dealing with elderly parents

Skipped it!

/ Re-Farmer / 6 Comments

Today, I did NOT go to the city for our Costco stock up trip. I just wasn’t up to it.

This morning was bitterly cold, so I made sure to run the truck and do a scan to make sure it’s still just that sensor turning on the check engine light.

My first stop of the day was my mother’s place to find some clothes to bring to her at the hospital. I’m happy to say, the road conditions were very good, at least!

When I went into my mother’s apartment, the first thing I noticed was the smell of urine. Not overpowering, but very noticeable. So one of the first things I did was check her commode. Sure enough, it had not been emptied. So I took care of that.

After cleaning that up, I went into her kitchen, where I found there had been some food left out. It was covered, and was probably intended to be her supper after the appointment she never came home from. So I had to throw a few things away, then did her dishes. Her fridge was mostly empty – she was definitely ready for a grocery shopping trip, but never told me! – so there wasn’t much to take care of, there. I even remembered to water her single plant. 😁

Then I went looking for her “hospital bag”. She has been using a soft sided, insulated grocery bag for this, probably because it had a zipper closure. Way too small, but at least it would have had some of the stuff she intended to bring, if she found herself going to the ER from home again.

I didn’t find it. I think I found the bag, folded up and put away with other reusable grocery bags, but not what she’d had prepared.

I ended up going to my truck to get a hard sided grocery bag to use, instead. Anything I used had to be very light, which is why she wouldn’t use the very nice (and probably quite expensive) little suitcase my brother got for her to pack for any hospital stays.

As I was trying to figure out where my mother kept her things, I started to hear this very strange noise. A quiet, musical noise.

Coming out of my pocket.

My cell phone was ringing. I almost never use my cell phone as a phone, and even rarely get calls to me on it, so I had no idea what I was hearing! 😂

The call turned out to be from my sister, so I rejected the call, then sent a quick apology text telling her I was in the middle of getting clothes for our mother. When I had a moment, I saw she had left a voicemail message, which I can listen to through my text app, so I did.

She was asking me if I was planning on getting closed for our mother! Too funny.

I had to go through a number of shelves and drawers, as well as her closet, to gather what I thought she would need. Then I found a bag for her toiletries. I considered bringing her bubble packs, but she was almost done – she would have been getting her new bubble packs delivered today, if she were home – so I left them for now.

Eventually, I gathered several changes of clothing and sleepwear (I found her undies stored in a small garbage can! ???) and packed them up. Before heading to town, I paused to get a bit of gas – the prices were $1.479, while in the smaller city yesterday, it was $1.439 – and some food I could eat while driving, then headed to the town my mother is in.

By this time, I’d already decided I wasn’t up to going to the city after visiting my mother. We’re stocked up well enough right now that it isn’t urgent, and I didn’t want to rush my visit with her.

They had told me what room she was in, and that’s where I headed first, only to have someone tell me there was no one in that room. On getting my mother’s name, she looked her up and told me they’d moved her to the opposite end of the hall! The hospital only as 20 or so rooms, all down one hall, so I would have found her eventually, I suppose.

My mother didn’t look very good when I walked in, though. She was sitting on the side of her bed, leaning on the table and holding a cloth over her eyes. She was looking very tired!

She cheered right up when she saw me, though – and even more when I told her I brought clothing for her! I found out that they had only just moved her to this room, too. The room she was in before was a shared room, so after they did another EKG on her today, they moved her to a private room.

That was nice of them!

I’d barely settled into a chair to visit with her when there was a knock at the door, and my sister walked in! She hadn’t seen my message yet, but said she figured I was probably driving to do exactly what she was asking me about. It was my cousin that had phoned my sister, asking about bringing clothes for my mother.

I’m actually a bit upset with my sister, so be honest, but we weren’t going to talk about it in front on my mother. My sister told our vandal that Mom was in the hospital, and he had come to visit Mom pretty much right away. His wife was with him, at least. I found out about the visit through my brother, who was able to visit that same evening. My mother told my brother that our vandal had started talking smack my brother, until Mom started crossing herself repeatedly, and he stopped. I honestly didn’t think our vandal would be up to visiting, since he supposedly just had major, life threatening cancer surgery, but for someone who is supposedly dying of cancer, he’s pretty darn active. He did, however, tell my cousin about Mom being in the hospital, and she’s visited several times already. The hospital is right next to the church we went to when I was a kid, and my cousin is very involved with it, so it’s a simple matter for her to pop over. She even let the priest know, and he came to give my mother communion, which she really appreciated. Unfortunately, my cousin has also been sucked in by our vandal’s claims and has caused other problems as well, so this is not really a good thing, even though my mother enjoys the visits.

My sister and I had a good long visit with my mother. Honestly, I would have probably left earlier, but after what my sister did re: our vandal, I didn’t want to leave them alone together. What a terrible way to have to think! She seems utterly oblivious, though, and even mentioned how happy our vandal was that she told him Mom was in the hospital. Yes, she was like a mother to him, too, but she knows what he’s been doing over the past few years!

Well, it is what it is, and we just have to deal with things as they come.

Meanwhile, we were at least able to help my mother change to a fresh clean shirt. She complained about the lack of a scarf, as she finds it helps her throat, so I went to the truck to see if I had one in our winter clothing bin. I didn’t, but I did have a shawl I’d crocheted that she could drape over her shoulders and around her neck, if she wanted. While I was doing that, I had a chance to talk to her nurse and let them know that my mother was having difficulty changing her clothes – something she mentioned to my brother – but is too proud to bring up with the nursing staff. She “doesn’t want to bother them”.

She had several visits with nursing staff while we were there, and found out a few things being changed with her treatment, so it was a good thing I didn’t bring her bubble packs. The hospital is giving her her medication from their own supply for now, and the doctor is trying her on some new medications, as the old ones don’t seem to be working anymore.

Eventually, though, I could see my mother was getting very tired, so I suggested it was time for us to leave and let her rest. I walked my sister out, but she parked in a very different area, so after we parted ways, I went back to the entrance closer to where I parked.

Which gave me a chance to stop at the nursing station and let them know about our vandal, if he visits again. As long as his wife is with him, he should be okay, but they know that he is never to be with her, unsupervised. She took notes so the other staff would be aware.

Then I remembered something my brother asked me to tell my mother, and went back to see her. Basically, to let her know that if anyone tries to get her to sign something, to tell them to talk to my brother, or to me, first. She’s had people try to coerce her into signing things before – including both our vandal and my cousin – so I made sure to add that if *anyone* tried to get her to sign something, tell them to call my brother or me, first.

Gosh, I hate having to think like this. My mother, however, greatly appreciated the reminder.

By this time, it was getting to be late in the afternoon. Since I didn’t go to the city, I made a quick stop at the grocery store for a couple of things, then headed home.

It was late enough that, once things were unloaded and put away (no need to drive up to the house to unload, this time!), I gave the outside cats their evening feed and warm water.

Fluffy and The Grink were cuddled together on the cat bed in front of the heat lamp, which was nice to see. I also spotted a pink collar on a black cat among the crowd in the sun room, so Midnight has returned. I had to be sneaky about it, but managed to get a quick peak at his nethers. Just enough to confirm no sign of infection.

I had been keeping my brother up to date, to a certain extent. He and my SIL were driving out to visit my mother this evening, so he called while they were driving, so I could update them both on speakerphone.

After all the updated, I had one unrelated thing to bring up with my brother.

A recent, strange thudding sound I’ve been hearing that seems to be coming from the furnace.

It’s almost random. The only pattern I can see is that it starts happening after the furnace has been on for a while, though when the furnace turns off, I usually hear one last thump. Stranger still is that I’ve heard the thumping even when the furnace has not been on for some time. Yet it still seems to be coming from the furnace.

We have two furnaces. There’s the wood burning furnace, that can no longer be used. My brother had to seal the door with metal strapping and send the insurance company pictures as proof, otherwise, they would not have insured the house. When the new roof was installed, the old chimney for the wood furnace was removed at the top, and the opening sealed.

The other furnace is electric, and attached to the wood furnace. This way, if the fire died down in the wood furnace and it got cold, it would automatically switch to the electric furnace, which sends the warm air through the wood burning furnace to use the same ducts. This meant my dad wouldn’t have to go into the basement during the night to load the wood burning furnace anymore and, eventually, he just used the electric. So we have two thermostats on the wall, too. The one for the wood burning furnace is off, and we just use the one for the electric furnace.

With this new thumping noise, I am very perplexed. I’ve even started to try dashing (ha! As much as I can dash) to the basement, in hopes that the noise would happen again while I’m down there.

I have yet to hear it while I’m in the basement.

I’ve tried looking up possible causes, but none apply to our furnace. Some applied to gas furnaces, not electric. Others applied to a belt motor, but this one doesn’t have a belt. Other possibilities mentioned the sound happening when the furnace first starts, and this noise happens after the furnace has been running for a while. Etc.

I am totally perplexed.

As I described it to them and answered their questions, they were equally perplexed.

In the end, the one thing my brother could think of was to remove the chain from the damper on the old furnace. The old furnace has its own internal thermostat, which can’t really be turned off, so it might be acting up and trying to open the damper or something. It seems unlikely, but we can’t think of anything else.

