dealing with elderly parents

Our 2026 Garden: one more bed prepped, and got a visit in

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The temperatures continued to climb today.

I started things off a bit early, and it was still lovely and cool. My priority, after I did my morning rounds, was to water the garden beds before the heat hit.

I’m happy to say that I am seeing new sprouts in the rows of spinach, chard, turnips and radish in the main garden area. I checked under the boards in the trellis bed and saw what might be carrot sprouts, so I removed the boards. It’s hard to say for sure, as a lot of weeds were trying to come up under there, too.

I’m pretty sure I saw new sprouts in the cabbage and kohlrabi beds, too. I’m pretty sure I’m seeing tiny bok choy and beet seedlings through the mosquito netting, thought it’s hard to be sure. I didn’t see any this morning, but this evening, I’m sure I could see the first dwarf pea sprouts!

After I finished outside, I came in and had breakfast, then tried to go down for a nap before I planned to visit my mother, then pick up anything we needed before doing our first stock up shop, tomorrow.

It was a failure.

For some reason, both Butterscotch and Cheddar have decided that, when I lie down, they absolutely MUST cuddle my head. Aggressively. Then curling up right at my head to nap themselves.

That doesn’t count the other cats that like to settle on my hip, against my back or on either side of my legs.

*sigh*

Next time, I’ll try napping on the couch. The living room is a cat free zone.

I eventually gave up and got ready to head into town. Before I did, I noted activity notification on my bank app and checked.

My husband’s tax return, which is supposed to include my first Disability Tax Credit, came in.

It was short by about $2500.

Unfortunately, my husband still can’t log into his CRA account to see why. I’m going to have to wait until our tax prepared is back from holidays at the end of the month and phone her, because she can log in and see his account – and maybe find out why he can’t log in, himself. anymore!

My younger daughter never got her disability tax credit, either. She did her taxes herself.

Frustrating.

Anyhow.

I headed into town and realized my mother would be just starting her lunch, so I decided to go to the grocery store, first. I actually picked up some ground beef that was on sale. I haven’t seen ground beef for under $6 a pound for a long time, even with sales.

My visit with my mother was pretty good. As I was headed to her room, I spotted her in the dining room and popped in. We then went to her room for the visit.

She is so enjoying having a room – and a bathroom – to herself! She says being in the nursing home, compared to the TCU, is like night and day.

Of course, she still had things to complain about. With her medications, as usual. Apparently someone tried to give her her breakfast meds and supper meds at the same time? Then the count for her morning meds was off. She said she asked who was in charge of the medications and was told it was the pharmacy in town. I suspect the person didn’t understand what my mother was asking, but she now believes the pharmacy decides what medications she gets, at their whim. She then started going on about how the staff all think she is stupid, and everyone living there is stupid, and that’s why they are deliberately messing with their medications.

*sigh*

She had asked my brother for a radio and he’d given me one to pass on to her. I plugged it in and tried to find the station she told me the number of. There was nothing on either AM or FM (she didn’t know which is was; she doesn’t understand anything about AM or FM). Since I couldn’t pick up her station (though I could pick up others), she decided it was a bad radio and started asking me if an old radio that belonged to my husband when we were in high school – a ghetto blaster, which tells you just how old it is! – was still around. It is, but I told her, it still won’t pick up that station. I tried to explain again about things interfering with frequencies, but she decided it meant that the radio stations were the problem, for having “weak” signals.

Then I tried to show her the sliding switch that goes from off to FM then AM. She demanded “just show me what button to push”. I told her, it’s not a button. It’s a switch that slides, and showed her again; Off – FM – AM.

She got angry that my brother would give her a high tech radio that she can’t understand.

*sigh*

It was a shorter visit, since there really wasn’t much we had to talk about. Now that she is in town, I can visit her more often, anyhow. Before I left, I spent some time at the nursing station. I explained what my mother told me about the medications, and that someone tried to give her her breakfast meds and supper meds at the same time. She was startled to hear that and said she would look into it. She got out the medication binder and looked up my mother’s file, going over everything, which is basically the same that it was while she was at the TCU. She said they tried looking at my mother’s list to compare (the hand written one she makes after she counts her pills, with little diagrams), but it was in Polish, so they were trying to translate it. My mother had been promised a list of her medications and they were going to try to get it translated into Polish for her, too. I told her, my mother knows pre-WWII Polish; she would not be familiar with modern medical terms in today’s Polish!

As we were chatting, the nurse told me how so many of the staff were startled when my mother was transferred over. Many of them had cared for Baba – “grandmother” – which is what they called my aunt. My mother looks SO much like her sister did. My aunt passed away a few years ago, so for the staff to suddenly start seeing their Baba again was a bit of a shock until they found out they were sisters.

This nurse had just started working there when my father came to live there. I’ve had it confirmed that he was there for only 5 months before he passed away; I thought it was 6 months. She remembered my father, and I told her about how, when I phoned him every Sunday, he would go on and on about how great they were treating him, how well taken care of he was, and how much he liked the staff. She was so touched to hear that!

So far, my mother has been very nice to them. I hope that lasts! She has been saving the nasty comments about the staff for when we are there. 😕

It was a good chat with the nurse, and I expect we will have many more opportunities to talk now that my mother is there!

That done, I headed home, then stayed indoors to stay out of the heat. Unfortunately, it just kept getting hotter. I finally headed out at around 6:30, which is about when we hit 27C/81F.

The predicted high was 25C/77F.

We’re supposed to keep getting hotter, with the hottest day in the forecast being Friday, which they are now saying is supposed to hit 34C/93F.

The yard cats are laying in puddles all over the yard, in whatever shade they can find.

Bobert was looking adorable in the cat bed I tucked under the isolation shelter’s door box, to keep the weather out in the winter.

With the heat, I made sure to do the watering again. This time, I did watering in the food forest area.

I’m happy to say that it looks like the apple tree survived, in spite of the damage to the stem. A single branch with new leaf buds has shown up. The plum tree also has leaf buds showing up finally, but only in branches coming up just above the graft at the base. None of last year’s growth is showing buds. Neither are the mulberry trees. They survived their first winter, but it looks like they didn’t survive their second. The poor little highbush cranberry have free leaves showing, but they are still remarkably tiny, including the one that the deer did NOT nibble one. The silver buffalo berry bushes, which I don’t bother watering because there are too many, had been covered with what I thought were leave buds. It turns out they were not leaf buds, but flower buds! The leaf buds are showing up now. The sea buckthorn also have leaf buds unfurling.

After the watering was done, I started working on the larger of the two East yard beds that had not been prepped in the fall.

I first removed the two lengths of twine that went around the sides. Those were there to keep anything wrapped around the box frame from flapping in the wind too much, but they were in the way for working in the bed. I considered taking the box frame off entirely, but decided it wasn’t necessary and worked around it.

In the second picture, you can see the cleaned up bed. Unfortunately, while I was leveling the cleared soil with the hoe, I caught the line running across that helped keep the sides from bowing outwards at the joins. The wood is rotting and the screw eye got pulled right out!

Honestly, I’m surprised these beds have lasted as long as they have. I used lumber I found in the barn that had been sitting there for probably at least a decade before I found them. They were not in particularly good shape, but they were the best I could find for the job. I expected them to last about 3 years, maybe, and they’ve lasted twice that by now.

Weeding the bed didn’t really take that much, except that I found a remarkable amount of tree roots! Given where this bed is located, they would not be from the elm tree, but from the nearby cherry bushes.

I look forward to when we can make these into high raised beds. These beds are about a foot high, but it was still really painful to be bending to work in it.

Once the bed was clear, I took some plastic that was rolled up and set aside from previous uses in these beds and covered the soil to protect it from cats, until we can plant in it. I’m looking to transplant tomatoes into this bed. We have four varieties to transplant, and couple probably fit three varieties in this bed. We don’t have a lot of each variety.

The pieces of wood frame on the left of the first photo are on the 4′ square bed that also needs to be done. By the time I finished the longer bed, I was too hot and in too much pain to do that one. Aside from weeding it – and that one has been infected by creeping Charlie – I will be adding the additional wood frame pieces to make it a bit higher, and can then add more soil into it. I’m planning to put the eggplant in here. It’s a small enough bed that I can add plastic walls around it, to protect them from high winds and create a semi-greenhouse around them.

I don’t know how much I’ll be able to get done over the next few days. I’ll be doing our city stock up trips and a vet trip in between. Shopping always drains me, so it will depend on how much energy I have left – and what my pain levels are at. At the very least, I plan to water everything in the morning, and again in the evening, because of the heat.

Once the city trips are done, I expect to be able to start the direct sowing, and then hopefully start transplanting soon after. Somewhere in there, I’ll be uncovering and reclaiming the area to plant our corn in.

A lot to do in a very short time!

The Re-Farmer

Today was a mixed bag…

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There was good stuff and sad stuff.

It was a very early day for me, mostly because once I woke up at around 4am, I wasn’t able to fall back asleep. I finally have up well before my 5:30 alarm.

We expected to need a lot of time to get Furriosa and Bug – we knew we wouldn’t be able to get Marta – into carriers, so my daughter and I were out shortly after 6. Since she has had better luck making contact with them, I held the carrier while she tried to get them.

Bug turned out to be really easy to get. First try, even!

Furriosa took a bit longer, but my daughter was finally able to grab her by the scruff of her neck and quickly sneak her into the carrier.

It was done so quickly, I had plenty of time before I planned to leave for the vet! I still brought the truck over and opened the gate, while my daughter did the outside cat feeding, then we made sure the carriers were secure in the sun room before going inside for a while.

I headed out shortly after 7, shooting for an 8am drop off, though I’d been told 9am. The clinic opens at 8 and it takes a while to process, so I prefer to be early. Once the carriers were in the truck and no longer being moved around, Bug and Furriosa settled right in. I had Furriosa on the passanger seat, with the door facing me, and she watched me for the entire drive!

I wasn’t the only one to get there just before the clinic opened. We didn’t have long to wait.

When it was my turn to get them checked in, the receptionist was able to find both Bug and Furriosa still in their system from when we tried to get them spayed before. I mentioned that they might be pregnant so, even if though they were still small, they really needed to get done. Neither would survive a pregnancy. Being yard cats, we also went on the assumption they have ear mites and worms. She double checked what the rescue would cover and it was basically just ear mites, but they planned to use ivermectin, which can also have a deworming effect.

