Again! but some good stuff, too (plus a bit of a rant)

First, the cuteness. I haven’t been able to take photos of the cats much lately, but I did get this adorable shot, yesterday.

Or was it the day before yesterday?

I’m losing track.

I was tending to the flexible hose for the emergency septic diverter, getting any liquid sitting in it, out, and the cats were very interested! Syndol, however, went for a post-eye view! 😁

This morning, I was just starting to feed the cats outside, when my cell phone started ringing.

*sigh*

There’s really just one place that calls my cell phone.

Home care.

Yup. They were short staffed again. This time for my mother’s morning meds.

Given what time it was, I quickly finished feeding the cats, grabbed my purse, then finished short rounds before heading to my mother’s. With what time she’s supposed to take her morning medications, I didn’t have time to change or call her ahead. So my mother got a bit of a surprise when I came in the door instead of home care this morning!

I wasn’t there for very long, but a lot happened in that short time. She has some confusion about her meds and that led to her making all sorts of assumptions and accusations. Then she commented on how the case coordinator we had a meeting with yesterday had said we’d soon be getting rid of the lock box. Very clearly, she said this, according to my mother.

Which is the opposite of what she actually said.

After answering her as best I could while doing her meds, I took her blood pressure. It is much better this early in the day than in the evening. She had already made herself some breakfast, but I was able to empty her commode for her. I offered to help her dress, but she was happy to stay in her warm and fluffy night gown today, as she doesn’t need to go anywhere. My sister will be coming by later, so she will be able to do more light housekeeping and laundry for her. Hopefully, she also found a hot water bottle and some Velcro shoes for my mother, too. Finding shoes that my mother can get her feet into is even harder than for me. She has massive bunions and bunionettes, so her feet are much, much wider at the ball of the foot, even compared to mine. My sister was also planning to bring some microwave dinners as well. Home care will be able to heat those up for Mom, if she wants them to.

As we were talking, my mother mentioned that our vandal and his wife had stopped to visit her not long after I’d left yesterday. !!! It seems they were on the way back from another chemo treatment. Apparently, he was so sick, he couldn’t sit down, but had to lie on the couch and, even while driving, has to lay the seat back.

If he’s that sick, he shouldn’t be visiting my mother.

But, he’s playing her like a lute, and it’s working. She feels so sorry for him, and started telling me how my brother and I shouldn’t be “afraid” of him, and that we should basically suck up to him because he’s sick. She heard the messages he’d managed to leave with my brother’s voice mail, and knows full well he claims we caused his cancer, among other far more vile things he said about me and my daughters. Unfortunately, she is easily swayed. I don’t know what he’s trying to get out of her (and I doubt his wife has any idea that he made those calls), but he’s certainly succeeding in getting her to feel sorry for him. I think my brother may need to keep an eye on her accounts to see if any checks made out for large amounts get cashed!

After I left, I decided to stop at the post office to pick up a couple of parcels. I have another that’s supposed to arrive tomorrow, and was going to pick them all up on my way home from getting the truck to the garage, but went ahead and got the two that were there today, anyhow. More on that later!

Once I got home and updated my family, I called up the case coordinator. She was actually in her office, so I was able to talk to her directly. I knew she would have heard the messages I’d left yesterday, but there was no need for her to follow up on those. I wanted her to know about how my mother had declared she had said the opposite of what she really said, about the lock box, and about my mother’s confusion with her bubble packs.

I also mentioned that our vandal had showed up yesterday. She is somewhat aware of that situation. We talked about how it would work out if my mother were in a nursing home. Particularly the one she wants to be in. I would hope that we’d be able to ban him from visiting her, but they don’t really have security. Their security is to keep nursing home patients from wandering off, not to keep people out. The only real way to keep him away would be if there were a court order, and we looked into that several years ago. My mother would have to go to court herself, which she physically can’t do. My brother, as PoA, could only do it on her behalf if a doctor declared my mother mentally incapable of doing it herself. That she is physically unable to doesn’t matter. Granted, her cognitive decline would make it difficult for her to do it, too, but she’s not far enough gone for the PoA to kick in, in that regard.

Either way, it’s disturbing that he keeps showing up at my mother’s, and that she lets him in. At least his wife is with him, so he’d be on better behaviour. Apparently, he’s so unwell, he can’t sit, and had to lie down. Even while in the vehicle, he has to have the seat back. Even the case coordinator wondered, if he’s that sick, why is he stopping to see my mother?

Once all that was done, I could finally make myself breakfast – brunch? Today is Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent. Once again, I am giving up sugar and simple carbs. Bread, pasta, rice, potatoes, that sort of thing. The first year I did that, it was not that difficult. Last year, it was oddly difficult. But then, it wouldn’t mean as much if it was easy.

I ended up making a creamy meat soup for breakfast, with bacon lardons, celery, mushrooms, ground beef, mushroom broth, cream, a can of mushroom soup and a handful of shredded cheese (cheddar and mozzarella). It turned out delicious!

That done, I finally got to opening the packages. One of them was the keyboard protector I originally bought for myself. March is a birthday month, though, and after talking to my younger daughter, I found that my older daughter would not want what I originally planned to get her. Knowing that she has the same issues with cats on her keyboard that I do – and her computer is how she makes a living – I decided this might make an acceptable gift, instead.

When I took it out of the box, I discovered some pleasant surprises!

This is what I got. (not an affiliate link) Just a basic acrylic piece in the large sise, that would fit over my ergonomic keyboard.

It was not the only thing in the box!

The cover itself came with self adhesive, no slip pads to protect the desk surface. There is also an optional back cover, with clear Alien Tape type stuff to attach it, if necessary.

Then there was the clear acrylic phone holder.

A colourful round mouse pad.

and… what the heck???

An odd looking stick and some brightly coloured fuzzy things???

The odd looking stick turned out to be a “fishing rod”, and the fuzzy things were the “lures”.

It was a cat toy, with two different fluffy “lures”.

I called my younger daughter down and asked her if she thought her sister would like it as her birthday gift. We knew she wouldn’t have much use for the phone holder, and the cat toy would, of course, be for the cats, but she said that yes, her sister would like the gift. So she took it upstairs to set up over her sister’s keyboard as a surprise.

Then she got the cat toy out and put it together with a highlight marker yellow lure, discovering that the rod was telescoping!

The cats went absolutely insane over it!

Unfortunately, one of them woke up my older daughter after parkouring off of her stomach to get to the other room and try and catch the lure!

So my older daughter now knows what she got for her birthday – and then promptly fell back asleep!

My younger daughter was able to get all the cats downstairs and played with them for some time. Only the three grandmas were completely uninterested, and stayed on my bed! Tin Whistle was the most insane with her leaping and twisting and flipping through the air. Amazingly, the cat that was almost as acrobatic was Tin Whistle was Cheddar! He’s such a big boy, I really did not expect that!

When she saw Tin Whistle actually starting to pant (cats should NOT pant!), she stopped and tucked it way into the bathroom, where the cats are not allowed, until next time.

I plan to get two more of these covers. One for my own keyboard and one for my younger daughter. While I did balk slightly at the cost, the extras that came with it more than made up for it! Only the optional back panel was included in the description.

I am getting quite the giggle out of this “Engrish” description of the large sized cover.

【large size】20”long x 7”Width x 4.7”high. 0.4” thick;- this is large enough to cover each of them with enough room for keyboard. It’s high enough allows boys with large palms to type without any hindrance. that you can use the keyboard easily. It’s thick so it can take the weight of you chonky adult cats easily. Compared with glass, the sturdy and drop-proof acrylic material makes it safer.

Boys with large palms!

You chonky adult cats!

Too funny.

On a completely different note, I’ve been chatting with the Cat Lady today. They’ve been in the US for the past while, combining a family holiday with her husband doing a presentation at a conference. It turns out he was offered a job and they are seriously considering moving. Or, more accurately, she would really like to move. He’s not too keen on moving. As someone who has moved so many times, I’d be more like her husband on this one! Plus, they’ve been in their house for less than 2 years. So why would she want to move?

Better weather (Florida).

Better healthcare (US in general)

No state income tax (her husband would get to keep 52% more of his income).

Better political leadership, both state and federal.

I can’t argue against any of those points. Especially right now, when our Liberal government has chosen a tariff war that will destroy our economy, rather than accepting the reasonable request of beefing up our border security, dealing with the fentanyl crisis and meeting our NATO obligations, all of which we should already be doing.

If you’re hearing about it in the news and the US is being painted as the “bad guy” in all this, and Canadians are all up in arms against Americans and boycotting, they are lying. We could easily have avoided a tariff war, but our governments, federal and most provincial, have decided to play a dick waving war. Most Canadians see that, but you won’t be hearing about them, in the media.

Like the quote, wrongly attributed to Sun Tzu, goes…

An evil enemy will burn his own nation to the ground… to rule over the ashes“.

That is what our own government has chosen to do. Burn our nation to the ground, but now they can blame Trump for it. Our own government is the “evil enemy”, not the US.

