It was white knuckle time at the end, but we did it.
My mother’s apartment is now completely empty.
At our end, things started after my brother got here and started working on their truck. Which he had to dig his way to. After clearing the barn door enough to open it to access their shovels, etc. He was able to plug in the block heater and left it to warm up before getting their snow blower out.
When I saw he was here, I went out and checked on the truck. It started fine and, at first, that oil pressure gauge was actually in the normal range, which was encouraging. After backing it out a bit, I found a single drop of fresh oil under the truck and that was it. Oil levels were fine. Yay!
Then I caught up with my brother and we worked things out. He would continue with the snow blowing and getting their truck ready, and I would go to my mother’s apartment, where my SIL was already at work packing.
There were a few little delays as he remembered to load up a cart to help carry things to the truck, and so on. In that time, I noticed…
The needle on the oil pressure gauge was dropping again.
*sigh*
It dropped to the same level it was at when I drove the truck home yesterday, then didn’t move. Not that I could focus on it much during the drive in. While today’s temperature was a lot warmer, the wind was insane. It wasn’t even snowing yet, but there was so much blowing snow on the highway that I was hitting white outs, even without snow kicked up by oncoming traffic. Once I was parked, I took a picture of the oil pressure gauge and texted it to our mechanic, as described how things had gone. Then I headed inside.
My SIL had been very busy. We were all shocked by how much was left. My sister didn’t take everything she was supposed to. I think she misunderstood and thought she was to take the things she wanted to keep, plus the stuff my mother specifically wanted her to take, not help empty the place.
There were boxes packed and ready, though, so I immediately started loading up the truck. It wasn’t long before I had as much as I could fit, so I headed back home, messaging my daughters before I left, so they would be prepared to assembly line things into the basement.
I also got a response from the garage. He found what was going on very strange. He said it could be two things: a problem with the engine, or the sensor – and the engine checked out fine when he was working on it yesterday. Which means, it is the sensor. Yet another common issue with our make and model of truck.
Definitely not going with GM again in the future.
I asked him if the sensor was still on warranty – it was replaced maybe a year ago – but whether it is or not, I asked how soon I could bring it in to be fixed. He will check on Monday and get back to me.
So, basically the truck is fine. Which is good, because I did a lot of driving today!
When I got home, I found my brother had gotten the snow blowing done, including clearing a path to the storage house that they could back their truck up to, when it was time to do the furniture.
The boxes, however, were going into the house. I unloaded the truck to the door, one daughter grabbed whatever I had, then passed it to her sister at the basement stairs. This was rather awkward because of how the doors are, and the need to make sure they got closed before any cats made a run for it.
Sir Robin did manage to get into the house once!
My poor brother, meanwhile, was having plenty of trouble. Aside from the huge job of snow blowing vehicle-with paths to their trailer and the warehouse they are beside, just in case we needed to put stuff in there – the truck was having issues. In spite of having a solar powered trickle charger all this time, the battery was dead. He had to boost it (thankfully, he has a booster pack) and had gotten it started by the time I unloaded, then went to talk to him before heading back. He was trying to drive it out, but there wasn’t enough turning radius cleared in the snow for a truck the length of his. He ended up having to dig it out manually.
After connecting with him, I headed back to my SIL. This time, loading the truck was more awkward. I needed to get the commode in, as the medical device department of home care will be picking it up from our place some time next week. It was too tall to fit under the box cover, but I managed to get it into the back of the cab, by setting it on one end. There were more boxes to put into the box, but most of what I had to get in was odd shaped stuff, including a large framed picture that my sister had left behind. I was able to get some smaller pieces of furniture in, at least.
The truck was packed about as much as I could when my brother arrived. Neither of them had eaten since breakfast, and it was well past lunch time, so we took a break for food. My brother, out of habit, shut his engine off when he meant to leave it running, and it wouldn’t start again! Thankfully, he brought his booster pack along, just in case, so he was able to get it going again. He did leave it running the entire time we were at the restaurant, and we even sat at a table where he could keep an eye on it, through the window!
We had an excellent lunch.
Since my truck was already loaded, once we were done, I headed home to unload while they went back to the apartment to start loading some furniture. This time, I was going to stay at home until they got there. The winds were still insane, though at least this time, it was at my back, so the drive was at least a bit smoother! It was still pretty hard to see the road at times – yet I still had vehicles passing me!
It wasn’t too much longer before they arrived with the first load of furniture. By this time, it was getting quite dark, and they were unloading into the storage house, which has no power. I brought out a camping lantern we now have – thanks, M! It sure came in handy! – and my brother found a place to hang it in one room, while a second large flashlight we have was used to light up the room we had to go through at the door.
My brother pretty much picked up and carried all the different pieces of furniture in, himself! He’s amazing!
Once that was done, we headed back to the apartment one last time. I was following them, but was soon left behind. The weather had gotten worse, and it was white knuckle driving quite a few times! It was bad enough that, when I got there, I brought up the idea of renting a motel room and spending the night, once everything was packed. They were going to do that drive, though. If I’d been on my own, I would have stayed in town overnight, but I was willing to do the drive, at the same time as them.
With the cap on their truck, they could fit everything left except for the mattress and box spring, both of which will be taken to the dump. That went into my truck. Unfortunately, I have a shorter box on my truck. A whole 2 inches shorter than the mattress and box spring! I do keep rachet straps in the truck now, though, so I was able to strap them down and leave the tailgate open.
After that was loaded, we went back in for one last check in everything, while my SIL took pictures and video of the empty apartment. Then, we locked it up one last time and headed out!
The road conditions were even worse. The only saving grace was that we had the wind at our backs, so the snow kicked up by oncoming traffic wasn’t quite as bad. They followed me this time, and managed to stay in view the whole way, even when we had people passing both of us at the same time! I just don’t get it. The road was barely visible, and a few times I found I had wandered into the other lane, because the road had disappeared under the swirling snow, and people were passing in this? Good grief.
Once back here, I parked the truck in the garage, since it wasn’t going to be unload this time. We got my brother’s truck unloaded – this time, he carried an entire loveseat, up the stairs and into the storage house! I was able to help with that one a tiny bit, at least.
That storage house is so jammed with stuff. We haven’t gone in there all year, and have made no effort to trying and clear it out. So much in there just needs to go to the dump! Now, we have almost all my mother’s furniture squeezed into there.
*sigh*
The boxes the girls and I got into the basement are going to have to be gone though soon. We’ll unpack what will stay in the house, but the rest will need to be repacked and taken into the storage house, somewhere, before spring, when the basements start getting wet.
After the furniture was unloaded, my brother and SIL had to transfer a few things out of it to their car or their trailer, before the truck could finally be parked back in its spot by the barn and they could finally head home. I’m still waiting in anticipation for a message telling me they arrived home safe and sound! I’m really hoping the winds have started to die down. It had started to snow lightly before it got dark, and will continue to snow, off and on, throughout the night.
Meanwhile, I’m just glad we finally got it done. It was brutal – especially with the weather! – but it’s done.
With our not being able to get our city stock up shopping, though, I’m going to have to go into town tomorrow (Sunday) and do a smaller shop. Which means we’ll have to take that mattress and box spring out of the truck, so I can close the tailgate. The dump won’t be open again until Tuesday, so that’s the earliest we can get rid of them. Unless the garage is able to get us in to get that sensor fixed/replaced. I’ll find that out on Monday.
I am so tired of winter.
According to the long range forecast, we’ve got another week of relatively milder temperatures, but then we’re supposedt to start to get highs above freezing more often than not, for the rest of February!
I can’t believe it’s already the last day of January. Where has the month gone???
Before heading to the garage, I backed the truck up to check the oil levels. They were fine, but there was fresh oil drops in the dirt floor under where it was parked for the night. During the drive in, it was the same as yesterday. The pressure gauge started off in the normal range, then slowly dropped during the drive in.
I dropped the truck off at the garage, then walked over to the hospital to visit with my mother. She was doing better today, thankfully. She was able to move around without the screaming and yelling in pain.
The irony of this is that she complained about the noise the other patients and staff were making. Hospitals should be quiet, because sick people need quiet.
I talked to her about making sure to accept painkillers regularly, BEFORE the pain gets bad. She can ask for more and, if it’s an issue, they might schedule her for painkillers more often or something.
I think she would prefer to yell and scream, to be honest. I don’t want to make light of her pain. Lord knows, I can empathize with it a great deal. It’s more about her behaviour over it, and refusal to actually do what she should be doing for it, while expecting some doctor (not a black one) to fix what can’t be fixed.
