life

Self sabotage

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*sigh*

My mother did it again.

Last night, I had a voice message on my cell phone, letting my know that there was no one to do my mother’s evening med assist.

Early this morning, I got a call from the home care coordinator, and found out what happened.

My mother’s supper and evening med assists are usually done by the same person. When the home care aid came in for the suppertime visit, apparently my mother started making racist comments about “brown people” being “cockroaches”.

(in retrospect, I am second guessing this; that is not a word my mother would use. I don’t think she knows what a cockroach even is.)

The home care aid said that she found this insulting, because she is Metis, and my mother apparently responded by saying she was a cockroach.

The aid now refuses to go back to my mother, and did the paperwork for that. It went up the chain, and that’s why I got the call.

We talked about it for a while, and there is recognition that my mother’s cognitive decline is playing a part on this. The problem is that this can affect her long term care panel. My mother actually wants to be in a nursing home. A very specific one, and we’re trying to accomplish this for her. The staff at long term care and supporting living, however, are of all races, so this could be a problem.

My mother is basically self sabotaging herself.

When I was done with the call, I sent out a group message to my siblings about it. Not long after, messaged to let us know he’d phoned her from work. My mother did admit she shouldn’t have said what she said to the home care worker, and even said she was sorry. My brother told her that he wasn’t the one she should apologize to – she needs to apologize to the home care worker, but she won’t be coming back, because of how my mother treated her.

My mother was dismissive about it, saying there are lots of workers, and there’s always people looking for jobs. He told her, no, there is a shortage of workers, and you just don’t treat people like that.

She did seem to catch on that she had actually done something wrong.

The morning med assist arrived while they were talking, so they got off the phone. I later found out that my mother had told the morning person to extend her apologies.

I had my appointment in town, though, so I was going to call my mother later.

I got to my appointment early, so I popped into the Red Apple (a rural department store) for a bit. A display caught my eye and distracted me from what I planned to look at, and before long, I was walking out with a caftan and what I at first thought was a sleeveless summer dress, except it was pants, not a skirt. Something that is stepped into from the top, with no zippers or buttons. They were both “one size fits all”, but I didn’t have time to try on either of them. I figured if they didn’t fit me, they might fit my daughters. What I was really after was the caftan, though, for the upcoming summer heat.

Yes, this is relevant.

After my appointment, I remembered to pop over to the autobody shop to ask some questions. Since they were going to be working on the truck at some point, I asked about the door handle and the driver’s seatbelt. The handle broke off and I have to open the window to open it from the outside. I’d called our garage and got an estimate for it, but they don’t normally do that sort of work. The driver’s seatbelt buckle has a terrible habit of suddenly coming undone. Once it catches, it catches, but sometimes it feels like it’s buckled, but isn’t quite all the way, so it’ll suddenly come undone while I’m driving.

It turns out that yes, they could do this work for me, but it would be expensive. The door handle, which is snapped off, is expensive and would cost about the same as the garage would charge me. The garage, however, could go to a scrap yard or something, and find a second hand one. Something they can’t do. As for the seatbelt, that would also be really expensive, because they would have to replace the entire thing, not just the buckle, because that’s how it’s sold. Again, the garage could look for a second hand one for us at a better price.

Then we talked about our insurance claim.

Normally, the insurance will cover like for like and, if that can’t be found, they’ll allow an improvement, but the client pays the difference. The problem is, box covers like the one we had fit newer models, which have different sized truck boxes. The only one she could find that would fit our truck was an off market version, and the insurance company normally wouldn’t approve that. After talking to the adjuster, he said he would have to pass it up the line for approval and get back to her.

He hasn’t gotten back to her yet.

If they don’t approve the off market cover, and there are no other options, they might offer us cash, instead. We would still need a box cover, of course. As for cash, the adjuster put the value of the old box cover at a dollar, because he couldn’t find anything to tell him what it actually cost. So who knows what we would get.

The twisted frame is covered, though, as it needs to be fixed before a box cover can be installed. We’d be charged for part of the painting, because of the rust on the fender, around the wheel well. She told me she would ask the repair guys to try do it so only the top of the frame needs to be painted, not the whole panel. That would save us up to $140.

Then there was the broken tail light cover. The insurance company won’t cover that and, since I can’t prove it wasn’t broken before the box cover was ripped off by the wind, I am not going to contest it. She’s going to see if they can find an off market one for us. The entire tail light assembly gets replaced, not just the cover, and a new market value one can cost $250-$300.

So now I know the status of our insurance claim, and to contact our garage to see if they can find the parts we need from the scrap yard or something. Getting the door handle fixed before winter would be good, that’s for sure!

By the time I got home, it was about mid afternoon. I grabbed a quick lunch, then headed outside. I decided to work on the permanent trellis bed, but needed to clear around it, first. In this area, it made more sense to break out my brother’s push mower first, then go back with the weed trimmer.

Of course, since I had the mower going anyhow, I kept mowing further out. I hadn’t refilled the tank before I started, so I basically just kept going until I ran out of gas, then went to get some more.

Which is when I discovered I had a voice mail message.

From home care.

There was no one to do my mother’s suppertime or evening med assists.

Then, while I was listening to this message, a text message came in.

If was from my mother’s LifeLine provider, telling me it looked like the pendant was no longer connected to the based, and saying to test it. If a test didn’t work, it gave a number to call.

I put away the gas can, and the lawn mower.

Once back inside, I called up my mother. The first thing was to explain about the text I got, and get her to press the button on her LifeLine pendant.

There was no response.

I would have to phone the company.

I then told my mother about the call I got from home care, and that there was no one to come for her two evening med assists. She asked if I knew why, and I told her, I just had a phone message. Her response was, “oh, they’re trying to “get” me”, or something like that. My mother thinks the home care aids are deliberately not coming to give her her meds so that she’ll die. I told her, no, you did this to yourself. Because of how you treated the home care aid, they don’t want to work with you anymore.

Oh, you know about that, she said…

I told her I got a call this morning from the home care coordinator about it. My mother said she’d called her, herself, and wanted her to “visit” (have a meeting). By then, the office was closed, so I told her she wouldn’t hear back until Monday. I then told her I needed to call the LifeLine number, and would be coming over to do her med assist.

After being on hold for awhile, I got through to someone and explained the text message I got, and that I got my mother to test her pendent, with no response. He looked up her file and it seemed her pendent was no longer synced with the base. So he gave me step by step instructions on how to reset it and test it again, and told me that if it didn’t work, call back.

That done, I finally got to finish cleaning up and changing. Our predicted high of 22C/72F turned out to be 27C/81F, so I decided to wear my new caftan, which did fit (the other garment did not, so I have it to my daughters to try one). It is a very loud, mostly deep red, with bold colours in the patterns. More importantly, it’s made of a very light, breezy fabric that feels as close to being naked in the heat, without actually being naked.

So, off I went to my mother’s. When I got there, she was fussing in the kitchen and didn’t stop, so I asked for her LifeLine pendent and did the reset, as instructed, ending with a test. When it was done, what should have happened when I pressed the pendant button at the end was an almost instant human voice responding.

There was nothing.

So I called the number on the machine, using my cell phone (the machine is linked through my mother’s land line). I got the guy on speaker as we talked and he walked me through doing the reset again, then doing the test call.

Nothing.

At which point, they simply replace the machine, and he started that request going. If necessary, they know to call me on our land line first, before trying my cell phone.

That done, I went back to my mother, who was at her dining table, so update her and start getting her meds.

Which is when she noticed what I was wearing.

She commented on it and I told her I had picked it up, just today.

She started laughing at me, because of course she would, and told me it looked like something for sleeping in.

*sigh*

I told her no, not at all. It would be terrible to sleep in (it’s ankle length, I’d be tangled in it in a heartbeat!).

She still said it looked like something to sleep in, but that’s okay, she’s got something similar that she uses to sleep in, too.

…

No, she doesn’t have anything like a caftan. She has night gowns.

She was absolutely oblivious to the idea that laughing at me for what I was wearing was not a nice thing to do. It’s something I have come to expect from her, so it doesn’t really bother me, but she does this to everyone.

That did give me the segue to talk about what happened yesterday.

Long story short, it seems my mother did genuinely seem to realize she had done something wrong. She still tried to justify it. Saying things like, she gave her opinion, the home care worker gave her opinion, like it was some normal conversation. Then she started saying, she’s alone at home all day, and she wants to talk.

I told her, when they come to her place, they are there to do their job and leave. They are not there to talk about politic or religion or race or whatever. She needs to treat people nicely, and I stressed that her behaviour could keep her from getting into the nursing home she wants to be in.

As we talked, she mentioned again that she’d called the case coordinator, while bringing out the home care worker list of names and times they’d be coming. The number on there is what she called and left a message.

She called the shift scheduler.

I told her, this number was for someone else. I’d given her the number for the case coordinator, and it was with the schedule, but it was gone. Meanwhile, my mother was angry that the number she wanted wasn’t on there. I told her, this number would have different people answering, depending on the time of day and day of the week. The number she wanted is office hours only.

Meanwhile, I got her supper time meds out, and she took them a bit early. That freed up her little pill counting bowl and I set out her before bed pills, plus her inhaler, for later. I also updated the notebook I keep inside the lock box for the next home care aid to see.

Once all of that was done and everything was put away, I stayed for a while longer, and we talked some more about her behaviour. This time, my mother took out what she’d showed the home care worker. It was a photocopy from a new article, showing a grown of anti-Western, pro-terrorist demonstrators, in Canada, and she had basically asked the woman her opinion. Apparently, she said she agreed with the pro-terrorist demonstrators, which ticked my mother off. The women then told my mother that her ex-husband was black, and her kids were half black.

…

The case coordinator told me she’d said she was Metis.

So we have another discrepancy on the stories, here!

I asked my mother, why do you even have this? (She would have had to get someone to print out or make a photo copy of the image for her) And why would you show it to the home care aid?

My mother started talking about being lonely and wanting to have someone to talk to. (It sounds like her neighbours in the building are avoiding her now.) I said fine. Talk about the weather. Talk about the gardens (the building’s garden plots are visible out her window). Don’t talk about stuff like this.

I also recommended she stop watching TV news, because it’s not good for her!

My mother agreed that she would not talk about things unrelated to her med assist when the home care workers came.

Once I was sure she was set up for the evening, I headed home. By then, it was time for my own supper. My plans to work in the garden after clearing around the bed I was going to work on were out the window, but it was light enough to at least do the watering, including the new trees and bushes.