Honestly, it’s gotten to the point where, if it were an option, I’d be moving, too. That whole “51st state” thing? That might well be the only thing that can save Canada. Lord knows, we haven’t been able to save ourselves. As I write this, Trudeau is still our Prime Minister, having stated his intent to resign after a new Liberal leader and PM is chosen, in a few days.

In our system. we don’t vote for our Prime Minister in federal elections. We have 338 elections for our Members of Parliament. The party that has the most winning MPs wins the federal election, and that party’s leader becomes the PM. The PM is supposed to also be an MP. Technically, he or she could still be PM if they did not win in their own riding, but they would not be able to debate in Parliament. In the rare event that this happens, an MP that did win would volunteer to step down. The party leader would officially move to that riding and be the MP in their stead.

On announcing his intent to resign, our Prime Dictator got the Governor General (who is supposed to be a neutral representative of the crown, but is a partisan T2 appointee) to shut down parliament. This was to avoid a planned vote of non-confidence which would have passed and triggered an election. The act was blatantly unconstitutional, but then, most of what T2 and his Liberals have done for the past 10 years have been unconstitutional and often outright illegal, and they’ve been getting away with it.

With T2 (not to be confused with his father T1, who was the most hated PM in Canadian history until now) saying he will step down when a new party leader is selected, there is now a leadership race. They managed to get rid of the one person that was actually competent (a woman born in India, and if there’s one thing our “feminist” PM can’t stand, it’s a strong, ethnic woman), so there are 4 people running for leadership. The one that they are blatantly working to install is Carney, a guy that hasn’t lived in Canada for more than 10 years, holds 3 passports, has destroyed the UK economy and, it turns out, has been advising our Prime Dictator for the past 5 years. So he’s been busy destroying our economy, too. Of course, he isn’t an MP, but that doesn’t seem to matter. He’s actually worse than T2. If (when) he is installed, he would automatically become PM – though when asked directly, when he would resign, T2 said it would be up to whoever won the leadership race. So… he might not resign after all.

Carney, meanwhile, has already talked about using emergency measures in Canada. My prediction (please, God, let me be wrong) is that, once installed into office, he’ll pull a Zelensky. Invoke the war measures act (aka: the emergency act) and declare martial law (because, Trump), and ban any elections. They can keep parliament from resuming, but can push through that “internet safety” bill they were trying to force through before parliament was shut down. This bill, if passed into law, would literally allow for people to be arrested for thought crimes and pre-crimes. Basically, anything anyone says that the government does not approve of can lead to charges, but it would also allow people to press charges against each other essentially for hurt feelings. It would allow them to ban opposition parties, start arresting anyone who disagrees with them, and give them the power to control the media, including social media.

It blows my mind that Canada has fallen so far. Worse, there are so many people who actually cheer this on.

So… yeah. I can understand why so many people have been leaving Canada (a trend that has been going on for years) for greener pastures, like the US.

I would certainly be sad to see the Cat Lady and her family go, but if they are able to escape, more power to them!

Thankfully, we live in the boonies. Things would be much worse if we still lived in a city!

I also mentioned to the Cat Lady about my having to cover for home care so many times. She completely understood our situation. Her mother had gone through the same with her mother (the Cat Lady’s grandmother. She had to be there almost all day, every day, because there were so many cancellations and screwups.

Suddenly, our situation doesn’t seem to bad!

When I got the call this morning, I confirmed that this evening’s med assists were still on schedule, and was told yes. I’m still half expecting my cell phone to ring, and be told they suddenly don’t have staff again.

What a mess.

Still, we do what we have to do, right?

*sigh*

The Re-Farmer

A quick update

My brain is feeling fried, so not much to say this time.

While heading to my mother’s for the meeting with home care, I noticed the trip meter on the truck was already at almost 450km. It’s only March 4, and I reset it when I filled the tank at Costco on Feb. 28. Just over 100km of that was the trip home. The rest was the first three days of March.

If I keep getting so many calls to cover med assists like in the past couple of weeks, this is going to be a very expensive month on gas!

I got to my mother’s early, in case she needed help with getting dressed or anything like that. She was already dressed and ready. She and I are alike in one thing: if we have some sort of appointment, we can’t sleep the night before.

Yeah, I’m didn’t get much sleep last night, either.

We got to talking and my mother quickly launched into an attack on my brother. She started accusing him of keeping secrets from her again, and said a few strange things. One was how he “brags” about his technology (he doesn’t brag. Even the slightest attempt to talk about his work is so far beyond her ability to understand, he avoids talking about his job at all). Then she said, she doesn’t want his technology, but his kindness.

No one has been kinder to my mother than him. No one has done more for her than him. He has covered her butt for decades. But because he doesn’t tell her all his personal stuff, and doesn’t always agree with her, doesn’t allow her to treat him like her personal slave, that means he’s not kind to her – then she suddenly started saying that it’s his wife that controls everything. !!!!

There was one thing she said that actually confirmed something we’ve suspected for some time now. A matter of phrasing, really.

She is getting my brother mixed up with my dad.

He looks more and more like my dad as he gets older. My mother and my dad were always butting heads. A very dysfunctional relationship. We’ve noted that she’s treating my brother like she used to treat my dad. Today, she actually started talking about him as if he was my dad.

Then there was a knock at the door, and the case coordinator arrived.

We talked for while about all sorts of things. They’ve not been able to find exactly what happened with the morning no-shows. The best they could come up with is that there was confusion and lack of communication because a previous shift scheduler has been away for the past month, and there is come chaos with the people filling in for her.

I tested my mother’s BP so she could see how my mother has to move around when just shifting from chair to chair, so I could access her left arm. My mother and I had already decided that, at the end of the meeting, I would take her to do her blood work, so the case coordinator could observe how my mother gets into the truck, and moves around in general.

In the end, it looks like my mother will start getting some meal assists – all they can do is things like make her a sandwich, or reheat leftovers. My mother was indeed already scheduled for longer time in the mornings, for assistance in dressing and emptying her commode, but it hasn’t been happening, so that will be looked into. I don’t think my mother is in “bad” enough condition for her to actually get considered more urgently to get her into supportive living or long term care. Which is so very frustrating.

After the meeting was done, I got my mother to the lab in the local hospital with no doctors, just a few blocks from my mother’s place, for her blood work. Only one vial was needed, and no one else was there to get done, so it was really fast. Just that outing wore her out, though, and she was glad to be home. It was just coming up on lunch time, so I got some food together for her before I left.

And that was pretty much it. I had actually intended to go for a nap, I’m so tired, but after I had my own lunch, it just didn’t make sense to try and nap, or I’d screw up my own night. So I’m basically just dragging my butt through the day until it’s a reasonable hour to go to bed.

I need sleeeeeeepppp.

Thankfully, I don’t have any appointments tomorrow, so I should be able to have a recovery day. Unless I get another call from home care to cover my mother’s meds again! Then I have the appointment at the garage for the truck to do a whole bunch of relatively small things before they become big things, along with replacing the oil sensor. Which means a few hours in town, while it’s being worked on. I should have several parcels to pick up by then. Two are already in and waiting. One is something I finally broke down and ordered; a clear acrylic guard for my keyboard, to keep the cats from walking on it and digging under it! Ghosty in particular is truly dedicated to waiting until I’m in bed, then digging under my keyboard. She’s even knocked it right off my computer table at times! That and many is the time I’ve gone back to my computer and discovered all sorts of strange things have been opened, some of which I have no idea which keys got stepped on to find!

Anyhow.

Time to move on to things that don’t require much thought processing. Like laundry!

The Re-Farmer

Good, yet not good

Well, I’m back from going to my mom’s for her med assist. I’m glad I went, in one sense, and wishing I hadn’t had to in another.

It wasn’t just my mother.

After I’d called my mom to let her know I’d be coming over to do her evening med assist, I had time to get a few things done. It was absolutely gorgeous out today, with temperatures just above freezing. I fed the outside cats early and took the time to check on the flexible hose on the emergency septic diverter. The black plastic had warmed up enough that I was able to get quite a bit of the thawing ice chunks out. It wasn’t in any danger of getting blocked by ice, but I still wanted to get as much out as I could.

While I was outside, my mother called back and left a message, asking if I could pick up some milk and croissants along the way. Since my sister introduced her to croissants, not that long ago, it has become her favorite thing to have with tea!

Which just meant leaving a little bit earlier.

The first problem was actually at home. We’re all pretty unhappy about how often homecare hasn’t been able to do my mother’s med assist, just in the short time since she got out of the hospital. My siblings have expressed their dissatisfaction, but they have also expressed their gratitude that I’ve been able to take care of it. It would be a lot more difficult for them to do it! My husband, however… well, along with his physical disability, he also has military related PTSD. With him, it was more anger, and he started taking his frustrations out on me. Which I don’t put up with.

We are not a couple that has arguments, as others do. We don’t raise our voices at each other, or anything like that. But when we disagree on things, and my husband recognizes that he is starting to get a PTSD rage response, he has medications and coping techniques to deal with them, which is what he resorted to.