I got there just as her lunch tray was about to be delivered. My mother was in her favourite corner chair, with the bedside table already in front of her, ready and waiting. As the woman dropped off the tray, she asked conversationally, your daughter is visiting? My mother, however, was just staring up at her, and didn’t seem to hear. I acknowledged that I was her daughter, but said I didn’t think my mother heard her. She went on to put a tea bag in the hot water for my mother, then asked if she needed help with the sugar packet. My mother was still just staring at her. Glaring, really.
The woman looked to be Vietnamese, which would be why my mother was staring and not answering.
I told her I would help if my mother needed it, and made sure to thank her as she left.
Once she was gone, my mother started behaving normally.
*sigh*
The lunch looked delicious. She had a slice of mushroom and pepperoni pizza, Caesar salad, vegetable soup with a packet of crackers and a bowl of canned fruit salad for desert, along with her tea. My mom said it was the first time she got pizza. It smelled awesome, and my mother polished it all off. The quality of the food is one thing my mother does not quite complain about, though she did say something about how they never give her bread (pizza crust doesn’t count). To my mother, bread should be part of every meal! 😁 She is happy with the food, though.
We had a pretty good talk. No really weird stuff. I got some messages from my sister, who was still at my mother’s place, it turned out. Then I got a message from my brother saying that my sister should keep the keys she has and lock up the apartment, rather than leaving them there, so I passed that message on.
That turned out to be a really good thing.
One of the things I’d left in case my sister wanted them was a set of dishes she had bought for my mother, but she said I could take them, as she won’t use them. We have so many dishes of our own, but they can join the other items we now have stored in a shelf in the root cellar, until we can figure out what to do with them.
I told my mother I planned to go to her apartment after I got the truck back, and she asked, to finish taking everything? I just had to laugh. I told her, you have no idea how much you have! I certainly can’t move her furniture by myself.
Some of the conversation was typically odd with my mother. She was wondering why I was back to visit, two days in a row, and I explained about the truck, and how our mechanic was going to get it done in between other appointments. Somehow, that got around to her talking about how garages take advantage of women (because, apparently, only women take their vehicles to a garage, and men all fix their vehicles themselves. She truly believes men are born knowing how to fix cares. She literally has said that to me!), and how it’s all moneymoneymoney.
I told her, people do need to be paid for their work! She seems to think everyone should be doing things for free – except her, of course. She wants to be paid back $10 for the extra keys she had copied, before turning them over to public housing when her rental agreement is done.
When I told her I wasn’t going to be charged for the work being done today, because it’s under warranty, she changed the subject.
I refilled the thermos travel cup I’d brought for her, and she said she was very happy to have that hot water. She isn’t even doing her half water, half milk thing. She just prefers to drink warm water, and adds it to the water from the pitcher they leave with her. As I was setting up the cup, plus a few other things for her, like refilling her crackers bowl, she started saying how I couldn’t understand the troubles she’s having, with her mobility. When I’m 90, I’ll understand!
I told her, I do understand. I have many of the same problems. She said this as I was reaching to set her bowl of crackers back on the window sill within her reach, and could barely do it because my elbow was giving out. I ended up telling her about falling and hurting myself, twice, last year, and how I still can’t put weight on my right knee, because that’s the one that landed on concrete. She asked what happened, and I told her about coming in from shoveling and my glasses frosting over while I hung the snow shovel up in the sun room, so I couldn’t see and tripped over something.
Her immediate response?
Why was I the one shoveling snow?
…
So… It’s my fault I got hurt, because the girls should have been shoveling snow, not me.
Got it.
I told her, I LIKE shoveling snow, but the girls do it, too, if I can’t. I just happened to be the one doing it that day.
The other odd thing was something I later called the nursing station back to warn them about.
My mother needed to go to the washroom, and was able to get herself there on her own, using the walker – I offered to help her with the hospital’s wheelchair, and she said no. Then she asked me to get a second garbage can set up with a bag. I was setting it under the bathroom sink, when I found out what she wanted to for.
To pee in.
There’s a commode, but it’s being stored in the washroom right now. She said, they want her to get up and walk around to use the toilet (I explained about the necessity of movement to help with her OA, which got a glare), but she didn’t want to use the commode. It had been beside her bed, but she claimed they forget about it and didn’t change it after it gets used. So instead, if she needs to go during the night, she planned to use the garbage can.
Well… at least it isn’t an ice cream pail, like she had been doing at home, until we got a commode for her!
I told her, don’t do that! Her response was, do you want me to pee on the floor?
*sigh*
Even with the odd stuff, it was a good and fairly quiet visit. When someone came for her food tray – a white person, so my mother was willing to talk to her – my mother started complaining about the noise. The nurse was good at deflecting!
My mother was soon ready to lie down for a nap – rejecting my offer to help her get into bed – and I headed out. After the wonderful smells of my mother’s lunch, I was really hungry! My husband had messaged me that he needed more needles at the pharmacy, so I headed in that direction and ended up stopping at the Dairy Queen for lunch this time. I had a store to stop in as well, but that was directly across the street from the pharmacy, which was handy. Once done at the pharmacy, I headed back to the garage, figuring they might be done by then.
When I got to the parking lot, I saw the truck in the lot, with the engine running. They had just finished it, and was running it to check on things. Outdoors, rather than the closed garage!
When the mechanic was free, he told me it was looking good. The leak was fixed with the highest quality seal available – he still doesn’t understand why it started leaking again. I got instructions to keep an eye on the gauge, check for fresh leaks under the truck, and check the oil levels. The oil level right now is fine, and everything seems to be running smoothly.
When I got in the truck, though, the needle on the gauge was even lower than before.
It obviously wasn’t something he felt was a concern, but I don’t like it!
My next stop was my mother’s apartment, but I needed to get gas, first. So I drove to a gas station that was on my usual route towards home. I figured, if I shut the engine off for a while, the gauge might reset itself.
It didn’t.
On the plus side, it wasn’t dropping, either. It was really steady. The only time the needle almost reached that first line above zero was when I decided to test things and gunned it to 110kph. As soon as I returned to the speed limit, down it dropped to the same level and stayed there.
With the route I was taking, I could drive to the highway closer to us, then decide if I’d be turning towards my mother’s apartment, or heading home.
Thanks to knowing my mother’s apartment would be safely locked up, I headed home.
As soon as I was stopped, I got the picture to send to our mechanic. I then went into the garage to brush aside the oil stains in the dirt floor, so we could tell if there were any new drips, before parking. Once inside, I sent the picture to our mechanic, describing what I was seeing (and what was different), though I don’t expect to hear from him necessarily today. He was so swamped, even with two other mechanics in today.
I also updated my siblings.
Now, I’ve driven with that oil gauge at zero for quite some time. When we were having MAF issues, the oil sensor also got replaced. So this is still a new sensor. It shouldn’t be misreading. Yet, he could find no other problem that might cause the sensor to be reading low oil pressure. For all I know, the sensor is reading “normal”, but the needle is simply stuck at the wrong spot.
My brother will be out here tomorrow to dig out his own truck, so I will follow them with my truck to my mother’s place, and help bring things here. The truck should be fine. My brain knows that – but I am so bloody paranoid about it, I don’t want to make the drive on my own in case something happens along the way. We depend on it so much!
This is where I remember my mother was promising to buy us a car back in the summer, but apparently my sister talked her out of it. Granted, my mother thought she had enough money to buy a new car, with zero understanding of how expensive new cars are right now. With my mother’s habit of promising things, then backing out at the last minute, none of us expected her to actually do it. Still, it does… frustrate.
Hopefully, all will work out with the truck tomorrow. I’ll be a lot more comfortable driving it with my brother nearby.
The thing is, with all this stuff going on, we still need to go our stock up shopping trips to the city, a trip to the dump, a trip to the feed store, etc. Thankfully, we have enough kibble to last another week, for both indoor and outdoor cats, but we’re almost out of wet cat food for the indoor cats. Even without having to get my mother’s apartment emptied, this is the time of the month when we do most of our driving.
This truck is certainly not the first vehicle we’ve own that’s been like this, but for having it for only 2 years, there has been a lot!
Today was my day to bring the truck in to the garage to see what was going on with my oil pressure. I was sure there was a new leak somewhere.
I’m so glad I did.
