” position, not the “unlock” position. I have no idea why it doesn’t work. My mother’s own key does sometimes stick, too, but nothing like this! I ended up having to phone my mother to let her know I was at the door closer to her apartment, but couldn’t get in.
So my mother had to toodle over with her walker to let me in. These doors have a tiny vestibule between an unlockable inner door and the always locked from the outside outer door. My mother was able to open the inside door, then had to use her walker to block it open so she could push the bar on the outside door top open it for me. (When coming in from the outside, there is barely enough room in the vestibule for her walker, and for the door to swing open. It still ended up hitting one of her wheels, but she prefers it over using the main doors.)
The alternative would have been to make her walk down the hall and through the lobby to reach the main doors, and still have to fight to open two doors. The inside one, at least, would have opened with the push of a button, but the walk would have been harder on my mother than opening the doors closer to her apartment.
What a pain!
Once inside, I set things up and we had our lunch. While moving things aside, I saw she had a notice of inspection for bedbugs again. She told me, it was just slid under her door this morning. It looks like they will be back on the 28th. I looked up the calendar on my phone to confirm what day that falls on, while she quickly tucked the letter away before I could read the rest!
It falls on the day I’ll be making my first stock up shopping trip to the city.
My mother is not happy about them coming by again. The last time they did, she didn’t get up to let them in because she wasn’t feeling well. She did yell out verbal permission for them to come in, but they would not. She doesn’t quite understand that she risks eviction by constantly finding ways to avoid them! She doesn’t appear to have bedbugs, but if her neighbours do, that can change very quickly, and they are required to check a certain number of times since the last time they sprayed.
Once we had our lunch, we went over her shopping list. There were a few things I needed to clear up. She writes her list in a sort of mix of Polish and English, and her English words are spelled phonetically – in Polish! She then makes little drawings of the things she has on the list, but sometimes that doesn’t make it any clearer! I mean, a sour cream container and a yogurt container are basically the same. 😄
This time, she had flour on her list – it was even spelled correctly in English! – but the doodle was quite clearly and ear of corn. Corn flour? My mother doesn’t use corn flour, but that’s what she called it.
She meant corn meal, which she uses all the time.
I did explain to her that corn meal and corn flour are different things. I don’t think she’ll remember, though, as she’s never seen corn flour, so she doesn’t have any sort of connection to make to help her remember. Not that it’s a problem, but I did want to clarify, based on what she had on her list!
Her list was very short, so I asked a few questions and a few more things were added to it. She had the newest flier, too, so we went over some of the sale items, and talked about possibly substitutions. There was no meat on the list, and the only thing that could be considered a protein was the cheese I ended up adding to her list after going through the flier with her. She insisted that she still had plenty. I am suspicious, though, as she has increasingly tried to blame eating meat or “heavy foods” (she has her own definition of what that is!) on her not feeling well.
At one point, she started telling me that she feels like she’s dying, every night, and had considered getting me to take her to the clinic in the nearby hospital. She’s also becoming obsessed with an appointment with the “new doctor” that’s there, because it conflicted with a home visit appointment she had on the same day. I was the one who cancelled the appointment for her, so I knew that it was not with the new doctor. It was with a nurse practitioner. It was my sister that had taken her in to the clinic, but no one was available to see my mother, so they made this appointment – and forgot about the date. Neither of them seemed to realize that the appointment was with whoever was available, not the new doctor.
I suggested that if she wanted to see a doctor, I could make an appointment with her current one for her. She actually yelled angrily at me, NO! I told her, you’ve got a good doctor, and she laughed and made a comment about the doctor talking to the computer instead of to her. I told her, the doctor was reading what she was looking up on her file. Some people tend to think out loud, or read out loud, as they do that. I was with my mother during her last appointment, and could see that’s what she was doing; as she read through my mother’s file, she would sometimes say parts of it out loud, very quickly. It’s entirely possible the doctor doesn’t even notice that she’s doing it.
When I explained that to her, my mother finally just said, “I’m scared of black people.”
*sigh*
With how hard it is to find a doctor these days – especially when living outside the city – it’s aggravating that she’s allowing her racism to deny herself the health care she’s demanding!
As we talked, I brought up again, she needs a hospital bed, so she can sleep upright.
Which is when she started saying it was her stomach – her digestive system (she literally does not understand what is or isn’t part of her digestive system, or where the organs are located in her body) – that she now thinks is the cause of her troubles, then tried to make connections with eating “heavy food”, like the chicken we just ate…
I asked her, what does that have to do with her breathing? She’s been complaining that she can’t breathe at night, and that’s why she feels like she’s dying. Now, she says it’s her stomach?
I tried to ask more questions, but she changed the subject.
*sigh*
It’s frustrating that she is so all over the place with how she feels, and latch onto things as the “cause” of all her problems, usually because of something she heard on TV, or one of the people in her building saying. But when solutions are offered – like having a hospital bed so she can sleep more upright – she refuses.
Other than this, though, things went smoothly. I worked out what she needed on her list, then did the shopping for her.
Once everything was put away, I stayed a bit longer, but was feeling incredibly sleepy. The overcast skies and rainy weather has that effect on me. I still had to go back to the grocery store for a water jug refill – just one, for now – before going home, too.
Once that was done and I got home, I went for a nap almost right away. It seems I really needed that sleep, too!
As for right now, the skies are clear again and it’s sunny out there, so I’m looking forward to my evening rounds. Meanwhile, as I was writing this, my younger daughter came in to let me know that she was able to harvest the last of the garlic for me! They were getting a bit over due!
For now, they’re laid out on the freezer in the old kitchen. Once the dirt has dried out a bit more, we’ll brush them off, trim them and string them up to hang with the others in the garage.
As for the cat isolation shelter build in the garage, I won’t be doing anything on it today. I’ll see what I can do tomorrow. Mostly, though, I think I’ll have to go through the sheds and garage again, so see what materials I can find to continue the build, until I have the budget to buy the materials I need to finish it.
Hopefully, I’ll be able to find what I need and get this finished soon. I will have to double check with the Cat Lady to see what date she has booked for us, for a spay or neuter (depending on what cat we can catch!). If we end up with a male, we won’t need the isolation shelter, but if we can get that fluffy little cat, or one of the other mamas, that would be idea.
I was finally able to connect with my mother last night and, as expected, she needed a grocery shopping trip. So we made plans for that, and I headed to bed early.
I even fell asleep!
Then, in the wee hours of the morning, I rolled over and got hit with a Charlie horse. After much pain and difficulty, I finally managed to reach my phone and send a voice to text message to my daughter, asking for help.
I love technology.