I’ll just leave it at that.

When I headed out, my first stop was at the grocery store to get the stuff for my mother and, since I was there, to pick up more of the deli meats for ourselves that this store has at better prices than anywhere else I’ve seen. Then I went to the gas station to top up the truck and pick up my mother’s favorite fried chicken and wedges. I wasn’t sure if my mother would have had her supper yet, but I wanted to make sure she had something available so she wasn’t taking her meds on an empty stomach.

I’m glad I did. It looks like she was just going to heat up a can of cream of mushroom soup for her supper, and was out of milk to make it with.

After putting away her things, we sat down for our supper.

My mother was just looking for things to rage at today.

The first was about my having to drive soooooo far, just to give her her pills. The doctor wouldn’t want that! I told her, the doctor doesn’t care. He just cares that she gets her medications. Then she raged that she should can take her medications herself. I side tracked that. She started saying that home care should just come once a day, and leave her medications for the rest of the day ready for her. I told her, they can’t do that. They have very strict regulations they have to follow these days. They can’t even take pills out of the bottles, but only out of bubble packs.

Oh, you’re always taking their side, she says.

Then it came up about my brother visiting her yesterday, after having gone to the farm, first. I mentioned I had been out and missed them entirely, and that he’d just gone to tend to their truck, as a way of saying he was at the farm for a very short time.

Which my mother latched onto. She’d forgotten that they’d sold their property and everything was at the farm now. We weren’t talking about it, because if she remembered, she would end up telling our vandal about it, and that’s the last thing we need.

Well, I won’t get into how it went with that, but she went into another rage against my brother and started to literally invent scenarios in her head about how he was “keeping secrets” from her, among other far less pleasant things. It took some doing to calm her down and distract her.

All before we even finished eating our meal.

Once we were done eating and got her table clear, I got her supper meds out for her to take, while I made notes for the next home care person to see, then prepared her before bed medications and puffer, before putting everything else back into the lock box. Then I got her blood pressure machine, which she had hidden away in a closet, and tested her.

After that, I started changing her garbage and doing some clean up, when she asked me to do her water bottles. She fills various bottles of water she uses for drinking and cooking from a tap in the laundry room that has softened water, and they were all empty. So I took care of that, then washed her dishes, before getting ready to head home.

As I was getting my jacket on, I reminded her again to take her last meds between 8 and 9pm, when she told me she’d already taken her puffer.

What? When???

It turns out that, while I was filling her water bottles, she decided to take her inhaler dose.

This is not the first time she tried to do this with me. During one of the past evenings I’d gotten her evening meds ready, she suddenly decided she should take her puffer dose right way. I stopped her and said to take it with her before-bed medications. This is supposed to help her with her breathing at night (I don’t think it’s actually making a difference, but it’s a trial). It’s not going to help her much if she takes it too early.

When I found out she’d taken it, I told her all the same things again. She seemed surprised by it. I have no idea why she gets it in her head to take it so early. She takes a puff twice a day. With her morning meds then, about 12 hours later, with her before bed meds.

Thankfully, doing this won’t harm her, but if she can’t be relied on to wait 3 hours before taking her before bed medication, I may have to stop getting them ready for her on nights like tonight, when home care is short staffed for both evening med assists. I will have to go home, then come back 3 or 4 hours later.

She’s already losing it over the fact that I’m coming at all. If I start having to come in twice in one evening, I don’t know how she would handle it. She certainly would think that her own actions have anything to do with it, but it does add another layer of concern.

Thankfully, we’ve got a meeting with the home care case coordinator in a couple of days. I should give her a call tomorrow, just to let her know about my mother’s behaviour, as it’s not something I could tell her about, with my mother there. As concerning as it is, perhaps this is one more thing that will get my mother into long term care, as she has been wanting for months now.

I didn’t stay too much longer after that. Thankfully, the days are longer now, so it was still light out during the drive home, and I could actually see the deer, well in advance!

Once home, my priority was to update my siblings – and apologize to my brother and his wife. My simple comment about him coming out to the farm and why set her off, and now she’s going to be even worse towards him because of it. My mother keeps saying how she loves all us siblings equally, but her actions belie her words. The twisted hatred she has developed towards my brother has been getting so much worse. It bothered me less when it was directed at me, the first couple of years we were living here, than it does now that it’s directed at my brother. No one has done more to help her and take care of things for her than he has, for so many years. He deserves so much better than this!

*sigh*

So, on the one hand, I’m really glad I ended up going to my mother’s, today, as she ended up needing help with other things as well.

On the other hand…

*sigh*

It is what it is, and there is little we can do about it but, my goodness, it shouldn’t be this way!

The Re-Farmer

Well, so much for that…

Today was supposed to be a home day. And it mostly was.

Then I got a phone call.

From home care.

They don’t have anyone do to my mother’s med assist for her two evening visits.

Which means I am going to soon be on my way to take care of that.

My mother came home from the hospital on Feb. 10. Today will be the 20th day since she’s been home and her meds set up with the lock box. In those 20 days, this evening will be the 4th time I’ve had to do a med assist due to short staffing. Technically, 7 times, since she has two evening visits, and I’ve had to prepare her before-bed pills, too. Plus, she has had two morning no-shows, where someone was scheduled to show up, didn’t, and they don’t know why.

It’s a good thing we’ve got a meeting already set up in a couple of days. I had no problem being the one for them to call if they are short staffed, but that was supposed to be a fairly rare occasion.

This is ridiculous.

The Re-Farmer

Home care follow up

Today, I took my daughter to the town north of us for a medical scan appointment she had. After that, we went to the livestock supply store to pick up four 40 pound bags of kibble for the outside cats. My daughter hadn’t been to this store before, so she got to spend some time looking around before we headed out.

I had just started the truck to head out when my cell phone rang. Talk about perfect timing!

It was the home care coordinator, following up on the messages I’d left. The last one I left, I told her I was going to be out, and to call my cell phone.

The first thing to talk about was the med assist visit that didn’t happen, two mornings ago. Under normal circumstances, if a home care worker didn’t fulfill a med assist, a note would have been sent electronically to the case coordinator, letting her know why.

She never received any such notice. They only thing they have is a record saying the visit was not fulfilled. My mother was home, awake and waiting for the home care worker, so it’s not like someone knocked at the door and there was no answer. In fact, if that did happen, they would have contacted me about it so that a wellness check could be done.

They are still investigating, to find out what happened. This is the second time this has happened since my mother got out of the hospital, so in only a couple of weeks!

The other thing to talk about was my mother’s extra bubble packs being on her fridge. I know that, when my brother got the larger lock box, all the bubble packs were put into it. He’d even commented on how well they fit. So why were the unopened packs taken out, with only the active pack inside the box? None of us know.

I told her about my own evening med assist visits after being called because they were short staffed. I explained I’d made notes of what I’d done to include in the lock box for their records. She asked if the bubble packs were all in the lock box again and I explained that I was going to do that, but my mother started to get very angry and demanded the inactive pack be put on the fridge, so I did, but made sure it was pushed back far enough that my mother couldn’t reach it herself. I talked to her about my mother saying these would be her “emergency” pills, if no one showed up again, and about what I found when I got her old packs to take to the pharmacy, and brought the loose pills in an organizer I’d found. I explained to her about how my mother had through the pharmacy had changed her prescription in one medication because it looked different, when the only thing that changed was the supplier for that medication.

We also talked about my mother now having a folding, indoor walker on loan from the Senior’s Centre, to use instead of her cane, because of her fears of falling. We talked about her increased memory issues, some of which my mother recognizes, some she doesn’t, and my mother’s own concerns about her finding it harder to communicate.

I did remember to mention that my mother needs an assist for her feet to trim her toe nails. That is something that home care should be able to arrange though the system. If not, my SIL found the name of someone local that does foot care, assessments, nail trims, etc. that we could call.

The coordinator was quite concerned about my mother’s memory issues, as that has gotten noticeably worse, and there is the increase concern for her safety due to reduced mobility. She wanted to talk to my mother directly. So we booked a time for next week at my mother’s, and I will be there.

Then, as my daughter and I were driving home, my phone rang again. Not a number we recognized, but I figured it was probably home care about being short staffed again. My daughter answered and put it on speaker phone.

It was the home care scheduler, letting me know that they did not have someone to do my mother’s med assist tomorrow morning.

🫤

So I will have to do that. She was scheduled for 8:55am, so I will make sure to show up around that time. I’m doing the Costco run tomorrow anyhow, so I can just leave earlier and stop at my mom’s along the way.

Once we got home, I phoned my mother to fill her in. When I told her about the appointment next week, which will be at 10:30am, the first thing she said was, why isn’t it in the afternoon?

*sigh*

I told her, because that’s the time the case coordinator had available!

While we will be talking about the missed visit, which is still being investigated, I told my mother the coordinator will be asking all sorts of things, so this is the time to talk about her worst days. None of this “oh, I’ll be fine, I can manage” stuff! She wants to be in a nursing home, so she can’t be making light of the issues she’s having!