While unplugging the block heater, I made sure to look under the truck, but could see no soil of oil leaking. That doesn’t mean much, though. When we had major issues before that turned out to be a leaking oil line seal, we never saw any sign of a leak under the truck. I got that fixed and our pre-winter oil change at the same time, so this was just a few months ago. It had been fine since then.
While driving back from my mother’s apartment a couple of days ago, I noted the check engine light had turned off. This morning, it turned back on again, less than a mile from home. The code for that is not something essential, and related to the cold. The more relevant thing was that, in the 20 or so minutes it takes to drive to town, I was watching that oil pressure gauge slowly dropping.
I dropped the truck off a bit early. The owner was there on his own today, and the bays were all full, so I figured it might be a while. I updated him on what I was seeing on the way here, then dropped off the keys.
I’ve been messaging with my sister regarding my mother. Yesterday, after visiting at the hospital, she was able to go to the apartment and take the things she was supposed to grab for her place. We were trying to figure out how to get my mother’s keys back, though. While we were chatting, she mentioned my mother was out of crackers. Since it was warm enough (-21C/-6F), and the grocery store was along the way, I picked a box up for her, then walked to the hospital to visit.
My mother was happy to see me, for the most part. Glad that I brought her crackers. She was in bed and, when I asked how she was doing, she said she was in a lot of pain. Then started saying, since my brother and I are so smart, maybe we could find her a good doctor that knows what to do about it.
*sigh*
I had to explain to her, she has osteoarthritis. There really isn’t anything that can be done, other than taking pain killers. Apparently, a nurse told her that her mother gets injections every three months for her hip pain. I said yes, that works for some people, but that requires a referral to a specialist (like the sports injury clinic I was referred to) in the city, because nowhere else does those injections. That would then require getting her transported for the appointment in the city. I explained about my own OA, and my husband’s back injury and his pain levels. He’s on the strongest painkillers available, and highest doses, and his pain levels are barely affected. In her case, all she can really do is take those painkillers, because there’s no fix to her condition.
Not long after, a nurse came by to check on my mother, asking if she needed help with pain. She told him no, she was okay. I asked if she was sure, since she was just telling me about how much pain she was in, and she said yes. After he was gone (she made sure to wait until her door was closed), she told me she’d just taken 12 pills that morning, and she didn’t want to take more. Her painkillers were scheduled for 2:00, so she would wait.
It was 10:20. I asked again, was she sure? It would be almost 4 hours of a wait. She insisted. She wanted to give all those other pills time to work.
She gets her meds at 9am.
Okay. If she didn’t want to take them, we can’t force her.
The rest of the visit was a mix of good and strange and, is it time for me to leave now? I was able to distract her away from her usual rants, for the most part, at least. She asked about what was being done with her apartment (and why doesn’t my brother phone her? never mind they visited, not that long ago), and I filled her in. Then she started giving instructions on what to do for things, even though she had no idea about the process, like how to get the commode returned. She also insisted that we not give public housing the extra keys she had cut for my brother and I, unless they are willing to pay her “back” her $10. I pointed out that we would have no use for keys for an apartment she doesn’t live in. Oh, we can label them and hang them somewhere. Why? Well, maybe if someone moves into her apartment. How would we even know about that? She had no answer, but she really didn’t want us to turn over those keys unless she got paid back for them.
She also went on a rant about how the hospital staff just doesn’t care. The doctor never comes to see her (she is officially no longer a patient, but a long term care resident, now that she’s been approved for a personal care home), etc. Also, people are in the hallways, talking and laughing, and they shouldn’t be doing that.
*sigh*
After visiting for quite a while, as I was getting ready to leave, about to put my coat on, she finally mentioned she got another visit from our vandal. So I went back and sat down, asking her questions about how that went. She said he was behaving, at least, but when I asked when he visited, she couldn’t remember. I asked if it was the same day as my sister’s visit (yesterday) and she looked confused and said she couldn’t remember. So I don’t know if this was actually a new visit, or if she was referring to the same visit from our vandal she told me about, the last time I visited her. At least now the hospital has a picture of him on file, so they can recognize him as someone to watch out for. They can’t stop him from visiting, but they can make sure he doesn’t have a chance to start verbally abusing her again.
By this time in the visit, my mother had moved from lying in bed to sitting at the side of her bed. She then wanted to get up and move to her favourite chair. As soon as she started trying to stand up, though, she started yelling and screaming in pain! I tried to help her and she was able to stand up to the walker the hospital provided. She said she needed to go to the washroom, but only managed to transfer herself to the chair I’d just vacated. I kept asking her if she wanted me to get a nurse to help, but she wouldn’t answer. Finally, once she was seated, but couldn’t stand up again, I told her I was getting help.
I found the nurse that had come by earlier, just finishing up with a patient in another room nearby, so I asked him for help, telling him about my mother’s pain and that she was wanting to get to the bathroom. I added that, while my mother had just refused painkillers not long ago, she will probably need some, and he agreed. He started following me, as I rushed ahead to let my mother know help was coming.
As I got to her, she started telling me, she thinks the hospital is giving her medications to cause this pain.
Which is when the nurse came in behind me. He started bringing the wheelchair over so he could help her get to the washroom, when she started taking to him that she thinks they are giving her the wrong medications, and that’s why she is in so much pain. From the resigned body language, I get the impression he’s had issues with my mother. Being both a male nurse (to my mother, nurses should be female, doctors should be male) and Asian, it’s likely she has been less than kind to him! He told her, they can’t give her the wrong medications because, if they did, they would lose their license.
I don’t know if she really heard that, though I know it would have made no difference if she did, but she went back to screaming and yelling in pain, trying to transfer to the wheelchair. They’re going to have to get the chair she was in, cleaned. 😢
He wheeled her to the washroom, so I got myself out of the way, grabbing my things and heading out- making sure to thank the nurse for helping my mother as I left! She was already making things hard for him.
*sigh*
Before I left, I took the time to update my family about how things went, then headed out. It was getting close to lunch time by then, and there’s a Chinese restaurant in the motel next to the garage, so I headed for there. I took a quick look at the garage parking lot and couldn’t see the truck anywhere, so it was at least in the garage by then.
After I had my lunch and headed back to the garage, I still couldn’t see the truck, so I was surprised when I didn’t see it in the garage, either.
The owner was on the phone in the office when I got there, so he was soon able to update me.
He found the leak, in exactly the same place as before – except worse! He was really surprised by how much oil had leaked. It even leaked onto the floor of the vehicle bay, which it didn’t do the last time it was worked on.
We talked about it for a bit, and he has no idea why this new seal is leaking. Perhaps a defective part? He ordered me a new one, this time going with a higher end brand, just in case.
It will be covered by warranty, too, so that helps!
When he mentioned that it was leaking enough to drip onto his floor, I told him, I saw no signs of leaked oil under our truck. Which means it got worse, just during the drive in, today! I asked him if it was possible that it got damaged when I tried to start it while it was frozen (thinking of those noises I heard when I did). He was very doubtful. Still, we had had no signs of a problem until after that deep freeze. Granted, with having to pull the truck all the way into the garage so we could close the door, I couldn’t access the front to open the hood and check the oil levels. So I can’t say with 100% certainty that it hadn’t started leaking earlier. The only evidence of there being a problem was that oil pressure gauge suddenly dropping, two days ago, while I was driving to my mother’s apartment.
We are both perplexed.
The part he ordered will arrive tomorrow morning. He told me to text him in the morning about coming in. He is fully booked tomorrow, but he’ll have a couple of other guys in, and he will squeeze my truck somewhere in there. I asked him if he topped up the oil level, and he told me he didn’t have to. It seems that I over filled it with my last addition when I got home from my mother’s apartment! He did instruct me to check the oil level again, before coming back tomorrow, in case I needed to add more. That’s how bad the leak was!
When it was time to go, I had to ask him where the truck was.
He checked his cameras…
… then went out to move the ambulance waiting to be worked on out of the way, so I could back out and leave. 😄 No wonder I couldn’t see it!
Once I was clear, I stopped just long enough to let my family know I was on the way home.
Then watched the oil gauge slowly dropping again during the entire drive.
I am so glad I got that checked before doing any major driving around. Especially before doing our first city stock up shop!!!
Before pulling into the garage, I stopped to double check, confirming that there was zero sign of any oil leak visible on the dirt floor.