So I’ve done that. I’ve since turned the electric furnace’s thermostat back up again a bit, so it’ll turn on sooner.

~~~ pause for the noise happening again ~~~

Okay, I think we figured it out.

I kept going into the basement to listen to the noise, only for it to happen after I’ve gone back upstairs. In fact, just as I reached the top of the stairs.

I finally got my daughter to walk around while I was downstairs.

It’s the floor. The floor joist (it’s all exposed) is in direct contact with the metal at the top of the furnace.

My daughter even found a spot to make the noise happen repeatedly, but it doesn’t seem to be just one spot. It happened while I was moving around in front of the doorway to my husband’s bedroom. The subfloor boards are diagonal, so I could simply have been standing on a different spot over the same board.

Which means, when I’m hearing it go off, it has nothing to do with the furnace being on. It might actually just be one of the heavier cats walking past the basement door, or even the floor shifting with temperature changes. The house shifting might also explain why it’s happening now, when it hadn’t happened before.

That is NOT what I expected at all.

I’ve got to tell my brother about this!

That is just the strangest thing ever.

Now I have to wonder if the floor shifting – sagging? – can actually damage the furnace!

Good grief, this house has some of the strangest problems creep up!

Time to go update my brother!

The Re-Farmer

Not a stock up trip: this is what $262 looks like, ER visit and nasty road conditions (unrelated!)

/ Re-Farmer / 5 Comments

My goodness, how things can change in a short time!

Today was supposed to be my day to do our first stock up shopping trip in the city. There’s one major street with several stores I go to that are all conveniently in a row. I save the Costco shopping for another trip.

Then I got a phone call yesterday, late afternoon.

Against our advice, my mother had made an appointment with the doctor in the hospital clinic near her place. They have one doctor that comes in one day a week. That appointment was yesterday afternoon, and a friend from church was driving her. We’ve advised against it as we’ve started the process to try and get her into long term care, and switching doctors could slow that down, but we can’t stop her if she decides otherwise. When she told me about the appointment, I just asked her to call me after and let me know if she had officially switched doctors, so I could call home care and let them know. The only reason she’d told me about it was because I’d called her to pass on a message from the home care coordinator! She had just gotten home from the walk in clinic when I called. She was having issues with her breathing again, which she says has been getting worse. From what I’ve seen the last couple of times I’ve been with her, it definitely has, though she still says it’s the worst when she’s lying down in bed. Apparently, they didn’t actually see her, but made an appointment for the next day.

I didn’t get a call from my mother.

I got a call from the ER in the hospital in her town, instead.

She’d gone to the clinic, but it turned out the appointment was with a nurse practitioner, because the doctor wasn’t there that day. After checking on her and hearing her complaints, he sent her to the ER. They were treating her on the assumption of heart failure, based on the symptoms she described, which she told them she’d had for only a couple of weeks.

She’s been complaining about these symptoms for longer than we’ve been back in this province.

I spoke to the nurse for a while, as my mother was having difficulties remembering her medical history. She asked about the contact numbers they had on file, so I also let them know that I was the nearest of my siblings and to call me first but, if things got to such a point, my brother is PoA, so he would be the one to call for decision making authority. Since this hospital doesn’t have a doctor, they were in the process of doing an EKG, and where then going to transfer her to the nearest ER.

An ER with a doctor.

She mentioned the two most likely ER location possibilities, one of which my mother would probably refuse to go back to, so I filled in about that, too, and why. After we spoke, she told me she would call back once they knew where she would be going.

Which turned out to be the hospital we are closest to.

So much of my evening was spent keeping on top of things and updating my siblings. By the final call I made to the hospital my mother was transferred to, it was concluded that my mother had pulmonary edema.

I had remembered and made sure to call them earlier about the kidney function issues my mother had, some time ago, and this was why she was no longer on water pills. By then, they’d already figured it out.

Pulmonary edema certainly explain her breathing problems!

So my plans changed for today. I was originally going to go to the post office for some packages that came in yesterday, then head towards town to take a particular highway straight into the city and the street with the stores I meant to go to. Instead, I would go to into town to see my mother at the hospital (after phoning to confirm where she was and what room she was assigned to), then go to the city.

After our very warm day, followed by a colder one yesterday, I started seeing all sorts of reports for poor highway conditions, today. All that melting resulted in roads that were icy and snow packed. Today was supposed to be a bit warmer again, but the high winds were back, so now there was blowing snow on top of everything else.

At that point, I was going to decide whether I would go to the city or not, based on what the conditions were like when I got to the hospital to see my mother.

The east-west road to town was not too bad; there were icy patches. Enough to drive below the speed limit, but nothing too excessive – until I got closer to town, when it was all ice.

Then I got to the junction for the highway I would have been taking to go to the city.

It was barricaded in one direction with vehicles, warning cones, people in high viz vests, and a sign saying “emergency scene ahead”. Wherever the emergency scene was, though, it was too far away to see from this intersection. The cross roads are every mile, so that’s not surprising.

My brother was talking about visiting my mother after work, if the roads were safe, so once I parked at the hospital, I updated my siblings on road conditions, as well as posting on the highway conditions group I’m on.

As for my mother, though she has been admitted, she was still in their ER and not yet transferred to her room. They had just finished doing another series of tests on her.

She’s actually doing really well.

She was still wired for EKG; they just need to plug her in for the next test. She had an IV port, but no IV. They’d given her the IV version of her old water pills, and she was already feeling a difference. They’re going to do bloodwork repeatedly to figure out what’s going on with her. She expects to be there for just a few days, though typically, someone admitted with her symptoms would be there for a week.

We had a good visit, and I told her I’ve been keeping my siblings up to day. I also told her about my brother hoping to visit this evening, if road conditions are safe, but they didn’t seem to be. I even checked again while she went to the washroom and found more recent updates from people saying how icy the conditions were on the highways.

As for that accident scene, it turned out a couple of miles of highway was shut down, and the medical helicopter from the city had to be brought in!

My mother said she was just fine without any visits!!

I had already decided by then that I would NOT be going to the city. I’m going to be in the nearer city tomorrow, after dropping the cats off at the vet, anyhow, so I can do most of the stock up shopping there.

After having a good visit with my rather indestructible mother (seriously. She’s amazing), I headed to the local grocery store, instead. I was just going to pick up a few things to tide us over and then head home.

Well, I ended up going an almost stock up trip. I took advantage of a lot of sales.

This is what $262.32 looks like.

Quite a lot of stuff is buried and can’t be seen in the photo.

Because of all the sales, I found myself with a ridiculously long receipt, and had to take two pictures to make it manageable. Here’s the top half.

The cat food was one necessity. We’ve still got feed store kibble, but the inside cats will not eat it! Even the outside cats don’t like this particular brand of feed store kibble, though they do like the other brand this feed store carries. So I got two 8kg bags of house brand kibble, which was a lot more affordable. Hopefully, the cats will actually eat it!

The Basmati rice is for my husband, as we’re low and that’s usually a Costco item. He does love his rice!

My daughter requested and sent funds for energy drinks. The cases of 4 were on sale, so I got two. At Costco, I will pick up a flat for her. The Coke Zero is for my husband and I.

My husband requested nacho fixings and there were sales on, so I got four bags of nacho chips, in hopes to have enough unbroken chips to make a decent sized batch of nachos! The salsa dip is for him as well.

I even remembered to grab garlic powder, as we ran out.

The pre-sliced olives were for the nachos. The canned fruit cocktail was a good sale, so I picked those up as a pantry treat.

I don’t normally buy cereal, but do pick it up as a treat when it’s on sale. Two boxes are in flavours my daughters like, two for my husband and I.

I got a flat of eggs, because we always need eggs. The blocks of cheese were on sale, so I got one regular and one lactose free. We still had cheese at home, but since we’re making nachos, we’ll be using up a lot more than usual in a short time.

I got only 1 pound of butter because it was on sale. I’ll pick up the month’s supply at Costco.

Since we got cereal, I got more regular milk and oat milk. The frozen perogies were another sale item that also got me extra points on my Scene card. The rice crackers were for my husband. It doesn’t show, but those were on sale, as was the bag of McIntosh apples and the baby spinach.

The bacon was also on sale, plus there was a points bonus, so I got two packages. Same with the hot dog wieners. Which means I had to get hot dog buns, which were not on sale. It amazes me that the buns cost more than the wieners! I picked up a couple of loaves of Texas Toast bread, so I got some sliced meats for sandwiches. They are “pizza” meats, but they’ll make good sandwiches, too.

I also picked up more dips for the nachos that my daughters and I like; a 6 layer dip and an artichoke asiago dip.

That made my bill a total of $262.32 after taxes for 43 items, while my total discounts and savings was $57.66, for a 19% savings. I also earned 1230 points with just this trip, which more than doubled my balance. I save the points for times when getting cash off my groceries will be an extra help. As of right now, I could get $20 off, but I’ll save that for a tighter month.

So I ended up getting more than planned, with a lot of things I don’t get very often. We could easily go for some time without a full stock up trip, but after I drop off the cats at the vet tomorrow, I will be close to both a Walmart and a Canadian Tire, which is where I will get specific stock up items without the big city trip. I had been looking forward to going to the international grocery store in the city, as today is the last day for some promotions and sales, but I’ll just have to miss them this time. The Costco trip might be on Friday, or on the weekend.

As for tomorrow, I’m really hoping the roads improve, because there is no way I’m skipping getting the cats to the vet. The rescue set this up for us, and I’d hate to be a no-show. The Cat Lady would understand, but the vet gets so many no-shows, they’ve had to start banning people from their cheap spay days for it. I don’t want to get the Cat Lady in trouble with one of the few vets that gives her such decent discounts! Plus, I will be meeting the Cat Lady, then later on will meet with someone from a feral and stray cats group that has some donated cat food for us.

I would normally live an hour before drop off time, even though it typically takes 45-55 minutes to get to the nearer city, but with potentially bad road conditions, I will plan on leaving even earlier.

I just really hope we can catch either Brussel or the fluffy lady – the ones I am sure are pregnant right now. Sprout has shown up again and had the boys following her around. The last time I saw her, the boys were no longer following her, so she probably is, too. No possibility of catching her without a trap, though. The fluffy lady is our best bet to catch, I think. We’re booked for one male and one female, and we will bring in whichever ones we can snag!