While I was watering the high raised bed, I picked a couple of things.

One is a Purple Prince turnip. I thought the yellow one should have been a Zlata radish, but it was so big, I thought maybe I somehow had some Gold Ball turnip seeds in there.

Later on, while watering the low raised bed in the east yard, which as the same mix, plus lettuce seeds, I picked a few more of the yellow ones. They really are radishes, not turnips. It just happens that this one is very large for a radish!

While I was still out there, my older daughter came out to talk about a potential visit from my son from another mother, later in the year. It has been a long time since we’ve seen him! She stayed out to help with the watering, too. The girls had already taken care of feeding the outside cats while I was done, but after I was done watering, I stayed out to play with Poirot’s kittens. They REALLY want attention, and love to get under foot!

Some of the bigger kittens have infected eyes, but I was able to wash only Sir Robin’s eye. I tried to get Havarti (the one orange tabby kitten) to wash one of his eyes, but he would not let me get him. I hope I’ll be able to wash it out, tomorrow.

Kitten therapy is good.

This has turned out to be a pretty messed up day. I really hope my mother takes our warnings to heart, and starts behaving better.

In talking about the situation, my brother had a good point, though. As people age, this sort of thing is not at all unusual. This is usually something that would play a part in getting someone IN to long term care, not out of it. My brother remembers an eye doctor we used to go to, many years ago. He was the sweetest man every, but when dementia hit, he suddenly starting saying some incredibly racist things. It was actually a big part of how he ended up in long term care. I supposed it’s different with my mother, since she has always been racist. Her cognitive decline is just bringing it out more, not creating it. The end result is the same, though, and as bad as my mother can be, others in long term care are far worse.

*sigh* again.

Well, whatever happens, happens. We do the best we can.

What other choice is there?

The Re-Farmer

Morning pretties, and a longer day than expected

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My daughter had a doctor’s appointment today, so I headed out to do my morning rounds early, then stayed out to work in the garden for a couple of hours. I’ll write about that in a separate garden post.

Before we headed out, I couldn’t resist getting a picture of Ginger.

Since Butterscotch has gone into another stressed out and hiding all day phase, I’ve been kicking the other cats out of my room for the night, so she can come out to eat, drink, use the litter box, and not be hiding under an armchair all night. Ginger is the one cat I’ve been allowing in the room at night, since he’s a bundle of nerves, too. He is taking full advantage of the perk, and luxuriating in comfortable cat beds and oodles of pets. Thankfully, he and Butterscotch get along!

This time of year, we’ve got quite a few things blooming, or starting to get into bloom. This year, a couple of bushes that normally don’t, are blooming prolifically for the first time since we’ve moved out here!

The white flowers are on a small bush near the house. It has been bashed and battered, and at one point, I was sure it was dead. Whatever it is, it’s incredibly hardy! This year, not only is it the largest I’ve seen it since our first year here – a major recovery – but it is covered in these clusters of white flowers.

The lilacs are on a bush that is at the fence on one side of the gate at our driveway. This area gets baked in the sun, though it at least gets some shade from a giant spruce tree in the evenings. It also doesn’t get a lot of moisture. This year, however, we have enough moisture that the “pond” not far away in the old hay yard still has some moisture in it. Since moving here, I’ve seen it bloom a couple of times, when we had very wet springs, but nothing like its blooming this year!

There is another lilac planted at the fence line on the other side of the gate. That area gets baked out from sunrise to sunset, and I’m amazes it’s surviving. No flowers this year, though.

When we finally get around to making the people gate near that sad lilac, I’m hoping to improve conditions around it and find a way to get water to it.

As my daughter and I were heading out, she got the truck out of the garage while I opened the gate, so I picked a few clusters of lilacs for her. She set them on the dash. When we came back to the truck after her appointment, they were completely flat and shriveled from the heat! I hope she remembered to take them out when she parked the truck in the garage.

Thankfully, she and I left really early for her appointment. My plan was to have lunch before her appointment. About twenty minutes from home, she suddenly remembered the prescription, an injection, she was supposed to bring with her today. It was still in the fridge at home! So we turned around and headed back while I messaged her sister to meet us at the gate with it in an insulated bag and some ice packs.

Even with the return trip, we got there early enough that we could have had lunch at the Subway next door – until we saw the line up. So we skipped that and headed for the clinic. She got into the examination room a bit early, but the doctor was running late and even had to leave part way through the visit and come back later. It was just a follow up visit, though, and there were no changes to my daughter’s mediations. She did get a chance to show and ask the doctor about some skin issues she’s been having. She’s had issues that she traced to an allergy to something in her deodorant, but with the recent heat, that’s gotten painfully worse, plus she’s got all sorts of skin issues. The doctor said it looks fungal, and recommended…

Head and Shoulders, used as a body wash.

She could have prescribed an anti-fungal cream but it turns out Head and Shoulders contains anti-fungal ingredients that work just as well, and it’s a lot cheaper!

She also recommended doing her laundry in hot water, and hanging her clothes on the line instead of using the drier. My daughter had already switched to using hot water and we’ve started to use the clothes line more often, too. Often enough that we’re looking to hook up two more lines. When I was growing up here, there were three laundry lines set up, so the hooks for pullies are already on the posts. I have no idea what happened to the pullies that used to be there. I spotted some kits that include 150′ (which is how much we would need) of medium strength, plastic coated metal laundry line, and all the parts and pieces, for about $50. The pullies and tightener, however are plastic, so I think we’d be better off paying a bit extra and getting metal pullies and tightener.

Anyhow, sunlight is also anti-fungal, so we’ll be using the clothes line more often. We’ll need to get more clothes pins, though. The kittens have discovered them and think they are toys!

After my daughter’s appointment was done, we finally had lunch. We were both pretty famished by then! We’d both had only very light breakfasts.

We also had a shopping trip planned. I was prepared to have to go to town to pick up new prescriptions, if necessary, but it wasn’t, so that made the day a bit shorter! The nearest Walmart to us is just 15 minutes away from the town our doctor is in, so that worked out well, too.

Since we were planning to get things that needed to stay cold, we popped over to the Dollarama, first. I got the rest of the tomato cages I wanted, which will be used over the eggplant and pepper transplants. I also got more plant clips, as my bucket with them seems to have disappeared!

The Walmart shopping was both stuff for my husband, and my daughters’ list. Nothing came out of my regular grocery budget, so I didn’t do my usual “this is what $X looks like” photo. The important thing is that I remembered to get more distilled water for my husband’s CPAP humidifier.

This year, I’ve been using his empty water bottles to make collars for transplants, much more than usual, since we’re expecting a dry year. I’ve used up all the old collars I’d used last year, plus made more with all the bottles I’ve been saving all winter. There’s only a few empty water bottles left and, if I want one for each of the remaining tomato plants, I’m going to have to find more.

Oh! I just remembered! I have a bunch of them on posts at the chimney block garden bet at the chain link fence! Which means I’ll only be short about 5 or 6 for the tomatoes I have left to do. I’m sure I can find enough other containers I’ve been saving to reuse somehow.

By the time we got home, it was about 5pm. As we pulled into the yard to unload, the yard cats were absolutely everywhere, waiting for their feeding time! As soon as my daughters and I got most of it in, I headed over to feed them and distract them away from the truck, so my daughter could safely leave the yard and park it.

One of Poirot’s babies made an achievement today. Japp got out of the cat cage! I’m not sure if s/he climbed out the “door”, or if s/he found the opening at the bottom (it was blocked with a stuffy). We’re really going to have to watch our step, now!

The days are long enough and warm enough that I seriously considered going back out to at least work on the garden bed I’ll be planting in tomorrow, but I need to keep my limits in mind. I’m already pushing them on a daily basis right now. Plus, we’re getting weather alerts for possible thunderstorms. Looking at the weather radar, I don’t think we’ll be hit with any, but it’s possible I certainly won’t complain about getting more rain!

I’ve got a couple of days with no outings or appointments planned. If all goes well, I should have everything transplanted or direct sown by then. After that, it’s more construction type stuff, like making the wattle weave walls on the bed in the old kitchen garden, and working on the permanent trellis supports.

The main focus right now is just to get plants and seeds in the ground!

Tomorrow.

I’m done for today.

😄

The Re-Farmer

Our 2025 Garden: new asparagus bed, garlic and potatoes

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My goal for the day was to get all the transplants in.

Ha!

No, I didn’t achieve that goal.

I did, however, get a LOT done, until the 34C/93F heat finally did me in. Enough that I’ll be breaking it up into several posts.

The start of the day was the same as it has been for the past while; after my morning rounds, everything got a watering in preparation for the coming heat. I was quite appreciating the new watering can, which holds twice as much as the breaking apart bucket I’ve been using! So that part of the watering went a lot faster.

Before I started watering the new asparagus bed, though, I did some modification. The landscape fabric or whatever it is had just been folded back to uncover the space I planted in, and the rocks I pulled out was just tossed on top. I lifted the folded side to shift all the rocks towards the opposite side, then laid the edge out close to the little wire fence protecting the strawberries. After weighing that down, I pulled the other end to cover a new section of what had been our squash patch in previous years.

There was still some grass clippings on the fabric, and that got used to lightly mulch the asparagus area, and heavily mulch along the wire fence. Once that was done, it all got a thorough watering.

The light mulch should be enough to protect the soil, while still making it easy for the baby asparagus to poke through. The heavy mulch should, hopefully, keep any weeds from coming back by the strawberries.

I’d left a couple of buckets filled with water to keep them from blowing them away. I noticed the cats have been drinking from them, often, so now I keep them full for the kitties. 😊

Next to the new asparagus bed is our garlic bed, then the potatoes.

The garlic is looking so good! We should start getting scapes soon. We are all looking forward to cooking with those!

The potatoes are coming up a lot faster now. When watering that bed, I noticed there are SO many frogs! They get startled when I water the potatoes, and jump into the netting. They seem to be able to get in and out just fine, though – at least when they’re not being scared by something!

Once all the watering was done, it was finally time to start transplanting things.

See you at my next post!

The Re-Farmer

So tired

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I’ve definitely been running around too much, over the past while.

With the trips to the city, I haven’t been doing as much physical labour, but I’m still in a lot of pain. Mostly the OA joint pain, but it’s definitely more of a mental fatigue than a physical one.