Once I was home, I updated the family in more detail, then updated my siblings. In talking keys with my sister, and my hopes of getting to my mother’s apartment tomorrow, she told me she could meet me there in the morning, but only for a short time. Now that I know I’ll be back at the garage tomorrow, I suggested she leave them with my mother tomorrow morning. That is likely the best way to get them to my brother, who is dealing with public housing in regards to my mother’s rental agreement.
At that point, it was only just past 1pm, and the weather was so nice (-18C/0F), I wanted to take advantage of it and headed back outside to do some shoveling. I needed to clear the drifts blocking part of our turnaround space in the yard, as well as a couple of paths that were blocked in places with drifts. I was out there for a couple of hours.
Gosh, did it feel good!
I’ll have to be extra diligent with the meds tonight, though, or I’ll be barely able to walk, tomorrow!
By the time I was finished, it was time to feed the outside cats.
They were enjoying the lovely weather, too! Especially this bunch.
I am so glad we had that old catio roof panel to scavenge as a wall for the shelf shelter! It makes for a lovely greenhouse effect, and they can see out at the same time. There are at least 9 cats in that photo! Plus I think one ran out when I went by to put away the shovel in the sun room.
That done, I finally headed inside for the day – and a lovely supper featuring bacon wrapped pork tenderloin, my daughters made.
Today was quite pleasant, but we are supposed to drop to -30C/-22F tonight. If the long range forecasts are at all accurate, we won’t get that cold again for the rest of the winter. Tomorrow’s high, however, is supposed to be sunny and almost as warm as today, so I expect I will do the walk to the hospital after dropping off the truck and be able to visit my mother again.
I can’t believe we’re at the end of January already.
Hopefully, she will have accepted the offered painkillers and will be doing better. For someone who complains so much about her pain levels, she is so unwilling to actually accept the only thing that can really make a difference. Yet very willing to expect some magical doctor somewhere (a white male, of course) to magically fix something that has no fix, while at the same time convincing herself that the people taking care of her are deliberately causing her pain.
If all goes well, my truck will be worked on and finished early enough that I can still get to my mother’s apartment and bring some things back with me. I especially want to get that wheelchair, as the hospital asked me to bring it in a while ago. Then on Saturday, I plan to be back with my brother and SIL as we take the last of everything out, and try to find somewhere to store them here at the farm.
After all that, I should FINALLY be able to do our stock up shopping in the city!
Today, I finally made it to my mother’s apartment. My brother and SIL had already done a huge amount. My focus was on stuff that I needed to bring here, that WON’T go into the storage buildings. Antique books. Kitchen supplies, some of which are part of sets still here on the farm. Lots of fragile stuff.
On the way out, my first stop was actually our post office. My husband’s disabled parking permit expires next month, so we had to mail in a form and $15 for a new one. With that taken care of, it was off to my mother’s apartment, which is typically about a 25 minute drive, with good road conditions.
Road conditions were good, but I was watching that oil pressure gauge slowly dropping, the drive in. By the time I got to my mother’s, it was right on the line between “normal” and “low” ranges.
Crud. With a day like today, I don’t think I can blame a cold sensor anymore.
Once at my mothers, I brought in a whole bunch of hard sided grocery bags, as the things I would be packing would be unpacked fairly quickly. Putting them in the grocery bags ensures we won’t procrastinate, since we’ll need them for our stock up shopping!
The next while was spent going through things, packing things into the bags I brought, going through a couple of boxes my brother and SIL packed and switching things over (I’m the only one in the family that has any interest in my mother’s antique crochet and embroidered items, most of which were made by her aunt). I also found some remotes, one of which I was to bring home, the other my brother needs to grab.
While I was there, someone started to come in the door – while I was in the washroom, of course! – calling out. It turned out to be the social worker from the Senior’s Centre. Perfect! She was able to take the flat folding walker they’d loaned my mother. It turns out, they also take care of the Lifeline equipment, which my brother had carefully packed all together. She took that and would take care of cancelling the account. I told her it was already suspended, so my mother wasn’t being charged full price.
After a while, I headed out to the truck with a couple of bags, then took the time to check the oil level.
It was low. Very low.
!!!
After the issues we had before, I now keep several bottles of oil and a funnel in the truck. There was one that was about 3/4 full, so I added that. I checked the oil after, and the level was in range.
Over the next while, I packed more things and took them to the truck, in stages, I ran the engine every now and then. Pressure seemed okay for a parked vehicle.
Along with packing, I was able to empty the fridge completely, and did as much cleaning as my wrecked knees would allow. Then I popped the stove’s to up so I could scrub underneath, where there was an old burned spill. Last of all, I gathered up the old prescription medications that were found, so I could take them to the pharmacy for proper disposal.
In the end, I was there for about 4 hours. I packed the truck with three boxes my brother and SIL had packed that I’d added to, plus another 7 hard sided grocery bags.
We’re doing to have to store this stuff in the basement until we can figure out what to do with them! A project for later this evening, since we need to unpack those grocery bags. I’ll need them, for our city stock up shops.
The first of which was supposed to be tomorrow.
Not going to happen.
I stopped at the pharmacy to drop off the old meds and let them know they would no longer be doing my mother’s bubble packs. So that file will go from being suspended to being cancelled, though of course we can still access her records, if needed.
Then I headed home.
Watching that oil gauge slowly dropping, the whole way.
I’d already texted our mechanic about the oil level being low and adding 3/4L, and asking about the possibility of bringing it in to look for a leak. Also, about that Journey he had on the lot he’d mentioned to me, yesterday…
I don’t know that we can wait until spring to do the trade in.
When I got home, he’d responded, asking me to keep an eye on the oil levels for the next while. I answered saying that I was home, telling him the pressure was dropping the whole drive back, and that I would check it again after unloading.
After unloading, I pulled half way into the garage, so I had room to access everything.
The oil level was low.
Just barely touching the “fill” line.
I added another half liter.
I messaged the garage before heading inside then phoned him once was was settled in.
I now have an appointment to bring it in on Thursday morning for them to see what’s going on. I won’t be doing any city trips until this is figured out.
As for that Journey… it actually does look right for our needs, though obviously there are things we can do with a truck that it can’t do. It’s a 2017 and high mileage, but anything that’s in our budget is going to be high mileage.
Its selling price is actually lower than what we still owe on the truck, I think.
Of course, I kept my brother and SIL in the loop, and my SIL wondered about using my mother’s car as a trade in.
I will need to confirm that possibility with my brother, since my mother owns half the car with me and, as her PoA, he will be the one to deal with. He might simply transfer full ownership to me to make it easier. My mother has been telling us to sell her car for years, so that would work for her, too.
Of course, no decisions are going to be made for a while, but we need to think about it. I don’t even know if we can get refinancing, though if we have two vehicles to trade in, with one owned outright, that would help. We simply can’t afford the truck. They did the best they could to get us an amazing price – I’m convinced it was sold to us at a loss – but once the taxes were added, that kicked it over, and the monthly payments have been higher than what our upper limit was. We had no choice, and it really has been hurting us financially. Not just the payments, but all the sometimes bizarre issues that have come up with the truck that have cost so much.
Speaking of which, that check engine like turned off on its own again.
I love the truck, but I will never own a GM vehicle again! Not even the Uplander gave us more grief, and the dealership screwed us over on that one. Still, I was able to buy the Uplander using my debit card. Beggars can’t be choosers!
Well, we shall see.
Tomorrow, I won’t be going anywhere. Hopefully, my sister will be able to make it to my mother’s apartment and take the things intended for her place. On the weekend, my brother is going to have to dig his own truck out of the snow and see if it starts! Depending on how things go with our truck on Thursday, we might be relying entirely on his truck to get my mother’s furniture out.
For now, I’m going to stop writing this and enjoy the supper my daughters made. 😊
Then we need to set up a sort of assembly line to get the boxes and bags into the basement, and away from cats!
Well, today’s focus has been on making sure the truck was okay. We depend on it so much!
Things warmed up slowly all night, and it was heading towards -20C/-4F when I headed out to do my morning routine, then went to see if the truck would start.
It did, thankfully. It didn’t even make those noises it made, yesterday. The battery gauge was right up there, though it dropped to normal fairly shortly, as the engine compartment warmed up.
I let it run for a bit, then headed back in. By about noon, we reached our expected high of -15C/5F, and I headed out again. This time, I drove the truck around the driveway and yard a bit. When I pulled into the garage, I made sure to leave enough space so I could open the hood. First, I did another scan. This time, only one code came up, and not the one that had me concerned. This is the one we’re pretty sure is a sensor affected by the cold.