Well, that’s where things stand today. I’ll be calling the hospital again later today to see if there are any updates on my mother. I don’t expect my brother or sister to make the drive out to visit, but there is another highway they could take that is supposed to be in better condition, so we’ll see. Unfortunately, since I’ll be having cats in the truck with me, I won’t be able to visit my mother tomorrow. We’ll see how things go over the next few days.

What would be ideal is for the home care panel to see what’s going on with my mother and this will be enough to get her into the nursing home she wants to be in! That would make her so happy.

We shall see!

The Re-Farmer

A much more effective shop, plus updates

/ Re-Farmer / 2 Comments

Yesterday, while in a much larger town, I did a bit of grocery stopping. Just a few things to tide us over until we do our first big stock up shop in the city next week. The grocery store I went to has a really good inventory, and I would have loved to get more, but everything was too expensive.

What I forgot to do was bring our water jugs for refilling, so I needed to do that today. Being a much warmer day, I called my mother to see if she needed any errands done, or if she were up to going to the bank.

Thanks go her Meals on Wheels three times a week, her groceries stretch quite a lot further, so all she needed was milk. The only other thing she wanted were some croissants to go with her tea. She discovered croissants only recently and just loves them, and sometimes the grocery store in her town has some excellent prices on them.

So I decided I would get my water refills at her local grocery store, then maybe pick up the sandwich meats they have that are prices better than I’ve seen anywhere else, including the city, on top of my mother’s two items. She was getting her Meals on Wheels today, so I was going to pick up my own lunch of fried chicken at the gas station before going to her place.

Once at the grocery store, I had time to spare before I knew the gas station’s fried chicken would be ready, so I took my time and looked around.

What a difference from yesterday! This grocery store not only had better regular prices, but there were sale prices that were just awesome. Where, yesterday, I didn’t get the extras I would have wanted to, today I got extras I never expected to pick up!

I didn’t get a chance to get a photo before everything was packed up, so here’s just a picture of the reciept.

From the top, the first item is a jar of sliced pickles for sandwiches. The Dawn Ultra is for our basement, to clean the septic pump’s filter basket.

The “bakery reduced” is three bags of croissants for my mother, that cost only $1.75 each. This is even better than Superstore in the city, where they have clamshells of croissants available for $5, which is a great price, but far fewer croissants for the price compared to the tree bags I got. The 2L of milk was hers, too.

The boneless pork was one of the amazing sale prices; you can see on the receipt that the sale price discounted over $17 – more than half price for a very good sized roast! It was the thing with the fresh chicken legs and thighs. I ended up getting two packages of those. If I’d had the budget for it, I would have gotten more!

I got around 500 grams each of the sliced deli meats; the maple ham was a touch under, while the two chicken breasts were a touch over. That is their regular price, which is about $2/100g lower than most places.

The instant pudding was a spur of the moment thing. Four boxes for $5 is a really excellent price, as you can see by the amount discounted. While I just got a flat of 30 eggs yesterday, when I saw that the 18’s of house brand eggs were priced lower than a dozen, I just had to grab one. We can never have too many eggs! The rye breads are regular price; the same brand and price that we get at Walmart.

The water refills were the one thing that is more expensive, both the new caps and the water itself.

So of all this, $9.44 was for my mother. Which means that, of the $106.60 total, after taxes, we paid only $97.16 for our own stuff.

Which was a heck of a lot more than what we paid almost $130 for, yesterday! Particularly since I ended up getting so much meat on this trip!

After I finished the shopping, making sure to bag my mother’s stuff separately, I had time to spare before I would go to the gas station to pick up some fried chicken and wedges for lunch, so I went to a small department store to see what they had. I remembered there were a couple of things my mother wanted from there. One was a candle, for when she says her prayers. The other were slipper socks of some kind. Her feet get cold at night, so she wanted something she could sleep with. I actually found both, though I’m not sure if the slipper socks will work for her. They are supposed to be one size fits all, but my mother has massive bunions, and that might be a problem. We shall see.

I still had extra time, so I parked at the gas station and messaged with my brother for a bit. When I did my morning rounds, I checked the ejector, as he asked, but the pump hadn’t gone off during the night, so there was just fresh snow in front of it. I did feel the heat tape and it was warm, so that’s still working. Before I left home, I made sure to top up the filter on the septic pump and asked my family to keep an ear out for it, as it would probably go off while someone was taking a shower.

After updating my brother on things, I went inside, only to find all the chafing dishes were completely empty. Not even the potato wedges or deep fried perogies and pizza pops that get cooked first were there.

It turns out their frier was on the fritz. The food was being cooked, but it would be a while before anything would be ready.

Thankfully, they had a bank machine, so I took some cash out and went to the Chinese restaurant next to my mother. They are cash only. It’s been a few months since I’ve gotten anything there, so I was far from unhappy with having to change plans.

From there, I finally went to my mother’s. Today was warm enough that I didn’t need to worry about my groceries and the water jugs freezing in the truck cab.

Since I was able to get what my mother needed along with my own stuff, after we had lunch, I did other errands for her. It was her day to do laundry, so I changed her bedding for her, which was enough to make two loads for her. Once those were started, I did some light housework for her, and all those little things that she now finds difficult to do. The one unusual thing was trying to figure out why her TV wasn’t working After trying various things, it just kept reverting to a message saying to check the network connections. I checked everything I could think of before I finally took a picture of the message on the screen and sent it to my brother; he bought her this TV and did all the setting up, so he knows it a lot better than I do. A quick message back from him, and I found the setting that my mother somehow accidentally turned off. She has a habit of button mashing her remote control when things don’t work the way she expects, but when things go wrong, she has no idea what she did that caused it!

All in all, we were able to have a pretty good visit today, which is really unusual for the length of time that I was there. I really appreciate days like today. No personal attacks. No attacks on my family. Only mild attempts to attack my brother that I could easily address. No racist rants or bizarrely conflated topics she likes to rage about, even though she has no idea that she’s talking about completely different things. She still can’t figure out why she’s getting fundraising mail from a political party she is no longer a member of. I’ve told her, she’s on a mailing list and would need to ask to be removed. She things that “the government” (meaning, the federal government) is spending all this money to mail things out using taxpayer dollars. I’ve tried to explain to her that party mail is paid for by party members and party donations. They cannot use federal funds for stuff like this. I can tell she simply does not understand what I’m trying to explain.

One thing she did bring up is that she is noticing her own cognitive decline. She’s still convinced that she is dying, and told me she’s feeling all sort of pains, but it’s different now. How is it different? All she could do was vaguely gesture at her chest and stomach. She just doesn’t have the vocabulary, or understanding of anatomy, to explain what she is feeling and where. Aside from that, though, she’s finding it harder to remember words she uses regularly.

She’s still doing pretty darn good for being 93 years old! She does acknowledge that and is grateful for it. But she does need to be in assisted living of some kind!

At least she does live in town, and has home care coming in three times a day for medical assist with her prescriptions. The help she needs, though, home care out here cannot provide, nor can my siblings and I.

So we do the best we can. In the end, my mother really is doing amazingly well to still be living independently! I would not be at all surprised if she outlives us all. 😄

Anyhow.

Once done at my mothers, I got home while it was still light out (I am SO loving the longer days!). After the truck was unloaded, I made sure to check the ejector. The pump had gone off while my daughter was showering, and I could see by the melted splash area that the ejector still has a decent amount of pressure behind it.

On checking the pump, I saw the water level in the filter was getting low, so I topped it up again. After putting the lid back on, I could see air bubbling in from the intake opening as it started to drain. It has to be the back valve again. I took some video of the bubbling and updated my brother about it. He’s not saying much but, knowing him, he’ll probably find a way to come out this weekend to look at it again.

Tomorrow, though, we have to do a much needed trip to the dump, since we didn’t do it during our recent deep freeze. The dump is open longer hours on Saturdays, and I hope to get that done as early as possible. We’re supposed to be colder tomorrow, but nothing extreme. For the next while, it’s going to feel like spring!

I’m quite looking forward to it.

The Re-Farmer

More driving today… and tomorrow, and the day after, and then…

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You know, it’s a good thing my “job” is to take care of this place. Otherwise, I have no idea how I’d manage to get things done.

Things like unexpected shopping trips.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. First, the cuteness!

There was one heck of a crowd in the isolation shelter when I came back from doing my morning rounds! As I came closer to the shelter, some of the more feral cats ran away, leaving “only” eleven left in the upper level of the shelter. I think there might have been as many as fifteen cats, crammed into that upper level, as I was walking up to the shelter!

Once I was back inside and having my breakfast, my daughter suddenly came in with her phone. She’d been wanting to book a follow up visit with her doctor today, which was on my morning to-do list, as I wanted to book a meet and greet for myself, too. The doctor I’m seeing now is still the interim doctor. It may be convenient having the same doctor as my mother, but we’re working to get my mother into assisted living, and it would be more convenient to have the same doctor as my daughter. That and the clinic is right next to a grocery store, which is extra handy. 😄

Well, the clinic called her cell phone (I’m shocked they got through!), and she was wondering what date worked for me to drive in. So I talked to the receptionist and booked a double appointment for us. After the call, my daughter asked, who goes first? I told her, I would, and then I could go to the grocery store if we needed anything, while she had her appointment. It’s been a long time since I’ve had my bloodwork done, though, so I won’t be surprised if I get a requisition for that to be done. There is a lab in the pharmacy right at the clinic, too.

After the call and while finishing breakfast, I was wrestling with myself. There were a few things I wasn’t able to get at the grocery store yesterday. If I left early enough, I might be able to find them before they sold out. Mostly, I was looking to get a party tray of fresh vegetables, and maybe another of fruit, to go with our finger food New Year’s celebration. Plus a flat of eggs. With tomorrow being New Year’s Eve, I knew things would be busy and things would sell out fast, but none of it was necessary, and I really didn’t want to go.