She was able to give me a hand, bring me some ibuprofen, etc., until the cramps finally eased off. When I was finally able to walk, she stayed close while I made my way to the bathroom and back, ready to help me get back into bed if I needed it. Thankfully, I did not, but the muscles kept threatening to cramp up again. I finally got up and made myself something to eat. By the time I was done and able to get back into bed, I slept so hard, I never heard the thunderstorm and heavy rains that swept over us! I didn’t know we’d had a downpour at all until morning. My leg was still unstable, so I asked the girls to do the outside stuff and water the garden, but the garden didn’t need it this morning.
My mother and I had plans to go out for lunch before I did her shopping, so I intended to be there on the early side. While the girls did the outside stuff, I still wanted to check on things before I left, which reminded me to take pictures of the garden beds to show my mother.
One of the first things I saw as I headed out from the sun room were the new kittens – and their mama!
It is now confirmed: their mama is Sprout. I knew she must have had a litter somewhere, but this is the first time we’ve seen her with kittens.
The orange kitten looks so fluffy!
Unfortunately, Sprout is one of the more feral of the yard cats. She is even aggressive to the other cats, snarling, growling and hissing at them if they come too close. That might make it harder to socialize those kittens!
Then, as I was heading to the truck to head to my mother’s, I spotted Brussel’s last kitten.
She and her baby still like to hang out in and around the garage, much like Broccoli and her babies prefer to hang out by the garden shed.
The visit with my mother went okay. When I got there, she told me she was not up to going out to eat, so she’d made lunch, instead. I wish I’d known in advance, or I would have brought food. I don’t like eating her groceries! It did give us a chance to talk, and I showed her the photos I took of the garden (those will be in my next post), then we went over her shopping list, which included a stop at the pharmacy.
There were a couple of things I forgot to pick up when I went to the grocery store for ourselves, yesterday, so I did both our shopping at the same time. I even picked up a few extra things for my mother that weren’t on her list, but the prices were good, and I knew she could use them. Other things, I found substitutes, because the prices were too high. Still, she’s now well stocked for the week, and that’s the important part.
The visit did have its down sides. After I’d put everything away, she had the local paper out and open. Our vandal has made his annual “in memory” listing about my late brother, with a colour photo of him with my late father. This impressed my mother greatly, because he does it every year, and it costs extra to include a colour photo. The fact that the content is passive aggressive and misleading – even outright false, in one thing – she is totally impressed by it. I told her I’d already seen the listing online, and she was all “and you didn’t tell me?” My response was, why would I? He does this every year, and it’s not like he’s doing it out of the goodness of his heart. She then launched into making excuses for him and how he’s doing such great things, like volunteering to cut grass at the cemetery. Which I’m sure he made sure she knew about. Well, I visited the cemetery, too, but I don’t tell her about it, or about the flowers I added at the family graves, etc. Coming from me, she would find ways to either tell me how I am doing it wrong, or find a way to turn it around and start saying how great our vandal is.
Then I found out, he’d come by her place recently.
I told her, he shouldn’t be doing that.
She, of course, tried to turn it around on me, because that’s what she does. It took me a while to figure out what she was saying, because she phrased it so oddly, but she essentially said, if my daughters did what our vandal did, would I cut them off entirely? I told her, if they did what he did, yes! I would hold them responsible and accountable. I then called her out on making excuses for him the way she does, pointing out that he’s stolen 10’s of thousands of dollars of stuff from her that was on the farm (heck, his taking stuff was one of the biggest reasons she asked us to move here!), but that’s okay because he put a colour picture in the paper? He does this stuff because people have been letting him get away with is for years. I’m the first person to stand up to him, and he ended up vandalizing the place, we have to keep the gate locked, and worry that he’ll suddenly show up and try to burn the house down or something.
She changed the subject after that.
That was pretty much the only real downside of the visit. Mostly, I think she was just too tired to be as difficult as she usually is.
I didn’t stay too much longer after putting things away, since I did have my own few purchases getting hot in the truck, so I headed home soon after.
Once at home and settled, I gave the outside cats their lysine enhanced kibble. Since it’s the more granular type of lysine, I have been making sure the kibble bowls get some water in them, so it’ll stick to the kibble. With some of the bowls, I add extra water, as the kittens seem to prefer it, and this way they are getting more hydration in this heat, and the lysine will be dissolved in the water. Some of the kittens are getting leaky eyes and noses, including Button, and I want to make sure they get their lysine! It helps strengthen their immune systems.
No sign of the new kittens this time, though.
Then I went into the garden, but I’ll talk about that in my next post.
As for how things are now, my leg is still feeling like it’s about to start cramping up on me. More so as I’m sitting down then while I’m walking around. I’m going to be feeling downright nervous, getting into bed tonight! I’ve been looking into the various possible causes. One was the lawn mowing in the heat, but I didn’t do anywhere near as much as I have in the past. Lack of electrolytes is a possibility. I’m already taking B12 and Magnesium supplements, but it looks like I might be low on potassium and sodium, too. At least, those are the only possible causes I can be proactive about. Others include things like “getting older”. 😄
Well, we reached our predicted high of 31C/88F, with the humidex putting us at 33C/91F, and we’re not expected to start cooking down until well into the evening.
I had a much interrupted night, so the girls took care of the outside stuff for me, including watering the garden, so I could try and get some more sleep. Which is rather difficult when, every now and then, a cat will suddenly get the zoomies and parkour off my body while careening across my room. What a way to be awakened!
I did make my trip into town, late this morning. It was slightly delayed when I stopped at the post office to pick up a package, and found my daughter’s computer was in a day early! I’d even checked the tracking this morning, and it was still saying tomorrow, by the end of day. Once I had that, I went back home to drop it off, then headed into town. My daughter hasn’t tried to take it upstairs yet. Her old computer is still chugging away, backing things up onto online storage – a very sloooooow process. She’ll start getting the new machine set up during the night.
I had intended to see what errands I could do while I was in town after sanitizing and filling our water jugs (it’s a different grocery store than where I usually go to, that has a sanitation station with their refill fountains), I got a message from my husband asking if I could swing by the Greek restaurant and pick up a couple of gyros for him. I found out this morning that my husband had eaten almost nothing all day yesterday – he just didn’t have any appetite – and his blood sugars dropped dangerously low. He had to pop glucose tablets to get himself back up again. The water refill station at the grocery store happened to be next to their pharmaceutical section, and they had some of the glucose tablets in stock, so I grabbed a bottle. With his Ozempic dose being doubled, the danger of his blood glucose levels dropping are much higher. Which ticks me off because I am 100% certain that is his chronic pain could be brought under control, he blood sugars would normalize. However, there’s no fix for his back, and so far, no pain killers tried have been able to get it under control. At best, it become more bearable. It’s like when he was diagnosed diabetic the first time. After that he was diagnosed with sleep apnea and started using a CPAP. Almost immediately, his blood sugars normalized and he lost about 100 pounds. I suspect the increase in dose for the Ozempic is more for the potential side effect of weight loss, but he’s been on this stuff for years now, and it has had zero effect on his weight. Plenty of other side effects, like losing much of his sense of taste, a loss of appetite, loss of muscle mass and intestinal distress, but his weight just won’t change.