That done, I popped the hood and listened to the engine, getting a short video to send to my brother. Aside from the idle getting very slow, everything seemed normal.
My next test was to wait until the post office reopened in the afternoon, and pick up the mail.
While waiting, I got a call from the hospital. They had called last night, too. My mother has been getting her Pepto regularly – during our meeting with the doctor, we all recognized it seems to have a placebo affect on her, and she was running out. We still have the extra bottles my brother had bought for her that made her so angry. If the truck was running well, I could bring one for her today.
The trip to the post office went perfectly normal. I had a surprise parcel waiting for me. Thanks, M, for the live animal trap! Hopefully, we’ll be able to make good use of it! Also, CZ, we finally got your Christmas card! 😄
From there, I headed home, dropped off the mail and parcels, grabbed a bottle of Pepto and headed to town.
I didn’t get far when I noticed something of concern.
The oil pressure gauge dropped significantly. Not enough trigger any alarms from the onboard computer, but enough to concern me. Especially after we had so much trouble before. Since that seal was replaced, we haven’t had any issues.
I seriously considered turning around and going home but decided against it. Town, after all, is where our garage is. I could stop there and talk them them about it.
The other reason I considered turning around was the weather. We had high winds from the north, blowing snow off the fields. I could see the road starting to drift over and, in places, it was whiteout conditions.
Once in town, I made a quick stop at the hospital. I dropped the Pepto off at the nursing station and asked them to extend my apologies to my mother for not visiting and why. I’m not sure she got the message, but they understood why I couldn’t just quickly say hi and left. It would have agitated her quite a bit.
Then I headed for the garage – and the oil gauge was pretty much where it was supposed to be, during the short trip!
When I got to the garage, I was happy to see the owner was in the office today. He’s been working at their new location quite a bit, so I’ve been missing him.
We had a good talk about things. He hadn’t even had a chance to look at the scan results I’d texted him yet. I told him I did another scan this morning and showed him the results. He agreed that it was likely because of the cold, and not a concern.
Then I told him about what happened on the way into town, with the oil pressure dropping. Would that also be because of the cold?
Yeah, pretty much. Particularly for our make and model. The sensor in most vehicles is located near the air filter. In our truck, it’s located off to the side, and in a corner. With the temperatures we’ve been having, the oil gets sluggish and, so far off to the side where it is, the sensor reads differently than if it were closer. As long as our oil level is fine, there is no concern.
He laughed when I explained why I haven’t been able to check the oil recently. If the truck is pulled into the garage enough to close the door, we can’t open the hood. There’s no room to access the front.
That lead me to start talking about the possibility of a trade in. I’d messaged about it, and even talked to one of his employees that worked on our truck while he was at their other location, and he was aware of it. I told him, we just can’t keep up with all these sensor issues. The inside handle of the driver’s side door broke off and we haven’t been able to fix it, because the budget kept having to be used for so many other things. As much as we like the truck, we can’t afford it.
What we’d talked about before, when we were first thinking to get another minivan, was the possibility of an SUV. It seems that trucks and minivans tend to cost a lot more – even older, high mileage ones like ours – but SUVs are easier to find and cost less, second hand. He knows our need for something accessibility and fitting a walker.
I’m not going to do anything until spring, though, which he totally understood. He will, however, keep us in mind as he acquires new second hand vehicles. There was a Dodge Journey right there that he suggested might fit our needs. I’ve looked it up since then and I tend to agree.
Then I talked about my mother’s car. He remembers it – he certainly did a lot of work on it! I explained that I stopped driving it when it made a loud banging noise in the back, but just this past summer, my brother checked it out and could find nothing wrong. It’s purring like a kitten, and no sign of anything to cause that noise. We’re looking to sell it. After talking about it for a bit, he said we could bring it in. He can go over it, check things out, and safety it, and let us know what we could expect to get for it.
It’s not going to be much.
Again, this will happen in the spring.
I left the garage, much relieved.
The grocery store is across the street, so that was my next stop. I had a short list but, with the weather – and funds my daughter sent me – I was able to make a larger shop. Then it was a quick stop at the gas station to fill the tank before heading home.
I’m really glad I didn’t stay longer with a visit to my mother. Heading home meant driving on the side that was starting to drift over. It wasn’t too bad, yet, but that clearly wasn’t going to last much longer.
I was quite glad to get home!
I have to admit, I’m increasingly paranoid when it comes to our transportation. A few years ago, when we still had the minivan, we got slammed with a series of polar vortexes all through January and February. Our van froze, as did my mother’s car. We couldn’t go anywhere for almost 2 months. The van came through fine, once it warmed up again. The first winter we had with this truck, we couldn’t even plug in the block heater, as the plug turned out to be missing, and it handled the cold just fine. So I really shouldn’t be this anxious about the truck. Yet, we’ve had so many problems with so many different vehicles, I can’t help myself.
Well, I’m going to have to get over it. I need to get to my mother’s apartment and start bringing things here. After my sister grabs what she’s supposed to take to her place, next weekend is when we’re going to have to empty the apartment and bring the rest of the stuff, including furniture, here. Before that, my brother has to break their snow blower out, so he can access his own truck, plus clear access to the storage house and the warehouse – both of which are already so full with my parent’s belongings. The more I can bring back here in advance, the easier it will be to finish the job.
Meanwhile, it a couple of days, I expect to be heading into the city for our first stock up shopping trip for next month.
I need to do a lot of driving.
I pray the truck will be up to it. Intellectually, I’m sure it will be, but there’s that part of my that’s constantly concerned something else is going to go wrong!
Get three cats to the vet for spay/neuter. That’s an hour’s drive one way, so we were going to drop them off, then stay in the (smaller, nearer) city to do any shopping we needed until we got the call to pick up the cats. Typically, that’s been around 1 or 2, though I’ve have them call me before noon at times.
Once the cats were picked up, we’d take them home, I’d drop them and our shopping off with my daughter, then I would go to my mother’s apartment in the town south of us, check on things, clean her fridge, pick up the wheelchair the hospital requested, then go to the town north of us, to my mother’s in the hospital. They want to measure her in it and see if it’s appropriate to go with her to a personal care home, whenever that happens.
After dropping off the wheelchair, I planned to visit with my mother for a while. Due to her cognitive issues, she was not told that there was an appointment at 6pm with my brother, as PoA, the doctor and myself, as her advocate for the past 7+ years. From there, I expected to go home.
Of course, that didn’t happen.
Well. Part of it happened.
The first thing to do was get three fasting cats from the isolation shelter, into carriers. We really, really wanted to get Frank. She was perched on the shelf above the cat bed, in the middle, where it was hard for either of us to reach her from the sliding windows. She did get close enough that my daughter could get her, but I couldn’t get around to get the carrier closer before Frank escaped.
Frank does NOT want to get got!
Thankfully, my daughter did not end up bleeding. (Side note: I finally found the scratch proof gauntlets today! They were hiding in plain sight, of course….)
So we grabbed who we could. That turned out to be Sir Robin, who is extremely easy to get got, Grommet, also and easy one, and a grey tabby with no name, because it was the biggest of the remaining cats in the shelter.
Oh, and we had 7 cats and kittens in there to fast overnight, not 8. I was sure there was a second tabby kitten in there, but I was wrong.
The tabby was not happy. This is a kitten we’ve been able to pet and pick up, but nowhere near as socialized as the other two. We were 99% sure this one was male. We’ve got several similar looking, short haired, grey tabbies that move around so much, I’m never quite sure if I’m looking at the same one twice.
Our goal was to be on the road by 7:30, to get to the clinic for 8:30, though our drop off time was 8:50.
We did manage to be on the road by 7:30, but with road conditions in places, we per parking at the clinic closer to 8:45. Which is why I always like to leave early!
During the drive in, I brought up that we needed a name for the tabby. Neither of us could think of one right away, but while checking them in, my daughter came up with Flopsy, because when we pick him up, that’s how he gets. Flopsy.
Once the cats were checked in and taken to the back, my daughter and I headed over to the Walmart and had breakfast at the McRaunchies there. It was shortly after 9am by then.
After breakfast, we did our shopping. With the polar vortex expected to hit soon, we had a few things we wanted to restock on, plus we found extras. That will get its own post later, since it did turn out to be a larger shop.
I got a message from my husband that one of my packages is in, so I added picking that up on my list of things to do after dropping off the cats at home.