I headed out early today to do the morning watering. I didn’t need my older daughter to help out this time, nor was my younger daughter heading out with me, so they got to do some catching up on stuff in the house, instead.

My younger daughter was going to get the lawn mowing done as much as she could, in the heat. So, just riding mower stuff! We will just need to do the areas that can only be reached with either the push mower or the weed trimmer, later on.

I picked up some of my mother’s favourite fried chicken and potato wedges for our lunch today, so we had a relaxed visit over food, first. She was having one of her better days, behaviour wise, which made it much more pleasant! After that, we went over her shopping list. I spotted some gaps and asked a few questions, and did end up adding a couple of things to her list, too.

Before I headed out, I changed her bedding for her, so she could lie down while I was gone. She is really having a much harder time moving around her apartment of late. For all the heat, she’s also been finding herself getting cold!

I hit a couple of stores to get her shopping list done. It wasn’t a large list, but still came out to over $90. That’s just for one person for a week, and she has Meals on Wheels three times a week!

After her groceries were put away, I did some light housekeeping for her, then headed out. I made a brief stop at the hardware store, hoping to find some buckets in smaller sizes than 5 gallons, or watering cans. There weren’t any in the store, but I did remember to get handles to attach to the isolation shelter, to make it easier to move around, and caps for the end of the emergency septic pump bypass, so we can close that off and finally set aside the last of the outside parts of the emergency bypass.

The hardware store did have their garden centre section open, so I checked it out. I did find watering cans there, but only got one, as the price was pretty steep. I also spotted some lovely looking sage transplants and picked up two. There’s just enough room in the tiny raised bed, with the other herbs, for them.

All of this took long enough that, when I got home, it was already time to do the outside cat feeding, so I took care of that right away. A couple of kittens needed eye washing, and I changed out the ice packs in the sun room cat cage, for Poirot and her babies.

It’s barely past 5pm as I write this, and I am so drained, I’ll be heading to bed pretty much as soon as I’m done supper. Tomorrow is supposed to be even hotter, and then we’re going to cool down a touch for the next while. I’m hoping to get the rest of the transplants in, and maybe even get the direct sowing done. I noticed this morning that some of the Spoon tomatoes have started to show flower buds!

This is what WP’s AI image generator thinks I look like. 😄

At some point, I need to edit my May garden tour video, too. I decided to keep the video files I took, back on the 21st, and here we are, last day of May, and it still hasn’t been put together!

Little by little, it’ll get done.

I just wish there weren’t so many distractions pulling me away, at times!

Food, next, then bed!

The Re-Farmer

Productive!

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Wow. It’s amazing how much can get done in a day, when I can actually stay home for the entire day. Thanks to my daughter doing the mowing yesterday, I could actually focus on the garden! I got enough done that I will actually break it up into several posts.

For now, though, the cuteness!

I had a surprise, yet not surprise, when I went into the sun room to start feeding the yard cats.

After all our attempts to get Poirot and her babies into the cat cage, giving up and upgrading her carrier nest to a larger carrier she seemed happy with, she moved her babies.

Into the cat cage!

Which I was really, really happy to see. They will be much safer there, as they become more active.

In a way, I wasn’t surprised that she moved them, though. When I set up the larger carrier for her, I made a nice bed inside with puppy pads. The past couple of mornings, though, I’ve noticed they were really messed up. I tried straightening them out in the front, over the frozen water bottle I’d tucked into the entry to help cool things down, but realized it was completely bunched up. The kittens were lying on the hard bottom. The puppy pad looked like it had been dug at and pulled from the outside. Which suggested that other cats, or even a skunk or a racoon, had gotten up there and was trying to find a stray piece of kibble or something. At least, that’s my theory.

Whatever her reason, though, Poirot put her babies into the nice, soft cat bed in the cat cage. I was even finding her enjoying her space on the blanket in the other cube, where she could still keep a close eye on her little grublings.

Today was a great day to be outside. Our expected high was 19C/66F, we did actually pass that by a degree or two, depending on which app I look at. We reached our high in the early afternoon, and are only just now, at barely past 7pm, starting to cool down ever so slightly. This morning, however, we had a low of only 3C/37F, and tonight we’re expected to drop to 5C/41F. The highs for the next few days are supposed to keep getting hotter each day, so I was glad to be able to get as much done outside today as I did!

While it was still cool this morning, I refilled the leaking rain barrel and, while that was filling, watered the new transplants, as well as the mulberry, sea buckthorn and highbush cranberry. I don’t water the silver buffaloberry, mostly because there are so many of them, and they look like they are doing just fine as they are.

I did some other watering in the main garden area, before pausing to have breakfast, then getting to work on planting and bed preparation. That area gets full sun, so it didn’t take long to start feeling way too hot!

My brother and his wife came by later in the afternoon, so I used that as an excuse to take a hydration break and say high. My brother had a lot of stuff he wanted to get done, though, and I had to get back to the garden, so I left them to it.

One thing about my brother bringing all his equipment out here is that there are some big jobs that can now get done. My SIL took one of those on and has been using their big riding mower to do the outer yard, including the completely overgrown area where the Korean Pine and walnut trees are (though we still have to plant the rest of the seeds). I headed out to see after I finished in the garden, and am just blown away. This is one of the areas I gave up on trying to keep mowed because it was so rough, and I got tired of breaking lawnmowers.

What a difference having the right equipment makes!

We’ve been using their smaller riding mower, and have permission to use the big one, too. We’ll just have to learn how! It’s a zero turn mower, so it doesn’t have a steering wheel.

My brother and his wife selling their acreage is going to change a lot for us. We are going to be seeing them a lot more often, which is always awesome, but with my brother’s help, we’ll be able to start getting things done here that we simply haven’t been able to, mostly because the tools and equipment that should have been here when we moved in had disappeared. That’s one of the reasons my mother originally asked us to move out here, when she still owned the property. They’ve got plans for things completely outside our scope, too. For the past few years, I’ve been feeling like we have been falling behind so much, simply because things are breaking down and wearing out faster than we can do anything about them, even if we did have all the tools and equipment. Add in various health issues of our own, taking care of things for my mother, vehicle issues, etc., and it felt like a losing battle, and I was feeling like I was letting my brother down. Now, I actually feel hopeful again!

Best of all, though, is just being able to see them more often. They’re just really awesome people, and I thank God for them both!

I also thank God for today being such a productive day. It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to get so much done in a day! It won’t be much longer before we can safely start transplanting and direct sowing things that have to wait until after or last frost date, and there is still much to prepare!

Which I will go into, in my next post…

The Re-Farmer

Back online

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Well, it got figured out. Sort of. After trying all the usual rebooting and turning things off and on, my husband physically unplugged and re-plugged in all the physical connections. When he was done, we had internet again. How the power being shut off briefly would have caused that, I have no idea.

Speaking of having no idea, at some point yesterday, a cat walked on my keyboard. I have no idea what combinations of buttons got stepped on, but I now have every letter, space and punctuation I type showing up in boxes as the bottom of my screen, along with and “backspace” and “break”. This has happened before, and I figured out how to shut it off, but this time, I just can’t find how again. I’ll have to figure it out later. For now, I’ve got stuff to do!

First up, though, is some cuteness. I puttered around after feeding the outside cats for the evening and discovered two of them on top of the raised bed cover in the old kitchen garden!

One of them is more feral and ran off when I stopped to get my phone out, but Kohl is looking like she’s settling right down for a nap!

It’s a good thing this cover can support their weight, and the netting is secured snug enough that they don’t end up pushing it through the larger openings in the fence wire.

The ornamental apple trees are in full bloom right now, and just buzzing with polinators!

It’s such a gorgeous evening right now, I’m probably going to head out again, after I’m done writing this, even though it’s already past 8:30pm.

This morning was fairly routine, before I headed out to my mother’s. My daughter offered to do weed trimming and mowing for me while I was gone, so we walked about that for a while. She was happy when I suggested using the riding more first, as I knew for sure it had more gas in it. She wasn’t sure we had permission to use it.

I headed out early enough to get a bit of gas before heading to my mother’s, though it turned out to be too early to grab some fried chicken for my lunch, since my mother was getting her Meals on Wheels today. When I got to her place, she had been lying down in bed again, and was really struggling to get up and move around. She says her mobility is getting worse, which I can clearly see. Before she was settled, I offered to apply some of the Voltaren topical painkiller, and she quite happily agreed. Her morning med assist visit is supposed to offer to do that for her, but she doesn’t like the idea of the home care workers touching her like that. Fair enough!

That done, we were starting to settle down to go over her shopping list, when she commented that I was “hiding my beautiful hair”, because I didn’t take my hat off, like I usually do. I told her, yes, I’m hiding my “beautiful hair” because every time she sees my hair, she had something nasty to say about it (even when she compliments my hair, she does it in such a way that it’s actually an insult). Her response was to tell me that it’s because I braid my hair and only little girls wear braids. I reminded her that her mother always kept her very long hair in a braid. Oh, but she wore it rolled up on the back of her head all the time! I said no, not all the time. I remember her braid was so long, it reached her bum.

In the end, she basically said that having short hair is easier (for her), therefore older women should all have short hair like she does. I told her, I find it easier to have a braid. Oh, when you’re in your 90’s like me, you’ll feel different.

*facepalm*

At least she was not being actively nasty about it.

We went over her shopping list and added a few things she hadn’t thought of. She also had a list for things to pick up at the pharmacy, including more Voltaren. Now that she’s using it on her back as well as her knees, she’s going through it a faster, and she doesn’t want to run out. Which is a real switch for her. She usually waits until the last moment before replacing things or getting refills.

Since I was going to the pharmacy anyhow, I decided to go into her lock box and take out those bubble packs that have been driving her nuts. One of them had just a single bubble for her evening meds in it, while another had one bubble of morning meds and one of suppertime meds in it. The equivalent of 1 day’s worth of pills, but each bubble was in a different day of the week. The home care workers refusing to give them to her on the “wrong” day is what’s driving her absolutely bonkers. It’s like she goes into an instant rage. I told her I would take them to the pharmacy. She has about 1 1/2 weeks left in her current bubble packs, so she’ll be getting refills done next week. I told her I would give them to the pharmacist. She started telling me to make sure they knew she had already paid for these (which… of course they do. She wouldn’t have them, otherwise), so they don’t throw them away. I told her, I would explain it to them, and they will take care of things.