Needless to say, when he asked for the gyros, my other plans went out the window, got his food and headed straight home with it, and skipped the other places I was going to check out.
I had been thinking of going to the dump later today, when it opens for the evening, but we really don’t have enough garbage and recycling to make it worth burning the gas in another trip.
My other plan had been to try and get some lawn mowed this morning, before it got hot, but that didn’t work out. Tomorrow is supposed to be a little bit cooler, so I will see if I can get it done then. In fact, our entire 10 day forecast has changed and, after tomorrow, we’re now supposed to be closer to 20C/68F instead of in the 30C/86F range.
I just got back from refreshing the cats’ water bowls outside, and adding frozen water bottles in a couple of them to help keep them cooler. The cats are just splattered all over, trying to keep cool
So happy to see Button in there, getting some nip!
I’m just looking back at some of my garden posts from a year ago. At this time, our garlic was all harvested and curing, and I tried planting beets, radishes and spinach in the empty bed (they did not do well at all). I was also harvesting bush beans, turnips and G-Star pattypan squash. Not a lot, but at least something! I was even getting some yellow zucchini and the odd green one from the plants that survived getting eaten by slugs. We had Black Beauty tomatoes getting so big and heavy, we had to add extra supports. Our Spoon tomatoes were turning red, and our Sweet Chocolate peppers were covered in developing fruit. We even started harvesting some Indigo Blue tomatoes, and our Pink Banana and Georgia Candy Roaster had so many huge squash developing!
I’ll be doing another garden tour video in the middle of the month. Hopefully, things will have progressed between now and then! It should be interesting to compare the two.
For now, though, the main priority is to keep things protected from the heat.
Today was my day to take my mother to her medical appointment. It got hot fast this morning, even as I was just going my rounds. As I write this, coming up on 7pm, we are still at 29C/84F, and the humidex is at 34C/93F. This heat is supposed to continue for the next couple of days, and no rain or even thunderstorms expected, so tomorrow morning, I’ll have to make sure to give the garden beds a deep watering, before it gets really hot again.
I am really appreciating the AC in the truck!
I was thinking of going to my mother’s a bit early, so we could get a bit of a visit in before her appointment, since I had to go to pick up eggs after. I was going to call her to see if she was good with my arriving early when she called me, instead.
While I was in the washroom, of course.
The message she left was almost a wail, asking where I was, and did I forget about the appointment today?
I had told her I would arrive at about noon. She was calling shortly after 11.
So I called her back and told her I could leave right away. In the end, it was only about half an hour earlier than I intended to be there originally.
I tried to have a conversation with her. I really did!
Unfortunately, it didn’t work out well. A couple of times, I was trying to share some information with her related to the topic at hand, and she would cut me off and start going off on a rant. It was as if she’d assumed the conclusion of what I was saying and responding to that – even though it was not at all what I was trying to say. She had no interest in what I was actually saying, but in what she thought I was saying.
When she cut me off again by making a racist comment, I gave up and suggested it was time to leave.
So we were a bit early for the appointment.
While in the waiting room, we got to talking about the purpose of the appointment, which was to get her medications reviewed, including the changes done by the ER doctor, and for the pharmacy to get the updated information before they have to do her next bubble packs.
That’s when I found out my mother wasn’t taking the one pill the ER doctor told her to start taking again, every day. She was taking it every other day. She had already been saying to me, how she was feeling better after being back on the pill, but then she was saying that she was feeling worse after being back on that pill.
I told her she needs to stop messing with her prescriptions, and that we needed to make sure to tell the doctor about this. She was to stop taking the pill for 30 days, and the blood work she had done would tell the doctor if anything about it needed to be changed.
When the doctor came in, we explained about my mother going to the ER. She tried to look it up on my mother’s file.
The hospital never sent the information to her!
She was able to go online and link into their files, though, and see test results, at least. There were no notes of any kind attached, which was very frustrating. The ER doctor had not only told my mother to start taking this one prescription again, but doubled another one, so she’s now taking it morning and evening – but no information as to why the doctor made these decisions!
The other information was there, though. My mother had Xrays done, and everything looked clear. The hospital’s blood work was done a week after my mother did her scheduled blood work after stopping the pill for 30 days, so the doctor was able to compare three different test results; the first one that identified a problem, then the other two showing any changes.
My mother’s results showed significant improvement in that 30 day period, and even more improvement in just the week before the ER tested her again. Everything is now right back where it should be!
The doctor has taken this pill off my mother’s prescriptions. If my mother starts to have any particular symptoms start, she’ll add it back, but only as a “take as needed” prescription, not part of her bubble packs.
My mother’s turning 93 this year and, for all her complaints about her health, she is remarkably resilient and has an amazing recovery time. It’s just amazing!
After her appointment was done, my mother had wanted to go to a particular grocery store that was on our way out of town, but she changed her mind as we were leaving. It turned out she’d only eaten a piece of toast for breakfast, and had deliberately not eaten lunch before this appointment. I’m not sure why! Needless to say, she was famished, so we stopped for lunch and shared a pizza. After that, she didn’t have the energy to get out of the truck again.
As we were leaving her town, I’d pointed out to her where I’d be going to get eggs later; part of their property borders the highway. My mother suggested I stop to pick up the eggs on the way, rather than driving back later. She even said she might want to get some eggs, too.
Of course, what she really wanted as to see was the egg lady’s place and make judgements. Because that’s what my mother does!
I ended up sending a message to the egg lady, because I wasn’t sure if she was even home.
She wasn’t, but she was on the way.
I told her about my mother being interested in getting a dozen eggs, too, and we worked things out. I was going to stop at a gas station and take my time about it, to give her more time to get home ahead of me.
Which worked out well. We got there and, as we were driving in, my mother got to see the guinea hens, and a couple of free range goats, without having to leave the truck.
She changed her mind about the eggs, though. Which I expected, since I knew that was just her way to get me to take her to the egg lady’s place.