When packing things into the box of the truck, we were selectively packing things into insulated bags to prevent them from freezing, rather than the other way around.
Of course, since I needed to get up and get on the road early in the day, I had an almost sleepless night. I was pretty tired, so we warmed up the truck and just stayed in it, while I tried to nap a bit. We had to turn the truck on to warm up again only once in that time.
After a while, though, I needed to use the washroom, so I headed back into the Walmart, while my daughter stayed in the truck. I hadn’t realized, while I was napping, that the weather had already started to turn. A huge wind had picked up, and there was blowing snow, everywhere. Not new snow. The wind was picking up any loose snow out there, and the parking lot was in whiteout conditions!
I headed in for a few minutes then decided to go to a Dollarama that shares the same parking lot. I found a few things there before rejoining my daughter in the truck.
By this time, it was well past noon and I was expecting to get a call from the clinic soon. My daughter needed her turn to use the facilities, so we both went in and ended up finding a few more things to purchase. Once we were done there, we decided we may as well go to the clinic. We could be in their waiting room instead of the truck, and it wouldn’t be too long, right?
Right?
We got there before 2, only to find out they hadn’t even started on any of the kittens yet.
Keep in mind, these poor things had been fasting for about 17 hours by then. It turned out the clinic had a couple of large dogs needing surgery that took more time, so doing the kittens got delayed.
Now, I hadn’t bothered to tell them that I had a 6pm appointment, because… well… it was at 6pm, and we dropped off at 8:45-8:50am. They know we hang out in town because of the long drive, and they’ve always made a point to do our cats quickly because of that.
Not this time!
When I found out the cats hadn’t been started yet, I told them that I had a scheduled appointment. I was assured the cats would be read by 4. I explained, it’s not just the appointment, but that I was needing to drop the cats of at home in our little hamlet, then drive to one town to pick up a wheelchair (forget cleaning out the fridge, at this point!) and take it to the hospital in yet another town.
I was told they would try to get them done as soon as possible.
So we sat to wait.
Next to a couple of adorable kittens in a cat cage that were available for adoption. While there, a tech came to get them and return them several times, and we learned that they were about to be adopted out together! So glad they are staying together.
It was about quarter past three when a tech came out. They were about to start on Sir Robin the Brave, but he had messed himself in the carrier (they’ve been in carriers all this time?? They usually get transferred to larger cages!), and his back end was a dried up mess. She confirmed that these were outdoor cats and that they would be going outside again, so they would try to wash him off as best they could, rather than just shave the area. Easier and faster to shave, but no one wants to risk him getting frostbite on his nethers!
Which means they didn’t actually start the surgery until probably half past three.
We could hear the techs talking at one point, probably while still trying to wash off Sir Robin, and heard them giggle with delight over his full name.
Then we waited.
When 4:00 came and went, I was messaging my brother to warn him I might be late.
Finally, at about 4:20, someone came out to let us know the cats were done. Still groggy, but awake enough that we could take them. We got the instructions (we’ll keep them in the isolation shelter for at least 3 days) and the carriers were brought out. I’d already left the donation funds with the front desk when we checked them in, so we could leave immediately. My daughter and I loaded the carriers and were on our way.
Thankfully, by this time, the winds had died down a little bit, and there wasn’t as much blowing snow. I was able to do the speed limit for most, not all, of the drive.
Once we got home, my daughter got out to open the gate, but left it open for me as I drove into the yard and up to the house. I started unloading our shopping just to the front steps until my daughter caught up and helped me. Once the truck box was empty, we unloaded the carriers. Then my daughter took over while I headed back out again.
I just barely made it in time.
I had just parked at the hospital when I got a message from my brother. They had just arrived themselves, were set up in a family room for the meeting, and told me where it was.
The doctor was a few minutes later, so we had time to catch up and focus on what we were trying to find out, etc.
At one point, my SIL asked, how do we respond if they try to send my mother home again?
My answer was simple.
No.
That’s it. Just, no. They can’t send her home. Homecare is not reliable, and I can’t be driving that distance – especially in winter! – to cover for them so often.
Thankfully, that never became an issue.
The doctor came in and actually recognized us, from when my mother was in the hospital almost a year ago. There was a nurse as well, who was also the note taker for the hospital (my brother took his own notes, of course. He’s very organized that way).
We had a very good and, I would even say productive, meeting.
One thing is clear. The left hand doesn’t know what the right hand is doing.
They knew nothing about the panels done by home care – I was there for both of them, including the one that was done before my mother went to the hospital – even though the report would have gone up to the same department the hospital has to go through when it comes to long term care assessment. He was able to let us know what was found in my mother’s X-rays that were finally done, though it wasn’t “official” since the radiology department still had to review them. As expected, she has severe osteoarthritis. That’s the source of her pain. He did not have access to my mother’s MRI brain scan results, but he could work on getting them.
We were very confused when he started talking about my mother’s congenital heart disease as the cause of her edema, when she’s been seen by a cardiologist, and her heart checked out better than most people a quarter her age.
Oh, wow. I just went out to meet the prescription delivery driver. That wind out there is BRUTAL!!!
Where was I?
Oh, yes.
So the doctor explained that they use the term “congenital heart disease” to cover a lot of things. In my mother’s case, it’s her A-fib, which she’s had forever (I have it, too). It has never been a problem. Now, however, he basically described it as the upper chambers of her heart being in a constant quiver, while the lower chambers are pumping normally, when it used to be just a little hiccup now and then. To put it simply, her heart is getting tired and misfiring more. This is what my father got a pace maker for, but she’s not at that stage. It didn’t come up as an option, though; we all know that at her age, surgery would be a greater risk than the A-fib is right now. That her heart is otherwise strong and healthy and all her arteries are clear helps, but it won’t stop the edema.
In the end, my mother has two issues going that mean she can no longer go back to her apartment to live independently, even with home care. There’s the edema, and the OA, and right now, the OA is causing her so much pain and reducing her mobility, it’s actually the more severe issue.
Then he had to get our consent (which they already got from my mother) to do a panel for my mother to go to a personal care home.
…
YES!!!!
Good grief. We’ve begging for this from the start.
So the official hospital testing and paperwork will be done and go to the department that makes the decisions. Because 1) my mother’s level of care doesn’t need hospital status, 2) she’s bored out of her tree and 3) they need the bed for more urgent patients, my mother will probably be transferred to a temporary long term care facility – she may even be back in the same town her apartment is in! – before being transferred to the nursing home she’s been trying to get into for the past 2 years or so. Even then, she might get transferred to a different one before she get get into the one she wants. Once she’s in a long term care facility, even a temporary one, there will be more programs and activities available to her, so she won’t be stuck sitting in her room, day after day.
We did also have a chance to discuss some other issues related to our vandal and that he might try to convince my sister to help him manipulate my mother. He’d managed to do this with my late father. Right now, the one thing protecting my mother from her own self sabotage is that my brother has binding PoA, so even if she is declared mentally unfit, he can take care of her. They already understand that, at this point, cognitively she cannot make things like legal decisions on her own, but they will get her officially tested and assessed, so that there is documentation. This way, even if they do convince her to sign something, it won’t be legally binding. My mother, with my sister’s help (“I was just following her wishes”, was her explanation) has already messed herself up so badly in other areas, she has no clue what she’s done and, legally, my brother can’t fix it. They also want photos of our vandal and my sister to have with my mother’s file, so they can recognize them as people with limited access to my mother.
I’m so disappointed that my sister got manipulated into it, and is completely oblivious to the harm she has helped cause. Honestly, I have concerns about my sister’s cognitive health, too. But she’s skinny, and we all know skinny people are perfectly healthy and never have such problems, even if she is almost 70.
Yeah, I’m being sarcastic, but that is essentially what I’ve been told flat out, in different ways.
So then we got to talking about my mother’s apartment. She’s not going back, we know that, but until the panel process officially declares that, it’s recommended we don’t end that contract yet. However, it’s basically 99.99% sure the panel application will accept that she needs to be in a personal care home, so go ahead and start packing. We can basically cancel her services while we pack and empty the apartment, little by little, so that once that official word comes through (and we don’t know how long that will be), all we would need to do is cancel her rental agreement with public housing.
That all done, we parted ways, then went to visit my mother. She was very surprised to see us (we learned my sister did visit earlier, as today is her non-sabbath related day off), and happy, too. Which was a nice change.