Then I told her about tomorrow morning, and how I am going to the city anyhow, so it’s not problem for me to stop along the way.

Her response?

Can’t you tell them how far way you are?

I told her, they know where live. I am the closest. This is how it works. If they are short staffed, they call me.

Can’t I just do my own medicines?

No.

I didn’t even try to explain about doctor’s orders again.

Then she started to say, when she missed her medications, she felt fine, so it wasn’t a problem. Basically, implying that if they can’t come in for the med assist, she can just skip her medications and it’s fine.

I reminded her, most of her medications are preventative. They’re there to keep her from having a problem, so she isn’t going to notice anything if she missed them once here, and once there. But if it happens too often, then it can cause problems. One of her medications, for example, is for stroke prevention. If she doesn’t take that medication, she isn’t going to feel a difference – until she has a stroke!

To which my mother started saying, do you remember that oval yellow pill? The one for stroke? Do you remember that pill?

I told her, I don’t remember exactly which is which, but I do remember the yellow oval pill.

My mother then started saying, the pill is different now. It’s smaller.

I reminded her of the last time she had issues with this, when the pharmacy changed suppliers and the colour was slightly different.

Oh, the colour is the same now…

I told her, that wasn’t the point. The point is that not all suppliers have exactly the same appearance, but the medication would be the same. So it would be just as strong? she asked. Yes, it would be the same prescription. That has not changed.

I’ve been looking through her bubble packs in the last couple of evenings. Aside from one new pill and one changed dosage, neither of which are oval yellow pills, her pills look exactly the same as always.

When I once again confirmed that I would stop at her place on my way to the city, she started going on about how I go to the city sooo often.

I reminder her, I go to the city twice to stock up, at the end of the month, when pay comes in. That’s it.

We’ve had this exact conversation several times now. To her, it just seems like I go to the city all the time, because she isn’t noticing that an entire month has gone by since the last time we talked and I mentioned I was going into the city.

We got some more snow that started while my daughter was getting her scan done, and we’re supposed to get more, off and on, through the night. It should be done during the wee hours of the morning. Not heavy snow, but I’ll definitely have to be careful about slippery highways tomorrow. Our expected high of the day is supposed to happen around 7am, and then it’s supposed to keep dropping for the next 22-24 hours, when we’re supposed to reach an overnight low of -25C/-13F on Saturday morning. We’re supposed to go from that to a high of -10C/14F on Saturday, and keep warming up to a high of 1C/34F on Sunday! Monday is supposed to be 3C/37F! After that, the highs are supposed to drop to below freezing again, but not by much.

Just a few more weeks, and it’ll officially be spring. We might even have most of the snow melted away by then!

Won’t that be nice!

The Re-Farmer

Getting things done

The main thing on my schedule for today was to go to my mother’s and help with her grocery shopping, but of course, there was plenty of things that had to be worked around the time I would be gone.

Part of my morning routine is to top of the dry kibble for the inside cats, luring (or chasing) them out of my office/bedroom and closing the door, leaving only Butterscotch and our elderly Freya in the room. Freya doesn’t bother Butterscotch, ever, so that works out. Once the other cats are out, I keep them out long enough that she can use the litter box without getting harassed by some of the younger cats, eat and drink, and just de-stress for a while.

She seems to be getting use to the routine, and has started to go around more and more of the room, like she used to when she first was brought in from outside. Which means that every now and then, I’d come back into the room and I can’t find her in any of her usual spots.

Today, I found her up by the ceiling!

She hasn’t gone up there in ages! It used to be one of her favourite spots to take naps, but it’s a favourite spot for a lot of the cats. I didn’t dare move too close and startle her away, but I did manage to zoom in for a photo.

Clearly, she was not trusting me, even though I didn’t come any closer!

Once the inside cats were done, it was time to do the outside cats. While we still have lots of donated wet cat food, since it’s too cold to give any to the outside cats, we were getting low on dry kibble in the bin. I reached a level where it was a mix of regular store kibble and a particular brand of feed store kibble. It’s been a while since they had that kibble, so I thought they might be willing to eat it again, after changing things up, but nope. I can see by the trays that they are actually picking out the other brand of kibble, and leaving the feed store kibble behind!

Getting more kibble from the feed store got added to my to-do list – just not that brand!

Once the outside stuff was done, I had time to look up some things and found we had at least on package ready to pick up at the post office, so I would leave a bit earlier to do that first.

I also decided on a style of camp commode honeypot to use in place of the bucket we’re using as a honeypot right now. I ended up choosing this one (not an affiliate link). It was the tallest of the ones I was looking at, has the elongated opening, can handle a lot of weight and still be stable (at least, that’s one of the selling features), has a padded seat, and can be folded up to take less storage space.

Plus, it was on sale. Bonus!

It has already been shipped, and should get here in about a week. Our septic pump should be working again well before then – I hope!!! – so this will be for the next time we have septic or plumbing problems!

With the way things have gone since we’ve moved here, I’m resigned to having some sort of septic or plumbing problems pretty much every year.

Another thing on my to-do list was to call the home care case coordinator. After talking to my mother on the phone on Monday, and finding out that no one showed up for two of her med assists on Saturday, I had left a message with the case coordinator. Today is Friday, and I hadn’t heard back yet, so it was time to call.

The case coordinator was in her office, so I got to talk to her right away, rather than leave another message. When I told her why I was calling, she was right on top of it, and had been looking into it.

According to my mother, when the person who was supposed to show up on those two med assist visits on Saturday showed up for the Sunday med assists, she told my mother she didn’t go to her place because she thought my mother was still in the hospital.

The case coordinator had confirmed she had visited my mother on the Thursday previously, so clearly, she knew my mother was home. There was nothing on the files to say that she did not visit my mother on the Saturday, either.

If my mother had been in the hospital still, she would never have been on their list to visit at all, but she was. There is no reason for the home care aid to have not shown up at my mother’s on that day.

The incident has gone up to someone higher up on the authority chain, and we should be hearing from her soon.

Since I had her on the phone, we covered a few other things. I let her know about the monthly bloodwork requisition forms I got yesterday, and that these would be stored in the lock box, so the care aids will know there will be something extra in there that they don’t have to deal with, other than leave them there.

I also asked if there was any progress in getting my mother into supportive housing or long term care. When it comes to the paperwork part of things, the case coordinator I’d started this with, who now works in the town the hospital my mother was in, had done as much as could be done at their end. Her file is just working its way through the system. It’s just really hard to get someone into long term care from the community, rather than from a hospital.

She did, however, talk to me more about the things to look out for that could help the process out. Basically, anything that makes it unsafe for my mother to be at home, both physical and cognitive. Physically, my mother is very concerned about falling, because that wrecked knee of hers now sometimes gives out. Frustratingly, the fact that she hasn’t fallen, and has managed to catch herself, means that they consider her okay to be on her own. With cognitive issues, my mother isn’t one to wander off and not know where she was going. Even if she did tend to wander, she physically can’t go very far, so that’s almost a moot point. There is her memory failures, though. Something my mother is noticing herself and quite alarmed by. So far, though, they have not been the sort of memory failures that would endanger her. She couldn’t remember until I questioned her, what day the home care aid didn’t show up, for example. She wrote it down, which is good, but then she couldn’t remember where the paper she wrote it down on was. None of this is endangering. Forgetting the stove on would be an example of endangerment – but my mother is aware enough of her own increased forgetfulness that she is super careful about that and constantly checks to make sure the stove is off (she does not use the oven at all).

Still, she gave us more things to keep an eye on that could help get my mother into the long term care she wants to be in.

The call done, it wasn’t much longer before I had to start heading out. By the time I got to the post office, a second parcel had been processed, which was nice. If it hadn’t been, it would have had to wait until Monday.

From there, it was to my mother’s town, early enough to go to the feed store and get a 40 pound bag of kibble, in the brand that cats will eat. While there, I asked about my order for 4 pounds of lysine (they come in 2 pound containers). I’d ordered some a while ago – before we had run out – but it still wasn’t in, the last time I was there. I had asked for it to be ordered again. This would have been at least a couple of weeks ago.

I’ve been there often enough that the guy is starting to remember me, but he couldn’t remember anything about lysine. He looked my file up but couldn’t find any order made. He was going to order it for me again when I happened to see something tucked into the shelf on the other side of the reception area that looked about right.

Sure enough, there were two 2 pound containers of lysine there! They don’t carry it normally, he knew nothing about it, and never noticed tucked into the shelf until I spotted it.

I bought the lysine, and he cancelled the order he had started, since this will last us a few months. I’m glad I spotted it. We’ve been out for a while, and I’m starting to see more coughing among both the inside and outside cats.

That done, it was off to the gas station to top up a bit, and pick up my own lunch of fried chicken and wedges, as my mother was getting her Meals on Wheels today. From there, I could finally go to my mother’s – and was even earlier than I told he to expect me!