I don’t think my mother was impressed. It didn’t look like a picture postcard, but an active homestead and home based business that also involved animals.
I’m probably going to hear about it later. At the time, she was just too tired to say much.
I got her home and settled in, but couldn’t stay long with the eggs in the truck; they didn’t fit in any of my insulated bags. Hopefully, my mother went for a nap soon after I left!
As we were driving into her town, though, I realized the farmer’s market was started. It’s every Friday, but I’m almost never in this town on Fridays. I saw my cousin’s truck there, too, so I wanted to make a quick stop.
But first, I wanted to stop at a nearby feed store. We haven’t been able to connect with the Cat Lady to pick up the kibble donation, and we were running low. I knew the grocery store prices would be insane, but maybe the feed store would be better.
Plus, it was half a block away from the farmer’s market.
So I went there first and looked around. Sure enough, they did have cat food – in 40 pound bags! (18.1kg). The price was a little over $60, though, which would have used up most of my cash on hand. They did have 20 pound bags (9.1kg) for just over $30, though. It looked like they had only one 20lb bag left, too! So I bought it and paid cash. Then I picked up the bag and set it on my shoulder to carry it out.
Which is when I heard and felt something very strange.
I pulled the bag down and discovered the sewn strip across the top had come loose. I’d just spilled kibble all over the floor!
Of course, I was very apologetic. What mess!
The guy behind the counter came out with a broom and dustpan to clean it up while telling the other guy (the owner?), who was in the office, what happened. They talked back and forth for a bit when the other guy said, “give her a 40 pound bag.”
??? !!!
In the end, the other guy came out and went to their storage building out back and got me a 40 pound bag himself, while the guy behind the counter finished sweeping up the kibble.
So I got to take home a 40 pound bag for the price of a 20 pound bag!
That was so awesome of them!
As soon as possible, I want to go back and pay the difference.
The one guy (the one I think is the owner) was also complaining to the guy behind the counter that almost ever third bag they’ve been getting, the stitching is loose at one corner, so this is not the first time it’s been a problem! As he was loading the bag into the back of my truck, he made a point of telling me this, and to watch out for those corners.
With such great customer service, I definitely plan to go back there!
Plus…
While the price per kg is slightly higher than what I’m paying at Walmart for the 9kg bags, and Costco has even better prices for that size, the price is SO much better than at the grocery stores. Factoring in the cost of gas to drive to the city, and it comes out cheaper.
So while we will still pick up kibble when we are already in the city to do our stock up shopping, when it comes time to get more, later in the month, it would be more cost effective to buy from the feed store than to drive to the nearest Walmart.
Best of all, I’ve already given some to the cats outside, and they like it. The last time I got kibble at a feed store, it was in another town, and they had 16kg bags (35 pounds) for an even better price. The problem was, the cats didn’t like it, at all. Even the outside cats didn’t want to eat it. They did anyhow, since there was nothing else, but this stuff is clearly a better quality cat food.
After getting the cat food, I popped over to the farmer’s market. I talked to my cousin for a while, and picked up some of his creamed honey. He doesn’t have a lot of honey right now; he lost all his bees when a neighbour sprayed their field for grasshoppers, and had to buy more. He doesn’t have much of an inventory yet. No 3kg buckets for quite a while!
Then, I made a quick stop at a booth selling baked goods and picked up a bumbleberry pie. It had better be good – it cost more than the honey I just bought, and more than twice the grocery store price!
While I was doing that, I got a message from my husband asking if I could swing by the post office. I had just enough time to get there before they closed.
All this made for a very long day, but a more productive one than I expected. I’m really glad I remembered this feed store and decided to check it out.
Ugh. I need to go outside and do my evening rounds. It’s now coming up on 8pm, and we’re still 27C/81F with the humidex at 30C/86F.
It’s going to be sticky out there!
Even our overnight temperatures are supposed to only drop to 19C/66F. I think I’ll be leaving my window fan to keep blowing hot air out, for the night.
There should be quite a few raspberries to pick, though, so I’d better remember to bring a bucket of some kind, and get out there!
Adam was blocking my way into the house again, nursing the bebbies – including Button! I’m so happy to see he’s been absorbed into the creche.
Now for the more serious stuff.
Last night, I got a call from my mother. She had called for an ambulance and, as we had discussed before, she was letting me know so that I could update the rest of the family and check on her place, etc.
That was at about… 4:30pm – ish.
After several hours with no word, I tried calling the closer hospital ER I thought they would take her to.
She wasn’t there.
So I tried the next hospital, and there she was.
She was stable and doing fine, but a doctor had not seen her yet.
After confirming phone numbers for myself and my brother, who has PoA, that was about it.
My plan was to head over to check on her place in the morning. I wasn’t decided on whether I should call the hospital before I left, or from my mother’s town.
I ended up not being able to sleep at all until past 5am. Since I was intending to do some driving, when I woke up less than 2 hours later, I asked my daughters to take care of the morning outside stuff and tried to get more sleep.
It didn’t work.
About an hour later, I found a direct message from my brother, asking if I’d heard anything. No one had called him. I had not heard anything, either.
I was tying my shoes, getting ready to head out, when the phone rang. It was the hospital, letting me know my mother was discharged and ready to go home with a prescription. After confirming which entrance I’d be picking her up at, I was on my way.
It turns out she’d spent the entire night basically in the waiting room, in between getting tests and Xrays done. There were no beds available. When I got there, she was talking to another older woman who had been there just as long as my mother, and still hadn’t been seen by a doctor! It was 15 hours in the ER by then!
I got my mother into the truck, and she was so tired, she wanted to go straight home. She was, at least, given a meal while she was there!
I tried to ask lots of questions about how things went, and she was already starting to forget details. I got information in dribs and drabs over the next while. When we were at her place, she showed me the hand written prescription she was given. I didn’t think she had one, since she also told me the doctor assured her copies of everything would go to both her doctor and the pharmacy.
The good news is, the issue found the last time she saw the doctor has improved. The bad news it, it had nothing to do with why she called the ambulance. She did get one of her prescription doses increased, though, and – little by little – she told me things the doctor suggested that we’ve already been trying to get her to do for … oh… several years now? She still flat out refuses to get a hospital bed.
Then she showed me the physical prescription. I couldn’t read some of it, but it looked like one medication’s dose was increase, so I said I would take it to the pharmacy and talk to them about it.
I’m glad I did. They needed that physical copy.
It turned out one medication was back to normal; the pharmacy didn’t even know there was a chance, since it was a temporary experiment. Another did have an increased dose. After some discussion, I went back to my mother’s to get her bubble packs, so they could add the change to them. It was going to take long enough that I had time to have breakfast while I waited!