One thing I noticed and remembered to ask before I headed out; her Tuesday morning meds are still in their bubble. Today is Friday, and all the other bubbles in between are properly used. What happened on Tuesday?

Apparently, no one showed up to do her med assist on Tuesday morning. I did not get a call, and my mother didn’t call to tell me there was a problem, either.

*sigh*

Today is her day in the common laundry room, so we got that ready, too. My mother, of course, giving me detailed instructions on how to do the laundry, even though I’ve already done her laundry before and know how she likes it done. Then, when her Meals on Wheels arrived, I got her laundry started, then headed out to do her shopping while she enjoyed her lunch. It looked and smelled delicious!

I did remember to grab the bubble packs for the pharmacist and explained the situation. They can’t repackage them, but she did understand why I had to get them out! My mother was getting downright abusive about it.

My mother had only 4 things on her shopping list at the pharmacy, yet it still came out to just over $60. Ouch.

I did her grocery shopping next, and that came out to just under $60! She didn’t need a lot, but it was still quite a few items. On both lists there was an ‘if it’s in the budget’ item that I didn’t get. As it turned out, since I paid the small change myself so she get round numbers back, she had only a dollar left of the cash she gave me for her shopping – and even then, it was because I suggested she might not have enough, after looking at her pharmacy shopping list, so she added a bit more to her envelope of cash she gives me for her shopping.

When I got back, my mother as busily picking up rugs and bashing them with her cane to get the dust off, in preparation for me to sweep her floors. Not something she should have been doing, but she just couldn’t just sit there, waiting for me to come back and do it.

I know that feel.

I did get her to sit down on her comfy chair while I put her groceries away. Then I grabbed her water bottles that needed refilling (there’s a tap in the laundry room that has a water softener on it, that she uses for drinking and cooking water) and switched her laundry to the dryers. She had actually forgotten about her laundry! One machine was still going through its final spin, though, so the timing worked out.

That done, I got the sweeping done for her, then made sure everything was put back properly. I do wish she would get rid of her little rugs. They are such tripping hazards! But, the floor makes her feet cold, so she wants the rugs. 😔

Once everything was settled, I remembered to get out my mother’s blood pressure machine and get a reading. I try to remember to do that every time I’m at her place for any length of time. I got her pulse oximeter set up, too, but it has the hardest time getting a reading. Her fingers are so twisted from arthritis, it doesn’t have proper contact. I had to try three different fingers before we could get a reading!

Then we had a chance to just sit and visit for a bit. She even asked me how things went with my appointment for the truck yesterday. I told her how it went, and now the adjusted was trying to blame things on previous damage, and that I was expecting a call from the autobody shop some time today to get full information. I mentioned the potential issue with painting after they fix the bent box frame, because of the rust.

Mentioning rust turned out to be a distraction. I barely finished talking when she suddenly declared, “now let me tell you something about me!”

She then vaguely indicated towards her stove and was talking about this terrible problem of rust she has. She didn’t have the word for what she was talking about, but seemed to think I could read her mind and know what she meant! Her gestures were so vague that, even though she was verbally saying “stove”, she seemed to be indicating the counter… or the sink? I finally had to ask. That made her instantly furious as she got up and started trying to tear off an element to show me. I was able to get her to stop and before she broke something!

It turned out she was talking about the drip pan under the element.

I had to look up the name of it, just now! 😄

It was completely rusted out, to the point of having holes in it. Which is bizarre, because I know this stove was replaced after she moved here, so it’s less than 10 years old.

My talking about rust on the truck reminded her about her drip pan, and how she had asked the cleaning staff if she was responsible for replacing it, or the public housing department that owns the building. They didn’t know but said they would ask. My mother later got a two page letter explaining the things they did and didn’t cover… but nothing specifically about the drip pan, so she still doesn’t know!

I told her, I’d just replace it myself. I took a picture and passed it on to my siblings so that one of us could pick up a replacement for her, when we have the chance.

After a while, my mother sent me to check on the driers, and told me to take them out if they were dry, even if the machines weren’t done. They were on their cool down cycle, so that’s what I ended up doing.

Once I started folding and putting them away, my mother let me know she was done by sitting in her armchair and turning on her TV, really loud. 😄 When I was done, she barely acknowledged when I gave her a hug and a kiss goodbye. 😄

While all this as going on, I got messages from the family. While my daughter was out using the weed trimmer, which is electric, someone from the electric company came by to say they were going to be shutting off the power for about half an hour. My husband, sweetheart that he is, made sure my computer was shut down, first!

They still had just enough data signal to send text messages, so they could keep me up to date. My daughter saw them working on the main power pole, so she went out to ask about what they were doing. There was just a small part at the top that was getting replaced. She was told they will be increasing the voltage to the power grid, and had to replace parts so they could handle the increase. Which means they are going to every single farm and rural household to do this! That’s going to take a while!

Once the power was back up, the internet was still out. When I got home, I tried contacting the electric company, but they aren’t listed in the phone books we have (yes, we still have phone books!). I even tried calling 411, but only got a busy signal. Eventually, I went outside with my phone and logged into the electric company’s app, dug until I found a number I could call, and got through. After explaining things, he checked, and all was clear at his end. Which meant we had to contact our internet provider. Which is Starlink.

Which would require logging into their app. Which I couldn’t do, because my upgraded phone doesn’t have my husband’s computer generated, unhackable password stored in it – and after fighting with it while I was gone, my husband ended up having to medicate and go to bed for a couple of hours.

Meanwhile, the woman from the autobody shop had called, so I had time to call her back.

*sigh*

First, the insurance company will not cover the cost of the tail light. The damage is not consistent with the claim.

They will cover part of the cost of the painting that will be required, but we’ll be responsible for $140 of it.

We will have to pay 30% of the cover, on top of the $500 deductible. A cover could cost up to $2000, so we could be paying up to another $600 on top of everything else.

Part of the problem is, there’s not enough left of the cover for them to know what a similar replacement would be.

She asked me questions about it and said she would look for photos to send me, so I can see which one is most like what we already had. As for the tail light, I would have to talk directly to the adjuster about that.

Once I had the time, I started going back into my old photos to find pictures of the cover (turned out, there are none that show enough of the cover to be useful) and for proof of what I was saying about the tail light.

I might have to eat some crow.

I found the pictures I took of the truck when it was still in the lot. No crack in the tail light.

No dent under the tail light.

I thought that dent was already there, because I’ve never backed into anything that would cause that damage. The only time I’ve accidentally backed into something, it was the kibble house because I had the tailgate down and couldn’t see how close it was. The damage was to the kibble house, not the truck, and the paint is yellow, not white like what’s in the dent.

The only more recent picture I could find was taken the day I met the Cat Lady for the catio they donated to use. In there, you can see a bit of white paint above the tail light, no cracks in the tail light – but I was taking a picture of the load, not the truck, so the very bottom of the tail light is not in the frame. No proof that the dent was there, with an intact tail light.

Meanwhile, I’m now wondering how that dent got there and when. As for the crack itself, it’s large enough that I would have noticed it earlier. At least, I think I would have! Now I’m second guessing myself.

*sigh*

In the end, though, I have no way to prove that the tail light was intact before the cover was blown off, and nothing to show when that dent showed up.

Well, we’re not going to get any further ahead on this until after the weekend.

As much of a pain that it is, the main thing is to get that frame repaired and a new box cover, and my older daughter has said she will help us with paying for the cost above the deductible.

We’ll find out how much that is, once we figure out what type of cover is closest to what was lost.

Who know getting this taken care of would be such a pain???

The Re-Farmer

Take the good where it comes

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Today has not been a good day.

It hasn’t been a completely bad day, though, so I’ll start with the good stuff.

How about some cuteness?

I gave Poirot new digs, and she accepted them.

The first photo is the carrier she insisted in putting her babies into. As you can see, they fit, but she doesn’t really have room to stretch out.

We have a larger carrier that was sitting on the platform supported by the shelf this little carrier is on. When I had a chance this afternoon, with Poirot outside, I made the move. I prepped a puppy pad on the bottom of the big carrier, removed the loose top of the small carrier, then started moving babies.

Hastings (the almost all white one) had one eye stuck shut, so she (pretty sure they’re all female) got an eye wash, first. She wasn’t happy with it, which got Poirot’s attention from outside. I put Hastings into the big carrier, then moved of Miss Lemon (the white and grey), who did not need any eye washing, before picking up Japp (the black with white on her belly). By then, Poirot was jumping up to the small carrier and the platform and looing around, but make no move to stop me when I picked up Japp.

Instead, she went to the bigger carrier on the platform and joined her other babies!

Japp had a sticky eye that got washed before being returned to mama, who was contentedly nursing. You can see them all in the second picture.

This carrier is large enough that, when I set out her personal food bowl, there was room for it inside the carrier. She was quite happy with that!

I took the small carrier out and gave it a wash. Later on, when Poirot was once again outside, I shifted the bitter carrier to where the smaller one was, where there is a sun shield at the window side to keep them from overheating. It was warm enough that I tucked a frozen water bottle under the puppy pad near the front. The kittens were all cuddled at the far end of the carrier and barely noticed being moved.

Another good thing today is that I got the luffa transplanted, but only because I wasn’t up to doing the other stuff I’d intended to work on today. It was something I could do, just so I could get at least something productive done outside! That will get a separate post, though.

The day actually started out pretty good, in that I got sleep! I’d used the Voltaren stuff for the first time, along with my usual prescription painkillers, before going to bed. At first, I thought it wasn’t making any difference. As soon as I lie down, my hips and knees start becoming acutely painful, as did my left shoulder and elbow. My finger joints were hurting, too, as usual.

Yet, I fell asleep before midnight, and didn’t wake up until the cats woke me up at 4am. I distracted them by topping up their kibble and closed most of them out of my bedroom, so Butterscotch could use the litter box without getting bothered, and went back to bed. I fell asleep again almost immediately and slept another two hours, waking only slightly when I heard someone opening my door to let the cats in before they started scratching at it.

It was the closest thing to a pain free sleep I’ve had in …. I can’t remember.

So this stuff works better than the prescription topical painkiller the doctor tried me on, years ago – and my OA wasn’t as painful as it is now!

Just as an experiment, I applied some to my husband’s lower back, where the worst of his injury is, just a little while ago. If this stuff will help him, too, even a little bit, that would be a huge improvement for his quality of life! Lord knows, the drugs are barely keeping things bearable for him.

Then, there’s the not so good stuff.