The visit was… about as good as can be. She was in a good mood and I think her pain levels are under control, as she had only a few “moments”. We updated her on the status of things, as best we could. We explained the importance of her accepting any transfer they offer her, because it’s part of the whole process of getting her where she wants to be.
Which was when she started talking about “going home”. Meaning, her apartment.
*sigh*
We had to go over that with her again. I expect we’ll have to do it many more times. The doctor, thankfully, is quite aware of her self sabotage. Sadly, this is something they encounter quite a bit.
While talking about temporary long term care and getting her to where she wants to be, she told us about someone that was across the hall from her. He was doing very poorly, they had to wrap his legs, there was always someone having to tend to him…
He just got transferred to the nursing home my mother wants to be in.
She was upset that he got in before she did.
…
We had to explain (again) that people who get taken to nursing homes more suddenly, it’s because they’re not expected to live long. People who are in far worse shape than she is in.
Her complete lack of empathy threw us, even though she does it all the time.
Things got off track a few times, but that did give me a chance to bring out a gift I got for my mother.
My mother has always loved to draw and is really quite good. She doodles all over. So I got her this.
An actual sketch pad, rather than the envelopes and scrap paper she’s been using, with tear off pages, and colouring pencils that don’t need to be sharpened. She already has pen and pencil.
I know it’s harder for her, with her vision getting worse, but she might have some good days and feel up to it. Or just be bored enough to try!
I honestly expected her to be angry, as she usually is when I try to give her things, but she was actually almost nice about it. She just commented on how she can’t really draw anymore, but we encouraged her.
We talked about her apartment, and she started telling us what to do with things. We had to reassure her, she didn’t have to worry about the “stuff”, we would take care of them, and we know she doesn’t want things thrown out (unless they are damaged or broken or course).
By the time we headed out, it was coming up on 8pm. I’d left home around 7:30, had breakfast somewhere before 9:30, and the only thing I’d eaten since then was a handful of cashews and a chocolate bar we’d picked up as road munchies, on the way home from picking up the neutered cats. I had hoped to stop somewhere to eat before going home, but it was so late and I was so tired, I just got some gas and headed home.
Just as I pulled up to the last stop sign, a couple of miles from home, the check engine light on the truck turned on.
*sigh*
I wasn’t about to check on it when I got home. My daughters, sweethearts that they are, had hot food almost ready for me by the time I got in.
What a long, long day, and I didn’t get anywhere near as much done as I had hoped.
I got to bed early (for me, anyhow), and woke up to this.
Yeah, that’s -31C/-24F with a wind chill of -46C/-51F
It could be worse. Some areas of our province were warned of wind chills of -50C/-58F.
That’s what I saw before heading outside to do the cat stuff, skipping most of my morning routine. By the time I got back inside, the temperature had dropped to -32C/-26F. When I headed out to meet the pharmacy delivery guy, it was back to -31C/-24F with the wind chill at -45C/-49F
The outside cats got their kibble and warm water. Even the heated water bowl in the sun room had some ice on top, and the one in the isolation shelter had frost on the edge closest to the window!
The isolation cats were all snuggled together in the cat bed. Last night, my daughter let out the “extras” that wanted to be let out, so there are now four teenagers in there right now. While I was doing the kibble and water, my older daughter gave the isolation cats a couple of cans of wet cat food. The benefits of being locked up in there is special food treats, which won’t freeze before they finish eating it.
It was still at -32C/-26F when I headed out again in the late morning. I got the truck going – it started fine and nothing sounds out of the ordinary – to get the OBDII scanner hooked up. I got the same code as last time; air-fuel ratio imbalance. Top recommendation is to replace the oxygen sensor. The other code concerns me more, though; power mode master input circuits mismatch. The top reported fix for that is replacing the ignition switch, while the next frequently reported fix is, replaced ignition switch wiring harness.
I’ve sent screen caps of the scans to our garage. I’m not as concerned about the O2 sensor. That seems to be temperature related, as it went away on its own, last time. Both code frequencies are listed as “common” for our truck’s make and model. I’ve looked up the parts and they don’t seem to be expensive, though these wouldn’t be local prices.
*sigh*
We really don’t need this. It’s the price of having an older, high mileage vehicle, but it was what we could afford and get financing for. Still, I’m so tired of these sensor issues – which apparently GM is notorious for.
Thankfully, we won’t need to go anywhere for several days. Today is supposed to be the worst for both cold and wind. Things are supposed to be a bit warmer, but still brutal, over the next three days. After that, we’ll have more average temperatures, with highs hovering above and below -20C/-4F.
Interestingly, the long range forecast is showing a whole lot of days above freezing, in February! February is usually colder than January. At least in the first couple of weeks. If the forecasts are in any way accurate, today and the next few days will be the last deep freeze of this winter.
I sure hope they are right. I so feel for the people that have to drive and work outside in these temperatures! Not to mention the critters out there. I’m glad we can at least provide some worth and reliable food and water for the yard cats – and whatever creature cleaned out every crumb of kibble in the catio shelter!
The plow went by, increasing the snow ridge at the end of the driveway. It really wasn’t that bad and we could have driven through. The problem is, between the plow ridges and the driving, the end of the driveway was getting narrower and narrower. I needed to get that opened up, before the next polar vortex hits.
I love that ice scraper. It does a bang up job of cutting through hard packed plow ridge snow!
Technically, today was warmer, and there was less wind, but even a slight breeze brought was was -20C/-4F to a “real feel” of -31C/-24F. I was well bundled but, by the end of it, my toes and finger tips were starting to feel it!
While I was out there, my mother called from the hospital. I didn’t see my daughter’s message until I was putting things away, almost an hour later. My mother apparently sounded frustrated.
So when I called back, I made sure to talk to the nurse, first. I found out that she has been refusing her afternoon pain meds. Because she’s been in so much pain with her back, and the Voltaren wasn’t enough anymore, they now have she scheduled to take painkillers 3 times a day, instead of “as needed”. She’s apparently been having better days and saying no to the pills.
When talking to her about it later, she told me, she’s taking so many pills! Which makes it sound like it isn’t that she’s in less pain, but that she just doesn’t want to take another pill.
*sigh*
I asked the nurse about my mother getting Xrays, but she could find nothing on the file about it. She made notes to talk to the doctor about it. I also brought up that we need to have a meeting with the doctor, so she made notes for someone that can check his schedule, and to call my brother to book a time. My schedule is flexible, so I can work around his.
Then I got transferred to my mother’s room.
*sigh*
She was shouting right from her “hello”. It actually hurt my ears. When I asked her why she was shouting, it was “so you can hear me.”
Yeah, Mom. I can hear you. So can everyone outside your door and down the hall!
No, I didn’t say that out loud.
She then starting complaining. No one is calling. No one is visiting. No one cares (she includes the hospital staff on that). Why doesn’t my brother call or visit?
So I told her about his going to her place to replace the window from the AC set up, then about the woman who fell. She actually knows the woman, as she often does the Gospel readings in church. When I told her about the fall and my brother taking her to the hospital, she only wanted to know, which hospital. I told her, and she started saying, she has children, why did my brother drive her. Her (adult) children weren’t there (I think they live in the city!). Even when I told her, my brother probably saved her life, because if he hadn’t seen her, there was a good chance she would have frozen to death before anyone got to her.
She didn’t care.
She also didn’t have any appreciation for my brother going out to her apartment in the severe cold, getting the window done, helping a neighbour, and still driving her to the farm to drop off the AC, in the dark.
Instead, she kept complaining about how no one calls or visits her. I finally told her that, right then, she was making me regret calling her back, and called her out on how nasty she was being.
She – sarcastically – thanked me for being open with her.
*sigh*
After that, the call was better. She did complain that money was probably taken from her bank account for her apartment. I told her that she IS still renting it. All her things are still there. Of course she has to pay for it. That got us to talking about her things and what she wants done with them.
Don’t throw anything away, she keeps saying.
We’ve got an entire building filled with personal belongings we packed from this house – a building we could really use as the workshop it used to be – that she insists we don’t throw away. Now, we’ll have more, and we’ve already run out of storage space.
Then she demanded I tell her what I planned to do with a particular mirror she’s had stuck in her storage closet for the past 10 years. Something she gets obsessed about, every now and then. I finally had to tell her, don’t worry about it. We’ll take care of it.
Then she started going on about how, really, my sister should be taking care of her more, she and her husband are both on pension, she doesn’t need to be working, she should be taking care of Mom.
I’m sure my sister has been nagged about that a few times, already!