Then my mother phoned.

She was worried about her MRI appointment on the first. It’s a big holiday, and everybody has the day off, so there must be some sort of mistake. I told her, hospitals don’t have the day off. Oh, for emergencies, sure, she tells me. I finally asked, are you wanting me to cancel the appointment? Oh… no… but are you sure there’s no mistake?

I assured her that, when I got the call, I did ask because the appointment was on New Year’s day. They confirmed.

Then she started talking about how, when she looks into her fridge, it’s looking pretty empty.

Did she want me to come over?

Oh, no, she tells me. Then starts listing off all the stuff she still has (even after telling me she was out of various things). Plus, it’s cold, and she also needs to go to the bank, and she doesn’t want to go out in the cold. Plus, today is Bingo day.

I told her, it’s going to start getting colder again after New Year’s. Looking at my calendar, I added, it’s either today or Thursday, and it’s supposed to be colder on Thursday.

She hemmed and hawed some more.

Finally I told her to just start her list, because I can come over today. She was getting her Meals on Wheels today, so I told her I would be there for about 1pm, after she had a chance to eat.

I ended up leaving early enough to do my own shopping first. This little grocery store doesn’t do party trays, so I ended up getting some fresh vegetables to make our own party tray, some grapes to go with our charcuterie board, plus a few other things. Then, because the price was right, I picked up a 2 pack of frying chickens for less than a single chicken normally is. The Instant Pot I got for my daughters is big enough to fit a whole chicken in it, so that would work out well.

(As I write this, I can hear the pot venting away; they’ve started a pot roast for the first meal with it!)

From there, I put some gas in the tank (we’re going through a lot more gas than usual, with all the extra driving around!), got my own lunch to eat in the truck (the truck seats are more comfortable) and still ended up at my mother’s about half an hour early.

When I got there, she was in the lobby, looking for something.

She was wondering why bingo wasn’t set up yet.

I asked how she was doing, and she was silent, making motions and acting like there was some reason not to speak out loud. Finally, she said, it’s better not to say.

So…. I guess that meant she wasn’t feeling well?

She did manage to tell me that she wasn’t up to going out and would just give me her list. Then she was going on about where bingo was one or not, then knocking on a neighbour’s door right by the common room to ask him if he knew if it was still on. He didn’t, and seemed confused that she was asking him. She told him she could just phone, instead. I told her, it’s barely past 12:30. It’s probably still too early, thinking it started at 1, but nope: turns out it starts at 1:30. Way too early to be setting up!

I managed to get her back to her place and, as soon as she sat down, she started digging around for a phone number. I eventually figured out she meant to call the senior’s center (they run the social events in her building) to find out if bingo was still on. I told her, why bother calling? Just go over at 1:30 and see. It’s either on or it isn’t, but there’s no need to call. She agreed that she could do that.

Then we went over her list, she gave me funds for her shopping, and I was soon off. The shopping is a lot faster when it’s just me using her list. When I got back and made my way through the common room, I saw that they were starting to set up for bingo! 😄

I made sure to tell her that, when I got to her place. After putting away her groceries, there was time for a bit of a visit before bingo started. As we were talking, she told me how her breathing issues seem to be connected to how much commotion is going on. After asking some questions, it seems like a stress response. The problem is, my mother is creating a lot of her own stress, like worrying about there being a mistake with her MRI appointment (this isn’t the first time she’s done that with appointments, so it’s not just about it being on New Year’s day), or that bingo was cancelled because nothing was set up an hour in advance.

Then she started talking about her vision. Oh, her vision. It’s getting worse.

Now this set off all sorts of alarm bells with me. With her wet macular degeneration, we were advised to monitor it closely and, if it starts getting worse, to get her back to the eye clinic in the city right away. So of course, I started asking more specific questions.

As she started talking about how her vision is getting worse, she casually mentioned that the “black spot” is gone…

Wait… what???? !!!!

Then she mentioned the wavy lines are gone.

????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The wavy lines were from dry macular degeneration in her left eye. She’s taking special vitamins to keep that from getting worse. For those to be gone is amazing, but not as amazing as for her to say the “black spot” in her right eye is gone!

I got her to cover her left eye, then held my hand about two feet from her face, raising two fingers. I asked her, can you see the two fingers?

Yes, she tells me.

I raise a third finger without saying anything.

Three fingers, she tells me.

I’m totally shocked that she could see any fingers at all!

I moved my had back another couple of feet and tried again.

She couldn’t tell me how many fingers, but she could see that “something” was there.

I am totally blown away. While at the clinic with her, less than a month ago, a tech did the same test with her, and she couldn’t see his fingers. When he had her try and look at a single letter on the eye chart, she saw nothing at all.

The eye doctor had told her she shouldn’t need more injections, but also that her eye would not get better. There is scar tissue that will not go away. The injections were to keep it from getting worse, but that we shouldn’t expect it to get better. Her next appointment is in February, and we are to monitor her and bring her back if it gets worse.

Now, it seems her vision around that scarred area in her eye has healed enough that she can see more.

But, she told me, her vision is getting worse. It’s getting “dimmer”. I tried to ask questions to get a better idea of what she meant, but she started getting really frustrated. She simply doesn’t have the vocabulary to tell me what she means. So we dropped that part.

She’s been wearing her old glasses, though, since she decided the eye doctor she got her prescription from gave her a bad prescription and cheated her (they treated her like gold). I suggested that tomorrow, she try wearing her new glasses, as those would have the most up to date prescription. She agreed that it was worth a try.

Hopefully, she will remember to do it in the morning.

Then there was a knock at the door. One of her neighbours had come over to let her know, bingo would be starting soon!

So we said our goodbyes, and I headed home.

By then, it was pretty much time to do my evening rounds, so I headed out and topped up the kibble and warm water for the outside cats.

I just had to get a picture of these two.

The one in the freshly emptied food bowl is Magda. She is pretty friendly and lets us pick her some and sometimes even carry her.

The one above her, with the black splotches on its nose and mouth, has been named Ink by the girls. It also has black splotches on its front paws. The girls think it looks like he’s been playing with a pot of ink, so that’s what they’ve named him.

Or her.

He’s pretty feral and won’t let us anywhere near him to find out, one way or the other!

Oh, there was one other unexpected thing today.

Not long ago, my daughter tried to log into her bank account and found it locked. I got a message from her while I was on my way home. She’d gotten through to the bank on the phone and discovered that someone tried to use her debit card number (she has no credit card) at a restaurant in the US. !!! It was stopped and her accounted locked as potential fraud, so nothing was taken from her bank account, thank God!

She would, however, need to go to a branch and get a replacement card.

As soon as I could, I called the branch in my mother’s town to confirm their hours. They are open tomorrow.

Which means that, tomorrow, I will be driving my daughter to our bank branch in my mother’s town (we won’t be able to do that much longer; I hear this branch will be closing!).

Then, the day after tomorrow – New Year’s Day – I will be taking my mother to her MRI appointment.

Then, on the 2nd, my husband and I will be going to trade his phone in before they ding him with the end-of-contract bill of almost $700. It has to be done before the 4th, and that’s the only day I’ve got left.

The next day, Friday, I’m taking the truck in to get the MAF sensor and block heater cord replaced.

Then, on the following Monday, I’m taking my mother to her regular doctor for a follow up appointment.

Then, on the Wednesday, I’m going back to the same town, but a different clinic, for the joint appointment for me and my daughter.

I’m doing as much driving in the next couple of weeks as I would normally do in a month in the summer. In the winter, I try to do as little driving as possible, but that’s just not working out!

Thank God winter has been mild and conditions pretty good, so far. Based on the 10 day forecast, though, that joint appointment is going to be on a day where the high is expected to be -24C/-13F, while the lows are supposed to be -29C/-20F.

At least we’ll be able to plug in the block heater by then! That’s being replaced on Friday, and Thursday night is when overnight lows are starting to dip below -20C/-4F again.

Weirdly, the long term forecast now says we’ll have about 10 days of that, then 10 days or so of temperatures rising to just below freezing again. This is a La Nińa winter, though, and the system should start affecting our area more over the next couple of months. For our region, that usually means colder temperatures, but it looks like we’re going to be getting temperature whiplash, instead!

Once we get past that last appointment, I hope to not have to do anything more than short trips into town – and hardly any of those! – until it’s time to go more stock up shopping at the end of January!

I just want to stay home.

The Re-Farmer

A quick change in plans

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Today, I’d hoped to stay home for a few days (I really, really didn’t want to go to the dump today!) but when my husband needed something from the pharmacy, I figured I’d do that right away, since it was supposed to be milder. The next couple of days are supposed to get much colder.

A high of -9C/16F is milder, right?

It seemed all right when I headed out to feed the outside cats.

We had a light dusting of snow, but it wasn’t bad.

The full belly kitties were content to stay in the sun room. Not all of them, but enough to make nice, warm cuddle puddles!

The isolation kittens are doing fine, too.

It was a different story, once I started heading to town!

The first thing I realized was that the driveway needed to be cleared. Best to do it while the snow is still light and fluffy, too. Much easier on little Spewie. After closing the gate behind me, I made sure to message the family about that, because I knew I would forget once I got going again.

Driving conditions really sucked!

Once on the main gravel road, visibility was low with blowing snow, made all the more interesting when I had to cross paths with oncoming trucks bringing in bales. The trucks alone are wide loads, but their trailers were loaded 3 round bales wide. To fit them, about a third of a bale sticks out on each side of the trailers, adding about 3 feet to the total width. The main gravel road is wide enough for two vehicles to pass each other well enough, with room to spare, but it’s a very different story with these trucks! They did try to go to the side as far as they could, but with how slippery things can be under the snow, it wouldn’t take much to hit some ice on the shoulder and slide right into the ditches… and these ditches are narrow, steep and deep!

Even on the highway, it wasn’t much better. I found myself doing 70-80 kph (43-50mph) in a 100 (62mph) zone – and no one was trying to pass me!

I’m glad the roads were plowed yesterday, or it would have been so much worse!