I made sure to tell them that I had a long drive and would be hanging around town until they called me, and she said they would try to get them done as quickly as possible.

I then spent the next while going to the Dollarama and the Walmart, picking up a few things, then trying to nap in the truck.

That didn’t work.

I had updated the people in the rescue chat group earlier, and they had some questions. Then I started getting messages from my brother and SIL. My brother was able to get the day off, so they could go to my mother at the TCU and help things ready for her transfer to the nursing home. For some reason, the staff thought I was given the list of my mother’s medications, which they hadn’t. As my mother’s PoA, my brother had paperwork to sign and take care of on her behalf. Then they waited until the Handi Van came to pick her up.

After I while, I gave up trying to nap and went across to the Canadian Tire. I needed another quick connect hose repair kit, but I couldn’t remember if I needed the male or female connector. Not that the packages say that any more. They have “tap end” and “accessory end” or some such. I also got a new multi function spray nozzle. I had one I really liked that I used last year, but when I set it up this year, I found it was leaking in between sections of the handle.

In this one, the handle is all one metal piece.

The greenhouse portion of their garden centre was open, so I looked around. There were a few things that interested me, including some berry bushes, but today was not a day to pick them up. I still need to mark out and prepare for the basket willow that are in the process of being shipped. There is also a Manchurian Walnut, which will be planted in a completely different location from the willow. I have a tracking number, as a shipping label has been created, but the won’t actually be in the mail until Monday. I need to prepare for those before I start thinking of getting more trees or bushes!

By the time I was done at Canadian Tire, it was past lunch time, and I ended up going back to Walmart, just to walk around and look at things indoors, out of the heat. Past 1pm, I finally decided to just go to the clinic and see.

When I got there, I asked to find out what the status was and she got the names to look them up. She told me, they were just about to call me, and that the vet wanted to discuss the care routine, first.

That part is typical. What wasn’t typical is when a tech came back and told me to go to one of the examination rooms and the vet would come and talk to me.

Usually, they just give us the print out and, if there is anything extra, talk to me in the waiting area near the reception desk.

I’ve been in this room before. This is where we spent our last moments with our elderly Freya. This room has its own private exit, so people don’t have to go through the waiting room to leave. This is also where the vet talked to us about Bug, Furriosa and Domino when we brought them in for spay, and we were told they were too small. So it was obvious, there was something going on.

When the vet came, she told me that things went well with Bug.

Then she told me she made the decision to euthanize Furriosa.

It turns out she was in very bad condition. Being so fluffy, we couldn’t see that she was basically skin and bones. She had gained no weight since we tried to spay her before. She said Furriosa’s teeth were badly broken (!!!???!!!) and she had skin issues. All things we couldn’t see because we couldn’t handle her. The vet knew that they were colony cats, so she understood we couldn’t have known. She suspected there might have been liver problems. She said, we could have gone through much testing and diagnosis and what would likely be extensive treatment, but she felt that Furriosa’s condition was just too poor to put her through that.

*sigh*

She did ask if anyone had explained about the possibility of euthanasia, and I said yes. It wasn’t done this time, but we’ve brought in so many cats by now, we are well aware of the risks.

As for Bug, the vet she had diarrhea and needed to be cleaned up before they could do the spay. She’s very small for her age and, while she was treated for ear mites, she decided to send home a deworming pill (half pill, actually) into her, tomorrow. We’ll put it with some wet cat food or a squeeze treat and get her to eat it that way.

After the vet filled me in, I was sent back to reception to wait while someone brought Bug and the carrier Furriosa had come in. I hadn’t brought a donation towards this, as was done last time but, when I found out how much the pill cost, I was at least able to cover that. Aside from arrangements with rescues, this clinic also accepts donations specific to spays and neuters – the two receptionists talked about transferring from the donation account to cover today’s spay. They also had a container of what I at first through were lapel pins that were going for a recommended $1 donation each. The backs were odd, so I had to ask what they were.

They were decorations for Crocs.

My daughters both have knock-off Crocs.

I had some toonies, so I got four of them. Every little bit will help someone else in our position to get spays and neuters done.

We are booked to come back next week with Misha and Marta – if we can get them into carriers!!

While that was happening, Bug and the empty carrier were brought out and I got my printouts with care instructions. Once in the truck, I quickly updated the rescue group and the family, then got caught up on messages about my mother’s transfer – she had arrived by then – before heading home.

Bug started at me through the carrier door, completely silent, for the trip.

I pulled up to the house and my daughter came out to help me get Bug into the isolation shelter. Which went very quickly. Once the carrier door was open, she ran right into the shelter, then went straight for the food bowl! There was still some softened kibble from the morning cat soup she could safely eat.

Then we unloaded the truck and my daughter parked it while I put things away, then got on my computer to properly update everyone and catch up on message.

I really dislike using a touch screen for messaging.

I hadn’t eaten lunch and it was well past three by then, so my daughter was a sweetheart and took care of feeding the outside cats while I made myself some food. She said she got to give Bug all sorts of scrubs!

We’re all saddened about Furriosa, but in the end, it’s better that it worked out this way. Otherwise, she would have just stayed sick outside until she disappeared, and we wouldn’t have known what was going on.

This picture was of her watching me in the truck, just before I started driving to the vet.

Poor little thing.

After I finished eating and getting more updates about my mother – and a glowing report on how much better the nursing home is, compared to the TCU, from my SIL – I headed outside. We had a hot day and I wanted to get some watering done, as well as take care of things with what I picked up. We might still get rain tonight, but even with all the rain we already had, the beds were baking.

Before I started the watering, I got out the box of larger safety pins I’d picked up and secured the mosquito netting better to the wire of the raised bed cover.

This is why I wanted to make sure it was very secure.

That cats so lover to use that mosquito netting as a hammock!

That done, I went to the hose that was missing its end (I got the wrong connector for it last year, but didn’t realize it until after I’d cut off the damage end). I set that hose up in the rain barrel bout by the plum, gooseberry, apple and haskap row, and added one more length of hose to the back tap. Now the main part of the hose is long enough to reach up to the rain barrel hose for a quick connect. I watered the main garden beds – I really like the new sprayer! – first, then set up the hose to the rain barrel. While that was filling, I used a watering can to water the sea buckthorn, highbush cranberry and mulberry, before doing the row by the barrel. The barrel is between the gooseberry and the apply tree. Neither the apple nor the plum are showing leaf buds year. Nor is the mulberry.

I think I found out why, with the apple.

Only visible from one side, I found critter damage.

*sigh*

The damage is all on one side, so I’m hopping the rest of it is enough to keep it going.

By the time the watering was done, the barrel was mostly full. This barrel leaks, and I am taking advantage of that. It will slowly drain between the gooseberry and the apple and, with about 30-35 gallons of water in there, will probably benefit the plum and at least one haskap, too.

After switching the hose back to the spray nozzle and returning it to the main garden area, I worked on the old kitchen garden, watering it and the east garden beds of kohlrabi and cabbage, from the nice and full rain barrel. Ambient temperature rain water is much preferable to our very cold well water.

With that done, I still had enough energy to put the end walls on the chain link fence raised bed. Being barley 2 feet wide, I wove the skinny, still flexible, maple and poplar I’d gathered last fall, wattle weave style, trimming them with pruning sheers.

They look so much better than the deadwood walls! 😄 I’ll continue working on the front wall once I sharpen points onto the stakes, but at the moment, that might be a few days.

So that has been my day today. It was mostly good stuff. Getting both cats into the carrier and to the vet. Bug getting spayed, thanks to help from the rescue. My mother finally in a nursing home of her choice – the staff remember her sister, and some of them remember my late father, too! – while my brother and SIL could be there to help out and take care of the paperwork. Being able to get a few things I needed while out today, and getting at least a bit of work in the garden.

The only sad thing is not being able to bring Furriosa home. We couldn’t even be with her at the end. I know the vet took good care of her, though. It was the same vet that took care of our Freya.

Tomorrow, I’m hoping to get to my mother’s in the morning with the stuff in the truck that I’d taken from her room at the TCU. None of it is essential stuff, but I need it out of my truck. Tomorrow is Saturday and the dump is open longer hours. I need to finally get my mother’s old mattress and boxspring, which have been hanging out against a wall in the garage since January, to the dump!

I don’t know how much I’ll get done outside, though. We’re supposed to have rain from 2am to 2pm, so we’ll see how it goes.

Now that spring has finally arrive, things should be getting busy outside, but the rain is limiting what I can get done!

I’m not complaining, though. We need the rain.

So that’s where we’re at now.

With only a few hours of sleep last night, I am so very exhausted right now!

The Re-Farmer

Good news!

/ Re-Farmer / 4 Comments

Today has turned out to be a dreary day with rain on and off all night and continuing on through today.

Translation: I feel like I’m about to fall asleep at my keyboard right now.

The ground is way too saturated for the work I hoped to do outside today, but I can’t complain.

First good news.

I got Bug!

She had come into the sun room to eat kibble and was hungry enough that she didn’t run off when I came near. I grabbed the bowl of cat soup for the isolation cats and saw her still there, so I snuck a pet on her back.

She looked at me, then went back to eating.

I gave her neck scritches.

She kept eating.

So I picked her up.

She wasn’t too happy with that, but I had the bowl of warm cat soup, so I basically stuck it under her face and started walking. Every time she made like she was going to escape, I moved the food closer. She didn’t try to eat it while I held her, but it did seem to calm her down.

Once at the isolation shelter, she allowed me to put her in! I took out the food bowl inside and closed the window before she could make a run for it.

After taking out the leftover cat soup from last night, which the other cats pounce on immediately, I refilled it with fresh cat soup and set it back in.

Curtis was very interested in getting into the shelter and I ended up letting him in, too.

I did a quick check around the yard and, thinking of the raccoon I saw in the garden shed, decided to check and see if it was still there.

Yes, SHE was.

Turn your volume up a bit for this one.

There’s a litter of baby raccoons under that ball of fur. At the start of the video, you can hear the extra chittering from the babies.

Hmm… I just realized that Instagram shortened an 11 second video into something barely a second long – but I’m also getting “we are having trouble playing this video” messages. That’s on my desktop, though. On my phone, I can see the whole thing. Do let me know if you are getting the full 11 seconds, please!