While my daughter and I had been coming home from the city, yesterday, I’d got a call from home care letting me know they didn’t have anyone for my mother’s suppertime med assist. So we swung by on the way home and I set her meds out for her – only to have the home care person show up, anyhow!

This morning, after I’d done my morning rounds, I had just enough time to grab breakfast before I needed to go to town for the appointment with the insurance company rep about the truck. I was just sitting down with my food when the phone rang.

It was home care.

They didn’t have anyone for my mother’s morning med assist, though I was assured they had someone for supper and before bed.

My mother is supposed to get her meds between 7 and 9. It was about 8:45 when the call came in.

It takes 25-30 minutes to get to my mother’s place.

So I quickly put my food back in the kitchen and left immediately. I didn’t take the time to call my mother, nor did I try to call her using the hands free unit my brother gave me, because I knew my mother would be angry and start going off on me. I did not need the delay, and I certainly didn’t need that while driving.

It was the right decision.

When I got to my mother’s place, I knocked and went in, calling out “Hi, Mom” a few times. There was no response, but she was in the bathroom – with the door open. In her tiny apartment, that meant I had to close up the bathroom door just to get in far enough to close her entry door!

By then, she had made an acknowledging response, so I started to say that I got a call from home care, telling me there was no one for this morning, while getting her lock box and little bowl for counting out her pills ready.

Then my mother comes out of the bathroom, starting to talk, saw me and stopped in her tracks. Oh! It’s you! I thought it was home care!

…

I don’t think they normally come into her apartment calling out “hi, Mom”, so I guess that meant she didn’t hear properly.

Maybe it’s time to get her hearing tested! I don’t know that it’s ever been done for her.

I moved aside so my mother could sit in her chair at her dining table, before working on the combination lock. My mother was still standing just outside the bathroom, leaning on the other chair at her table, and half blocking my way.

She was angry, and wouldn’t move.

After it was clear she wasn’t going to sit down, I went back to opening up the lock box.

My mother was on a rant.

She is obsessed with those pills from missed days in older bubble packs. She wanted me to give them to her. I had already mentioned I didn’t have much time, because of my appointment in town (a 15-20 minute drive from our place, but a 30+ minute drive from my mother’s., which I’d told her about yesterday.

She started saying that, if it was illegal for them to take pills from different days to give to her, then it’s also illegal for them to not show up to give her her pills at all, and having me come out to do it for them.

All I could say is, Mom, I don’t have time for this.

She eventually sat down, but was now accusing me of “being on their side”. Then she started saying how we (my siblings and I) are not taking care of her and leaving her in the hands of strangers. All I could say at the time was, none of us live here. I certainly didn’t have time to go into it beyond that!

I got her pills from the correct bubble for the day out, which got her angry about the pills again. I was “on their side”. I got the pills in her little bowl and made notes about what was doing in the notebook I now keep in the lock box for the home care workers to see, and got her inhaler out.

She did take her inhaler, though that was weird. She’s supposed to take a few deep breaths first, exhale, inhale the puffer, hold for a count of ten, then rinse out her mouth. She even had a cup of water waiting for that.

She started taking the breaths, but had trouble doing the exhale before using the puffer. After a few times of not taking a puff, she started forcing herself to burp. For some time, she’s been going on about how she burps so much, and it’s such a problem, only to eventually say that she’s making herself burp because it helps her chest pains.

…

Whatever.

This was the first time I’ve seen/heard her doing it like this, though. First, I have no idea how she was doing it. Where was she getting all this abdominal air from? Second, it was really really gross – and it takes a lot to gross me out! She managed to keep it up for almost a minute, too, before finally taking her puffer.

That done, I started putting things away into the lock box, and she started railing again – but not taking her pills. She said that she was thinking of taking a hammer to the lock box. I told her, that (her attitude) is why you have a lock box! Then I told her (again) that I had to go to my appointment and was in a hurry. Oh, you’re always in a hurry.

…

So, yeah. She was nasty right from the moment she saw it was me and not the home care worker, right to the moment I left.

I did make it to the appointment location in time (it was just in a parking lot!). There was someone else being finished up, so I had time to send messages to my family about how things went with my mother. I wasn’t quite done when the other vehicle got their paperwork and left, and the insurance rep came to me.

We talked about what happened, and he took pictures.

With the box cover, he started talking about how this was the second one he had this week, and that these Velcro types have a habit of getting caught in the wind. Over time, the Velcro just doesn’t hold as well, getting full of dust or whatever. Basically, making it sound like it was more likely a product fault, which the insurance wouldn’t cover.

I showed him the bent part of the frame and the broken tail light. Under the tail light, there’s a dent from before we had the truck, and the crack in the tail light ends just above it. He tried to say that the impact from whatever caused this dent broke the tail light. I told him, the tail like was not broken before. I did mention that we’ve only had the vehicle for just over a year. While it’s certainly likely that, whatever caused that dent had broken the tail light, it had been fixed before we bought it.

One of the things that was noted and the took pictures of was a crack in the fender. The truck had rusted spots when we bought it. I don’t really care about what are essentially cosmetic issues. Along the edge of the fender, framing the wheel well, there’s a section with more rust. The crack is in that section. It actually is a new crack, but I never bothered mentioning it, since it was clearly cracked because of the older rust damage that was already there. I didn’t bother telling him that the crack was new. I just confirmed that the rust and other little dents and dings were old damage.

After he did his inspection, he went to his own vehicle to process the claim to get an estimate. That gave me time to finish updating the family.

End result with the claim.

He couldn’t even find the replacement value of the box cover, since there was nothing like it in his system. The estimated repair cost he came up with was just over $1000, and we could pay our $500 deductible. A replacement cover would be a new, improved version, so we would also have to pay 30% of the difference for “betterment”.

Once I got the estimate, I went straight to the company we’d be taking it to, which was just a block or two away. I had talked to them on the phone, previously, and our mechanic recommended them to me, as they are authorized to handle insurance claims like this.

Of course, since I literally just got the estimate, it was too early to be in the system for them to download the claim file. She did go out to look at the truck with me.

As she couldn’t look into the claim file to see the details, she couldn’t give me any hard information. She did explain to me that, with when they fix the bend in the frame, so new cover can be installed, they will have to paint the frame. That area of rust, where it was thin enough to crack, would be a problem when it comes to painting. I told her, I really don’t care about the paint, but it’s something they are required to do.

So… we might have to pay extra for rust repair, as that is not at all covered by the insurance, nor would I expect it to be.

As we were talking about the 30% betterment and so on, I told her, we might not be able to cover much. We can do the $500 deductible, but anything beyond that, well… we’re on a fixed income. She understood.

Tomorrow, she will download the file, then talk to the insurance company. When she has some hard numbers and confirmed data, she will give me a call.

I completely forgot, though. Tomorrow, I’m going to be at my mother’s. I’ve got her grocery shopping to do, plus I expect to be doing her laundry (Fridays are her scheduled turn for the shared laundry room) and whatever else she needs doing. She’ll have her Meals on Wheels for lunch, but I would want to make sure she has things she can easily put together for her meals during the weekend.

I’ll just have to make sure someone in the house has the phone with them while I’m gone!

So we may or may not be able to get the truck fixed and get a new box cover. We’ll figure that out, some time tomorrow.

By the time I got home, I was wasted. I’d spent probably less than 5 minutes at my mother’s, and she sucked all the energy out of me in that short time. When I got home, I ended up crashing for a couple of hours. While I certainly needed the rest, I woke up feeling like I’d wasted precious time in my day, plus I didn’t have the physical energy left to do most of the things on my to-do list. I won’t be able to them tomorrow, either, because I won’t be home. I’ll be at home mother’s, and I know that by the time I get home from helping her out, I’ll have zero energy to get anything done outside. Thank God I’ve got the girls taking care of things inside, so I don’t have to worry about that, too!

Then, to top things off, while I was at my computer, getting some stuff done while listening to a YouTube video, my sound suddenly disappeared.

After much checking of the system, everything was fine.

I checked the connections on the speakers, which required moving way too many things to access the back of the tower, that all checked out fine, too.

I tested it using my Bluetooth sleep headphones.

They worked fine.

I eventually gave up in frustration, then headed outside to feed the outside cats and get at least one things accomplished in potting up the luffa.

My husband, sweetheart that he is, unhooked and brought over set of speakers for me. They can be plugged into the tower, or be used with Bluetooth, so when I got back inside, I got my speakers out and hooked his up on Bluetooth.

They didn’t work.

We checked the power bar. It seemed fine. I flicked the switch back and forth, but there was no change.

Eventually, my husband was able to look and see where I’m too short to see, and discovered the power bar’s plug to the wall was half out. I keep that blocked off so that cats can’t mess with the cords, so it took some doing for him to be able to reach and plug it back in.

Still nothing.

I tried the switch on the power bar again.

It turned on.

*sigh*

My husband, meanwhile, took my speakers to test them out on his computer. It turned out that there was a loose connection, even though I’d checked them, and they seemed fine!

*sigh*

I didn’t have the energy to switch them back again, so I now have my husband’s Bluetooth speakers, and he’s got my old ones. These were speakers he kept on his headboard to play basically white noise to help him sleep.

Well, we’ll see how it works out.

My daughter just swung by a little while ago and showed me something else that I can add to the “good” list for the day. She just spent the past couple of hours in the basement, with baking soda, water and a toothbrush, cleaning the smoke damage off the book stand I salvaged form our tiny, historical burned out church after the closing services. I’m still debating going back for the benches or a pew, if someone else hasn’t already taken them. I know I’ll regret it if I don’t, but we just don’t have anywhere to store them until they can be used in the future.

I remember admiring this book stand when I was an altar server. The one that was used regularly was on the altar, and was a rather plain wooden stand. This one was sparkly “gold” with glittering “gems” in the front, and was kept in a tiny room on one side, where the priest got ready for services. Us altar servers would get ready in a tiny room on the opposite side then, just before mass started, cross over to join the priest for the procession. The room where we would get ready is where the back door was located, and that was where the person who broke in, started the fire. That room was completely burnt out, but the other room was surprisingly undamaged, other than smoke. This book stand was completely blackened with smoke, except for where there had been a crochet doily on the adjustable book rest. That left a clearer pattern in the smoke.

My daughter wasn’t able to get the black completely off; she didn’t want to damage the surface by scrubbing more. She did get it looking gold again, and while not as clear and shiny as they used to be, the glass “gems” look like gems again. She did an amazing job! I’ll have to try and get a picture of it in nice, bright light.