Once in town, I did my errands, with my last stop at the grocery store. My husband had called in a prescription delivery for Thursday that I was able to pick up today, instead. At the grocery store, after refilling a couple of our 18.9L/5 gallon water jugs, I ended up taking advantage of some sales and picked up a few extra things besides what was on my list, and my older daughter’s list that she send funds for, once she found out I was going into town. Poor thing is not feeling well at all, today. PCOS sucks.

The drive home was not any better than the drive out, so it was slow going. I’ve driven in far worse. I just didn’t want to be driving at all today! Ah, well.

With the water jugs on top of everything else, I drove up to the house to unload, but had some troubles backing up to the main doors. The truck had to go over the sidewalk from the house to the gate, which was shoveled, and it was just too slippery!

I was quite happy to be parking the truck back in the garage!

My younger daughter was a sweetheart and took care of clearing the driveway after everything was put away, and the outside cats got a light feeding to keep them distracted. The isolation kitties seem very content in their shelter. I was even able to pet the fluffball! He started to run away, but once I started petting his back, he stopped and let me!

I’m going to be worrying about them over the next while, though. As I was writing this, I could see the temperature on my task bar dropping. We’re down to -14C/7F right now, but the wind chill is -30C/-22F!

The isolation kittens are protected from the wind, so that shouldn’t affect the heat lamps ability to keep them warm, but we’re supposed to drop to -25C/-13F tonight, and the high tomorrow is supposed to only reach -23C/-9F, with an overnight low of -26C/-15F, before wind chill. The next day is supposed to be slightly warmer, before our highs are supposed to get back into the single digits below freezing (Celsius).

Those would be good days to stay home, but I’m expecting to pick up our 1/8 beef share on one of those days. I’m just waiting on an email to confirm the date.

I hadn’t been home for long, when I got a phone call from my mother.

Guess who had just showed up at her place?

*sigh*

Yup. Our vandal. My surprising him by being there yesterday didn’t scare him off for long.

My mother was in the common room, though, and our neighbour was with him again, so he was on his best behaviour. Apparently, he was in the nearer city for “treatment” (chemotherapy?) so they stopped by on the way home.

I’m glad my mother called me as soon as she got back into her apartment after they left. In the past, she wouldn’t tell us if he showed up, even when he was alone and his behaviour was verbally abusive.

Then she told me that the doctor that was supposed to call her at 2pm, did finally call! It was past 4pm by the time he did. Thankfully, my mother still remembered our conversation, and on telling him how things went, his recommendation was exactly what I said was most likely. He wanted to increase the dose of the medication.

Then my mother, being the way she is, asked him if she could just stop taking them. What would happen? His response was, probably nothing would change. She could stop taking them, if she wanted, but to call him again if things got worse.

*sigh*

I just had to express my frustrations with her, as carefully as I could. She keeps complaining about all sorts of health problems, but when people try to help her, she won’t do the things that she is supposed to do to make things better. When we first moved out here, she mostly complained about her knees, but refused to wear the braces my brother got for her (as recommended by her doctor at the time), for her knee that’s bent sideways. I forget it he got two or three different braces, trying to find one she was willing to wear, but she wouldn’t. Instead, she would wear sport knee pads. They kept her knees warm, therefore, in her mind, they were helping her knees more than the brace.

It’s the same thing with this new medication. I tried to explain again, it takes time to see if a specific medication would work, and at what dose. As an example, I told her how my husband it still trying to get the dose right on the new pain medication he’s on (the previous one is no longer available), and it’s been about a year. Her response was to start talking about how much she pities us for him having health problems, but I had to cut that off. I told her, this was just an example of something that is common. Everyone is different, so they have to take the time to figure out exactly what will work for each person.

Her bubble packs are due for new ones, and the doctor would be faxing the increased dosage to her pharmacy, so I told her that when she gets her new bubble packs, they should have the new dosage, and nothing would change. Just keep taking her prescriptions as always, and give it time to work.

I don’t know if I got through to her. I might have, at least for a little while.

I’m so glad she has homecare doing med assists, now. Even with the bubble packs, she was messing with her prescriptions. Which is more of a problem because she forgets what some of them are for, and gets them mixed up.

I need to remember to call the home care office and see where her application for assisted living or a nursing home is at! There’s only so much my siblings and I can do to help her. Especially when she isn’t willing to help herself at times!

So today didn’t turn out the way it was intended to, but things got done and, more importantly, my mom is okay after our vandal showing up at her place again.

I really, really wish she would just tell him to not come around anymore, but she still holds out home that things will get better.

Another reason to get her into some sort of long term care! She can move to a better living situation, and no one needs to tell him where she is. As long as she doesn’t tell him herself, of course. 🫤🙄

Ah, well. It is what it is! All we can do is deal with the cards we’ve got.

The Re-Farmer

Well now…

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… I am extra glad I had to go to my mother’s place today!

The trip itself was not particularly pleasant. We had that super warm day when everything melted, then we got snow on top of that. Yesterday, the southwestern part of our province was hit with a snow storm, but we were fortunate. I saw photos and video people shared on FB, and the one that blew me away was the sand truck – upside down in a ditch!

We got snow, but no storm. When I headed out, the roads were not plowed yet, though I could see the plow trucks were out. While our temperatures were below freezing, between the traffic and the darker surface, the highways were melting in patches, making things even more potentially dangerous. I took it slow, and was pleased to see, most of the other traffic was taking it slow, too! We’ve got good tires and a good truck, but there’s no weight in the back, so it doesn’t take much before I can feel it wanting to fishtail.

I left quite early and still had time when I got to my mother’s town. I decided to fill the gas tank and pick up some fried chicken for my mother and myself for lunch. I remembered that today is Monday, so she would have her Meals on Wheels delivery, so I asked to have the food split between two boxes, so she could have hers later in the day.

As I was paying for everything, one of the regular staff who was having her own lunch break started chatting, asking if I was having lunch with my mother today. I told her, sort of, and mentioned she would be having her Meals on Wheels, so I got hers separate for later. That’s when a customer sitting at another table (this gas station has several tables for people to sit down and have their coffee or chicken dinners) said that she would not be getting her Meals on Wheels today – all deliveries were cancelled today! With the road conditions, I’m not surprised.

So I was extra glad I’d decided to pick up food while getting gas!

I still got to my mother’s early, which was still good. I was able to get some stuff done for her before we settled down to eat. She still has her cold, and was feeling rather sorry for herself. She has developed a terrible habit, though, of making herself gasp and pant. She says it makes her stomach feel better. ??? It’s rather alarming to hear, and then she just stops and starts breathing normally.

As I was boiling water for tea, I asked her which tea she wanted and she suggested the immunity boosting teas my sister got for her, that she’s been drinking since she has a cold.

There were two different kinds, and they were both citrus based.

*sigh*

So my mother is supposed to avoid citrus, etc., but my sister keeps getting her this stuff!

At least the Cup-o-soup went over well, but I’m pretty sure those have onion in them, which is also on the avoid list.

While puttering in her kitchen, I remembered to look at her cupboard doors and saw that the printout of foods that she needed to avoid, and which were still good, for her acid reflux, was gone. There was just a bit of torn tape left where it was.

*sigh*

After we ate, we talked about her upcoming appointment and what to tell the doctor. She brought up again, how she figured she should just stop taking the pills, because they aren’t doing anything. She says there has been no change. I went through again that he’d explained: he was going to start her on a low dose first, and if that didn’t help in 3 months, he would increase the dose for another three months. Or, he might try prescribing a different medication, but that is less likely.

I asked her if she were following the other instructions he’s given her, and if she still had the information printout with all that on it.

No, she wasn’t doing the other stuff, and she didn’t know where the printouts were anymore.

*sigh*

She started complaining again about how she’s taking soooo many pills, and she’s tired of taking soooo many pills.

She’s not taking that many pills and, right now, one of them is basically a special multi-vitamin for her eye with dry macular degeneration, to keep it from getting worse.

I reminded her of just how fortunate she really is. I told her how many pills my husband takes, plus two injections, and even he isn’t taking all that much compared to some people. The thing is, the pills are doing their job, so she’s not feeling the things they are there for, so she thinks they are not needed. She’s not understanding that if she stops taking them, all these things they are protecting her from would start making her sick. I can’t imagine how terrible she would be feeling, for example, if she were NOT on the acid reflux pill, when just having a bit of citrus makes her think she’s dying (until she takes some Pepto).

Her phone appointment was at 2pm. When it was 10 after, she started saying, maybe they forgot about her. Another five minutes, and she was saying, maybe we should call them. I told her, if we were at the appointment in person, we’d just be sitting in a waiting room right now.

Still, I did find the number and tried calling the clinic. The automated system eventually got me to a message saying they were so busy, they weren’t taking any more messages, but to leave a message (???) and they would get back to the caller in 48-72 hours.

!!!!!

So I hung up, since there really wasn’t much point in leaving a message, when it was still possible they’d be calling.

My mother, however, was getting really tired by then and falling asleep in her chair. I finally told her, go ahead and lie down. I would stay close to the phone. Just give me time to go to the bathroom first, she could like down and leave the phone to me.

I had just gone into the bathroom and was closing the door when I heard a quiet knock.

Who would be knocking on my mother’s door at this time?

So I started opening the door again to answer the door for her, but it was already being opened.

There was our vandal, saying something about how my mother must be on the phone, walking right into her apartment! The bathroom door opens out and partially blocks the entryway, so when I was basically right in front of him when our vandal saw me and stopped dead in his tracks.

He quickly said he had to go. There was a container in his hand he quickly dropped on her dining table, and practically ran out the door.

Behind him, I could see a neighbour he’d brought along. I was very happy to see our neighbour. This is someone else I grew up with and consider family. He’s a very good man, and has been a sort of go-between for us, trying to get our vandal to see some sort of sense.

When he saw me, from the hallway, he looked like he was fighting back laughter.

Our vandal had left so fast, he’d left the door to close on its own behind him. I was able to grab the door and say high to our neighbour as he was leaving, but our vandal had gone down the hall so fast, I couldn’t see him anymore.