I did move that garden feeder attachment aside after getting the video. I could just see part of her face after moving it, but she stayed all hunched around her babies.

I’m going to have to figure out how to get the stuff in the shed that I’ll need for the garden without scaring the heck out of them all. I don’t expect aggression from the mama, unless she feels threatened, which she might if I start moving out the bundles of garden stakes and plant supports. There’s that rolling seat/cart, but I won’t need it now that I’ve got my walker.

We’ve had cats have their litters in there, but this is a first for raccoons!

I paused to get a picture of the isolation kitties before I headed out this afternoon. Curtis is in the big cuddle puddle. Bug wants out again. 😄

Tonight, they have their overnight fast. In the morning, we have to get two into carriers. On file, we’re supposed to bring in Furriosa and Batman (aka: Marta), but they will take any two we can bring. I can see being able to get Bug. Furriosa… my daughter might be able to get her, but I’ve barely managed to sneak touches on her back. The other two, not even that, but we’ll have another week to work on them.

Once the outside cat stuff was done, it was time to head into town. My husband was finally up to getting his blood work done. That is always a challenge. They always have a hard time to get a vein on him – and they needed to take 8 vials! The tech barely got two done before she had to find another spot and was eventually able to fill the remaining vials.

That done and home again, I was going to grab an early lunch, then head over to visit my mother, since I wouldn’t be able to do it tomorrow.

Which is when I got a call from my brother.

It has finally happened.

He got a call from the nursing home. The one my mother actually wants to be in.

They have a bed for her – tomorrow!!!!

After well over two years – probably closer to three, by now! – of my mother fighting to get into a nursing home, it is finally going to happen! Yay!!!!

They wanted us to do the transport, which we thought the TCU would do. I wasn’t going to be home tomorrow, plus my mother can’t get into the truck. She can barely get into my brother’s car. So that was something that needed to be worked out.

Things were still very much in the air, except for what her room number will be, and “check in” time. She will have a room to herself, too.

I told my brother I was planning to visit after I finished my lunch, and he said he would phone Mom right away, since he was at work and was doing this between other things.

When I got to the TCU, I stopped at the nursing station first. The head nurse was there and they had already been called by the nursing home. I brought up about transportation and she told me they had already arranged a Handi Van. There will be a charge for it, since my mother is being transferred to her “forever home”, not another TCU, but it won’t be a lot. This way, they can use her wheelchair to get her in and out, and can safely secure her for the trip. The nurse suggested I take as much of my mother’s belongings as I can, to make it easier for them to transport her.

Then I went to my mother’s room. My brother had got through to her, and she was very happy with the news. She can’t wait to get out of the TCU!

We talked for a while and worked out what I should take with me for now, and I started taking things to the truck. Then I packed almost all of her remaining things in a couple of hard sided grocery bags, leaving just what she would need for the night and the morning. The head nurse came by and we talked a bit more about the transfer. She even remembered that they need to include Mom’s Pepto supply.

I visited a bit longer and we talked about how things will be done tomorrow, what they will take care of, and how she will be transported in the wheelchair while they bring the walker as well (I was specifically instructed to leave the walker).

My mother then insisted that her wheelchair has been “switched”. That her wheelchair was wider than this one. I told her, it’s the same wheelchair. I scrubbed that thing. I know what it looks like.

Only later did I remember about the cushion. Our vandal had brought her a “wheelchair” cushion, except it was basically just a memory foam cushion for a regular seat. It doesn’t actually fit in her wheelchair. Which is why it would be feeling smaller when she’s in it.

My mother has decided they’ve “switched” the wheelchair and nothing will convince her otherwise. She also claimed they “forgot” one of her meds, and went on about how terrible this place is for taking care of her medications and of her, and how she hoped it will be better in the nursing home.

It will be better, for sure, but not in the ways my mother will understand, and some things won’t change. Even while I was there, with her room mate out, she got mad and demanded I close the door, because someone in the hallway was talking. I closed the door but pointed out that, here she was, alone in the room, and complaining about noises in the hall. She’s going to hear noises in the nursing home, too. Her response was, “I’m not alone, you’re with me.”

…

So I rephrased that her room mate was not there. She will have her own room in the nursing home, but there are other people living there. She will hear noise. There is no escaping that.

I get the impression she believes that in the nursing home, things will be completely silent in her room. Granted, it’s not a transitional care unit in an old hospital, but there are a lot of people living there, and a lot of staff. She also thinks that the staff will all be white and Christian, because this place was built by a local Christian community, I forget how many decades ago. She is familiar with this place, since this is where my father spent his last 6 months, and her sister spent quite a few years before passing. Interestingly, when it came up with the head nurse, my mother talked about her sister living there, which she has brought up before, but she never mentions my father living there. It’s almost as if she’s forgotten my father existed, in many ways – and I don’t mean due to dementia. Which really doesn’t surprise me, to be honest. Ah, well.

Hopefully, things will work out. When my father was there, he always spoke about how well they were taking care of them and he would tell them how much he appreciated them.

That’s not something my mother is capable of, unfortunately, and I strongly suspect that, probably within days, she will find things to be angry about, and she will likely be lashing out at people before long. It is just the way she is.

Overall, though, it was a better than usual visit, even though she got mad at me for things like putting some of her items in the box of the truck, covered and hidden from view, because it doesn’t lock. She thinks people will steal her odds and ends. In fact, as I was leaving, the last thing she said to me was to keep her stuff safe. She’s more worried about her possessions than anything else!

Some things just don’t change.

Meanwhile, I have also been in touch with the rescue. They are happy that Bug is back in the isolation shelter. I’m really hoping all goes well, and we can get cats into the carriers in the morning!

It’s time for me to go out and feed them now. I want to make sure the isolation kitties get their fill of cat soup before we have to remove the bowl this evening. We’re going to have to be up quite early and, once we get two cats into carriers, the other cats will get their morning feeding.

Wish us luck! We’re going to need it!

The Re-Farmer

Everything, all at once!

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I had one real goal today. That was to visit my mother in the afternoon.

While doing the morning routine over the past week, my younger daughter and I had been making sure to open the gate, just in case. It was late morning when we heard a honk and I saw a thing of beauty.

The septic truck had arrived!

I headed out to meet him as he got out to check on where he needed to set the truck up. He was apologetic about not getting back to me about the delay – he’d lost my phone number! I was just glad his truck was up and running again, and he could make it at all.

Once he confirmed that he could back up around the back of the house – I wasn’t sure if our straw bale would be an issue or not – he opened up the tank to check inside. I told him about how we’ve had things backing up into the basement because there seems to be a bottleneck that I estimate to be roughly under the wall. He mused about how something like that could be fixed until I told him it was a cast iron pipe joining plastic. He just shook his head. Cast iron, over time, can start crumbling, and it’s likely near the join with the plastic pipes. As for fixing it, I told him I figured it would require tearing up the concrete and replacing the pipe. He said we’d have to excavate outside, too. I mentioned this had been done, before we moved out here and he wondered why it wasn’t fixed them. I told him, no one knew. My dad was living here alone by then. With just one person, it wasn’t a problem. He understood.

With the tank open, I stayed out on cat watching duty, to make sure none came too close to the open tank. Which is much easier, now. The rescue took so many of the cats, there’s a huge difference in what we’re seeing. Even when I check the sun room critter cam at night, I have been seeing no cats at all, many times, or just a few in the cat beds. None of the swirling masses we used to get! With the very loud truck, the cats almost all immediately disappeared. The Grink was the only one that came to check things out, and it was easy to persuade her to leave.

He was done very quickly and was soon leaving the yard, stopping when I came out with the envelope of cash we had ready for quite some time now, to pay him. Every time we’ve done it this way, he’s never even looked in the envelope, trusting me that I had the right amount. Of course, I tip him, too. Always. There have even been times when I couldn’t get to a bank machine to get cash before he came out here, and he just did the job and told me where his house was, trusting I would drop the payment off when I could.

He may be more expensive than other places; I don’t actually know for sure anymore, but I wouldn’t want to go with anyone else.

When he left, it was late enough that I was going to get changed, have a quick lunch, then head out to my mother’s.

Which is when the phone rang.

Earlier in the morning, I’d noticed that the wind was tearing off a tarp covering one of my brother’s pieces of equipment. It was too torn up for any chance to secure it again, so I took some video and sent it to my brother. He called to thank me for that, and asked if I could get some measurements, so he could pick up another tarp. So I quickly got some shoes on again and headed over with a measuring tape to get the info for him. He might come out tonight to take care of it.

Not too much longer, I was on the road to my mother’s for what turned out to be an okay visit. She was having one of her better days. The last time I was there, she had asked for a couple of apples because she missed having fresh fruit. I’d passed that on to my siblings, because I knew it would be a while before I was back. When I reached her bedside, I saw an apple on her tray, so I knew my sister had come by on her day off and remembered to bring some for her – I had completely forgotten. Once my mother was settled on her bedside, she picked up the apple and reminded me that she’d asked me to bring her apples. I guess my sister bringing her apples wasn’t good enough??

The next thing I knew, she was talking about giving me some money to get something for her, but started talking about her vision, her vison, her vision… Her vision is so important. She started going down a rabbit hole so I cut in to ask what it was she wanted me to get for her.

The eye vitamins. Because they’re only giving her the eye vitamin once a day, not twice, and she wanted me to get the gel type that she used to get in her bubble packs.

I told her, the TCU has her prescription now, not the local pharmacy – and they were definitely giving her her eye vitamin, twice a day. She insisted they were not; she was supposed to get it at the end of the day, as well as in the morning, but she wasn’t getting the second one. When I didn’t immediately agree with her, she started saying “oh, you think I’m stupid… you’re just like them… you’re taking their side“, and so on.

She also said that her vision was getting worse, because they weren’t giving her the eye vitamin, and that it was for both eyes.

I explained to her again, she has two different problems. The vitamin can only help with her left eye. For her right eye, she would have to go into the city to get the eye injection, because there is only one place that does this treatment. I even tried to ask her how her vision is getting worse. “It’s getting dark“. I asked if it was with one eye or the other, and what did she see if she covered one eye, but she wouldn’t do it and just made like it’s both eyes going the same thing.

That conversation got nowhere.