My mother was very happy when I told her I’d taken it home, and asked if she could see it again. I should bring it with me, tomorrow, to show it to her.

After showing me her handiwork, my daughter asked me what there was that she could do for me outside, tomorrow, while I’m gone. She’s going to try and finish the lawn mowing for me. I still have to refill the jerry can of fuel for the mowers, but haven’t been able to get done, yet, so she’ll do as much as she can before running out of gas. 😄

As for me, I should probably call my mother about tomorrow. Her evening med assist should be happening around now, so I know she’ll be up and about, at least!

Then I’ll share about how the transplanting went in my next post. 😊😊

The Re-Farmer

Long day… so tired…

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I did at least get quite a bit accomplished today!

The main thing was to get our new plants into the ground. I did my rounds, as usual, then took the time to dig holes for the haskap, while waiting for the post office to open.

The old rain barrel was so empty, I barely had water to scoop with the buck to put into the new holes. Before refilling it, I decided to move it closer to the gooseberry and apple tree. That way, if it was going to leak, it could water them at the same time! I left the hose to fill the barrel while getting other things done, the water off before digging the holes. That didn’t take very long, even with the roots and rocks, since the holes didn’t need to be particularly deep. You can see by the water line in the barrel that a third of the water was gone by the time I was done!

Once the post office was open, I went and got our parcel. I’d brought the bucket with the remains of the brick of coconut coir that was reconstituted. The haskap plugs in particular were getting dried out, so after I’d added some of the soaked coir to the ground soil in the wheelbarrow, I added more water, then tucked in the transplants. That way, any soil kept with the roots wouldn’t get washed away.

We’d buried our Freya pretty deep, then added rocks on top to make sure no critters dug her up. The remaining top soil was left in the wheelbarrow, and I added the last of a bag of indoor-outdoor potting soil my brother gave us, along with the coir, and mixed it together. Then the plum tree was planted.

I used the rocks to create a ring around the “moat” I made around the plum tree. This area gets pretty dry, so I created a trench for water to flow into, then slowly get absorbed around the roots, while making sure the soil around the base of the stem didn’t get washed away. I used grass clippings to mulch on top of the trench, and returned the tomato cage to deter the deer from nibbling on it. Last of all, I returned some of my daughters flowers for Freya, and added some fresh dandelion flowers as well.

For the haskap, I returned the sod to the holes, root side up, to partially refill the holes, then added the rest of the soil mix in the wheelbarrow. The haskap plugs were pretty small, so I had to be careful not to accidentally bury them too deep! As with the plum, I made a moat around them and filled them with water before mulching with grass clippings. I also “stole” a couple of wire tomato cages from the raspberries nearby that didn’t survive. I’ll have to come back later with a rake to clean up properly around the transplants, but other than that, they are done! Yay!

Today I also had a trip to Walmart planned, so I made sure to NOT take my prescription painkillers, since they have a possible side effect of drowsiness. Not that I’ve notice anything changed on that. With or without them, there are times when I feel like I’m ready to fall asleep. If it’s at my keyboard, that’s not a big deal, but it is if I’m driving!

After I was done with the planting, I ended up asking my daughter if she could drive me today. This turned out to be a good thing. My daughters recently ordered an air conditioner for their upstairs “apartment”, which was to be picked up at a Home Depot in the city. She checked, and it was ready for pick up today. There’s a Walmart right next to the Home Depot location it was at, so it was a a trip to the bigger city, instead of the smaller, closer one, today.

When we got there, we stopped for a late lunch, first, then my daughter went to get the AC unit while I went looking at pre-hung exterior doors, since we need to replace the entire frame. That means no more storm door. Looking at the options, there is an exterior door that has a window that can be opened in it that would be idea. I didn’t have the measurements of our doorway, but we’re looking at what would be over $800, after taxes. Doors with no windows, or just some window in the top, where cheaper, of course, but we’re still looking at at least $600. They don’t do installations outside the city, so we’d have to find someone locally to install it for us, and the company my brother used that installed the new windows before we moved in seems to have gone out of business during the illegal lockdowns.

At least we have a ball-park figure for the door. Now we have to come up with the money, and get it installed before winter!

The AC unit my daughters got is the portable type, meant to fit into a window. The windows we have don’t work for that, so they’ll have to board up much of the window space. After picking up the unit, my daughter then went to the lumber section and found the supplies they needed.

The next thing we had to do was secure things in the box of the truck, since we no longer have a cover on it. Thankfully, we keep ratchet straps in the truck at all times now, and my daughter was able to climb into the box and get it secured.

That done, we headed for the Walmart. My daughter stayed with the truck, to make sure no one walked away with the AC unit (another reason we miss that box cover!). I picked up what was needed, but none of it came out of our household budget, so I didn’t bother with my usual shopping cart picture. I did get several more large bags of kibble, plus a case of canned cat food. These were heavy enough that we loaded them around the AC unit, so there was no chance of anything sliding around!

By the time we were done and heading out of the city, it was just past 4pm, when my cell phone rang. I am so unused to my cell phone being used as a phone, we were both confused by what the noise was!

It turned out to be home care.

No one was going to be available for my mother’s suppertime med assist.

Which would have been done shortly after 5pm, so that actually worked out perfectly. We would go to my mother’s down on the way home, and I’d run in to do get her meds out of the lock box and set up for her. I wouldn’t be able to stay long, though, as we had frozen stuff. They were in an insulated bag, but we didn’t bring any ice packs, so we had to get them home quickly.

I didn’t bother calling my mother to let me know we were on the way; a call with my mother while driving is not a good thing, even on hands free! She would be angry about home care not coming, and my having to cover for them, and I just couldn’t have that conversation while driving.

When I got to my mother’s place and went through the lobby to her apartment, I hear someone call to me.

It was my mother!

I never even saw her! She’s so small, she just disappeared into the chair she was in. 😄

I told her about the call I got from home care, and that I was there to get her supper medications for her. My mother, meanwhile, thought I was there because she’d called our place and left a message! My husband must have been asleep when she called, because he didn’t message me to let me know there was a call, like he usually does.

So I had no idea about her call but, she told me, she has her list…

She was wanting to arrange a grocery shopping trip.

Normally, I would have been able to come back tomorrow, but I’ve got the appointment for the insurance inspection of the truck. Once we got her back to her apartment, I told her about this. She actually seemed happy to hear that the insurance company could cover replacing the box cover and do repairs. We’ll see how it actually works out, after the inspection, though.

I got my mother’s meds out – she wanted me to take some of the pills that were lift in other bubble packs due to things getting messed up, but I didn’t even check to see what days and times they were for; I was just checking to see if my mother needed new bubble packs for her, which she doesn’t. She still got so very angry that I wouldn’t use the other pills, and started commenting on how stupid home care is for sticking to the exact days and times for the pills…

…

I just focused on recording my taking care of her pills in a notebook for the next home care person to see. It was still a bit early for her to take them, so they were just in the tiny tagine bowl I gave her to hold her meds and count them out.

Once everything was done and the lock box put away, and I was getting ready to leave, there was a knock at the door.

It was the home care aid.

We were both rather confused.

It turns out that someone had been added to her schedule and, for some reason, the scheduler started calling to cancel her other visits. When she found out this was being done, she told the scheduler to stop because it wasn’t needed – and especially wasn’t something that could be cancelled for a person with a lock box! But they did at least call me and, since we were on our way home from the city, there was no extra trip to do it. The home care aid was very frustrated that they’d called me at all. Obviously, she was still able to do the med assist!

This same person would be coming back for the before bed med assist, too.

I had to rush off, but the home care aid, on seeing I’d already done the med assist, left at the same time.

Normally, they would stay to make sure my mother actually took her pills.

Now that I’ve written this, I find myself hoping she actually did take them once she had food to take them with! I’m sure she did, but with my mother, you never quite know!

From there, we finally headed home and got the truck unloaded. I’m really glad my daughter was able to come along. I was feeling well enough to drive home, and just having someone there to talk to seems to have been enough to keep me from getting sleepy. I’ll have to bring my daughter along for trips to the city more often!

By then it was late enough that, once everything was put away, the outside cat feeding and evening rounds needed to be done. Some kittens needed eye washing, too. There was one we couldn’t catch, though.

Once that was done, I got a few more things done outside. My daughter and I went to check on the new trees, and we ended up moving the rain barrel to the opposite side of where I’d set it this morning. Then I refilled it, while watering everything but the silver buffaloberry (there are just too many of those, and they are looking really great). I didn’t fill it all the way to the top, but got the barrel at least 3/4 full before I switched the hose so I could water the garden beds.

In the old kitchen garden, I removed the plastic on the raised bed cover, then re-covered it with mosquito netting. I’m really, really hoping to be able to keep the flea beetles out and finally get some kohl rabi! Plus, it can be watered through the netting, without having to move the cover off.

That done, I made some recordings for a garden tour video. I’ve gone through them, but I don’t know that I’ll use them, or if I’ll make new recordings tomorrow. The ones I took aren’t bad, but they just don’t seem good, either – but that could be because by the time I watched them, I was just too tired!

It’s been a longer day than planned on, and I am more than ready to hit the hay! Hopefully, I’ll even get a decent night’s sleep. Between the cats and the arthritis pain, even with painkillers, my sleep is frequently interrupted.

One of the things I picked up today is the same stuff my mother uses on her knees, and now on her lower back, and she finds it makes a huge difference. I’ve used up my tube of Tei Fu lotion and, while that stuff helps, it isn’t a topical painkiller, like this other stuff is. (Voltaran, I think it’s called) I’ve actually had prescription topical painkillers before and found they didn’t make much difference. It would be rather funny is this stuff works better than the prescription stuff!

I’m not holding out much hope that it’ll work, but it’s worth a try!

The Re-Farmer

Kitty status, garden status, and a lovely outing

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Last night, things did drop to freezing, so I’m glad we brought the transplants in from the portable greenhouse last night. When I headed out to do the morning rounds, it was only about 1C/34F, but it was just below 10C/50F in the portable greenhouse, so they got moved back in this morning.

After I did some repairs.

The garbage can I’m using as a heat sink doesn’t have a lid, so I’d been using a square of leftover 3/4″ rigid insulation as a lid, weighed down with a brick, and holding the thermometer. With the tears at the bottom of the door zippers from wind damage, cats can get in and out. They don’t jump up onto the wire shelves much; the wire forms 1″ squares, and I don’t think it’s comfortable for them to try and walk on. They do like to sit on the insulation, though.