When I turned back, there was my mother, laughing.

I am so glad I was there! While my neighbour would have made sure our vandal treated my mother well, having him show up, on top of my mother being sick with a cold, would not have been pleasant for her at all.

I wasn’t really surprised to see him. I’d already called my mother to warn her he might suddenly show up, since I’ve been seeing him stalking our driveway again. I just expected him to show up earlier than today!

As for the container he left, it looked like it had pea soup in it, or something like that. My mother told me, she didn’t want it. She already had two other containers in her freezer from his, she doesn’t want. She said, with the way he talks and the things he says, it makes the food taste bad.

I totally get it.

I ended up popping it into the freezer, though, to be dealt with later.

After that little adventure, my mother was able to lie down and I settled into her armchair, in her view, with the phone.

Well, wouldn’t you know, as soon as she lay down, suddenly my mother was wide awake.

Our vandal showing up might have had a bit to do with that.

After a while, she gave up and got up.

By then, it was almost 3, and the doctor still hadn’t phoned. I didn’t want to stay much longer, as it would be getting dark soon. So I called the clinic number back and this time, left a message.

The drive back was both better and worse. Better, because the roads had been cleared by then. Worse, because I was not driving right into the wind and getting buffeted a lot more. Again, most vehicles were also taking it slow, which was much appreciated.

I got home in time for the evening feeding for the outside cats. I quickly did that, topped up their water, and played with Kohl in the isolation shelter for a bit.

Patience was not very patient just then! He was a hungry boy. 😊

Then I grabbed something to clear windows with and went to my brother’s truck to clear the windows of snow, so his solar trickle charger could get some light. I’ve since learned that another truck that’s parked here also has a trickle charger, so I’ll have to remember to clear that vehicle’s windshield, too, the next time I’m out there.

All in all, I’d say it was a good day, even though the telephone doctor’s appointment never happened. It meant I was there when our vandal showed up, and that made it worthwhile it all on its own!

The Re-Farmer

A quiet day after evening drama

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First, the fun stuff!

I did the morning routine today. We were under weather warnings yesterday for snow, but from what I could see, we didn’t get much of any, overnight. Or, if we did, it melted right away, then froze by morning, because it was SO slippery! It’s snowing now, though, so we’ll see how that works out.

Of course, the isolation babies got their extra treat of wet cat food. The cat beds we washed last night were returned, so they now have two in their shelter again. Unfortunately, they seem to be ignoring the freshly cleaned litter box and just using the floor on the bottom level. At least some of it will be easy to clean up once they are frozen. 🫤

Kohl really wanted attention! I spent quite a bit of time petting her through the sliding windows. She made no effort to get out! The closest was when she rubbed her face against my arm so far, she almost fell through the doorway.

Her partner in crime deigned to sniff my fingers a bit, but Kohl was so aggressive for pets, she got in his way. When I saw him at the food bowl, I thought I might pet him while he was eating, but as soon as Kohl saw me at that sliding door, she came right over. She was pushing her way through to get pets so aggressively, she pushed him away from the food! So I stopped, to give him a chance to eat. He, also, made no effort to leave the isolation shelter. Other cats, however, saw the open sliding doors and wanted in!

Later on, I got to enjoy another bit of adorableness. Our elderly grandma managed to get access to the new cat bed again. With the other cats, we’ve found as many as three of them squeezed into there, all at once!

There’s barely room for Grandma in there, never mind three cats!

After yesterday evening, I’m happy to say that today really has turned out to be a day of Peace, for the Second Sunday of Advent.

I got a call from my mother “late” last night. It actually was pretty early, but had been dark for so long already, I thought it was closer to midnight, not early evening!

She had clearly called for a reason, so I asked what was going on.

Very long story short…

She was dying and needed to go to the hospital.

Of course she did. It was a Saturday night. *sigh* It’s always on a Saturday, or Sunday on a long weekend.

I really don’t want to be so jaded by this, but she does it so often!

I told her, we’re under a weather watch. If she really felt she needed to go to the hospital, it would be safest to call an ambulance.

Then I had to keep asking questions to get some idea of why she felt she needed to go to the hospital.

Her cold was getting worse. She was coughing lots. There was pain in her stomach. She had a headache, which she thought was connected to her stomach.

Even the pain in her stomach took quite a while to get straight. About all I could get out of her is that she felt pain directly below her sternum. Every time I tried to get a clearer description, she’s start to tell me, then launch into something else, like did I know where her important stuff in her apartment was hidden (in case she dies or is in the hospital, and people go into her apartment to snoop).

She didn’t want an ambulance, because she wanted someone with her to watch her purse for her; she has important stuff in her purse, and she didn’t want people going through it while she was getting tests done.

She didn’t want to go to the same ER as last time, because that hospital is run by Muslims now. The last time she was there, when I went to pick her up, she told me she had a Muslim doctor (a hijabi woman), and that she had “stolen my heart”. She’d had a very positive experience with her, but has since rewritten her memory again. Now, because there was one Muslim doctor, she has decided that means the entire hospital is run by Muslims. *sigh*

Then she didn’t want to go to that ER because last time, she was in the waiting room for 15 hours (she did get called for tests in that time frame, but I had to explain triage to her again).

I ended up going online to see which hospital ERs in our region were open. The one nearest us was still open, but closing at 9pm. The other, in the hospital her doctor’s clinic is in, was open for the night. Did she really want to go to the ER? We talked about how, every time she’s gone, they would do tests, find nothing wrong, and send her home.

Oh, they found something, but they won’t tell her, because they want her to die. They take advantage of old people. They don’t care. Etc.

It was while I was looking up to see where there were any open ERs in our area, and talking about how busy they get on the weekends, that my mother even commented on how this always seems to happen on a Saturday! I wonder why? she asks. 😄

Then, because I wasn’t leaping to drive her to the ER immediately, she launched into how her children didn’t care about her, either. When that didn’t work, she shifted to, “oh, you are already dealing with so much. I’m sorry I called you. I shouldn’t have called you.” (a regular passive aggressive dig about my disabled husband)

*sigh*

After straightening that out, too, she started talking about how she needs to be in a nursing home, she can’t take care of herself anymore, she needs help.

I told her (again), you can’t just walk into a nursing home and get accepted. We are working on it. There is a process that has already been started, but it can take a while. Nursing homes are for people who are a lot further along than she is, and we would basically be waiting for someone to die for a bed to open. She forgets how my dad was before he went into the nursing home. By then, he was getting home care visits for personal care three times a day, and had declined to the point that they could not longer meet his needs. Very different from my mother getting three med assists a day, to make sure she takes her pills properly.

I was finally able to calm her down and told her that I would talk to my siblings and let them know what’s going on, suggesting she have herself some hot tea and rest. Which she agreed to do.

Once off the phone, I created a group chat to message my siblings, thinking it would be faster than email. My sister turns her phone off when she’s at home, though, and didn’t respond until well past 1am. I was finally able to reach my brother in a side chat, and he only had time to ask if Mom had been eating those mandarins my sister had picked up for her. I completely forgot about those. My mother isn’t supposed to eat anything citrus, as it triggers her acid reflux, but my sister got them for her because she felt they were mild enough *sigh* and because my mother had a cold and needed the vitamin C.

For someone who was really sick with a cold, my mother had sounded really great on the phone. Just some mild coughing, towards the end of the conversation.

So I finally went to bed and didn’t see my sister’s response until past 6am.

After doing my morning rounds and having breakfast, I figured it was a good time to try calling my mother. Her morning med assist should have come and gone by then.

I’m happy to say that my mother reported feeling much better. The “pink medicine” (the Pepto) helped so much. Her stomach was hurting much less and her cold was getting better.

Her voice was sounding hoarser this morning, though, and she was coughing more throughout our conversation, but overall, she said she was improving.

I remembered to ask her if she’d been eating the mandarins. She bounced around the answer, saying things like, not this morning, or, let me check, and, only during the day (since she insists on eating foods that will trigger her acid reflux, I’ve suggested that she at least tries to eat only a small amount, early in the day, since it’s when she lies down to sleep that it really bothers her) and so on. So I concluded that she probably did have several of them before all this started, but wasn’t about to admit it.

We talked a bit about the list of foods I gave her that could cause her problems, and which were okay. I think the printout I gave her might still be taped up on one of her cupboard doors. I brought up tomatoes, because I knew my sister had been giving her tomatoes from her garden, first fresh, then canned, over the past while. She said, no, she’d already finished those off. My mother even had given me one of my sister’s jars of tomatoes a while back, because it was just tomatoes; my sister didn’t even put salt in it. 😄 I forgot to bring up onions, though. I think she does still have some of those. So anything citrus, anything in the onion family, and tomatoes are the things she most commonly eats that are causing her problems. She is on acid reflux medication, and I’d hate to see how bad it would be for her if she wasn’t! The Pepto helps her for these short term problems, though.

At one point, when I was asking her questions about how she was feeling and what she had been doing, she brought up dry mouth again – this time, blaming the mandarins. We talked about her need to hydrate, but she just doesn’t want to drink water! As she put it, her mouth wants water, but her stomach doesn’t.

I do get that, so we talked about other ways to hydrate, including through some kinds of foods.

With her voice being so rough and her coughing, I didn’t want to keep her talking on the phone for too long. I tried to say good bye a few times, but she kept finding other things to talk about, like how she had “forced herself” to change her bedding, and mopping her bedroom floor with disinfectant while her bed was moved away from the wall, and how she was so sick, she never even got out of her nightgown, all day…

Honestly, my mother has no idea how strong she is, and how well she’s doing. She’s practically indestructible, but constantly complaining about how sick she is and increasingly talking about how she is dying.

Today, though, she was able to recognized that yesterday was a combination of things that made her feel so much worse, and now she’s glad she didn’t go to the hospital.

I really do hope they are able to get her into some sort of assisted living soon. It’s so hard to know what’s going on with her, how much is real, how much is her deciding things are worse than they are, and so on. She really does need someone around that can monitor her. Between me and my siblings, none of us are in a position to be that for her.