As we were chatting, her new room mate was wheeled in and transferred to her bed, promptly falling asleep. The privacy curtain was already pulled and we just kept talking. At one point, I spotted a tiny insect flying near one of my mother’s eyes and I mentioned it was there, in case she saw something moving in her peripheral vision (which is pretty good, based on the last tests she had). Her response?

Her room mate sleeps with her mouth open.

???

This confused me so I asked what that had to do with anything. She talked in circles for a while before dropping it, but she said enough that I realized she thought the insect had come from her room mate’s mouth, because she sleeps with her mouth open.

?????????

Meanwhile, I started to get messages from home.

The tree company had arrived.

My daughter and husband knew which tree was being assessed for removal, but there were details they weren’t sure of, so we messaged back and forth on that, while I told my mother about my brother wanting to hire a company to safely remove the tree.

My mother started saying, she planted that tree there, and did I know why? Yes. It was for shade. She’d told me before about how the sun through the kitchen window made it so hot. I suggested it would have been easier to put up a curtain (that window did have curtains, but they were lacy things that did not block any light), so she started telling me about how, at her childhood home back in Poland, they had a cherry tree right by the house. I pointed out, they didn’t have a basement. Oh, of course – no one had basements! So I talked a bit about how this tree’s roots were causing cracks in the basement wall, and the branches were threatening the new roof.

She brought up the extended pruning saw that should have been here. I told her I use it often, but it can’t be used on these branches. They’re just too big, and if we cut them, they’d fall onto the roof. So she started to give instructions on how we could put a rope around the branch to pull it so it would fall the way we wanted it to. I told her, that might work somewhere else, but not over the roof. It would be much better to get someone with the proper equipment and get it down right, with no risk to the roof. Oh, it’s not my business anymore.

…

*sigh*

I didn’t stay for too much longer, as my mother was looking forward to Bingo starting soon. Before I left, I stopped at the nursing station and talked to the nurse that gave my mother her meds this morning, and would again, at supper time. I told her, my mother keeps insisting that they are not giving her the second eye vitamin.

It turned out that not only is she getting it at both breakfast and supper time (it has to be taken with food), but the pill is so big, at my mother’s request, they break it in half for her. She always sets out the pills on her tray and counts them out, and when she does that, she counts the two halves as one pill, recognizing that they belong together (she has another half pill, but it’s tiny, and she takes only one half at a time).

The nurse promised that she would make sure to explain to my mother that the big pill split in half is her eye vitamin, and why she’s taking it with her supper, not at the end of the day. We talked about some other pills she has issues with, like one that she is completely convinced she used to take twice a day, but she only ever took once a day.

That done, I headed out, but not home, yet. I went to the feed store to ask about the chicks. The woman who was working out the splitting of the minimum 24 chicks order was not there. I talked to the guys that were that and was told that, if she hasn’t called me by now, she wasn’t able to confirm the arrangement. One of them made a note for her to call me when she is back next week.

Then I confirmed the date the chicks will arrive.

It’s the same day I’m supposed to bring three of the isolation cats in for their spays.

Crud.

I would be dropping them off at 8am, though, and they said the chicks tend to arrive at 11am or later, so we would have time to drop off the cats, then drive to the feed store to get the chicks. We would then have to take them home and get them set up in a brooder before I would have to drive back to pick up the cats and bring them home!

That’s going to be a lot of driving.

While there, I got an extra 40 pound bag of kibble, plus a chick feeder and waterer, both gravity fed. I’ll get the pine shavings and chick feed another time. I may not be able to get chicks, if I can’t split a minimum order with someone, but if that doesn’t work out, I know people I can guy adult laying hens from.

On the way home, I remembered to stop at the post office. I wasn’t expecting anything, but it’s been a while.

I’m glad I did.

I got a letter from the health care system. I’m booked for a pelvic ultrasound on June 9, in the hospital that’s literally across the road from the vet clinic we get spays and neuters done at. 😁 The appointment time is in the afternoon, which will be much easier for us to get to.

I’m surprised I got the appointment so fast. My younger daughter had to wait for almost a year before she got an ultrasound done, but the images weren’t clear, so they want to to come back. That was two winters ago.

Meanwhile, there isn’t much news from my older daughter. Things are improving, but not where they should be, yet. She really wants to just go home. Which I can understand, that’s for sure! Still, it means we have no idea when she’ll be discharged.

While today was nowhere near as windy as yesterday, we were still dealing with high winds – though we didn’t lose any trees, where I could see! – and it was overcast and rainy. The sort of weather that always makes me sleepy. After I got home, I settled at my computer for a while, watching the latest Tasting History video, and fell asleep in my chair! Aside from the evening cat feeding, the only thing I managed to get done outside today was a bit of clean up in the old kitchen garden.

Tonight, we’re supposed to drop to freezing or lower – I made sure the heat lamp in the isolation shelter was plugged in and on – and tomorrow is supposed to be chilly. Which is actually a good time to do some of the direct sowing I want to do. Hopefully, I’ll be able to work on that. I’m also hoping to finally get my mother’s old mattress and box spring to the dump, but we shall see when the time comes. We’ve got a few chilly days ahead, then we’ll warm up moderately. There is still much to do out there in the garden, and the month is already half over! The long range forecast says we’re supposed to suddenly get very hot during the day, approaching 30C/86F, and staying high for all of June.

We’ll see what actually happens.

For now, though, I need to get any seeds that prefer cold soil direct sown right away.

At some point, I’ll be able to get back to working on the walls of that garden bed!

What I really want to do right now it crawl into bed and sleep for a week.

*sigh*

The Re-Farmer

A visit in, and getting things done

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This morning, I woke to find a message from my older daughter. She had been up all night, not feeling well at all. Her sister stayed up with her to be available to help out.

Not being in a position to cook for herself, she sent me some funds and a request. After talking to her about it, I added a Walmart trip to my list of places to go today.

The first order of business, was to load up the truck with garbage and recycling for the dump. My younger daughter helped me, but she had been up for more than 24 hours, so she was pretty dead on her feet! She headed to bed shortly after the truck was loaded.

Silly me, I headed out right away, forgetting that the dump is not on summer hours. They open at 10am now, not 9am. Thankfully, I remember that before I was a mile away, so I turned around and headed home. It worked out for the better, since I had time to have a real breakfast before going.

The dump was surprisingly busy today. Driving up to the pit, I found a row of four trucks, two with trailers, unloading. I rarely see more than two vehicles at once.

When I checked in with the attendant and told him I had household garbage and recycling, he said I hoped I had only glass! They have one recycling bin for glass, and the rest for general recycling. Six big bins, and they were all full. The recycling gets taken to the city for processing, and it hadn’t been done yet. After I was done unloading into the pit, I found the least over filled bin. Normally, as per instructions on signs, recycling would be removed from any bags; there’s even a separate blue bin, the size of a large trash bin, just for the bags. I didn’t do that today, and just set all the bags on top. When I saw the attendant going by, I made sure to tell him I was leaving them in the bags, so things wouldn’t get blown away. He appreciated that!

Once done, I headed home long enough to change out of my grubbies, then headed out.

On the way to the truck, I spotted this adorableness.

I’ve turned off the heat lamps in the sun room again, since it stays warmer overnight, but for the next couple of days, I’m leaving the heat lamp on in here. When things warm up again, I’ll shut it off during the day and turn it back on at night.

The cats were really appreciating the heat lamp!

It’s been a while since I’ve been to anywhere I could pick up a card, so I stopped at a small department store to get a Mother’s Day card and signed it before going to the TCU to visit my mother. I stopped at the nursing station first, to ask how she’s been.

The woman that had spoke to us before to talk about my mother wanting to see a doctor, and about her medications, was there. She told me that, after our little meeting, my mother had gone to the nursing station to watch her prepare my mom’s supper time medications – and was already telling her, they were the wrong medications.

They aren’t.

In the end, it comes down to my mother simply refusing to believe the nurses know what they are doing, and believing that they are deliberately messing up her medications, because she’s old and they want old people to die.

*sigh*

The staff tell her what the different pills are, every time they give them to her, explaining which is which and what they are for. She apparently just looks at them and nods her head, most times, and that’s about it. Yet I know she’s been writing notes on a pad she keeps in the drawer under her bedside table, of what she’s getting and when, writing down the descriptions of each pill and making little doodles of them, later on.

As we were talking, another nurse came behind the counter and settled in. Hearing us, she said, “Oh, we’re talking about [my mother].”

“Yes.”

“Ah…”

All I could do was shake my head. It’s not the first time I’ve had that response about my mother! She did clarify that this was a good “ah”. She was my mother’s nurse, this morning.

As we were talking, I brought up about my mother calling me, demanding I take her over to the clinic down the hall, so she could make an appointment with a doctor there. I had told her, I already asked them about it. They won’t do it. Which the nurses both confirmed with me. I told them, I had repeated this several times, until my mother hung up on me – and that’s the last time I have talked to her!

They wished me well on the visit. 😄

After getting updated on things, I went to my mother’s room to see if she was there. She wasn’t, so I headed to the common room. There were other people visiting with another resident in some armchairs by the door. My mother was in her favourite spot; an armchair right in a corner, between two large windows. Snoozing!

She woke right away, though, as I grabbed a chair and settled in beside her. I gave her the card, which she asked me to take out and read to her.

There wasn’t much to talk about, really. My brother had called her yesterday, as he and his wife were going to spend Mother’s Day weekend with their grandsons, in another province. The TCO recreation person had gotten permission from us to take her out for a Mother’s Day meal at a nearby restaurant, which is fully accessible. There were enough ladies to do this with, so they were splitting it between two days. I didn’t know which day my mother was going to be going, and I asked her about it. She said she didn’t go, because she hadn’t been feeling well. In the end, it worked out, because my sister visited that day.

She then asked me what I was planning for Mother’s Day and I ended up telling her about the all-terrain walker my husband got for me, which should arrive soon. Something that can handle being used around our yard as I work, and to keep hand in case I have another fall, like I did last year, where my daughter brought my husband’s walker for me to use to get back to the house. I even mentioned to her that I have my appointment at the sports injury clinic in the city on Monday. That got my mother talking about how my brother and I should really get my sister to be more involved in taking care of my mother, because I have so much to deal with, even though my sister doesn’t understand my mother’s medications like we do. I told her, it makes more sense for me to be the one, because I am the most available, and live the closest.