Which gave us a chance to chat and visit while we waited for her meal to arrive. I was able to go over the bloodwork requisition forms with her, and she was happy with the idea of putting them in the lock box for safekeeping. I also updated her on my conversation with the case coordinator.

When it came to keeping an eye on things with her, I made a point of saying (again, though I doubt she remembers) that if someone like a doctor or nurse asks how she is feeling, this is the time to tell them the worst of how she if feeling! Not to brush things off by saying, “I’m doing all right”. My entire family is horrible for this. We could be sitting there with blood gushing out of a wound, and if someone asked how we’re feeling, we’ll say we’re doing just fine! It has taken me so many years of effort to get out of that habit, and I still fight it at times, so I totally understand what my mother is doing, and why. My mother’s response was, nobody wants to hear the bad stuff. I told her, when it comes to the doctors, they NEED to hear the bad stuff!

I honestly don’t think she got it, but at least I tried!

Meanwhile…

As I was getting some things from the cupboard for her, I took a look to see how stocked her fridge was, and noticed a container of what looked like soup, that looked out of place. I had immediate suspicions.

As we were sitting and chatting some more, my mother suddenly started telling me that our vandal has not been doing well, that he’d had to go to the hospital for a second time after his surgery, and that he was scheduled for more chemo today. She knew so much, I asked if my sister had been telling her this, since my sister is sometimes still in contact with our vandal (we all used to be very close to him). My mother immediately started to look sheepish.

No, they (he and his wife) visited.

Yesterday.

*sigh*

There is just no use in telling my mother she needs to cut ties with him. You’d think all those years of horribly abusive messages he left on her machine would be enough, or all the things he “borrowed” from this property when it was empty, and never returned, to the point she asked us to move here, but nope. Apparently not.

They had left her the mystery container of soup I saw in her fridge. My suspicions were correct.

I didn’t bother saying anything, though. There was no point.

Then her meal arrived, and we had our lunches together. I had suggested we go through her shopping list before hand, but it turns out she hadn’t made one! That is a first. She had gotten into sorting through her papers yesterday – she has a terrible habit of keeping way too many things that should be thrown out – until 1am, and never got to doing her shopping list!

So after we finished eating, we worked on her list, and even had a recent flyer to check out some sale prices.

That done, I was soon at the store, and even took advantage of some of their sales to get stuff for ourselves. We are still avoiding dirtying dishes as much as possible until we can use our plumbing again, so I wanted to pick up more sandwich meats at the deli. There are a few cuts that they have at the best prices I’ve seen anywhere. When I got there, I saw that most of this group had actually gone up in price – but they were still well below even the sale prices I’ve seen elsewhere. One type didn’t go up in price at all. So I could basically get twice as much meat as what I got at the other store – at sale prices – and still paid less. There were a few other things at sale prices I was able to take advantage of, though this being close to the end of the month, the budget is pretty low.

The good thing is, our temperatures have warmed up enough that I could leave the bags of my own purchases in the box of the truck without using insulated bags, and not worry about things freezing for quite some time! In fact, as I write this, it’s past 7pm, and we are still at a lovely -13C/8F right now! Granted, the wind chill is -21C/-6F, but after getting hit with the polar vortexes, that isn’t too bad at all!

Which meant that I didn’t have to hurry off after putting away my mother’s groceries. I was able to do some light housekeeping for her before heading out.

Before leaving, I messaged home to ask one of my daughters to meet me at the garage to help carry things in, so I wouldn’t have to pull into the yard or make two trips. Since I was the one carrying the 40 pound bag of cat food, I went ahead and did their evening feeding and warm water top up, while my daughter put away the groceries.

I am absolutely convinced The Grink has not left the isolation shelter even once, since the ramp door was opened!

Then, since we have lysine again, I broke out the Bullet. The lysine powder is pretty granular, so I grind it to a fine powder that will stick to the kibble. The first couple of batches were ground with raw pumpkin seeds until I ran out of seeds. That jar went for the outside cats, as the pumpkin will help them combat worms, and I’m sure the smallest cats are small because they have worms. Putting something in their food is pretty much the only way we can treat them, since most of them are too feral to catch, even if we could afford to take them to a vet.

The inside cats got cat soup with lysine in it.

Of course, there were dishes to be done. Since the septic tank is full and can’t be drained until the pump is fixed, we can’t drain water down the sink. That means doing dishes in one basin, rinsing in another, then tossing the dirty water outside. We keep pots and bowls in all our sinks right now, so we can still run water before we fill a kettle, wash an item or two, wash our hands, brush our teeth or sponge bathe, then take the containers outside to dump out the dirty water.

Inconvenient, but not as inconvenient as not being able to use the toilet!

Hopefully, this will only be until Sunday, when my brother comes out. I’m really, really hoping the pump can just be fixed, and we won’t have to find somewhere to buy a new one. There’s only one place that I know of that carries the one brand that still makes these pumps, and I have never seen them in stock. The city locations don’t seem to ever have them in stock, which makes sense. City people aren’t on septic systems.

Well, it is what it is. We deal with the hand we’ve got!

What else can we do?

Today, at least, I’ve managed to get quite a few things done while also being able to help my mother out, which saves on multiple trips! Tomorrow, if all goes well, we’ll load up the truck and I’ll finally make a trip to the dump. We’re supposed to reach a high of -4C/25F tomorrow!

I am so looking forward to that!!

The Re-Farmer

Well, that took a lot longer!

Longer by a few hours!

My daughter and I planned to head out early for our appointments and errands. Before that happened, I’m happy to say the electric company showed up to replace the bulb in our yard light. It hasn’t been working right for quite a while. I’d submitted a repair request through their website, but the only way to do it was as a “report street light outage”. I never got a response, so I sent out another repair request about a week ago. This time, I included both versions of our physical address, neither of which exist on online maps, so I also included our section number. Which is what our electric bills use as our address already. Last time, the section number was the only address I’d given. I guess it worked, because today, they showed up!

The repair guys were just leaving when I headed out to warm up the truck, so I had a chance to talk to them. We now have an LED light, which should last longer, and should also be brighter. My daughter and I got home late enough today that it was actually on, confirming that it’s working again.

Yeah. It took that long before we got home!

We were on the road pretty early, which worked out well. Our first stop was at the clinic to get my medical files printed out so I could transfer them, but before that, I made sure to get the bloodwork requisition for my mother.

I spoke to the receptionist about my mother needing these every month, and that the doctor I’d talked to on the phone had said they could mail it.

Her eyes got a bit wide on that.

The frustrating thing is that they’re now allowed to fax the forms to the labs. I’d thought it was just some labs, but nope. None of the labs in our province are allowed to accept faxed forms.

It’s a government thing, it turns out. It basically comes down to them assuming everyone is able bodied and mobile, has access to transportation, and lives close to clinics and labs. If you’re someone like my mother, but don’t have family or friends who can help out, you’re SOL.

After confirming that my mother will be getting tested for the same thing every month, she came up with the idea of simply printing me more copies. I got 7 of them. My mother’s doctor likes to see her patients in person at least once every 6 months, and my mother hasn’t been in since last summer, so after my mother gets her first lab results in, I’ll see about getting her in to talk to the doctor about the results, follow up on various other things, and get her physical. Until then, the forms can stay in the lock box with her medications.

I was very happy that she could do that!

Then I got my own medical files printed out and paid for. After that, my daughter and headed out and parked near our new doctor’s clinic, where we could also walk over to a Subway for lunch. The plan was to have lunch, have our appointments, and hit the grocery store, without ever having to move the truck!

Which would have been very convenient. 😄

The first thing I noticed was a sign on the clinic doors stating that they were not taking any walk ins today. I hoped that would mean we would be seen on time.

We were not.

I dropped off my medical files while my daughter and I both checked in, roughly half an hour early for my daughter’s appointment, then we waited.

And waited.

Happily, my daughter through to bring her knitting along. She got quite a bit of progress on the cuff of the sock she’s working on!

By the time she was called in to an examination room, it was more than 40 minutes past her appointment time. Mine was supposed to be 15 minutes after hers, but I didn’t get called in for another 45 minutes – and my daughter wasn’t done her appointment yet!

While I was waiting, though, I remembered to ask about my medical files. I’d brought printouts, which would have been scanned into they system. What was going to happen to the paper copies?

It turns out they get put into a secure box for shredding.

I asked if I could get them back when they were done with them (I did just pay $35 for them!), only to find out they already were. The receptionist got the keys so she could get them our of the shredder bin for me! So I now have a physical copy of my files. It should be interesting to go through it all!

Once I got those, I kept waiting. Even after being called in, I was waiting long enough to get a message from my daughter telling me when she’d made her next appointment, in April.

My own appointment was pretty straightforward. I was following up on the new prescription pain killers. With the dose she gave me, I was to take one or two capsules, once a day. I told her, I’ve been taking 2 before bed, which have been helping get more pain free sleep, but it doesn’t help me any during the day. After confirming details on the medication, she updated my prescription. The dose per capsule has been doubled, so I can just take one instead of two, but I can also take them twice a day, if I feel the need.