After I was done talking to her on the phone, I updated my siblings. My sister later reported on her own phone tall to my mother. It seems she’d picked up some cup-o-soup for my mother when she did her grocery shopping for her – something my mother would never had bought for herself – and that Mom was going to have some for lunch.

So all is improving with my mother.

Meanwhile, it has been slowly snowing throughout most of the day. We have another ongoing weather warning for “snow showers” right now, because we’re at only -3C/27F, though the wind chill puts us at -12C/10F. It’s supposed to keep snowing, heavily, at times, until about 3am. It’s also supposed to slowly keep getting colder overnight until we reach about -11C/12F by about 7am, and stay that temperature all day.

Hopefully, the roads will be cleared and no longer slippery, by the time I have to go to my mother’s, tomorrow, for her telephone doctor’s appointment.

For now, though, it does look all peaceful outside, and I’m much relieved that my mother is doing better today.

The Re-Farmer

First snow – sort of – and things went well

/ Re-Farmer / 3 Comments

It seems so odd, having my daughter doing the morning rounds so I can sleep in. 😄

I still wake up at first light, just out of habit, but I at least got another hour or so of sleep in after that. I do miss seeing all the kitties first thing in the morning, though!

Today was my mother’s appointment in the city for eye treatment, and I needed to be on the road by 10:30am. Knowing that we’d be on the road at lunch time, and that it would be hours before we could eat, I made sure to have a late breakfast before heading out.

I was a bit surprised to see actual snow on the ground. I suppose this is technically our first snow.

It was still there, sort of, when I got home. We had so much rain, I wasn’t expecting to see any.

Unfortunately, that rain did cause another problem – it froze the lock on the gate! I lost a few minutes, warming it up so I could unlock it and open the gate. Thankfully, when I work out times to get places, I try to factor in extra time, just for stuff like this!

Also for stuff like stopping for gas. Usually, I would do that before picking up my mother, but I told her when to expect me and the delay had me running later than that, so I went to her place first. We left pretty much right away so I could stop for gas, then continued on.

The drive in went really well. The roads were clear (unlike other parts of the province, where highways were still closed due to icy conditions), traffic went smoothly, there was no construction or accidents or any delays. We actually got to the clinic an hour early!

Which worked out. By the time my mother was checked in and we went to the waiting room, it wasn’t long at all before she was called in for the first part of her appointment, at least 40 minutes early!

The first thing was to check her eye with the eye chart – she couldn’t see even a single letter with her right eye, just dark – then dilate the eye so they could get pictures. After a few minutes to dilate, she was taken to another room for the scan.

Thankfully, they didn’t have to try and get video this time, because it was hard enough just to get a clear still shot. The poor guy kept trying to find a way to get her to focus in one spot and stop moving her eye, but she kept trying to look for something to focus on. How do you focus on something you can’t see? Her eye was darting all over the place. Then she started cranking her head to one side, trying to find something she could see, which put her eye outside the machine’s frame. We both tried to find a way to tell her to just try and look straight ahead to where the thought the green X she couldn’t see was supposed to be, and not move.

He did eventually get the shots he needed, though, and then it was off to a different waiting room. After a while, the doctor swung by and told my mother she could go into the next room, but in the time it took use to get her up and moving with her walker, he was gone. We didn’t know which room she was supposed to go into. So she sat on her walker while we looked around to see if he’d come by again which, unfortunately, put my mother in the way in an intersection of hallways.

We were next to a room with an open door that had the computer monitors up and running, though, and the eye images looked familiar. So I went in and looked around on the screens for a name. Sure enough, it was my mother’s file, so that was the room she was supposed to go into.

I told her this, but she wouldn’t move, because the doctor wasn’t there to tell her to go into there.

We waited a few more minutes until a door in the next room opened. The doctor was there with another patient. He was surprised to see us, so I quickly told him, we didn’t see which room he’d indicated and, while I saw her name on the screen in the one room, my mother was refusing to go in. So he came out and assured her that it was the right space before returning to his patient. He was very apologetic when he came back later. He said he had indicated which room and I told him, we simply missed it. I did actually see his arm wave, but couldn’t tell where he was waving us to.

At this point, he went over the images from the past two visits, plus the new ones, for comparison. He asked how my mother felt and she said, she saw no change. Which is actually a good thing, since it means things are not getting worse. The scans show improvement, but she’s not seeing a change because of the scar tissue. There is nothing that can be done about that.

He gave her the option of not getting the treatment at all today. There is still some blood in her eye, but very little. All they can do is keep it from getting worse. At this stage, if she skipped the treatment, he couldn’t say, one way or the other, if the bleeding would come back or not. She would have to come back for monitoring, but not for a couple of months. At the same time, he didn’t want to put her through the treatment, she didn’t want it.

My mother’s response was, we’re here, so we may as well do it!

Once that was decided, he then took care of the freezing and antibiotic drops, then the freezing injection, which needs 7 minutes before the final injections. While we were waiting, we kept talking, and the doctor was trying to explain again that all he could do right now was try to keep things from getting worse.

Then my mother asked if getting new glasses would help.

*sigh*

There’s two problems with her question. One is, she isn’t understanding that the problem is scar tissue. No prescription lens is going to make a difference for her right eye. Her left eye, maybe, but that’s it. I told her, if she wanted to, she could wear her new glasses, which would make a difference for her left eye, but no glasses will help with her right eye, which the doctor confirmed.

Which leads to the other problem with her question. She’s been refusing to wear her new glasses because they didn’t make her headaches go away. Her macular degeneration had not started when she had her eyes tested and got her new glasses, but it must have started very soon after. My mother simply decided that the problems with her vision were being caused by the new glasses, which she decided was because the eye doctor gave her the wrong prescription – and she’d already re-written her memory about how they treated her when I brought her to pick up the new glasses. She had also been angry about how much the glasses cost, thinking they should still cost as much as glasses did decades ago. Add in that the eye doctor was female, which my mother views as even worse that her being Asian, and my mother was quite ready to blame the eye doctor, even though it’s entirely possible my mother had messed up her own prescription. I was in the room while she was being tested, and I could see that it’s possible she started giving answers because she was tired and not able to actually tell one setting from another, or not giving herself the time to see. The doctor that referred her to this clinic, however, was a male, so in her mind, he would get it right, because males are better at such things than females. 🫤 The specialist treating her is Asian, but he’s male, so that sort of makes up for it, in her mind. 🫤

After the seven minutes where up, the doctor moved on to the next steps. Unfortunately, the doctor was having the same problem the tech was. My mother couldn’t stop moving her eye. Or moving in general. When asked to open her eyes wide, she would raise her eyebrows, but that did nothing to open her eyes any wider. At one point, she moved her eye during an injection, resulting in a scratch. That got the disinfectant drops right away. Then with another injection, he had it all ready and was about to do it when he stopped and left the room. He’d spotted that my mother had managed to breathe, possibly spit on, the freshly exposed needle just before he moved it to her eye. He wasn’t going to take any chances, and got a new needle.

This was the first time the treatment hurt for my mother, and that would be because of the movement during an injection. Every time she blinked her eye after that, she felt pain, even with the freezing.

Besides that, everything went smoothly and quickly. The doctor said for her to come back in 2 or 3 months, but there would be no injection. They would just need to check her eye.

After asking my mother about it, we went with an appointment in three months. Of course, if there is any pain that might suggest a possible infection, she is to come back right away, or if the clinic is closed, to go to a specific ER in the city that can deal with eye issues.

Overall, the whole thing went well and smoothly. My mother didn’t try to get out of the appointment. She seemed to be in good spirits and feeling stronger than I’ve seen her in a while. No sudden changes in behaviour or strange rants. Even while driving, there was only one time when she suddenly screamed because she didn’t like how close she thought I was getting to another vehicle, as I was maneuvering into the disabled parking spot. I had plenty of space, but her exclamation was enough to potentially cause an accident, all on its own. Thankfully, it was in a parking lot, not in the middle of traffic. I had to remind her of my number one rule in the vehicle: no distracting the driver!

Not only did she seem in good spirits and was having one of her good days in behaviour, she actually expressed gratitude and complimented me, without any passive aggressive criticisms at the same time. Which is actually quite out of character for her, most of the time.

I’ll take the good when it happens, and be thankful for it!

After the appointment, it was straight back to her town with only a stop at the gas station to pick up fried chicken and wedges for a very, very late lunch. Plus milk, the only thing she was out of at home! With Meals on Wheels coming by three times a week, her groceries are lasting a lot longer.

While we were having our very late lunch, it was still too early for her to take her supper time medications. She’d gotten a call this morning from the home care scheduler, saying they didn’t have anyone who could come by this morning. They are supposed to come in between 7 and 9 am – and my mom got the call at 9! She’d already gotten up and had them with her breakfast, at 6am. When she had her medication assist before bed last night, she mentioned that she was going into the city today and wasn’t sure if she’d be back in time for the supper medication assist, which the scheduler did have in her notes. In the end, my mother told them not to come in for both remaining visits today. She knew she would be tired, and the timing of their visits have sometimes been disruptive for her. After telling me this, I made sure to get her supper medications ready in the miniature tagine pinch pot I brought for her for her medications. She can see how many pills are in there, and it has an adorable little cover.

As we were talking, however, she noticed something on her table and picked it up – and it turned out to be a half pill from her morning medications! She hadn’t used the little pinch pot first, after taking them out of the blister pack, and put them straight into her mouth. She had dropped one without noticing!

Oops.

At least she did find it again.

I didn’t stay too much longer after that, as I was feeling pretty tired, too. I also left early enough to stop at the post office on the way home. Canada Post is on strike right now, but that doesn’t stop the junk mail from being delivered. 🫤🫤 There did turn out to be a Purolator package waiting for us, though.