After a while, my mother brought up about wanting to see a “real” doctor at the clinic down the hall. There are three doctors that some in from the city, she says. Women doctors. She should see them. I tried to explain, again, that the clinic won’t do that. She is under a doctor’s supervision where she is, and there are nurses to take care of her. Nurses that play doctor, she told me. With some of them, she doesn’t believe they are nurses at all. One, because he’s male, and men can’t be nurses, in her mind. She had the same attitude about the male home care workers.

Before she could go off on another tangent, she then told me about the nurses messing up with her medications and not giving her what she’s supposed to, at the right times. She described an incident she says happened more than once that made absolutely no sense to me. Partly because she said she was supposed to have her blood pressure medication at that time, which I knew she didn’t. She got that one earlier in the day. She insisted, and then told me about how this person had given her her Tylenol, but not her other medications. When my mother brought it up, she claimed the person said she got was she was supposed to, but then took a pill out of a blister pack and gave it to her. My mother said she took it.

None of this made sense to me.

In the end, it was a short visit. My mother got her lunch while I was there. A chicken burger, with lettuce and tomato, cut in half, potato salad, canned peaches, tomato juice, milk and the hot water she requests in place of tea. She ate only half her burger, the potato salad, her peaches, had a few sips of tomato juice, but mostly drank the warm water. She offered me the other half of her burger, because she didn’t want it to go to waste. She said she doesn’t have as much appetite anymore. Overall, she seemed pretty down, tired and depressed. She did add that she looks forward to when it’s warmer, so maybe one of her children will take her out to that restaurant for dinner. Considering it was cloudy and trying to rain, I can understand that. Overcast and rainy weather always leaves me feeling drained and tired, too. The only time she showed any sort of energy was when the group of people across the room suddenly started to laugh. My mother glared at them, her eyes filled with absolute rage. That is something she complains about constantly, every time she’s been in the hospital over the years, and now that she’s in the TCU. Other people laughing. She has even berated people in restaurants for laughing. She complains about the noise and how disruptive it is, but I’ve come to realize, it’s not really the noise. She just hates other people showing happiness. Often times, she also believes that they are laughing at her, specifically. I think part of the problem is that she can’t conceive of other people being happy, because she, herself, never is. When – if – she laughs, it’s never out of happiness. It’s usually to mock people, or to try and manipulate them. I honestly can’t remember my mother ever laughing out of happiness, in all my life. I’m sure she had at some point, but I was probably too young to remember it.

My mother’s mind must be a terrible place to be in.

There was very little to talk about, so I helped her put aside the bedside table with the food tray so she could get up, and walked her to her room before heading out.

From there, I drove to the nearer city to do my Walmart run. Since it shares the parking lot, I swung by the Dollarama first, to see if there was anything to pick up. The gardening supplies are being stocked, and they have some really good stakes and plant supports and much better prices. They didn’t have much for those, this time, but I did end up getting a sprinkler hose. Something I can set up under a covered garden bed, so I can water without having to take the cover off completely. I do have a couple of soaker hoses, but they release water so slowly, it takes forever to water a bed. It’s just a cheap one, dollar store hose, so I don’t expect it to last very long, but it’ll last long enough that I can decide on whether it’s worth getting more. At some point, when the budget allows, we’ll probably get a drip irrigation system. Not until we trench a hose from the house and set up a replacement garden tap.

That done, I headed to the Walmart. I had a small list of my own, as well as stuff my daughter requested, and it didn’t take very long. I kept feeling like I was forgetting something, but had no idea what. It didn’t help that this location is still in the process of being renovated, and everything has been moved. It was also really busy, not just with customers, but with pallets, trollies, pallet jacks and more, blocking the aisles.

I remembered what I was forgetting, just now. I don’t even know where the section is, anymore. I was going to pick up water soluble fertilizer to add to the water for the earliest transplants. They’re getting big enough to need it. It’s will probably be at least 4 more weeks before any of them can be transplanted outside, unless I’m able to cover the beds with plastic.

That done, I headed home, though I did have to stop for gas along the way. Gas prices are still $1.889/L

After everything was unloaded and put away, I updated my siblings, then called the TCU. The woman I spoke to before visiting my mother answer the phone, which made things easier. I explained, as best I could, what my mother had told me. It didn’t make sense to her, either.

What I now know, however, is that the Tylenol they get comes sealed in blister packs. The medication my mother gets before bed, which is a blood thinner, not a blood pressure pill, comes in a paper packet that is torn open. My mother had said the nurse had waited and watched her take the Tylenol, but it had to have been her blood thinner – yet she’s never said anything about a pill being taken out of a paper packet.

I was assured that, when my mother is given her medications, each one is shown to her and explained. When talking to me about it later, it’s clear my mother doesn’t believe them. She’s had it explained to her, many times, that even though the pills might look a little different – or a lot different, as is the case with her eye vitamin – they still have the same medication and dose in them. My mother keeps saying, they are the wrong pills. Especially with that eye vitamin. Before, she had been getting the gel version, which is large and almost black in colour. Now, it’s a round white tablet.

I explained that this has been an issue in the past, when the pharmacy changed suppliers for one of her meds. It looked every so slightly different in size and tint. My mother decided that the pharmacist had changed her prescription and was giving her something else. My siblings and I explained it to her. The pharmacist explained it to her. The doctor explained it to her. She never accepted that. I told her about my mother having to have a lock box for her meds, and that I’d found a pill organizer with probably 50 pills in it that she’d taken out of her bubble packs, long before she got the lock box.

I don’t think the problem is that my mother isn’t able understand that the same medication can come indifferent forms. I think it’s more that she refuses to accept that as a possibility. She would rather believe people are incompetent, or deliberately messing with her medications.

*sigh*

Still, the nurse said she would look into what my mother described. She asked if I knew what the nurse looked like, or when it happened, but my mother’s sense of time has gotten very bad, and she only gave a description of things that bothered her for some reason. The hat the nurse was wearing, the fact that she had curls of hair hanging out from under it, behind her head, and that she was wearing a cross body “purse” (with how my mother described it, I don’t think it was a purse) that she never took off. It wasn’t much for her to go on. All I could be relatively sure of is that what my mother described would have happened after the nurse had her meeting with us, so within the past week. In the end, though, I can’t even be 100% sure of that. My mother made it sound like it was recent, but she’s done that about things that have happen days, weeks, even years ago. So who really knows.

Meanwhile, I’m getting messages, photos and video from my brother and SIL, hanging out with their grand kids. Oh, and their son and daughter in law, too. 😁 They’re having a blast! I’m glad they could make the trip out.

All in all, even with the short but rather odd visit with my mother, it’s been a good and relatively productive day. Tomorrow is expected to be cooler again, so I will use that as my excuse to get a real, honest to goodness, day of rest. I hadn’t pushed myself hard yesterday, but I still needed to get my husband to slather on the diclofenac last night. Even between that and the painkillers I took before bed, I was awakened this morning by sharp pain in my hips. Both of them. Which, strangely, lessened as soon as I was up and moving around.

I’m really looking forward to my appointment at the sports injury clinic on Monday!

Hopefully, I won’t have to deal with it again, tomorrow morning!

We shall see.

The Re-Farmer

*sigh*

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Yup. More snow.

At least the rhubarb (second picture) can handle it. The garlic seems fine, too. I think my winter sown beds are toast.

I’m skipping the dump run today.

On another note, I got the new topical painkiller, diclofenac, applied last night. Between that and regular painkillers, I actually slept, with only a couple of interruptions, for nearly 10 hours last night. I could still go back to bed for another 10 hours, if I could, but I recognize that this fatigue is my usual response to dreary days like today.

Oh, dear. I just got interrupted by a phone call from my mother.

*sigh*

She was demanding I take her to the doctor. She wants me to walk her across to the clinic in the same building (the doors to the TCU are locked to prevent residents from wandering) and she would make the appointment herself. I tried to explain – again – that I already called about making an appointment for her and they said now, because of where she is. She is under constant medical supervision. The staff there can tend to her current needs. After several times asking, she finally told me why she wanted to go to the doctor.

It’s her ears.

She got her 5 days of mineral oil treatment, but no one has flushed her ears. I pointed out, it’s not even 9am yet. Give them time. It took a while before she told me that one of the staff had said she would find someone experienced with ear flushing, and then she left. She’s gone. Maybe it’s her day off (I have no idea if this happened yesterday or this morning; my mother’s sense of time is pretty much gone). I said again, give them time. If she said she was going to find someone with experience, she needs time to do that.

My mother went back to demanding I take her to the clinic so she could make an appointment, accompanied by various insults on how I’m “afraid of the doctor” and how she’s “not allowed” to see a doctor, and “is this Russia or Canada?” The irony of that is, she’s probably be getting better care in Russia right now, than anywhere in Canada.

I kept trying to explain to her how things work, but she ended up hanging up on me.

*sigh*

What a way to start the day.

And it’s still not even 9am yet.

The Re-Farmer

A draining visit, a good visit and some spring clean up done

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Today, I was supposed to do a dump run, but I was just too tired and in pain. It’ll have to wait until they’re open again on Tuesday.

I had a rough pain night and didn’t get much sleep, so I was going to try lying down for a bit, then visit my mother in the afternoon. I wasn’t looking forward to that, after her last phone call, but it needed to be done. I wasn’t down for long when I got a message from my SIL. My brother was on his way to see our Mother, and would then come here to the farm.

So I decided to head out to my mother’s earlier and meet him there. When I got there, though, I found another message from my SIL, as well as from my husband. My brother had tried to call me, but he was calling the land line. He was going to the farm, first.

Which worked out. I got the messages just as I parked at the hospital and realized my mother would be getting her lunch tray, so I walked around for a bit to give her time to finish eating before I went in. I stopped at the nursing station to find out about the phone call I didn’t get on Tuesday, about arranging a family meeting with the doctor. The person at the desk wasn’t the one in the know, so she made a note for the nurse in charge to come see us while I was visiting her.

The first part of the visit was okay. My mother talked a lot about things she remembered from back in Poland. All stuff I’d heard before, but that’s okay. I took a chance and showed her pictures of the chicken coop. She asked me why I didn’t build a shed for them instead of something with so many “windows”. I told her, because we can’t do that right now, this is what we’ve got. She laughed at me for having a chicken coop but no chickens. I told her we were getting chicks at the end of the month. Just 10 for now. Only 10? So few?