That done, we talked about her now having my medical files, so my next appointment should be for a physical. Once we worked that out, when I left, I booked my next appointment on the same day as my daughter, so we can just make one trip again.

My daughter had gone ahead to the truck and sent me a message while I was updating my calendar. My husband had let her know that the pharmacy had called about her prescription, and wanted to know if she needed it filled right away. I told her to say yes, and that we could go straight there once I was done.

When I got to the truck, my daughter was talking to our pharmacy, so I quietly let her know I needed to talk to them, too. Once she was done arranging for her prescription to be done, she let them know I needed to talk to them, too.

I explained that my prescription had been modified, but they had not yet received the fax. I told them where we were driving in from to get my daughter’s prescription, which gave them an idea of how long we would be, and she said she would keep an eye out for the fax for my prescription.

Our plan to go the the grocery store we were parked next to went out the window, as we needed to get to the town our pharmacy is in before they closed. Part way there, my husband messaged my daughter to let us know the pharmacy had called him again, saying that my new prescription was received and being filled.

We got to the pharmacy in good time. We even had enough time for my daughter to pick up the melatonin the doctor recommended she start taking, and she reminded me to pick up some antihistamines. I don’t know what I’m allergic to, but I’ve been reacting to something almost every morning of late.

From there, we popped to a store across the street that had something my husband requested, and then we went to the grocery store for the stuff we intended to get after the doctor’s appointment. Mostly, food we could use to make meals with as little cooking and as few dirty dishes as possible, since Sunday will be the earliest my brother can come out to fix the septic pump – hopefully!

We’re going to be eating sandwiches a lot, over the next while!

From there, it was one last stop to get more gas in the tank, and we could finally head home, several hours later than we expected! As soon as we got home and the bags were brought in, I immediately left my daughter to put things away while I got a jug of warm water, then headed outside to feed the yard cats and top up their food bowls. It’s the latest they’ve been fed for quite a while. I usually make sure to feed them before it starts getting dark, as it gives them a chance to eat before and skunks or other critters show up.

From the smell of the sun room this morning, we did have a skunk visit last night!

While it made or a longer day than planned, I’m glad we were able to get everything done today, before things started to close. Tomorrow, I’m out again to help my mother with her shopping, and bring over those bloodwork requisition forms. If all goes well, on Saturday, we’ll be making a trip to the dump. Then, starting on Tuesday, things really start to get busy for us, first with taking the truck back to the garage to get some work done. Then we will have our stock up shopping and another medical appointment for my daughter.

Oh, she got another referral today. She remembered to bring up her ganglion. It has gotten so painful, she can hardly use her left hand. So she has been referred to a plastic surgeon to start the process for surgery. She was hoping to avoid it, but it’s gotten really bad. Hopefully, it won’t take very long to hear back. She’s been referred to an endocrinologist, at her last appointment. They are part of our medicare system, so I don’t expect to hear from them for a year or two. Plastic surgeons are private practices that also do medicare cases, so I would expect to hear from them much more quickly. It was certainly that way when I had my medically necessary reduction mammoplasty with a plastic surgeon.

We shall see how it works out.

All in all, though, I’d say it was a rather productive day! We don’t get a lot of those, this time of year. 😄

The Re-Farmer

One more day?

Another day, where I wish I had the life of our cats.

Well, maybe not Butterscotch. She is frequently a ball of stress and anxiety. Before getting the above photo, I had lured the cats out of my room by loudly topping up kibble bowls in the dining room. Once I got all the cats, except our elderly Freya, out of my room, I could close the door. This gives time for Butterscotch to emerge from her corner to eat, drink and use the litter box. Last night, Butterscotch was looking distressed while various cats were at her food and water bowls on my craft table (which I can’t use as a craft table anymore), so I got the girls to be noisy about topping up the kibble bowls. As soon as the other cats started making their way for the door, poor Butterscotch RAN for the one litter box, hidden under my computer table, that she will use.

This morning, after luring the other cats out of the room and closing the door, I tried getting a bit more sleep. I had a very rough night last night, with many interruptions of various kinds. Usually, Butterscotch sleeps on my pillow next to my head. Lately, she’s taken to sleeping on my waist and hip. When I woke up, she wasn’t in any of her usual spots. It was a while before I noticed a cat in The Box. Without the other cats around, she finally discovered it! There is something about this box – it’s just the right size and dimensions, I guess – that the cats love, so I just keep it on my bed, next to the super fluffy, sparkly cat bed that was donated to us.

I had to go feed the outside cats, so I opened the door to let the other cats in when I left. When I came back, a different cat was in the box. Butterscotch was nowhere to be seen. As I write this, I got confirmation that she was hiding under the armchair again. One of the other cats was peeking at her, and I could hear her hissing and snarling. That is her usual response towards the other cats, even if they are completely ignoring her. Unfortunately, some of them are aggressive towards her, even to the point of attacking her when she tries to use the litter box. I have no idea why these cats started to do this. It wasn’t like this when we first brought her in. Sure, she has always refused to leave my room, but she was at least using all the room and even sleeping in cuddle piles on my bed, or coming to me while I’m on my computer, asking for pets.

Still, the indoor life is loads better than what it used to be for this old grandma!

I delayed going outside until past 9 but, like yesterday, it still wasn’t warming up. We were at -31C/-24F, and the wind chill was at -41C/-42F Another morning where I just gave the outside cats their food and warm water, and that was it!

We are supposed to get daytime highs that are slightly warmer than yesterday and, as I write this shortly past 10:30am, we have reached -24C/-11F, with a wind chill of -34C/-29F At least, that’s what my phone app tells me. My desktop weather app tells me we are at -26C/-15F, with a “feels like” of -25C/-13F Our expected high of the day is -20C/-4F. We are still under an ongoing extreme cold warning. Looking at the weather map, the polar vortex is currently extending through the Canadian prairie provinces, all the way down to Texas.

I was going to take my husband into town for some bloodwork he needs to get done. I’d suggested going in the afternoon, when we reach our high of the day, but he suggested we go another day!

I had no problem accepting that suggestion, though I will have to go to the post office. I’ll go when they reopen in the afternoon, which is when we should be at our high of the day.

Tomorrow, however, we are supposed to start getting highs above -20C/-4f, and lows above -30C/-22F and continue to warm up. Meaning today should be the last really cold day of the winter. We’re even supposed to hover just above and below the freezing mark for most of the last week of February.

I’ll believe that, when I see it!

This coming Friday (today is Tuesday), we should have a high of -6C/21F, which is great, since I’m now scheduled to go to my mother’s to do her grocery shopping and errands.

Meanwhile, I’m still waiting to hear back from the home care case coordinator. I’d left a message last night, after talking to my mother and being told she missed two of her medication times because the home care aid never showed up – and when she showed up the next day, claimed she didn’t know my mother was back from the hospital. My mother also claims the aids all have trouble opening the lock box.

The problem is, we can’t trust my mother to be telling the truth. I have no doubt that, at least some of the time, she believes what she is saying, but she also has a history of simply lying outright. Finding out that she thought she was taking “hospital medication”, which turned out to mean her barely used bubble pack that she had with her in the hospital, and that she “remembers” me packing it in her bag when we brought her home, when I had already taken it to the pharmacy the day before, was both confusing and concerning. Confusing, because of how she phrased things. Concerning because what she remembers happening, did not happen and could not have happened.

Not that long ago, my mother’s blood pressure dosage had been changed. On picking up her newly updated bubble packs, the pharmacist gave instructions to set aside the active bubble pack with the old dose until I could bring it back to them, and they would use the pills in there in the next bubble packs, since only the BP prescription had changed. I made sure to tell my mother this, but I never found that old bubble pack. I thought I’d seen it and went to get it to take to the pharmacist the day before she was discharged from the hospital, but that turned out to be one with just her eye supplements. They had to do those separately until they got an official prescription that would allow them to put it with her regular bubble packs. I suspected, but now am confirmed that my mother never set aside that older bubble pack, and just used it up. The home care aids would not have known of any changes to her prescription and just given her what was there.

Meanwhile, her BP just kept going up and now she is on a completely different BP medication.

When I get to her place on Friday, I’ll have to remember to dig out her BP monitor that she keeps hidden in a closet, and test her. I already dug out her pulse oximeter, which I hope she has kept on the table with the lock box. Knowing my mother, she probably hid it back in the closet.

My mother gets very angry about that lock box and not being able to access her medications, but the more I discover things that she’s been doing, the happier I am that we have it! I wish we’d thought of it, long ago, when we first discovered she was messing with her medications.

Well, we do what we can. As alarming as some of this is, I’m hoping that the stuff she is doing will flag her file as more urgent for getting her into supportive living, or even long term care, which is what I think she really needs. She may be physically “too healthy” for a nursing home, but with her cognitive changes, I think she may be more than supportive living can provide. Plus, she actually wants to be in a nursing home and, at 93 years old, I think she’s earned that!