When I got home, I had a whole crowd of yard cats waiting for me! It was time for their evening feeding, so I took care of that, while one of my daughters took care of the inside cat feeding.

I tried to do a head count, and I might have counted 36, but they were moving around so much, I may have counted some, twice.

I also found a collar on the sun room floor. Nosy keeps managing to get his off. This time, I spotted a cat I thought might be Collin. After checking his ear for a tattoo, I put the collar on him, instead. He’s the one fixed cat that is the hardest to tell apart from the other white and greys! Nosy and Stinky at least have distinctive markings.

The Cat Lady had ordered some kibble for us from Amazon, but it got delivered to her place instead, for some reason. We missed being able to meet up during my trip to pick up kibble after my daughter’s doctor visit yesterday, so I messaged her about possibly meeting tomorrow. She’ll see what her schedule is like and message me back in the morning.

All in all, everything went really well today. We’ll just need to monitor my mother in regards to how her eye is feeling.

I like it when things are nice and smooth and boring. I’m at a stage in my life where the less excitement there is, the better! 😄😄

I’m also really appreciating our lack of snow right now. I’ve got a lot of driving around to do in the last week of November and the first week of December, between medical appointments and stock up shopping trips. I don’t mind the colder temperatures we’re going to be getting. I just want the roads to stay clear! Looking at the long range forecasts, into December, it’s almost looking as if we’ll be getting a green Christmas! When we lived in the city, we had quite a few of those, even though we lived further north than we do now. Granted, we also would get snow in June or July, so it’s a trade off I’m okay with! 😄 Still, this old body could do without snow for the rest of my life, if I could manage it! 😄

Ah, well. It is what it is! I’m just going to be thankful for what we have now. 😊😊

The Re-Farmer

Everything is all right

/ Re-Farmer / 2 Comments

Well, I’m happy to say that my daughter’s visit to the doctor today went well, and it’s nothing serious. The dizziness was caused by her inner ear.

She also had high blood pressure, though once I heard her numbers, I think it is likely to be “white coat syndrome”. She got a prescription, but we won’t be able to fill it for a while. Once we got home, my husband called the pharmacy to ask how much it was, as our daughters are not covered by his insurance. They couldn’t say, exactly, because it’s currently unavailable, and they don’t know when it will be available again. Still, the approximate cost they were able to give us is well within our prescription budget.

Since we were a walk in, my daughter was seen in between appointments, so we ended up waiting about 2 1/2 hours, give or take a few minutes. We did get to see a new doctor we’d heard excellent reviews for, who also happens to be open for new patients. I’d had it suggested that we switch my mother to this new doctor, since she doesn’t like her current one, because she’s black, female and has a strong accent. I’ve advised against switching doctors because she’s in the middle of trying to get into long term care or assisted living, and changing doctors would set things back.

It turns out, my mother wouldn’t like this doctor, anyhow. She’s black, female and has a strong accent. It just happens to be a British accent instead of a Nigerian one. 😄😄

My daughter, however, really likes her. She listened to what my daughter had to say, didn’t jump to conclusions or make assumptions, and actually took her seriously. After examining her to try and find a cause of the dizziness, which involved sitting my daughter on the edge of the examination table, then flinging her down onto her side abruptly, it was determined that it’s an inner ear problem. My daughter was written up for blood work, and there’s a lab just down the hall from the clinic, so that got done as soon as we booked a follow up appointment in two weeks. This will be to both get the test results and for an official “meet and greet”, so that this doctor will officially be my daughter’s doctor.

In two weeks, I’ve got an appointment for another field of vision test. The eye clinic is just a few blocks away from the medical clinic, and my appointment is in the afternoon. My daughter has to come along to drive me home, since my eyes will be dilated – hopefully, her dizziness will not be an issue by then! So we booked for the same morning.

Unfortunately, the only morning appointment they had was at 8:45. Which means we need to be on the road by at least 7:30, if not earlier. It’ll be a long day, but I don’t mind. My daughter and I can hang out together and have a lunch date in between appointments.

The town we had to go to is most of the way to the small city with the Walmart we go to, in between the big city shopping trips. My daughter felt well enough to go there, instead of figuring out where to find cheap kibble in the town we were in. As we were driving, she read from the printouts she got, which was much funnier than they probably intended.

The short version:

What is the cause? It could be this, it could be that, or it could be nothing at all. We don’t know.

What is the treatment? do this exercise that involves sitting on the side of the bed, then flinging yourself bodily down onto your side abruptly, several times. Repeat the process three times a day.

Why does this treatment work? we have no idea. It just does.

We found that incredibly funny. Especially the “exercise” instructions.

When we got to the Walmart, my daughter stayed in the truck while I did the shopping, as she got more dizzy spells along the way. We didn’t need much, so it wasn’t long before we were on our way home again.

During the drive home, though, we got a message from my husband. He found broken glass on the floor in my office/bedroom, where there is food for the cats. It turned out that the cats had knocked over a glass jar I had on my window sill, filled with pretty beach rocks. Thankfully, the glass broke but didn’t shatter into a million pieces, like some types of glass does. Still, the cat food in the tray had to be thrown out, and I’m probably going to be finding beach rocks on my floor for days!

Meanwhile, tomorrow, I am off again to take my mother for her eye treatment. I called and left a message for her, and she just called back. She didn’t try to get out of it at all, which was good.

What was not good was finding out she had visitors. Our vandal and his wife. Apparently, he’s still getting chemo or something. He behaves when his wife is with him, but after hearing the message he left at my brother’s cell number, she seems to finally understand that when there are other people around, it’s the “nice” him, but those phone calls are the real him.

She still can’t bring herself to tell him to not come around anymore. She told me she tried to recommend he was a religious program she enjoys every morning, and talk to him about turning to God. Apparently, he has some pretty nasty things to say about the show she watches, even with his wife there, so she was not happy.

I do hope the process for getting my mother into long term care or assisted living happens soon. The faster she can move out of where she is, the sooner we can make sure he can’t show up at her place anymore. Hopefully, we can even keep him from finding out where she ended up living but, if nothing else, we’d be able to tell the staff that he’s not allowed to see her for security reasons.

I so wish we didn’t have to do this. We used to be so close. The person he used to be, however, is gone.

Mental illness can be very cruel. Especially if it’s a type where a person can hide it and be “normal”, even from their own spouses.

It is what it is, though. We can only work with the hand we’re dealt with.

As for tomorrow, my mother and I have worked out our schedule, and what time we have to be on the road for. The high for tomorrow is supposed to be below freezing, but no rain or snow, so the roads should be clear.

It’s going to be a long day away from home, though.

I’ll have to remind my family to keep checking my office/bedroom to make sure the cats aren’t destroying it while I’m gone!

🫤🫤

The Re-Farmer

Well, now! That’s short notice.

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First up, I’m happy to say that I did NOT end up having a bad pain day today. With how I was feeling last night, I was rather concerned, but it seems to have worked itself out. Plus, my daughter is doing the morning rounds, and that allowed me to sleep in.

As for my potential plans to work outside, that didn’t happen. It was too wet out for the sort of work I wanted to do. It wasn’t even really raining, either. More fog and mist all morning.

So I was just about to start cleaning out litter boxes when I got a phone call from my mother.

She started out asking how things were going, so I told her about some of things I did yesterday, and things I planned to do tomorrow, which is supposed to be warmer and mostly sunny – though the predicted high keeps changing! At one point, my weather app was telling me we could get as warm as 10C/50F, but I just checked it, and it’s now saying the high will be only 7C/45F Which is still nice. More importantly, it’s supposed to be dry, so I should be able to get certain jobs involving power tools done!

Then I asked how she was doing.

Well… she’s out of milk, of course.

*sigh*

I keep asking her to please have me do her grocery shopping before she runs out of everything, but she refuses. If there’s food in the house, she says, she has to eat it. Temptation.

She wanted me to come tomorrow, of course.

It was barely mid afternoon when she called me (though it was already starting to get dark!), so I suggested I head over right away, instead. That threw her for a bit, as she thought it was much later. She wanted to go to the bank, and wasn’t sure it if would be open still.

It would be, of course.

So I updated the family, quickly changed and was soon out the door. When I got to her place, my mother was ready and waiting, with her winter parka on! We quickly went over her list, then headed out, first to her bank.

Going in and out of the vehicle for that was the limit for her, though, so she stayed in the truck while I did the grocery shopping next.

By the time everything was done and her groceries put away, she wanted me to stay for a visit, but it was getting near sunset. I didn’t want to be driving home in the dark. Too many deer!

When I got to the truck, I checked my phone before I headed out. I’m glad I did! There was a message from my husband, with a phone number. The septic company had called and needed me to call back for a confirmation that they could come over.

Tomorrow morning!

I called them immediately.

The first thing they needed to confirm was where we are. He tried finding our physical address on an online map, found a road with the municipal number, but it ends well to the south of us. I had to explain that the part that goes past our place isn’t listed on the maps, and gave him country directions. Then we confirmed things like making sure the gate would be open. They should be here around 8:30-9am. I also told him about the other gate, with the chain and electric fence across it, that they’ll need to go through, but that just needed to be unhooked. The renter’s cows aren’t here now, so the electric fence isn’t powered.

That done, it was time to go home. I did take advantage of being her town, though, and stopped at the feed store for a 40 pound bag of cat food before heading home.

Now I’m doubly glad I convinced my mother to let me do her grocery shopping today!

What I’m hoping is that we won’t need to hook up the diverter for the septic tank. I really don’t want to punch a hole through the insulated opening and run the septic into the maple grove. So tonight, we’ll be doing as much of the water stuff as we can. Showers before 7:30am. Dishes washed. Cooking that included draining off water. The only thing we don’t have to worry about it the laundry, since we’re still running the drainage hose out the front door, anyhow.

As for how long things will take, it’s hard to say. If everything goes smoothly, it could take as little as 4 hours. If things don’t go smoothly, it could take 8 hours.

The fact that the expeller started working again, though not to its full capacity, may be a good thing. It means the area that was so saturated before isn’t a quagmire anymore.

Well, we’ll see how it goes.

It’s going to be an interesting day, tomorrow!

The Re-Farmer