By the time I got the updated bubble packs and brought them to my mother. She was sleeping soundly, so I just left them on her table with a note.
I think hung around town just long enough that the post office would be open when I got to our little hamlet. M, I got your surprise parcels, but have not looking them them yet. Thank you so much! I ended up having 4 packages, including a large but light one, so I messaged my daughters to have one of them meet me at the garage, to bring them in.
Once we got everything inside, it was late enough that I decided to top up the kibble for the outside cats.
That’s when I found a less pleasant surprise, on the ground under the water bowl shelter.
A stillborn kitten, still fully encased in its amniotic sac and attached to its placenta.
I went around to put kibble in the bowls under the shrine, and found a second one!
After that, I decided to do some walking around to see if there were any others.
There was not, so I buried the two that I found.
I don’t even know what cat was pregnant. There is one – I believe a sibling to Peanut Butter cup – that we’ve not been able to get close to, but I’ve been able to confirm as female. I think she might be pregnant. She’s so fluffy, it’s hard to tell, but if she is, she still is, and the stillborns were not hers. No other cat that I know is female looked even remotely pregnant.
After the sad job of burying the babies, I made a point of checking things I normally would have in my morning rounds. I find my morning rounds to be very meditative and enjoyable.
It was, however, hot and muggy. As I write this, just past 4pm, we’re at 29C/84F with the humidex at 32C/90F, and we haven’t even reached our high of the day, yet.
Yesterday, when I saw no rain in the forecast, I wrote that I would have expected thunderstorms. Well, last night, I did hear thunder in the distance as storms passed us by. While I was driving to get my mother, there were storm warnings on the radio, including the possibility of golf ball sized hail! Our local forecast now says rain should be starting around 11 or 12 this evening, and continuing until about 2am. We are now also expected to have rain all day Monday. We’re supposed to cool down slightly over the next few days, then get hot again. For us, that means close to, or hotter than, 30C/86F.
The conditions are frustrating. The coolest part of the day is in the morning, but the humidity is so high, it’s too damp to do anything like mowing or weed trimming. I need to get the weed trimmer out to work on the log frame of the low raised bed, but the winter squash plants are getting so big and long, it’s going to be a challenge to do the work without damaging them. I should be able to temporarily fix them to the trellis netting for the peas and beans, though.
So the grass cutting and weed trimming needs to wait until things are no longer too wet – but by then, it’s too hot. The temperatures don’t start coming down until about 7pm – and if the heat doesn’t get us, the mosquitoes and horseflies will! Bug spray or not bug spray!
Bah. At least the garden is planted. If we’re expecting rain tonight, I might take a chance and plant some kohlrabi in the empty space where the Purple Caribe potatoes didn’t come up.
But not until things start to cool down.
Until then, I’ve got a couple of boxes to open up and see what’s inside!
The rain started last night and, while never particularly heavy, it continued through this morning, and we’re still getting the odd showers. It’s only 17C/63F out there and windy, making it feel like 12C/52F, according to my apps.
Overcast, damp and chilly…
… not a surprise that I woke up in pain and have been feeling ready to fall asleep all day.
Definitely not the sort of weather to take the transplants outside, never mind actually planting anything.
So it’s been an inside sort of day, and not a very productive one.
I think I counted 25 this morning! I did not see Broccoli or her kittens, nor did I hear anything when I left food in the old garden shed for them. Hopefully, they were just being very quiet, and have not been moved.
I’m rather concerned about Patience, Peanut Butter Cup’s brother outside. While their fur colours are very different, they look very much alike. PBC had problems with a leaky butt that has improved substantially. Patience, however, has suddenly gotten worse. His poor behind is looking quite unfortunately and messy. Whatever the problem is, it’s only affecting him and (previously) his sister. So we can rule out quite a few possible contagious causes. We’re already dosing their kibble with lysine. We’re not in a position to start dosing them with something like the Healthy Poops stuff that we’re giving the inside cats through their daily Cat Soup mixture. It’s not like we can isolate the one cat and treat him, right now, either.
Well, such is life with semi-feral cats, unfortunately. Hopefully, he will improve as time goes by.
In other things, my mother had her home care panel yesterday, and it went “well”.
Too “well.”
He went through one of the panel lists with us – about a dozen pages – and a few times, he simply handed it to me to read over and mark things off. This dealt with her physical challenges. He explained, before we started, how the “marking” system worked, and what was used to determined the level of care a person might need.
Before he arrived, my mother had made a list of concerns, as I suggested, that we went over together. I’m glad I showed up early to do that. My mother’s writing is a mix of Polish and English, usually with English words spelled phonetically Polish. Others… I’m honestly not sure how she’s deciding to spell things! Some of the things she wrote down, though, I just couldn’t figure out.
There are a few things she keeps trying to bring up with anyone she things is a medical professional of some sort, even when it’s not something they can answer – like asking the lab tech taking her blood about her urinary issues. This time, she was adding things like her burping. She complains about burping a lot, but as she talks more about it, she eventually says that she is having pains and making herself burp actually makes her feel better. After much questioning about the pain she’s feeling, she seemed to be talking about just below her solar plexus, but also about general chest pain. It is incredibly difficult to narrow things down because, no matter how many times we’ve tried to explain things to her, she cannot grasp basic anatomy.
While going over the list, there were things that, on their own, were not topics he could deal with, so we talked about what he was there for again, and the concerns she had, both physical and mental, that he could take into account.
Of course, once he was there, she found ways to talk about all sorts of things that were completely outside of his scope.
I’d also told her that this was the time to talk about her worst and most difficult days; the reasons why she doesn’t feel safe living where she is now.
When the time came, though, she – as always! – made light of the major things, and made a big deal out of the minor things!
I tried my best to keep her more honest, but he can only go by what she says and agrees to. So if she says she can cope with her knees, even though they are what puts her most at risk, he has to go with that. Meanwhile, she’ll start talking about waking up with a dry mouth at night as if it’s such a big deal, even though we’d already talked about how she’s probably just falling asleep with her mouth open. I tried to explain to her the difference between that, and having a medical condition that causes dry mouth, as they are VERY different, but she completely dismissed it.
In the end, he had a few things he could offer her from Home Care.
She rejected almost every one of them.
The only area she was willing to give in was for a commode to keep by her bedside, and you could see, it really was a “giving in”, not something she wanted. Frankly, I don’t know that she’ll even use it, but will keep using a bucket, instead. We’d already tried to loan her a commode, and she would not use it. Granted, one they provide would be a lot more comfortable and have hand rails. So we’ll see.