Funny how her own doctor – the one she doesn’t like because she’s black, female and has a strong accent – is the only one that immediately accepted my mother saying she’s ready for a nursing home. Home care and other doctors she’s seen have all basically said she’s too healthy and too mobile for it. I understand that there is limited space and the nursing homes tend to be for the worse cases, but a person shouldn’t have to fall and break a hip, or be at death’s door, before they can get the care they need!

But I digress.

Once this current polar vortex finally breaks, things will be easier for my mother, too. She’s feeling so much better after her time in the hospital – and even sounds better on the phone – she might even be up to crossing the street to go to church, again!

This has not been a very severe winter. In fact, it has been pretty mild, overall. In a way, I think that has made these cold snaps even harder to deal with than if it was just a cold winter, overall.

That and I’m just getting too old for this s***!

😄😂😄

The Re-Farmer

Home

First, the cuteness!

Here we have David the Magnificent, formally known as F****d Up Dave, due to the eye problems he had that led to him being brought indoors. He is snuggling with Ghosty, curled up in his belly and using Mitsy. At least I think that’s Mitsy. Mitsy is using Clarence as a pillow.

Partially visible behind David is Tiny, The Beast, next to a small carboard box that is a favourite bed for many of the cats. Beside David’s head you can see part of Peanut Butter Cup.

What a bunch!

I didn’t get any pictures of the outside cats this morning. I headed out earlier than usual – it was just starting to get light – to tend to the outside cats and do my morning rounds. Once those were done, I messaged with my SIL, then headed out to my mother’s town to meet her. We were early enough that when we drove to the pharmacy, we had to wait a few minutes for the doors to open.

I was afraid I would be too early, but my mother’s updated bubble packs were ready and waiting. Once we saw the packs, we knew without a doubt that they would never fit into the lock box! Especially not 4 week’s worth.

From there, we head to the the hospital in the town nearer to our place. When we got there, we found my mother was all dressed and ready. We gathered up her stuff, including a lovely orchid and succulent pairing she got as a gift. My SIL took everything to her car and was going to move it closer to the doors, while I went to the nurse’s desk.

One of the staff came back to my mother’s room with me and we went over the paperwork. One page was ensuring that my mother’s stuff was accounted for, including that I’d already taken her old bubble packs, earlier. We went over her prescriptions list that was faxed to the pharmacy, with special attention to the new or changed medications. There were notes about my mother needing to have monthly follow ups with her doctor to monitor her kidney function, now that she’s back on water pills, and with the person in home care to keep in touch, in regards to supportive living.

This was all stuff for us to keep. Normally, it would go to my mother’s but she isn’t able to read or understand most of it. I took them home with me, and made sure to get photos of each page to send to my brother, just like I got a photo of the medication list in my mother’s bubble packs and sent it to him, after we picked them up. This way, we will all have at least digital copies of everything.

Once going over the paperwork was done, it was time to head out. We took it slow, and my mother had to stop to rest a few times. When we got to the lobby near the doors and gift shop, she stopped to rest longer in one of the comfortable arm chairs.

My mother says she is feeling a lot better now, which tells me she was feeling really bad the day she went into emergency! The last time I saw her, after doing some grocery shopping for her, she was not having as hard a time as she was, just today, after 2 weeks of hospital care!

She did have an easier time getting into the car than when I last drove her somewhere, while using my brother and SIL’s other car. She needed a stool to get in, that time. I’d brought it along today, just in case, but she was able to manage without it.

From there, it was straight to her apartment. The spot I usually park at, by a sidewalk to a door closer to her apartment, was blocked by a fire inspection vehicle, so we had to stop at the loading zone near the main doors. I had found a notification under her door during one of the times I checked on her place, about the annual fire and safety inspection. The date range was from the 6th and the 10th, but I had no way of knowing if they’d done her building yet. Seeing the truck, it seemed we got my mother home, just in time to miss it!

I went with my mother into the building while my SIL moved the car out of the loading zone, so she could bring everything in after parking. Some of my mother’s neighbours were in the common room, and they were quite happy to see my mother coming home. My mother also got introduced to the new building manager. After confirming which apartment was hers, he said they had just finished doing the inspection there. I don’t think she quite heard him, though, which is good, because she would have gotten quite angry. She is still convinced the exterminator guy stole a jar of change and dug through her boxes of papers to steal 80 year old passports. She now thinks anyone that goes into her apartment – whether it’s the exterminator, or safety inspectors, or any other official entrance – is there to go through her stuff and steal things.

After a brief conversation, we continued to her apartment, and my SIL caught up to us soon after.

Once my mother was settled comfortably into her chair, we went through some stuff with her. She wondered what the lock box was and we explained it, but my SIL took it with her. They should be able to return it. The new, larger one will arrive in a couple of days. So my mother’s medications will not be locked up until then. They’ve been left in the pharmacy bag and my mother is under strict instructions to leave them, and only home care can touch them.

Oh! I almost forgot.

While I was walking around the yard, doing my rounds this morning, I got a phone call. (It seems my “new” phone is much, much better and getting phone signals than my old phone!)

It was home care, letting me know that they did not have someone available for my mother’s morning medical assist today.

I said, that’s good, because she’s still in the hospital.

I did confirm that she would be getting her usual visits for her evening and before bed pills.

While it worked out today, I’m rather displeased. This was her first day back on home care visits, and they were already calling me about not having anyone to do a it! Her morning assist now included getting dressed and emptying her commode, too, not just her med assist.

This is a real potential problem. I live the closest, but it still takes me about a half hour to get to my mother’s, if I am able to leave right away. If we have a situation like a few weeks back, where all home care is cancelled because of a storm, it would be too dangerous for me to do the drive. Since my mother’s medications will now have to be in a lock box, she can’t even take them herself (which she shouldn’t be, due to her habit of messing with her prescriptions). It’s not like we live in the same town and I’m just blocks away!

My SIL and I were talking about this while waiting for the pharmacy to open, and agree that this could become a real issue. They’ve called me quite a few times since she’s been on med assist, letting me know that no one could make it.

We’ll do the best we can to manage things, but it’s just one more thing to stress how badly we need to get my mother into supportive living!

I went through the cupboards and fridge to show her what what my brother and SIL had picked up for her, and where they were. She asked about Meals on Wheels, as they would normally come on Mondays. I told her they would not be coming today, as I didn’t know what time we’d be getting her home, so I would be calling them later to get it started for Wednesday.

My mother told us she hadn’t had her lunch yet (which we knew, since discharge time is an hour before lunches are served at the hospital), and we assured her, we would take care of that.

Once we got everything worked out and organized, my SIL gathered up the lock box and I went out with her to her car, transferring stuff to my own vehicle that I would be taking home, before we said our good byes.

That done, I went back inside and made a lunch for my mother. Once that was ready and she was starting to eat, I said my good byes and headed home. I had lots of phone calls to make!

The home care coordinator is now aware of the situation with the lock box. I’d already called her this morning to give them the combination. The new one will have the same combination.

I had to call the clinic at the hospital near my mother’s place. She was wanting to change doctors to the local clinic, and seemed to think that the nurse practitioner that saw her was now her primary caregiver.

He isn’t.

In fact, while talking to the receptionist, she told me there’s even a note saying that he can’t see her as a patient, because she already has a family doctor.

The one my mother doesn’t want to see, because she’s female, black and has a strong accent.

So I had to call the clinic in the town that’s about half way between my mother’s town and the city. I explained things to the receptionist there a bit, and suggested a telephone appointment with my mother’s doctor might be more efficient. She agreed. I now have a phone appointment for this Friday. Her doctor should have all the files, notes and test results sent to her by now, but she wouldn’t have any reason to look at them, yet.

The receptionist I spoke to also does home care, privately, so when I mentioned my concerns about getting my mother to monthly appointments, and that I wasn’t happy she was sent home from the hospital, she totally understood. There are so few supportive living places, and they all have long waiting lists.

While I was at it, I asked about getting my own files transferred. I had the same doctor as my mother, as an interim doctor, after our regular doctor moved to another clinic. Now that the doctor my daughter is seeing has accepted me as a new patient, I have to get my files transferred.

I can show up at the clinic at any time they’re open, with $35 cash or check. They’ll print out my files, and I would deliver them to my new doctor’s clinic myself.

This province’s system is so antiquated.

Once I was done with that call, I called my new doctor’s clinic. I need to talk to her about my prescription pain killers. After explaining things to the receptionist, she was able to book me in right after my daughter’s appointment, next week. The appointments are in the afternoon, so if we leave early, we can go to my old clinic, get my files, then take them to the new clinic before our appointments.

After I was done all the phone calls, I updated my siblings, and then called my mother to update her. I had to explain about her doctor situation. She wasn’t happy. In her mind, the doctor that is at the clinic in the hospital next to her place should take her as a patient, just because she wants him to – even though she claims that “everyone” doesn’t like this doctor. They should get rid of that doctor and get a new one. She doesn’t understand that there’s only so many patients a doctor can take on, and that if they got rid of this one, a new doctor would just be taking on the other doctor’s patients, not taking in new ones. That clinic needs more doctors, and there just aren’t any. All the rural clinics need more doctors, but even among the doctors we have, few want to live and work in the boonies.