Well, I came out one morning, and the insulation was broken in to, fallen into the garbage can, along with the brick and the thermometer. I haven’t spotted where it’s leaking yet, but it was less than half full at the time.

Looking around for something else to cover the garbage can with, the only thing I found that was large enough was one of the old window screens we used for things like curing onions in the fall. The smallest of the screens is still a pretty long rectangle, but it cover the entire top of the garbage can, so I gave it a try. Unfortunately, for the last couple of nights, I’ve been finding it knocked off the garbage can. This morning, it was knocked off again, in spite of my efforts to stabilize it, and this time a corner tore through the back of the plastic cover on the greenhouse.

*sigh*

I taped it up as best I could with clear duct tape. For now, I’ve tried covering the garbage can with overlapping bin lids and the broken pieces of rigid insulation from before.

Most of the transplants are too call to use the lids on the bins, so we can’t stack them all like we could before. Being able to use lids on just two of the bins to stack on top of is the only reason we can fit all the trays and bins on the chest freezer in the old kitchen. So the transplants got to spend the day in the relative warmth of the portable greenhouse for the day, but we’ve already brought them in again for the night. From the forecast, we’ll probably have to do it again for one more night before we can safely leave them in the portable greenhouse overnight again.

The winter sown bed that has a plastic mesh cover on it seemed to handle the overnight cold just fine. I can see there are some carrots coming up, and the others whatever radishes, beets and turnips that survived the winter. The radishes should grow the fastest, so we should be able to identify and harvest those earliest. That will make more space for the other root vegetables in the process. For now, though, I have no real clue what is what!

In the next photo, you can see the plastic over where we’d winter sown flowers was torn badly by the wind. All it took was a small tear at one end, from the tip of one of the bamboo stakes set across the top, and this morning, it was all wrecked.

There are a lot of seedlings coming up in there but I recognize them from when we grew pumpkins and gourds here, last year. They are all weeds.

This bed will be replanted with flowers, soon.

In the last photo, difficult to see against the soil, is a potato sprout! Some of the potatoes we planted already had pretty long sprouts on them, and one of them broke through the soil rather quickly.

The mesh over this bed is good for keeping the cats out, but the mesh isn’t fine enough to keep the Chinese Elm seeds out! The seed development hasn’t anywhere near its peak, yet, and already there are seeds everywhere.

I so look forward to when we can get rid of all the Chinese elm. They cause way too many problems!

After I did my rounds, I had a quick breakfast, then headed out. Before I get into that, though, I must share the cuteness!

In the first photo, if you look carefully, you can see there are 7 kittens, from 3 litters, mashed into that cat bed! The only one “missing” is Sir Robin, who was already out and running around.

The next photo was taken while I was gathering the bowls out of the cat house entry, for the evening feeding.

I was able to get a good photo of Poirot’s three this evening. The black on (Inspector Japp) looks like it’s got a sticky eye that will need washing. The mostly white one – Miss Lemon – is getting pretty active, and I’ve actually seen it fumble out of the carrier briefly, then scramble right back on. The white and grey – Captain Hastings – is also pretty mobile but, so far, has not gone all the way out of the carrier door. Once they get too mobile, Poirot is going to have to put up with them being brought down to floor level!

Last of all is the crowd inside the isolation shelter. I left things plugged in today, for the heat lamp, and it seems they really appreciated it!

Today was too cold and wet to get much done outside, so it was a good time to run some errands, mostly at Walmart. I did get a start on one wet and potentially messy job, though. The new septic ejector is working great, now that it’s no longer frozen, but with the excavation, there is now a lower area at the end of the metal sheet we have to divert the fluid away from the ejector. Normally, it would have naturally flowed towards a low spot nearby, but now it forms a sort of pool. I headed out with a garden hoe and used it to create a small trench to drain the fluid towards the low area, but to get the pool to drain, more small trenches had to be made, because it is all so uneven. In some places, I was able to use the hoe to move some of the clay/gravel nearby, into the lower areas around the edges. What it really needs is for the deepest parts to be filled, but that will be a job for another time. For now, I just want more of it to drain away. The last thing we want is for a small pond to form so close to the ejector. That will prevent the saturated ground around the ejector from drying out, and it’ll just freeze again, next year.

Of course, I sent progress photos to my brother and his wife, so they were up to date about it.

No, I’m not going to post pictures of pooled septic greywater here! 😄

When I did as much as I could and headed back to the house, I made sure to hose down my rubber boots. So much clay was stuck to the bottom of my boots, they felt a couple of pounds heavier, each!

Once I was cleaned up and changed, and had a quick breakfast, I headed out. My brother and his wife aren’t too far away from the Walmart I was going to so, before I left, I messaged them where I was going and asked if they wanted to meet for lunch or something. It turned out their schedule was open, so we made arrangements to meet at a restaurant near the Walmart I was going to.

I got there early, so I went to my other intended stop first; the dollar store nearby. I wanted to pick up more ground staples – can’t have too many of those! – as well as packages of shorter stakes. I got two packs of 25 bamboo stakes, which I am thinking of using to around the snap pea bed to support whatever I find to set around it and keep the deer from eating our peas. I also picked up four 2 packs of 2′ metal stakes. I am thinking to use them to support the hoops intended for the two 4′ square beds. I will probably cut them in half, though. We’ll see when the time comes.

Once done there, I made my way to the restaurant and met up with my brother and his wife. We had a lovely visit. They also talked about some of the things they are planning to do here at the farm, that we aren’t able to do. One of the things that is badly needed it to get more gravel on our driveway. My brother, however, remembers that the last time my late brother used gravel from our own gravel pit, it turned out to make a real mess when things got wet. Likely because there’s so much clay mixed in. They are thinking of buying crushed limestone, or even slag. Slag would be ideal, as it compacts to form a sort of concrete surface. They covered their own driveway on the property they sold with slag, and were very happy with it.

They also told me that they will have a push mower for us to use! We already have permission to use their riding mower, which is currently being stored in the garage near our truck. They’ve actually used it themselves, around where their trailer is stored, but that area is way too rough. Once they can access the tractor stored in the garage again, they’ll use their big rotary mower to cut that area, and my SIL wants to harrow it to level it somewhat.

With our “new” push mower (it’s just a couple of years old) in the small engine shop still, as they try to find the parts needed to fix it (which is highly unlikely), my brother told me about my mother’s old lawnmower that I had talked about wanting to bring in to get fixed, instead. I know it needs a new prime pump, along with general servicing, after sitting for so long. It turns out this mower was actually theirs, originally. They’d bought another push mower for my mother, but the self propeller was too fast for her, and she couldn’t understand that if she let go of the bar, the self propeller would stop and she would just push it. This lawn mower’s self propeller wasn’t as fast, so they ended up trading, and she was very happy with that! My brother told me not to bother taking it in to be serviced. He said he would look it over and could probably fix it himself.

Which means he would be doing that here.

Which means my daughters and I will have the chance to watch and learn, and eventually be able to do it ourselves!

I look forward to that!

After a very enjoyable lunch, we parted ways briefly. They needed to shop at Walmart, too, so we crossed paths a couple of times there, too!

One of the things I wanted to do was look at the garden centre, but it was too cold for the plants to be outside. Instead, the shelves were all jammed around the outdoor furniture displays, and not really accessible. Aside from being crowded, there was a group of people that were just hanging out around the display furniture, while their kids ran around. I didn’t actually need anything, so I moved on.

The main thing I needed to get was more kibble for the outside cat and canned cat food for the inside cats. My brother had gifted me with one of his vehicle hands free devices, so I can take calls while driving. After checking with the girls at home to see if we had an extra USB-A charging cable, I ended up grabbing one for the truck. It took me and a saleswoman quite some time to find one! They only had two, and I picked the longer cable. So I can now link my phone to this device and it will automatically pick up calls for me. My brother is pretty much the only person who calls me on my cell phone – either him, or home care to say there’s no one to cover for my mother’s med assist – so I don’t expect to use it often, but it’s good to have. I never, ever, touch my phone while driving. We’ve lost friends to people talking while driving.

The shopping done, I had a much more pleasant drive home than the drive in. When I left home, it was rather nice, but the further south I drove, the worse the weather. At first, it was like there was a mist all over. Then I saw precipitation, but couldn’t tell if it was rain, or snow! Then it became very clearly snow, and coming down pretty heavy. It all melted on contact, though, so there was no accumulation anywhere. Just poor visibility!

Then it was done and gone, like driving through to the other side of a wall!

The drive home, however, was warmer and dry, which was nice. Once home, the girls helped me unload and they put the groceries away while I did the evening cat feeding, including wet cat food for the kittens. I was able to close up four of the bigger kittens in the sun room, so they could eat their fill. With the bowls that get set into the cat house entry, it’s more of a hope that they and their moms will get a chance to eat their special food (for inside the cat house, I include kitten kibble, too) before some of the other adult cats eat it all. Once they had a good long time to fill their little bellies with wet cat food, I opened up the sun room again and a daughter helped me do my evening rounds, then bring the transplants in for the night.

We’re at 5C/41F as I write this, just past 8pm. It is supposed to very slowly keep getting colder all night, reaching our expected low of 2C/36F at about 6am. That has been the coldest time of the night for the past while, too. Our daytime highs are supposed to warm up nicely over the next few days, but the overnight lows aren’t expected to get much better for some time. At least the days will be warm enough to get work done outside. Including our first mowing of the lawn, once we get the wagon out and go over it to pick up all the smaller branches that have been coming down all winter. The temperatures will be perfect for getting some manual labour done!

So overall, today has been a very good day – but then, any day when I see my brother and his wife is a very good day! 😊😊😊

The Re-Farmer

I am so NOT a morning person

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Not that I’ve got much choice. If it isn’t the morning light, it’s the cats suddenly going bonkers at 5am, expecting me to top of their kibble. Even if there is still plenty of food!

Of course, today, I had to get my morning rounds done earlier, since I needed to be at my mother’s before 8am.

After a daughter and I fed the cats (Poirot stayed in the carrier with her kittens all night, and did not leave while we were putting food out!), I did my usual garden bed checks while on my way to the trail cams.

Alas. It begins.

The Chinese elms are starting to drop their seeds.

This is while they’re still green, too.

Over the next while, there were be more and, when they get to their dry stage, they’ll be falling by the millions.