Among her concerns was how much harder it is for her to cook her meals or do her dishes, etc. because of her knees. She has to hang on to the counters, or use her cane, to get around her apartment. Meal prep was offered. One option was to have someone come to her home a couple of times a day to basically do a heat and eat, or prepare a soup and sandwich type thing. They only have 15 minutes, so they can’t cook a meal from scratch. Not something that would be very useful for her. The other was to have someone come every couple of weeks for 2 hours, and do a whole meal prep from scratch, with the complete meals left in her fridge and freezer to heat up as needed. That would have been very useful for her.
She turned it down, because she prefers to cook her own food – or use Meals on Wheels.
She actually had home care a few years back, as she was recovering from surgery. She hated it and was nasty to the home care worker. Back when I was a kid, she actually did home care for extra money every now and then, and she doesn’t understand that what she did, 40 years ago, is completely different from how it’s done now. Even the qualifications have changed. If today’s requirements existed back then, she could never have done any home care at all.
Basically, she wants help, but hates getting help, because it’s never “right” or good enough.
One of the things she brought up was moaning about how she’s probably going to need a wheelchair soon (she’s been saying that for a few years now). I reminded her, we have one waiting, if she needs it. It’s my late father’s wheelchair that was brought to her, but then she decided she didn’t need it, so I took it to store here until she decides otherwise. I mentioned that my brother tried to give her mobility scooters and even a powered chair (much smaller), and she started going on about how they are so jerky to drive, and they have batteries. I had to explain that she’s a bit paranoid about batteries, but was unable to elaborate.
When talking about the wheelchair, though, I remembered to point out that she might not be able to use a manual chair. She might not have the arm strength for it, anymore. Operating a manual wheelchair is hard work!
By the end of it, it was obvious she didn’t “need” the long term care situation she wants to move to. The guy even expressed frustration early on, as many doctors have no idea what the approval process for LTC is, and just assume if they say a patient needs it, they’ll get it. There are so many people on the waiting lists for LTC, only the most severe cases actually get in.
There are, however, other options.
We’d been talking about Assisted Living for my mother, which is a step below LTC, however there is another step that’s basically between places like where my mother is now, and Assisted Living, called Supportive Housing. (In other provinces I’ve lived in, Assisted Living and Supportive Housing was pretty much different names for the same thing.)
There are very few such places, though. He named a few towns and the city, none of which are places my mother wants to live in.
There is, however, one in the town my brother lives in.
He suggested we look into it as somewhere my mother can go. I looked it up later, and the place is just a few years old. The building is split between Supportive Housing and 55+ Independent Living, which is sort of like what my mother is in now, but with better amenities. My brother and his wife will check it out, when they have the chance, because their website really kinda sucks. 😄
There were quite a few things, however, I needed to tell him that couldn’t be talked about in front of my mother, so when we were done, I walked him out to his vehicle. As we were passing through the lobby, there was a folded up wheelchair available for residents, and I told him that’s much like the one we have that my mother would be using. He told me he was glad I caught on that she might not have the arm strength to operate a manual wheelchair anymore. That’s not something they typically have to consider, since anyone at that stage would be using a motorized wheelchair – which my mother doesn’t want.
Once at the relative privacy by his vehicle, we chatted for a while. I clarified a few things for him, but there was so much, I missed a few others I wanted to bring up, but forgot about until later.
With some of them, he asked if the geriatric care nurse that had done the cognitive assessments was told about. With some, I couldn’t remember but, with others, I know I did discuss them with her. This was also where I mentioned the situation with our vandal, which is also relevant, but from the cognitive function area, not physical mobility and self care, which is his area. With things like her physical condition being worse than she made it out to be, there was really nothing he could do. If she says she’s good, he has to accept it. Her cognitive impairment isn’t severe enough to override that for her own safety.
So… my mother sabotaged herself again.
He is going to follow up with the person who did the cognitive assessments, though.
The other thing he’s going to arrange is for an Occupational Therapist to come in. If there are any changes that should be made to her apartment, they can make recommendations. This sort of assessment, done for my late father, is why this house has arm bars and hand rails, everywhere, and why we still have his bath transfer chair, should my husband’s bath chair no longer be enough.
I think my mother should really be using a hospital bed – especially with her concerns about breathing. Maybe if the OT suggests it, she’ll finally accept? She really ought to be sleeping more upright, for her breathing issues, and have a bed that is lower to the floor to make it easier for her to get in and out of. When I bring it up, though, she says she “doesn’t want to bother anybody”.
Which reminds me… I did bring up that a lot of the health complains she makes – the minor ones, not the serious ones she makes light of – are clearly more about her wanting attention. A better way to describe it, though, would have been that it’s about control, too, but I didn’t think of that until just now.
Oh, I also remembered to talk to him about mental health. At some point, she did have a diagnosis, but we don’t know what it was. My brother had tried to track down her old health records, with no success. When we first moved here and I was packing up the stuff in my mother’s dresser, I found a full box of pills prescribed to her. The doctor that prescribed them passed away quite a few years ago. When I looked up the medication, one of the things it’s usually prescribed for is manic depression (now called bi-polar disorder, I believe), but that may not have been her diagnosis at the time. She has a very long history of simply stopping medications she’d been given, or not taking them at all. I told him I believe she may be paranoid schizophrenic; she’s a textbook example of that, and I told him about some of the things I remembered her doing when I was a kid. This is not a new thing. It’s just getting worse as she gets older.
As we were talking, he gave me a copy of another assessment he had – this one is “only ” six pages long – that we didn’t cover. It’s a Behavioral Assessment. When I was able to go over it, I realized we really needed to have done this one – but there was no way we could have done it with her! She is not aware that these behaviours of hers are a problem, and feels entitled and justified to act that way. As I went over some of the questions, my first thought might be “no, she doesn’t really do that”. Then I’d read the examples and realize, yes, she does this. A lot! But these are things she doesn’t usually do when she’s alone at home. She does them when she’s with us.
I was able to talk to my brother about the home care assessment, yesterday evening. With some of the stuff, my brother has more information than I do. I sent him images of the Behavioral Assessment, and he was going to try calling the home care guy some time today, in between meetings. Hopefully, they’ll be able to connect.
So that’s were we’re at now.
In limbo, really.
My mother’s just on the edge of qualifying for the level of care she’s asking for, but not quite there yet. At least when it comes to the stuff we talked about at the time. If we’d been able to do the other assessment, it probably would have made the difference.
Still, even if we can just get her into Supportive Housing, it’s a foot in the door, and there would be trained people seeing her every day that could make determinations, as to whether she needs more help than they can give her. Once she’s on that path, it’ll be easier to get her the next step up, compared to where she is living now.