…

I told her, the coop is only big enough for 10 chicks.

Then she started going on about how wonderful our vandal is, because he buys his eggs from the Hutterites, and he bought chickens for the freezer from them, too. Now, it’s entirely possible he did this once or twice, years ago, but in her mind this is something he always does. I told her, the Hutterites have a huge operation; we just need enough chickens for eggs for ourselves.

Oh, and my sister’s husband visited our vandal, who told him he doesn’t want me or my brother at his funeral. Which I figured. My mother told me, she wanted us to do what was the right “Christian” thing to do. *sigh*

Then the nurse came and things got… brutal, though in a relatively calm way, for my mother.

In a nutshell; the doctor will not see her or have any meetings about her, because he simply doesn’t have the time. She does not have any medical need for a doctor’s care. She went on about her hearing and her vision, but neither is something that requires him. My mother is undergoing the mineral oil treatment on her ears again – it will be for 5 days this time – before they try flushing it again, and my mother had all sorts of things to complain about with that. Meanwhile, my mother is adamant that they are not giving her her second eye vitamin pill of the day. She writes it all down, she counts all her pills, but they tell her different things about different pills – the nurse and I both realized that my mother was mixing a blue pill up with a green pill, thinking they were the same pill, so that’s why she was getting different answers. My mother is also now convinced that her hearing was “perfect” before she came there, and her hearing problems have something to do with not getting her pills. When I pointed out that she used to have her TV and radio incredibly loud when I’d come over to her apartment in the past, she switched to Polish and accused me of taking their side and of lying. She also wants a pill for her eyes. I had to go over how the eye vitamin is only helpful for her left eye and the dry macular degeneration. The only treatment for the wet macular degeneration in her right eye is the injections she would have to go to the city for. She has rejected that and demands another pill; going back to how she claims they have stopped giving her the second one of the day. Even her own notes show that she is getting two pills at 5pm, but now she says she only gets one.

Even after the nurse left, my mother kept insisting they were not giving her these eye vitamins, and all her health problems have now only started after she came to this TCU. Things she has been dealing with for a long time. I kept trying to explain things, but she just went back to the manipulation, saying I was taking their side, etc. etc. I finally said, it was time for me to go.

As I was getting ready to leave, my mother brother up her wheelchair. This is a folding wheelchair that had been my father’s.

She asked me if I recognized it. I saw it in the hallway and said I did. She asked me to bring it over, and began questioning me about recognizing it. The staff had clearly given it a really good cleaning; whatever they used on the heavy vinyl got it all nice and supple and looking brand new. They even oiled the squeaky food rest. However, it’s an old chair, and there are cracks in the wheels and spots of rust that I could say where there before.

My mother clearly didn’t believe me. She has decided it’s not the same chair anymore. The hospital switched it.

This is not a new thing. For as long as I can remember, she accused my father of “trading” cattle, vehicles, furniture, the TV, etc. and he was giving the “good” versions the second family she believed he had, and the “bad” versions for us. When she tried to convince me a particular cow had been traded because it looked different – it had matured and filled out, looking bigger, strong and healthier – I pointed out that if this cow had been “traded”, we now have a better cow, so how did her accusations make sense?

I had a very confusing childhood at times.

The visit done, I headed home, utterly drained. My brother was still here, so we sat in their mobile home and I filled him in. It was good to talk to him about it in person, and we had a great visit! He was dreading his visit with Mom, but I just heard from him. He ended up staying with Mom for a couple of hours and the visit went well. It seems my mother got her nasty out of her system before he got there. I’m very glad it worked out that way, because she has been incredibly cruel to him during most of his visits with her.

After filling in my brother, I headed inside and took a bit of a break before changing into my grubbies and going outside for some manual labour. That, more than anything else, really helps decompress after a visit with my mother.

My focus for today was getting the straw off the septic tank. I had just started when I began getting messages from the cat rescue.

They are trying to get ahold of special traps to borrow and bring here. Traps with motion sensors and operated by remote. We can set up the camera currently facing the isolation shelter to monitor the traps. When the motion sensor goes off, check the camera to see what critter is in it. This way, we can trigger the trap only if the specific cat we are after – Slick, for example – is in the trap. Skunks and raccoons can be ignored. 😄 That would be amazing!

My brother was getting ready to head out around then, and dropped off some lovely compost they’d made from their own kitchen scraps for me. He had time to check out the chicken coop and we talked about the septic area, and the emergency bypass set up I had set off to the side until the straw was gone. After he left, I continued and got it all clear. The surface straw was set aside in a pile, but the damp straw touching the ground, which was already starting to rot, got raked up and repurposed as mulch around the honeysuckle and white rose bushes in the old kitchen garden.

That clear, I set up all the parts and pieces for the emergency bypass against the old kitchen wall for their summer storage.

That done, I also set up a hose at the tap in the wall next to the pipe running out of the basement for the emergency bypass. The shut off valve in the basement can now be opened. I won’t set all the hoses up until things warm up more, but I can at least fill watering cans for the pre-sown beds, etc., for now.

My next garden priority is to start more seeds inside. That keeps getting pushed back, but most of what we have left to start indoors are for 3-4 weeks before last frost, so for those we still have a bit of breathing room. I have only a few things in the 4-6 week range that need to be started now.

So this has been… a day. I’m very happy I got to see my brother and that I got some work done outside. As for my visit with my mother, it is what it is.

It just left me feeling so incredibly drained! Getting the straw cleared off actually helped with that. Now I’m just physically tired, not both physically and mentally tired! 😄

The Re-Farmer

What a day

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My original plan. It’s colder today, so I was going to wait until we got near our expected high of the day, do some work outside, then visit my mother.

Of course, that didn’t quite happen as planned. I never got any work done outside at all.

After my morning rounds, I had breakfast and spent some time catching up on my computer, which is working very well again right now. Which is when I found posts on FB from the rescue, talking about Frank!

The intake person still has Frank, and Frank has not warmed up to her or anyone at all. At most, she came out of her hiding place and had a nap on the floor in full view, once.

Well, yesterday, she went into labour, but it was clearly not progressing. They had to take her in for an emergency C section, and managed it only because she had hunkered down into a cat cave. They were able to slide the entire thing, with her in it, into a large dog crate. Once at the vet clinic, they apparently had to use a net to get her!

She had three kittens. Two survived, but Frank didn’t want anything to do with them. Volunteer fosters with experience bottle feeding newborn kittens have stepped in, and as far as I know, Frank is still at the clinic, recovering from surgery.

Poor Frank!

So far, her two baby boys are doing well with the fosters.

Once I saw the posts, I messaged the group chat I have with some people from the rescue and we were talking about her, when my mother phoned.

After our hellos, I told her I’d been planning to visit her later today, after I got some work done outside.

I was promptly informed that she was more important than anything else, and I needed to visit her.

No, she didn’t have any emergency, though she did bring up her ears and hearing problems. I tried asking her if they were doing the oil treatment to be able to clear her ears if it was a wax build up, as she has had happen in the past. She made some disparaging comments about the staff and I knew I wasn’t going to get a straight answer from her.

In the end, she asked me to bring her some Ginger Ale – just a small bottle – and a tube of Voltaren that she wanted me to bring to her and hide from the staff.

*sigh*

My mother had been asking for a particular cushion with a crocheted cover she wanted me to bring to her. I had found two almost identical ones and already had one of them in the truck to bring to her. After our call, I quickly changed out of my work clothes and headed out, just before lunch time. I stopped at the pharmacy to get her Voltaren, then went to the grocery store to find the small bottles of Ginger Ale. I’d considered getting her the tiny pop cans, instead, but a 6 pack of those costs almost as much as a 12 pack of full size cans! So I got her a 6 pack of Ginger Ale.

On entering the grocery store, though, I saw a sign saying their had seed potatoes in stock. I ended up getting a 5 pound bag of Yukon Gold and another of Viking Red, which I am not familiar with. I don’t know if we’ll get more potatoes later on, but we will at least have as many as we planted last year. It depend on what space I’m able to get available.

When I got to my mother’s, I stopped to talk to the nursing station first. The nurse there today actually worked at the hospital while my mother was there and remembered her, though I don’t think my mother remembers her back. I asked about my mother’s oil treatment for her ears, mentioning that my mother had specifically brought up that her right ear is worse. She dug out my mother’s file in their note book, where every shift’s nurse writes down things of note for the next shift, and for the doctor when he does his rounds once a week.

My mother’s file has a lot of notes.

She found the notes from the nurse to did my mother’s ears. She got the mineral oil treatment for three days, then he flushed her ears. The notes said her right ear was clear, and only a small amount came from her left year.

Since it is now confirmed it’s not a wax build up causing the problem, we talked about the situation for a while. In the end, we would have to make an appointment with an audiologist in the city ourselves, but once we let them know when the appointment is, they would arrange the transportation, since my mother would have to use her wheelchair. A family member could accompany, of course.

While the nurse was reading the notes on my mother’s file, she spotted something of concern for me. My mother has a new room mate now. A very frail woman. It seems my mother has pushed her walker and something else of hers out into the hallway, angry that they were … in the way? It wasn’t very clear.

That got me to asking about the possibility of my mother getting one of the private rooms, if one opens up. My mother will always complain about her room mates, no matter what, and she did have one that was apparently aggressive towards her, in the other TCU, but this is about my mother’s behaviour towards her room mates, not the other way around. The nurse took notes about that. We also talked about how my mother is on the waiting list for a particular nursing home. There’s no way to know now long that would happen, though.

We also talked about my mother’s medications, as the notes say she keeps asking about them. It turns out the “extra” pills my mother is getting are just multivitamins. This has been explained to her, but she doesn’t seem to get it.

Before going to my mother’s room, I showed the 6 pack of Ginger Ale bottles I was bringing to my mother, but also told her about the Voltaren, and that my mother asked me to keep it a secret from them. I explained, it’s just for her knees, which she can apply herself. That’s it. They already do her back and hip for her. The nurse agreed that it would be fine for my mother to have some to apply to her knees, herself. I just made sure to remind my mother later that I got her the extra strength version, so to use it only once every 12 hours.