The netting on this bed will protect it, to a certain extent. Unfortunately, the cats keep managing to slide the netting on the wire hoops, bending them flat, getting inside and so on. So seeds are still getting inside. It won’t be so bad as to smother everything planted in there, at least.

No, that cats are busy doing that, instead.

I had spotted one pea sprouting a while back, and it’s gone. There are some possible beans sprouting, and I’ve spotted some onions sprouting. Plus weeds, of course. While the netting has stopped the cats from using the bed as a litter box, or just digging around because they like to dig, they still either lie on top of the netting, get under the netting, and generally just crush everything in that bed. They really, really like this garden bed, and I don’t know why!

Speaking of cats…

That tabby has all sorts of attention – including from a cat that ran off when I paused to see what was going on. The tabby had caught a bird, and the others were looking quite eager to steal its breakfast!

I’m seeing a lot fewer cats these days. This morning, I counted “only” 16 or 17 adult cats, and I may have double counted a couple

Once everything was taken care of outside, I headed to my mother’s early enough to stop for gas first. She was up and about, making herself breakfast when I got there. This included some of the instant oatmeal I’d bought for her a while back. I ended up sitting in an armchair, basically behind where she sits at her dining table in her very tiny apartment (my bedroom is probably bigger than her entire apartment), with just a half-wall between us. Mostly because I needed to close my eyes for a while, but I was also in pain, and needed the more comfortable chair. I didn’t take my T3s this morning, which can cause drowsiness and dizziness, since I was going to be driving, and just took some extra strength Tylenol. I was already tired, so taking a pain killer that could cause drowsiness didn’t seem like a good idea.

I was quickly reminded of something. My mother isn’t very good at following instructions.

I’ve shown her how to make the instant oatmeal, but she skipped over an important part. Letting it sit for about 5 minutes to absorb the liquid. She basically just started eating it right away, like it was some kind of soup.

My mother has never been a quiet eater. Now that she has had a tooth pulled, but refuses to have her dentures adjusted to fill the space, it’s gotten even worse. Thankfully, she was behind me and I couldn’t see what she was doing, because the sounds alone were making feel absolutely ill. I’m not normally bothered too much by stuff like that, but it was really bad today!

Thankfully, she was done rather quickly, and had a chance to chat about the upcoming call from her doctor. I knew it would be about the results of her blood tests, and she could ask related questions, but anything else would require a separate appointment. She started saying that she wanted the doctor to get her into a nursing home. I tried to explain to her that the doctor has already done as much as she could; she got the ball rolling, my mother got the Xrays and EKG readings they required, and then it goes to home care. I told her again about how the case coordinator and I went through all the panel questions again, to update information on how much more difficult things are getting for her. My mother thinks that a doctor can basically just order her into a nursing home, but it’s the home care department that makes the decisions but, even if she’s approved, if there’s no space, she basically has to wait until enough people die to free up beds, and even then, the spaces go to those are are considered in the worst condition. We’ve all explained this to her, many times by now. The problem isn’t that she doesn’t understand it. She simply refuses to accept it. I ended up telling her that this is because she’s doing it through the health care system. There are privately run nursing homes that she could go through, but she’d be paying a lot more (even through the system, nursing home residents are charged “rent”, based on their income, just like where she lives now). Then she started complaining that the home care worker wasn’t there yet, even though it was barely past 8am. I commented that she’d told me they come closer to 9am. Oh, sometimes they come at 8… they come at all times.

At which point I realized that the time the “usually come” is the time she notices it is, and that they should be there is when she wants them to be there. Nothing to do with schedules or having to go to other homes.

Which got her talking again about how there should only be the same two people coming to do her med assist, not so many. I told her again, this is how the system works. It’s how they have to do it. Otherwise, she would have to hire a private home care company and pay for it out of pocket.

Which actually caught her attention.

We didn’t get far into the conversation, though, as the phone rang.

It was the clinic, but the doctor’s assistant, not the doctor. We’ve spoken with him before.

I put it on speaker phone so my mother could hear, but the volume was a bit low, and the guy had a strong accent. My mother’s response was basically to start yelling at him to speak louder. I manage to get her to stop, tried to turn the volume up, and explain to the guy that she couldn’t hear him, all at the same time.

There wasn’t a lot for him to tell use. Her test results hover around the same ranges, with minimal fluctuation. My mother really seems to want to be diagnosed diabetic, though. She keeps asking about her blood sugars, which were on the high side of normal this time – barely. He basically just said, eat less carbs. It’s not an issue. Her kidney function was also fine, which is the monthly test she’s been doing since leaving the hospital, back in March.

Before the call ended, I asked if my mother had any questions, and the launched into saying, she wanted the doctor to put her into a nursing home.

*sigh*

We both responded with basically the same thing; the doctor can’t do anything about that. She’s done as much as she can.

After the call ended, I went over my notes with her and explained things. She’s understandably frustrated in that she couldn’t make out much of what he said, but that’s why I’m there for these calls. Then she said, “so… the doctor didn’t even want to talk to me…”

*sigh*

When it came to explaining about reducing carbs – and what carbs are – it got more difficult. My mother makes a big deal about how she avoids sugar, which she doesn’t really. As she understands it, it’s all about avoiding white table sugar, and “sweet things”. I tried to explain to her that bread is “sugar”. Pasta is “sugar”. etc. He’d said something about eating more vegetables that I brought up, and she perked up saying “and fruit!” I had to tell her, no, fruit is basically just sugar.

I finally started looking up lists of low carb vegetables for her, then wrote out the ones that she knows and likes, dropping off the ones she wouldn’t eat (partly because they were unfamiliar to her, or aren’t available locally, but also because she doesn’t know what a lot of them are) and those she shouldn’t eat, because of her acid reflux.

What the doctor doesn’t know when it comes to my mother’s diet is that she has stopped eating meat almost entirely, because she has decided it’s bad for her (the TV told her so…) and the bulk of her diet is bread and milk. So I looked up and made another list of low carb foods aside from the vegetables list.

She wanted me to write out a list of things she should NOT be eating, and I told her it would be too long. Instead, I looked up a list of high carb foods and read it out to her.

Not that is will make much difference. And really, at her age, there are far bigger things to be concerned about!

While talking about meats, though, she suddenly told me to take the whole chicken I’d bought with her groceries, take it home and cook it for ourselves. That chicken was pretty much the only meat she had.

After a few questions, it came down to, she couldn’t cook it. She doesn’t know how to use the oven on her stove, so she can’t just roast the whole thing, and she can’t physically stand to process and cook it on the stove top.

I offered to butcher it for her, which she agreed to.

I started off by clearing and preparing the space to work in, including doing a few dishes, then cleaning the sink itself to wash the chicken in. Of course, my mother started giving me step by step instructions on what I should be doing. She suggested using a stainless steal bowl I didn’t know she had, for washing the chicken. So that worked out – except I was apparently supposed to wash the bird after it was cut up, not before.

Then I discovered my mother does not have a proper knife.

She directed me to her one larger knife to use, and it was some sort of bread knife with different sizes of serration. I did try to use it, but it was just tearing the bird apart, so I looked around some more. She told me she had this really good knife that she got at the second hand store, and that turned out to be a cheap steak knife.

I ended up using a paring knife.

Apparently, I still wasn’t going it right, so my mother came over to the sink, got the water running – hot water! – and started tearing the chicken still in the bowl apart with her bare hands, splashing chicken juices everywhere. After tossing a chunk of tail and spine into a frying pan, she started saying that the wings are small, so they could be quickly cooked right away, and she then tried to tear the chicken apart more. I tried to tell her to sit down – the whole point of me doing this was because she couldn’t stand at the counter for fear of falling! – but she ignored me.

Thankfully, the home care worker for her morning med assist arrived just then!

I had to remind my mother to wash her hands of raw chicken, with soap, before getting her meds, and once she was with the home care worker and getting her medications, I was able to finish butchering the chicken.

That left me with a carcass I didn’t want to waste, so I found a small pot in her oven (she stores her pots and pans in the oven, since she never uses it) and got a stock going, using up some older vegetables I found in her fridge to clear out. I was a bit perplexed when I asked where her salt was, and found a small lidded bowl with salt that had dark flecks in it. It turns out that any take out packets of salt and pepper she found herself with, she would empty them into her salt bowl. So it was a mix of salt and pepper! I found some dry herbs and she directed me to her very last garlic clove, which was stored in a drawer with her larger knives, and spare envelopes.

…

My mother seemed surprised by what I was doing. I don’t think she’s ever made a chicken stock on its own before.

Once that was going, implements washed and the splashed raw chicken mess all cleaned up, I started frying up the pieces of chicken in batches. When those were done, I set them aside in a container to cool, then deglazed the pan and added that to the stock, which was getting close to done by then. I had enough time to clean up again, then take out her garbage, then clean up again…

When the stock was ready and I fished out the large pieces to remove any of the meat that was left on the bones (there was next to none), my mother gave me a hard time for throwing it out instead of taking it home to the cats. I reminded her that onions are bad for cats, but she said they’d be fine.

…

The stock got drained to a smaller pot and set aside with the cooked chicken to cool and everything got cleaned up again before I could finally sit down for a few minutes. My mother actually seemed eager to use the stock – even just to drink straight!

Which was the closest I got to seeing any sort of appreciation, really, but that’s fine. I don’t expect that from her. I could tell she was happy with it because she wasn’t giving me a hard time for doing everything wrong. 😄😂

Once everything was done, I finally got to sit and rest for a bit (my painkillers had worn off for some time by then!) and we got to chat. I mentioned that the store our post office is in closes at noon, so I’d have to leave in a bit, but I did still have some time to visit.

When it was time for me to do, she was looking at the clock and saying “it’s not noon yet!”

I actually had to explain to her that them closing at noon meant I had to be there BEFORE noon – and I had driving time to consider, too!

😄

It’s a good thing I did, too, as my daughter had a parcel to pick up. I also picked up a few packets of flower seeds, since it looks like none of the flowers we planted in the fall have survived the spring.

I still got home before noon!

It was all I could do not to go straight to bed!

Today has been a much more pleasant day outside – feeling almost cold, after the heat of the past two days. We’re apparently having rain and thunderstorms right now, too.

~ looks out the window at the clear sky ~

I don’t think I’ll be able to get anything done in the garden beds today, though. We’ll see what the evening brings. I’m just glad to be home.

The Re-Farmer