One thing about the place he recommended. If she moves there, I will become the one living furthest away from her. There would mean no more errands, or driving her to medical appointments, from me.
It would be back on my brother, as he would be the closest to her – and she has been so horrible towards him! If she’s living in the same town as him (they don’t actually live in the town, but on an acreage), she would expect him to be waiting on her, hand and foot.
Before I get into how things went, I want to share some adorable news. While checking in the old garden shed while Broccoli was eating at the other side of the hose, I found both kittens, curled up together on a grow bag next to their cat bed. I was able to pick both of them up and cuddle them! The black and white male hissed at me a bit. The calico mostly just started at me. Neither tried to run away. The calico’s eyes are changing colour! The black and white still has very blue eyes.
I straightened out the cat bed and set them in it, before leaving some kibble for Broccoli just inside the door. I’d already left some in a sheltered spot outside the shed, and when I closed the door, I found her there, munching away. Happily, she is tolerating my visits to her babies, and not hiding them.
One of my goals for the day was to plant some summer squash in the pots we’ve got outside the main doors into the house. I got some seeds scarified and presoaking while I did my morning rounds, then planted them after I had breakfast. While checking the garden beds, I noticed the one available chimney block planter at the chain link fence and decided to plant in there, too.
In the pots, I decided on white patty pans (a new one for us), green Endeavor zucchini, and yes, I found a package of Magda seeds! I’d ordered a variety pack of summer squash years ago, and accidentally ordered three instead of one – and those extra seeds are coming in handy! The chimney block planter got Goldy zucchini. Hopefully, we’ll have space to plant out more summer squash in other places, but for now, we at least have these in. I had to add sticks around where the seeds were planted, to make sure no cats lay on them!
Then I found cats lying on my onions that were transplanted! I remembered I had a packages of disposable plastic utensils in the old kitchen, so I stuck those in among the onions. I don’t know that they’ll all survive being squashed flat by cat butts, but at least now they have a chance!
One of my other goals for today was to start transplanting into one of the shifted beds in the main garden area, with or without a frame. My daughter, however, figured we should be able to drag that second log out of the spruce grove today. So that’s what we started on.
Since she debranched it and cut it to length, all the space she cleared around it has grown back! The mosquitoes in there were brutal, too.
Dragging it out was a pain. We used a rope to heave it forward a few feet, then I’d go to the other and and swing it around a foot or so, we’d drag it forward some more, then back to swinging the other end around, until we finally cleared some trees and had a straight line out of the spruce grove. Even then, we had to make our way between a narrow space between trees at the edge of the grove. It was a bit easier to drag once we were clear of the spruce grove, but an 18′ log is pretty heavy!
Oh, wow. I just used a log weight calculator. I don’t know the exact dimensions for the calculator, but at the lowest estimate, it would be 210 pounds/95kg. At the largest estimate, 337 pounds/152kg. I would guess it’s actually closer to about 250 pounds/113kg.
I don’t feel so bad, now.
Earlier in the morning, I’d taken out the weed trimmer and trimmed where I would be working around the beds, as close to the ground as I could. I also trimmed around the logs that were already by the raised beds – the grass and dandelions were so tall, you could barely see them!
After the log was dragged out, my daughter wanted to start mowing part of the lawn. It’s still damp, but it really needs to be done! She started on a section in front of the house that did not get mowed at all this year, around where the kibble and cat shelters are. It’s one of the densest sections of lawn we’ve got. She started off with the mower set high, then tried to go over the densest spot with it set lower, but the grass is so wet, the lawnmower kept clogging! She was collecting the grass clippings, which means she was stopping and starting often, to empty the bag. After a while, the lawnmower just wouldn’t start anymore. She switched to using the weed trimmer around the edges for a while, as we left the mower in the shade. After maybe half an hour, it started again. When it happened again, my daughter just stopped for the day. She was so hot and tired by then, she couldn’t even grip the pull cord anymore!
While she did that, I worked on the logs.
One of the first things to do was go over all of them with the baby chainsaw (cordless pruner) to cut away all the sticky-outy bits. Stubs of branches, lumps in the wood, etc. I did the 18′ lengths first, then the 4′ lengths. Being able to set the 4′ lengths across the long logs made it a lot easier! Once the bits were trimmed off, I broke out the draw knife and debarked the 4′ lengths. When we built our first high raised bed out of logs, I didn’t bother debarking them, as it was an experiment. What I’ve since found is that ants just LOVE to build nests in the logs, between the bark and the wood! Insects, in general, like to get in there, and of course, moisture collects between the layers, too. These logs have been out in the elements long enough that things were already getting in between the layers. After everything is set up, I’ll be making sure to use the jet setting on the hose to pressure wash the logs!
Once the bark was clear, it was back to removing sticky-outy bits again, that had been hidden in the bark.
Once the 4′ end pieces were done, I moved the marking posts with the twine on them over, then brought the short logs close to where they will be assembled. Then I worked on one of the 18′ logs. That was made easier by setting the ends on other logs, including a pile of them still mostly buried in the grass. These smaller logs will be the upright supports for the trellises, once the trellis beds are assembled. For now, though, they provide a surface I can use to roll a big log around, while debarking it!
By the time I got the first 18′ length debarked, I was totally hooped. We were at 17C/63F, with a humidex of 20/68F, and I was working in full sun. It felt a lot hotter than that, to me! It was time to stop for sustenance and hydration. I think I might still make it out this evening, but I’m not sure, yet, if I’ll get back to the logs. I might do some other transplanting, first. For now, though, even if we just get the 18′ lengths in position, the soil inside can be spread out, and some of the winter squash can be transplanted. The 4′ ends can be permanently attached, later. So finishing the second 18′ log is a priority, but I’ll see how I feel physically, first. I don’t need to go to my mother’s tomorrow until the afternoon, so I can hopefully do some transplanting in the morning, but I definitely won’t be working with the logs in the morning, when I have to leave for my mother’s!
I did get a bit of an update about her. I haven’t talked to her since she hung up on me yesterday, when she was trying to convince me her pills are all wrong. My brother spoke to her, and he mentioned he’d heard she hung up on me. She started going on about how her pills are all mixed up, and he basically repeated the same things I did, adding that the pharmacist knows which is which, and makes sure they are in the right places in her bubble packs. She ended up changing the subject. She told him she hadn’t gone to church today, because she wasn’t feeling good (no idea why) then asked if he went to church today. He reminded her, they go to their church on Saturdays (she’s said to me a few times that she doesn’t think they go to church anymore. I remind her that they go on Saturdays, but she doesn’t believe me!). Then he mentioned this Saturday was particularly special, as they attended the funeral of a dear friend’s mother. My SIL sang during the service, while my brother played the guitar.