When I got to my mother’s room, there was a cleaning staff member there, offering to take my mother’s lunch tray away. There was a note my mother had written on a napkin that she asked about, and it was for the kitchen staff. She wrote that they were giving her too big of a glass of milk and she couldn’t finish it and didn’t want to waste it, so she wanted a smaller glass. The woman tried to explain to my mother that she can’t write a note like that, or tell someone like her about it. My mother needed to go to the nurse so they can write it down in the instructions for her meals. My mother wasn’t understanding why; she felt writing the note should be enough. Since I was there and heard all this, I said I would take care of it and went back to the nursing station.

After explaining the situation, the nurse got out the folder with instructions for each residence and found my mother’s. She already had instructions to have a cup of hot water to go with her milk, so she can mix them together.

I spotted the problem.

They give her a full cup of milk, and a full insulated coffee/tea cup of hot water. Both are so full, she can’t combine them.

There are now instructions to give my mother only a half glass of milk with her meals, and she will have the room to mix her milk and hot water, the way she likes it, now!

As I was walking back, I crossed paths with the cleaning lady, and she started saying how she is surprise she hasn’t run into me before. She’d worked in our little hamlets single hotel/restaurant/bar for years.

Turns out, she’s a neighbour. She’d been to this farm, years ago, probably while I was still living here! When I asked her name, I did recognize it, though I certainly didn’t recognize her. Too many years have passed.

I told her I’ve been living in other provinces for some 30 years, and we’ve only been back for 8, going on 9, years. Plus, we don’t go out much. 😄

It turns out she knows our vandal quite well and mentioned him in passing, since she sees him all the time and knows how close we used to be. Even as she talked about him and started to cringe, commenting on “how he is” now.

*sigh*

As we were talking, my mother popped her head out of the room and we both greeted her. Not long after, she popped her head out again and told me, “I thought you came to visit ME!” I told her, “I was just saying hello to my neighbour!”

We said our goodbyes and I went to my mother’s room. Her room mate was not there, so we stayed there for my entire visit. As I came in, the first thing she did was tell me to close the door. There is someone across the hall that has his TV on and she found it too loud.

For someone who is having hearing issues, it’s surprising how much it bothers her, because it really wasn’t that loud. She had her own TV and radio on in her apartment when I’ve visited her, much much louder!

The visit went… okay. It certainly has been worse.

She complained about her pills, convinced that they are deliberately messing with her medications because they want old people to just die.

She brought out a list she’s been writing, of how many pills they give her and when, and now they’re giving them to her at the wrong times and the wrong amounts. She wouldn’t let me actually see the list, though.

I told her I talked to the nurse about her ears and she told me the flushing was done by a Filipino guy who says he’s a nurse, but who knows what he really is, and how nothing was flushed out of her ears. I told her, that meant there was no wax build up and explained about needing to get her ears tested in the city. That got a derisive comment about how they are just trying to push responsibility for her onto someone else. Why can’t the doctor do it? I had to explain, she needs to go to a specialist with the training and the equipment for it. A regular doctor can’t do it. She disagreed.

Oh, and she thinks her pills are causing her hearing loss. And eating is causing her breathing problems.

She complained that I brought her a 6 pack of Ginger Ale, when she only asked for one bottle.

She complained that the noise from the TV was breaking her sanity and literally killing her.

She complained that there was a chair in the corner of the room, where she stacks some of her stuff, because it’s ugly and big and doesn’t suit the room and she has asked for a shelf, instead. The chair is not big, not ugly, and all the double occupancy rooms are furnished exactly the same. She just doesn’t want it there.

She tried to make me take a pocket book on the life of Princess Diana that someone gave her but she has trouble reading because her eyesight is going. I tried to politely decline, so she tried to tell me to give it to my daughters. They need to read, too. I told her, we all read. What do we read? All sorts of things. We just don’t have any interest in the personal life of a dead princess. She took issue with the fact that we don’t read the things she thinks we should be reading.

At one point, she actually asked me what was new. I told her, she already knew about the well pump. That was pretty much it. She told me, she didn’t want to know about that, it’s our business. I told her, then don’t ask what’s new if you don’t want to know! She then explained she meant if we watched anything new on TV. I reminded her, we don’t watch TV.

I tried to tell her about uncovering the garlic bed and how they’re already sprouting, and got a lecture about how it’s too early to uncover them because it’s still too cold. Then went on about how, after we first moved here, she had offered to hire someone to plow the old garden area for us to garden in, but I said no. I told her, right… I said no. Because that would not have been a good thing. I tried to remind her, we don’t have a herd of cows with manure we can add to the soil, like she did, and the soil is very poor now. That’s why we are doing things differently.

That got the same response as mentioning the well pump did.

When the door opened and someone assisted my mother’s room mate in, my mother immediately began to complain about the TV. I told her, maybe they are hard of hearing, too? Oh, but then everyone has to suffer. I pointed out that not all people are bothered by it, and just tune it out (which I had already done during). I reminded her that some people always have a TV on, like my in laws did, just for background noise. Oh, that must be why she (my late mother in law) died.

…

I told her flat out that this was a very terrible thing to say.

My mother was completely indifferent and unapologetic.

Needless to say, I didn’t stay too much longer.

By the time I got home, it was late in the afternoon. I finally had my lunch, then headed out to feed the outside cats. I never did get any work done in the garden. I’ll have to make up for it, tomorrow.

I did get more messages from the rescue while I was with my mother, and they are talking about trapping cats. After what happened with Frank, the intake person really wants to get the females done, so no other cat has to go through what Frank is going through. It turns out Princes Auto has an 80% off sale on traps right now, and two people have already picked some up.

When I headed outside to do the second feeding of the day, I managed to get a good picture of one of our most feral females.

We have not named her. I am open to suggestions!

I have not seen Adam or Slick today at all, but this one, and Sprout, who is just as feral, have both shown up. I strongly suspect this white and grey is not nursing, because of how often I am seeing her in the inner yard. I find it hard to believe she didn’t get pregnant, when she and others went into heat in January, which is really, really early for that. Which suggests to me she may have lost a litter. I had no way of knowing, though, and we don’t see enough of her body to be able to tell if she’s nursing.

The second picture in the slideshow above is of the two big traps we have, which I sent to the rescue chat group. We have two others that my brother gave me, but they are more appropriate to catch squirrels, not adult cats. The thing is, if we were to manage to trap a cat, we’d have to get them in somewhere immediately – and we still have to find a way to monitor the traps. The intake person agreed, yes, immediately, but I asked, immediately to where? I have not had a response yet. As far as I know, I can’t just show up with a cat in a trap at a vet clinic and request a spay or neuter. Especially since the only clinic that we’re dealing with (with special rates and arrangements with the rescue) is a 45-50 minute drive away. So where would I go with them once they are trapped?

Other folks in the chat group were talking about coming here, as a group, with traps to get as many as possible for spay or neuter and release. Which would be the best plan, since they would be able to work something out before they even arrived here. The intake person wants me to focus on females only, but there’s no way to pick and choose who gets trapped.

We shall see what actually ends up happening.

So that is where I am at now. A very different day than expected!

I do hope Frank heals up well, and they are able to find a way to get her adopted out. While we are more than willing to take her back, I’d hate for her to become an outside cat again, and it would be too much for her to join the crowd of inside cats we already have.

Ah, well.

What will be, will be.

The Re-Farmer

Well, now

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That’s not supposed to happen.

It’s a good thing we’ve already arranged for the plumber to come back next week.

One of the things he instructed my daughter, after the new pump was installed, was to keep an eye out for leaks. Which is a bit difficult partly because there tends to be a lot of condensation on the pipes. That well water gets really, really cold!

This is definitely not condensation.

That’s how I found it this morning.

As this basement was built before weeping tile was a thing, it’s pretty normal for there to be water on the floor in the spring. Sometimes all summer. We have oscillating fans and blower fans to try and keep it down, and switch the winter window to the summer screen window for air circulation. That frequent wet is part of why the well pump, pressure tank and hot water tank are all on an elevated concrete slab.

I am starting to see water in the floor drain, from the weeping tile under the newer basement, but for now, the concrete is dry. This is all from the pump. One spot, where I can feel a drop of water under the brass fitting, seems to be the only leak. The steel screw clamps are tight.

The plumber is coming out on Monday or Tuesday. I had mentioned the leak at the pump, plus the cold water tap at the laundry sink. He will be replacing both taps for us, since the hot water tap started leaking long ago and we could only install a shut off valve to stop it. He’ll check on the leak at the well pump as well.

Otherwise, the pump is working just fine.

In other things…

I made it out to visit my mother, though I had to turn around and come back. I had some stuff she asked for ready in bags and forgot them at home. Thankfully, I remembered before I reached the highway, and messaged my daughter to meet me at the gate with them.

When I got there, my mother was sitting on her walker in the hall as her room was being cleaned, so we went to the common room. It was a pretty quiet and calm visit. My mother had complaints, of course, but nothing unreasonable, really – even the ones that turned out to be based on her not understanding something she’d been told. I stayed until she was done her lunch, then talked to the nursing station for a bit – an opportunity to clear up one of her misunderstandings – before heading out.

From there, I drove to the town we usually shop in. My husband had a list and his own budget for me this time. Some of what he wanted I wouldn’t have been able to find at the grocery store in my mother’s town. It was a fairly short list, so it didn’t take long before I was done. Then I had to get more gas before heading home. That part was painful.

Throughout all that driving, I’m happy to say the truck behaved. After what happened with the differential, there were a few times on the highway where I was second guessing things, but it seems I was just driving headlong into the wind and being buffeted. More importantly, that oil pressure gauge was having normal readings. Hopefully, the mystery readings are now at an end! The real test will come with city trips, though, and those probably won’t happen for a couple more weeks.

For now, though, I feel ready to drop. For some reason, I just couldn’t fall asleep last night, and I can only partly blame the cats or pain levels. I was mostly just… awake. It was past 6am when I messaged the girls, asking them to take care of the morning routine for me. I did finally get a few interrupted hours of sleep after that. Enough that I was safe to drive, at least. I headed outside to do the evening rounds not long ago, and felt like I was ready to fall asleep the whole time. Now, I am just crashing.

It’s not even 4:30 as I write this.

It’s a gorgeous day out, though. We’re just below freezing, but it’s bright and sunny, and things are melting. The current forecast has us going from a high of 0C/32F tomorrow, to a high of 14C/57F on Monday! We no longer have a high of 20C/68F before the end of the month, though. That’s been pushed back until May. Still, I should have a few days next week to take the mulch off the exposed pre-sown beds and get them protected from critters. The garden beds in the main garden area are still fully covered with snow.