What I’m hoping is that, since my mother needs to have bloodwork done to monitor her kidney function every month, her doctor can send her a requisition and my mother can get it done in the lab, locally. She’d still need to make the trip to see the doctor in person, but hopefully not every month!

Hopefully, this won’t be for very long, and a space for supportive living will be found. We’ve already stressed with my mother to take any space that comes up, even if it’s in one of the towns she doesn’t want to live in. She just needs to get into the system as soon as possible. Once she’s in, it will be easier to get her transferred to where she would prefer – though where she would prefer is long term care, not supportive living!

It’s not very often they have someone who actually wants to be in a nursing home!

Well, it is what it is.

For now, my mother is home. We just need to go from there!

The Re-Farmer

Getting things ready

Today, I wanted to make sure the morning rounds were done in good time. The outside kitties were happy to get their breakfast; I think I counted 30 this morning.

The down side was…

Slick is in heat.

Slick is the tabby in the above photo. Aka: Octomom. She had a litter of 8, a couple of years ago. Two of them, Soot Sprite and Tiny (The Beast), we have indoors, and the Cat Lady has The Wolfman. Slick is one of the more feral cats The white and grey in the photo is fixed; you can just make out where his collar is. He was just checking out what the fuss was! The black and white is Hypotenose. We could only get two males done at one trip, and Stinky – the grey and white – is one of the dudes we were able to get into a carrier that time.

*sigh*

This is so, so early for them to go into heat. I’d hope to be able to start trapping them before that would happen. We have no way to monitor a trap, so we have to wait until it’s warmer.

Crud.

Hopefully, next month, we’ll be able to bring more ladies in to the vet. The rescue has been able to help us with two at a time – we are not the only ones they are helping with spays and neuters, and donations are still slim.

Well, we do the best we can.

Once the morning rounds were done, I was able to heat out early to my mother’s apartment. The plan was to meet my brother and SIL there this afternoon, but I remembered that the pharmacy in her town opens at noon on Sundays. I hoped to be able to bring in my mother’s old bubble packs and, if all went well, bring her new ones home. If it was going to be today, I would expect them to need at least an hour to get it done.

So I timed things to I would arrive at my mother just before the pharmacy would open. I had her bubble pack that she brought with her to the hospital, plus there was an almost empty one in the home care folder. There should have been a partial one in her cupboard that she was supposed to set aside when one of her doses was changed. I was already supposed to take that to the pharmacy, so they could repack the ones that did not get changed.

I never found that one. I think she used it up, anyhow. I’m not sure the home care aids would have known they were supposed to go straight to the new refills. I did find another partial bubble pack with a supplement for her eyes that had to be packed separately until the pharmacy got an official prescription for it, so I grabbed that.

Then I noticed a weekly pill case and checked it out.

Oh, dear.

THIS is why my mother is on med assist.

And why her medications will be going into a lock box.

I think I know what happened – or at least part of what happened.

Some time ago, the pharmacy had to change suppliers for one of her medications. The pill was a slightly different shade of the same colour. My mother decided that meant the pharmacy had changed her prescription. She stopped taking it for a while before we found out. The same thing happened with the split pill. For the longest time, they would split a particular pill for her, but they were eventually able to get it in the exact dose she needed, so they no longer had to split a pill. My mother thought that meant she was getting a higher dose.

When we found out she was taking her pills out of her bubble packs and picking and choosing which ones to take, because she thought her prescriptions had been changed by the pharmacy, we were eventually able to get her on med assist. Given just how many pills are in these containers, though, I am now wondering just how far back these go, or if she is still doing it. She complains that the home care aids don’t come to her place at the right times (meaning, when she is up and having her meals), so she’s been taking them before they arrive. She’s also been telling them not to come in the evenings and just set her before bed pills aside for her to take when she is ready, because she “doesn’t want to bother them”.

Well, that’s not going to be an option anymore.

More on that later.

I grabbed the containers of loose pills and brought them along, too.

When I got there, I was able to talk to the head pharmacist, who was the only person working the pharmacy today. I first confirmed that they got my mother’s updated prescriptions, which they did. He brought over several pages to go over with me! Most have stayed the same, so there wasn’t much to talk about with those, but he had two prescriptions for inhalers. Thankfully, I’d seen the inhaler the hospital had given her to use. He had two types, and she had a prescription for both. One, she’d gotten while she was at home, but hadn’t used it for quite some time before one of the home care aids was able to explain to her how to use it. The hospital doesn’t use that type, so they prescribed the type they did use.

We decided to go with the hospital one, as it will be easier for her to take. Whether or not she should even be on it anymore is questionable, since it turned out she had pulmonary edema, not asthma.

Something to talk about another time. She has only 4 weeks prescribed. I will have to get her to her primary caregiver (since she went ahead and tried to change doctors) soon, and she will have to have monthly appointments.

During the doctor’s visit, that came up. It seems there was an “administrative error” when her kidney function started to fail, then recovered so quickly after she was taken off the water pills. She should have been seeing a doctor monthly after that, to monitor he condition.

No one told us that.

It’s been about a year since she went through all this!

So that’s going to be one of my regular tasks, now. Getting my mother to the clinic every month to monitor her condition. Which is going to be really hard on her, physically! She isn’t even making it to church, across the street, but now she’s going to have to climb in and out of my truck, then walk to and from the clinic, labs, etc.?

I really hope they find a space for her in supportive living soon, because this is just too much for her!

Anyhow.

The new bubble packs will not be ready until tomorrow, so we will have to take care of getting them then.

Since I’d come out so early, I was planning to have lunch before meeting with my brother and SIL at Mom’s place. They were getting things done early, too, though, and we ended up arranging to meet at the Chinese restaurant for lunch, instead. They still had quite a bit of driving to do, though, so it was going to be some time before they arrived. Which was fine. I just took my time eating. This place is very generous in their portions, so it was going to take a while, anyhow!

The joys of going to a family restaurant. I ordered at the counter and included some won ton soup in my order. When it was ready, it was brought to my table by the most adorable child. I think she might have been 9 or 10 years old. She was so very careful carrying the bowl!

She was also our waitress! When my brother and SIL arrived, she was the one who came to take their orders, brought them to the table, etc. She did a fantastic job!

I’m glad we were able to have lunch together, as it gave us a chance to talk, catch up on things and co-ordinate what we’d be doing next.

That made getting things done at my mother’s place much more efficient, though it did still take us about an hour to get her apartment ready. They brought the lock box they’d ordered, but I’m not sure the bubble packs will fit in it. It they do, it will be by millimeters!

We cleared out most of what was in my mother’s fridge. There wasn’t much there, and it was more about getting rid of things that were stale, or just not really fresh, and replacing it with what they picked up at the grocery store in the city earlier. Some things, I took home for the outside critters.

Among the things they got for my mother were some heat and eat soups that we hope Mom can open more easily; some in cans, some in single serving cartons.

I’m sure my mother will find reasons to complain about them or refuse to eat them, because they are “different”, and not what she’s used to. Still, I hope we can convince her to at least try them!

The lock box is set up and ready for her bubble packs – if they fit – and we’ll have to make sure home care has the combination. They’ve ordered a slightly larger one, so if it’s too small, it can be soon replaced. When I call to give them the combination for my mother’s file, I’ll have to make sure to let the case coordinator know that, if home care can’t make it for some reason, it takes me about half an hour to get to my mother’s place, if I leave right away.

Before we parted ways, we changed tomorrow’s plan slightly. Instead of my SIL picking me up at home, then driving me back after we drop off my mother, I will meet her at my mother’s place. I’ll leave my truck there as we go together to get my mother, then I can drive myself home. That will save her about an hour of extra driving!

The main thing is, my mother’s place is ready for her. Everything is cleaned up and sorted and arranged, and she has enough groceries for a while. My SIL even baked her cookies that she can share if she has a neighbour over for tea – if we don’t make it clear that’s why she has them, she will complain about how she isn’t supposed to eat sweet things (even though she does anyway).

When we bring her home tomorrow, I’ll have to make sure to show her where I put some of the non-perishables and, with the single serving carton soups, explain to her what they are. I know she’ll have difficulty seeing and reading the labels.

We still don’t know about the Life Line she will be getting, as that is arranged by the home care department, even though this is an outside service my mother will have to pay for. My brother and SIL are pretty sure my mother will find the Life Line overwhelming. I don’t know enough about it to say, one way or the other, but apparently my SIL’s late mother had it and was overwhelmed by it, and she did not have any sort of cognitive issues.

We shall see.

I know my mother will be glad to get out of the hospital, even though she quite enjoyed being taken care of and having meals delivered to her, etc. I think she is starting to get quite bored! At the same time, none of us are happy that she’s being sent home, when she really needs to be in supportive living, at the very least.

Well, we deal with the hand we’ve been dealt with.

What else can we do?

The Re-Farmer