To which my mother lamented that my SIL cares more about taking care of her friends, than taking care of my mother…
My poor brother. He told me, he was absolutely speechless when she said that. He couldn’t think of what to say at all, so he told her he had to get back to working on their sump pump, and said goodbye.
When he told me about this, I remembered telling my mother about this upcoming funeral, and that my SIL was asked to sing, and her response then was the same. My SIL takes better care of her friends that of my mother.
Oh, I think I know why. My mother has been obsessed about her own funeral, and giving us instructions on what she wants us to do. She had brought up my SIL singing at her funeral. My SIL almost never talks to my mother anymore, and doesn’t come out when my brother does. Too many years of being told she wasn’t “real” family, just my brother’s wife, and my mother being horribly cruel to her, when my SIL has never been anything but kind to my mother.
My brother and his wife are such amazing people. They deserve so much better than how my mother treats them!
Ah, well.
Tomorrow, she has her home care panel. One more step in the process for her to go into long term care. I’m just really thankful that this is something she actually wants, and not something we have to figure out how to do around her!
I’m taking a hydration break, then we’ll be doing a dump run and an errand run into town, so I figured I should make a progress post before we head out.
Yesterday’s fast passing thunderstorm didn’t give us enough rain to saturate the cardboard on the bed I worked on, yesterday. I used a hose on the cardboard, but I’m not too concerned about getting it really saturated before adding the soil. That spot doesn’t have standing water right now, but it is very wet. Once the weight of the soil is on the cardboard, and it is compressed against the wet soil below, it will get saturated quite quickly on its own.
The first thing I needed to do was push my way through the jungle to get to the pile of garden soil. This is the first time it’s been uncovered this year. It’s amazing how much can grow under that … landscape cloth? I salvaged from around the old wood pile, years ago.
The soil was so full of crab grass rhizomes, I actually had to sort of pre-sift the soil with my hands and pull out as many roots as I could, just so I could shovel it onto the sifter over the wheelbarrow! I didn’t fill the wheelbarrow as much as I normally would, as I wanted room to mix in the sulfur granules. I broke open the second package for the first time, so we’ll be able to compare with the other beds, if there’s any difference in how well they help acidify our alkaline soil.
With the smaller loads, it meant more trips. I think was five or six loads? I lost track I made the bed deeper in the middle than the sides, since it’s going to have large squash plants in it.
Then I stopped for a cool down and hydration break. According to my weather app, it’s 17C/63F out there, with a “feels like” of 16C/61F
It felt way hotter than that, to me!
Before I get back to it, my daughter and I will be doing a dump run, then a trip into town. She and her sister have some of their own shopping to do.
Once I get back at it. I’ll be transplanting the three Crespo squash into the new bed. I’ve decided that, since I have to put something around them to protect them from deer, I will take advantage of that. I will plant pole or climbing seed beans along two sides and the barrier will be their trellis. The deer do eat bean plants as well, but if I put the netting on right, that won’t happen until the plants are much larger and better able to survive such an onslaught.
In theory, I could do a “three sisters” type thing, but the idea of planting just a few corn in the middle of the squash seems useless to me. If we’re going to plant corn, it’s going to be a much larger amount!
Anyhow, I’ll take a look at the bean seeds I have and decide if I want to do pole beans for fresh eating, or seed beans that will be left alone until fall to harvest. I’m leaning more towards fresh eating, since we’ve got so little of that started right now!
The first week of June is already done, and I’ve done none of the “after last frost date” direct sowing, yet! Okay, okay. It’s only 6 days since our last frost date, and we’ve been known to have frost even later, but it just feels like time is slipping through my fingers, with all the delays and interruptions.
Ah, well. We’ll get in what we can, and make do with what we have!
Then, just to make things even more frustrating, I got a phone call from my mother while I was writing this. When I asked how she was doing, she started going on about her pills, and my first thought was that she was going to ask me to take her to the hospital for some reason. As she kept talking in circles, I had to stop her and tell her to get to her point (I was just too hot and too tired to follow her when she gets like this). She didn’t aske me to take her to the hospital. Instead, she started talking about how she took all her pills – it sounded like she was saying she took all her pills at once! – and then about the one she was not supposed to take anymore…
I eventually was able to get her to explain to me that she had been going through her pills yesterday evening, and comparing them to her old, leftover pills that she never throws away, and comparing them to each other, and she has decided that white round pills in the morning (her water pills) and the round white pills in the evening (blood thinners, if I remember correctly) were the same pills, because they also both have the number 20 on them. I explained to her that the number is for the pharmacist to know what the dose is, not what kind of pill it is. She said, they’re mixed up. I said no, that’s why they’re in the bubble packs. So they don’t get mixed up. Don’t take them out of the bubble packs, so they don’t get mixed up!
She hung up on me.
So my mother has decided her pills are “wrong”. The one I identified for her as the water pills are not really her water pills.
She is absolutely determined to mess herself up, and convinced that others are deliberately giving her the wrong medications or telling her the wrong things, because they are hiding things from her.
This is not the first time we’ve had these issues. It’s just getting worse, as she gets older.
I ended up sending an email to my siblings to update her. Then I called the guy at home care and left a message about what’s going on, and what she’s doing to herself, because there’s no way we’d be able to talk about this during his meeting with her. That would really set her paranoia off!
Hopefully, between my siblings and I, we’ll be able to convince her to take her medications as directed.
Now that I think about it, my mother probably took her pills out of their bubble packs so she can see them more closely, and now can’t tell the white round pills apart. If she only did that for one day, that wouldn’t be too bad, but who knows, at this point.
*sigh*
I wish I could say this is a new thing showing up with her cognitive decline but, to be honest, she’s always done this. It’s just getting worse as she gets older.
I admit, I was shorter with her than usual. I was hot and tired and just didn’t have the ability to follow her along when she starts talking in circles like that. I really think a big part of it is, she wants us to be paying attention to her, and to jump when she says jump. There is very much a control element involved. Again, not a new thing, but at this stage, it’s far more disruptive, and far more potentially harmful to herself.
I’m glad that she actually wants to go into a nursing home, and asked for the process to be started. Her reasons why may be about her physical limitations, but I really think it’s her cognitive issues that are the more urgent safety concerns right now.
Well, we’ll see how things go when the home care panel is done on Monday. Hopefully, she’ll get in for that required brain MRI soon – or that it is not something that would delay any decisions to get her into long term care.
The Re-Farmer 