I’m quite looking forward to getting at it!

Hopefully, with more fresh air and sunshine, I’ll be sleeping better, too.

The Re-Farmer

Six… with help

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The goal for this morning was to get at least 7, hopefully 8, cats into carriers to be taken to the rescue in the city.

Of course, things didn’t work out as planned.

My daughter and I prepped the carriers and started with the morning feeding, so they were all around the house. Frank was the one we weren’t sure we’d be able to get, given her past escapes, so she was the first one we tried for.

My daughter got her into a carrier way faster than expected!

Frank was NOT happy, once that door was closed!

Sir Robin and Grommet went into the largest carrier together. They were pretty easy to get.

We knew Domino and Blot would be fairly easy, so we tried to focus on Bug, Furriosa and Sweetie.

They were in the isolation shelter, and did not want to get got. Domino and Blot ended up in their own carriers; we’d planned to put Bug and Blot together.

When it became clear they were getting way to stressed, we paused for a while. After making sure the occupied carriers were set near the warmth of the heat lamps, I went to check the oil level on the truck. It was fine. Then I opened the gate and realized I would need to clear the end of the driveway again. The plow went by last night but it didn’t leave a plow ridge. It went by fast enough that the snow was sent flying about half way to the gate!

Still deep enough that it needed to be clear.

By the time that was done, we tried again to get the cats. In the end, my daughter was able to snag Sweetie, but that was the limit. Bug and Furriosa would no longer allow us anywhere near them! I actually got Bug into a carrier twice, but she managed to squeeze through the door before I could close it. That little one is FAST!!

It was a lot earlier than we’d talked about, so I grabbed some breakfast and got on the group chat with the rescue. I let them know the status of things, and that we would not be able to get Bug and Furriosa this time – but that we did get Frank – and we worked out some details.

When it came time to leave, I got the truck out of the garage and my daughter started bringing carriers over.

Frank’s nose is looking bloody in that first photo! I think she was trying to shove her face through the door. She was very angry!

Frank’s carrier rode in the front of the cab, while the other four carriers fit in the back. Sweetie and Frank were both pretty upset. The others seemed quite calm. All of them quieted down during the ride in.

I didn’t make it, though.

I am so tired of this truck.

The route I took would take me through the town my mother is in again. Though the road was plowed, parts of it were pretty icy and it was slow going at times.

I kept an eye on that oil pressure gauge. As I drew near my mother’s town, I knew I wouldn’t make it to the city. Not because the truck was breaking down, but because the gauge just kept dropping and dropping. By the time I got to town, it was reaching the line between “normal” and “low”. At the rate it was dropping, I would have had alarms sounding and warnings flashing well before I reached the city. I’ve had to drive with those going off before, for only short distances, and they are pretty extreme. There’s no way I could keep driving with them going off, but it would also freak out the cats!

As soon as I could, I pulled into the parking lot at a gas station and messaged the rescue group. After explaining the problem, there were some back and forthing, and they worked out who could come and meet me.

They are so incredibly awesome!

Then it was just a matter of waiting.

When they reached me, they had a surprise for me. They had to empty the back of their vehicle to make room for the carriers.

Everything but the teal bag in the middle was donations for the kitties! When I got home and unpacked it all, I found 11 smaller bags of kibble, plus the bigger bag you can see on the left of the photo, four more cases of wet cat food like was donated to use last time, a box with cat treats in it, an unopened case of cat milk and… strangely, but still much appreciated… a partial box of large garbage bags. After the cats were picked up, I was going to go to the feed store, just a short drive away, to pick up three 40 pound bags of kibble. I only needed to pick up one more, instead!

With 6 cats gone, we won’t need as much kibble for the outside cats, too.

This was so, so awesome of them! It’s such a huge help.

We talked for a while, as they were asking about the truck problems, while moving the carriers. It’s so very frustrating, because the truck checked out just fine. When I mentioned that the sensor had already been replaced twice, but they weren’t GM brand, they both reacted in a very knowing way. Apparently, they were both quite familiar with this sort of brand v off brand issue!

Once the cats were safely tucked away and they left, I got a bit of gas ($1.799/L right now), then went to the feed store and got the one bag of kibble. Then, since I was in town and it’s becoming an issue, I went to visit my mother. The hospital the TCU is in was just a few blocks away, too.

After her phone call last night, I was not sure how the visit would go. When I got to her room, though, I had to wait a while, as a new resident was being brought in to the second bed. Once things were clear, I went to my mother, who was napping, and gently woke her up. She was very surprised to see me – and seemed very appreciative, too.

We ended up going to the common room to talk while her new neighbour was settled in. My mother made some eye rolling gestures about her getting a new room mate.

There was another resident in the room when we got there and he joined our conversation for a bit before leaving. After he left, my mother told me about her previous room mate.

It turns out she’d had a fall, and her nose was all bloody. She got herself up but didn’t use the call bell. My mother said she didn’t do anything, because she didn’t want to get involved. ??? In the morning, when the staff found her room mate (who is also 94 years old) was injured, there was a lot of fussing and commotion. The doctor even came over and tended to her.

Then he left.

My mother started to complain that he didn’t talk to her or check on her at all. I said, of course not. He had an injured patient he was tending to! Oh, but he should have talked to her after. I said he would have had to go back to his schedule as soon as possible.

Oh, you’re taking their side…

Uhm… No. I’m just explaining.

My mother says she’s been asking to see the doctor over and over, because of her breathing. I tried to explain that when the doctor comes by to do his rounds, that’s all he’s doing. If she wants to see him for something specific, she would need to make an appointment.

As we were talking, the subject of her hearing loss also came up, because she was struggling to hear me. In the end, I told her I would go to the nursing station and ask about making an appointment with the doctor, and to see what is available for getting her hearing tested.

In the end, they can’t make an “appointment” with the doctor at the TCU. He does his rounds on Tuesdays, and this place is not the only one he has to check on. They basically have a meeting and go over all the files. It turned out that last week was the first time my mother had specifically told them that she was having troubles breathing at night, so that was the first time it was discussed. The decision was made to change one of her medications from a morning dose to an afternoon dose.

The other issue, however, is simply my mother’s weight. She has her hospital bed set to recline, but she squishes herself down low on the bed, so her upper body isn’t as elevated as it should be. I brought up that what would probably help her a lot would be breast reduction surgery, but there’s no way that’ll be done on a 94 year old. The nurse I was talking to agreed.

As for an appointment with the doctor, we might be able to make one for her at the clinic, which is in the same building, but with her file being reviewed weekly, it didn’t seem like something to do.

I could tell there was definitely some exasperation about my mother from the staff that they were trying not to show. I suspect my mother has not been particularly kind to them.

When I asked about hearing tests, they didn’t think there was anyone in the area that did them. It would likely be something that would be done in the city. The nurse did have a suggestion to try first. It could simply be that my mother’s ears are plugged with wax. They could apply oil for a few days then try to clean her ears.

Returning to my mother, I explained about the doctor, and she basically just rolled her eyes. She does not accept that the doctor is responsible for all the other people in TCU with her, plus he has is own clinic patients. She just wants him to be there to see her, when she wants him to be there. She is pretty open about not caring about anyone else (like her injured former room mate!).

Next, I explained to her about them not knowing if there’s anyone that does hearing tests out here, and it would likely be a city thing. Then I mentioned the suggestion for using oil in her ears to start unblocking them. My mother got quite excited about that. She said, she’d had that done before and it helped her so much, so she thinks it will probably help again.

May it be that simple!

We talked a while longer, and then I headed home. As with the drive in, by the time I reached home, that oil pressure needle just kept on slowly dropping the whole way. It seems that the length of time to drive to town – either our usual town or my mother’s town – is about the limit of how far we can drive and be sure not to set off any warnings and alarms.

*sigh*

With the very generous donation we were given, I backed up to the house to unload. The truck handled the deeper snow I hadn’t cleared away quite well – the new differential is doing its job! Though it was early, I did have to feed the outside cats, just to get them away from the truck so I could park it.

I saw both Bug and Furriosa.

They both now run away as soon as I seem to be going in their direction.

They both look very, very unhappy with me!

I’ve since been in contact with the rescue. They’d like me to try and catch them over the next couple of days, still, and would meet me for pick up. We have only the two soft sided carriers right now, but they will work on returning the 5 hard sided ones soon. As much as I’d love to catch them, I don’t see them trusting us enough to do it that quickly!

As for the cats they picked up…

Much to my shock, I was told Sir Robin was all hissy and growling. He was the last one I expected that from! Frank is very angry. That’s not a surprise. Sweetie is very scared and angry, too. Blot was described as a micro kitty! She got a bath, as did Domino. They and Grommet are all rather angry, too, but more scared angry than angry, angry, if that makes sense.

They will all stay together with the rescue’s intake person for the first while, as they get bathed, vaccinated, treated for ear mites and worms (the rescue workers do these on their own), and eventually vetted and the ladies will be spayed. The boys are already neutered. Some will then go to fosters, while others will stay with the intake person a while longer, as more fosters are searched for. They are working on finding someone to take Frank in particular. We’ve already agreed that she can come back here after she’s spayed, if no foster is found, but of course we would prefer it if she got adopted.

As for me, tomorrow I’m going to have to take a chance and go to the town to the north of us, to drop off our tax stuff. That town is just a bit further away, but not enough that that pressure gauge will start setting off alarms.

I messaged the garage while waiting for the rescue folks to reach me, but I’ll be phoning them tomorrow morning as well.

If this doesn’t get resolved soon, I’m going to have to cancel an eye test I’ve got coming up. The town it’s in is about 2/3s of the way to the city, putting it well into the “alarms are going to go off” zone.

I am so tired of this truck – and yet, I really like this truck! It’s the exact vehicle we need.

What we really need is a second vehicle.

I have so many errands I need to drive to, and I at least know I can get to town, but not being able to go as far as the city is a problem.

One of the previous times we had issues with the sensor, the oil pressure gauge stayed at zero, with no alarms going off. It was just dead. I’m at the point where that is actually preferable to what’s happening now!

*sigh*

It’ll work out in the end.

I’ll just hold on to that thought.

The Re-Farmer