I was eventually able to get a word in – right after she told me, she wants to get out of there! – and told her, I think her problem is, she’s bored. She’s there by herself, with nothing to do, and she’s bored. We talked about it a bit, and she agreed. She is bored and lonely! Which, I told her, is completely understandable!
Well, this post got interrupted by a call from my brother.
We have a meeting booked with the doctor. They got us in as quickly as they could, and it’s an evening meeting, so that works for my brother. It was noted that, since we are dealing with cognitive issues with my mother, she won’t be there, and won’t even be told about it. Our concern was that, if she knew in advance, she’d end up telling our vandal about it, and he could cause problems.
It sucks having to even consider these things.
As for me, I am done for the day. I’m glad I got the end of the driveway cleared, but I’m really going to be paying for it, tonight, even with my meds!
I have to admit, though, I did quite enjoy the shoveling!
This is what it was, this morning, shortly before I headed out to tend that yard cats. I did not do the rest of my morning rounds. -21C/-6F with a wind chill of -35C/-31? Yeah, I was feeling that.
As I write this, the temperature is the same, but the wind chill is now -42C/-44F
All night and all this morning, I was seeing posts about blizzard conditions, white outs, and the general advice of “stay home, if you can!” The bulk of the storm hit the south end of our province, though, so we’re mostly getting that wind, but very little new snow. A small blessing, but I’ll take it!
The weather warnings starting coming in fast on the weather group I’m on, yesterday. While my brother was still at my mother’s apartment. When he set up my mother’s portable AC, he got permission from the public housing department to remove a window. He set up a board with the exhaust port installed in it. In the winter, the AC’s hose was removed and 3″ Styrofoam insulation was set over the window. While we still don’t have anything official saying my mother isn’t going back to her apartment, we’re preparing it for that, anyhow, and he wanted to get the window and trim back in
In that cold.
He took extreme care to ensure nothing chipped, cracked or broke in the severe temperatures, and you’d never know it was ever taken out in the first place.
As he was packing the AC into his car to bring here (which I didn’t even know he was planning to do!), a woman came out of the church across the street.
Then slipped, fell and hit the back of her head on a concrete bench.
!!!
My brother went over to help, and was soon joined by a woman in my mother’s building who saw what happened through her window. The woman who fell was consious, but not moving. They helped her up and to her home, which was right next to the church. My brother checked under her hood, and found blood.
I’m convinced her winter gear saved her life.
As did my brother. She couldn’t get up on her own and, in this cold, even if she survived an unpadded blow to the back of her skull, the cold would have done her in within minutes.
My brother ended up driving her to the nearer city’s ER (the local hospital’s ER, just blocks away, is almost never open). Driving her was faster than waiting for an ambulance. My brother left her in good hands, then drove back to my mother’s apartment to finish loading his car, before coming here.
When he first told me he was planning to come here, he wasn’t sure if our roads were clear, so I went out to check the driveway. Our road was not plowed, but it didn’t need it. The winds swept it clear. Which probably meant the main road was drifted over. Our own driveway had some drifting, but I knew his car could make it all right. Being so much smaller than our truck, he would have plenty of room to pull up to the house and turn around without hitting the areas that were starting to drift over. So I left the gate open for him, then called him back. I did recommend he take a different route. Normally, he take a road that allows him to avoid driving past our vandal’s place, but that road doesn’t get as much traffic, and is not maintained as thoroughly. He agreed. Apparently, the last time they came out here and took their usual route, it was in very poor condition. The main road may not have been plowed, but it gets a lot more traffic, which would make it easier for him to get through.
After calling him back, I bundled up in layers and headed back out with the ice scraper and shovel. There was a fair bit of ice built up under a layer of snow on our front steps and sidewalk, and I didn’t want anyone to slip and hit their heads on a concrete step!
By then, it was getting dark, but it was also warmer than it had been earlier in the day. After clearing in front of the house as best I could, I went and started clearing the drift in front of our garage door, by the light of the yard light. I was just finishing that up when my brother arrived. He stayed long enough to drop off the AC and accessories, then headed home. He had about an hour to drive, and road conditions were getting worse. Happily, he got home safe and sound.
We now have my mother’s AC unit, that my brother bought for her. The first of many things that will end up coming here, over the next while.
I’d hoped to go to my mother’s today, as it was supposed to be warmer. Apparently, we did reach the predicted high of -17C/1F, but it was at around 4-6am! Not going to happen, today. (As I watch the giant maple branches out my window sway in the wind, amazed they haven’t broken off yet.)
The next few days, we’re supposed to reach highs warmer than -20C/-4F. More importantly, the wind is supposed to die down. I’m not sure on the timing of things, since I will also be taking three cats in for spay/neuter on Wednesday.
The last time my mother was in the hospital, it was at the end of January, beginning of February (less than a year ago!). We had to deal with weather issues then, too!
The older I get, the more I am starting to really dislike winter.
I had a strangely rough night last night. I wasn’t able to sleep, so when I heard my older daughter taking a break from work at about 3am, and we grabbed something to eat. Just as I settled down, I started to sneeze.
And sneeze.
And sneeze.
For the next hour, at least, I was either sneezing or fighting off sneezes. I have no idea what I was reacting to! Yes, I took antihistamines, but they made no difference.
I did finally get an hour of two of sleep, waking up as it started to get light out. I messaged with my brother and SIL a bit about tomorrow – though that may change – and meeting up at my mother’s apartment, then headed outside to do the morning routine.
The wind was brutal. We’d had a bit of snow during the night, which was actually appreciated, as the paths I wasn’t able to spread ashes over, plus the driveway were not as slippery. On the down side, the paths were also starting to fill in and drifts starting to form. Nothing to complain about, really. As the storm moved across the prairies, highways were being closed all over the place. The local highways group had people posting about poor visibility and road conditions, but they were still passable.
Once I was done, though, I had enough energy to grab some instant oatmeal for breakfast and then crashed for several hours, completely embedded by cats. I think they were cold!
We had a couple of packages we ordered that had reached the city, and my husband got a notification that one of them had arrived at our local post office. I decided to wait until the post office closed then reopened at 2pm, though, and sure enough the second package arrived from the city, too. So I headed out after the post office reopened.
Straight into a brutal wind. Conditions had definitely worsened. A drift was starting to form in front of the garage door that I had to shovel out before I could leave. The wonderful plow job on our gravel roads was being drifted over, and visibility was poor.
Thankfully, I only had to go a few miles.
One of the packages was a new office chair for my husband, to replace his broken one. He’s been using a small armchair for the past while, and it’s brutal on his back injury. Picking up the chair was not something that was going to wait!
As I write this, we are still at -15C/5F. When I got home, the wind chill was -35C/31F, but it has since dropped to -37C/-35F.
Tomorrow is supposed to be colder, and almost as windy.
Hopefully, my brother’s schedule will allow him to postpone going to my mother’s for a day!
As soon as we got the box inside, my daughter immediately started to assemble the chair for her father. While she worked on that, my husband got to check out the new “toy” he picked up, as something to keep in the truck.
Or for me to keep handy while working outside after the snow is gone.
Yeah. It’s a hammer, axe, multi-tool, with holster.
The second picture shows it opened up.
We were pleasantly surprised by the quality, to be honest. That axe is sharp! The knife is really good, too, and the screwdriver/file/bottle opener is also solid. The pliers don’t seem to be as strong, but it’s not going to be seeing heavy duty work. The hammer has surprising heft to it, and is actually useable.
I didn’t spot where they opened as I quickly looked at it, but there are several screwdriver tips in the handle that fit into the top of the axe/hammer head. There’s also a magnesium rod tucked in there somewhere, with a built in whistle.
I’m going to have to grab it from my husband and look it over again!
The “snowflake” that came with it is also surprisingly strong. Each tip is a different screwdriver tip or hex key and each space is a different size wrench, plus a bottle opener. One of the tips doubles as a box cutter. There’s a hole for the key ring, but the ring is flimsy. My husband will probably add a cord to it, instead. That’s something he will probably keep handy and find more useful.
The whole thing is absolutely hilarious, adorable – and may actually be useful! A lot of these multi-tool gadgets look great, but once you try to use them, their designs are not practical at all. I look forward to trying this thing out.
Meanwhile, it looks like the worst of the weather system has passed by. Wind will still be an issue, and any new snow expected isn’t supposed to show up until night time.
We’ll see how things are for my brother. His schedule is far less flexible, so I will adjust to what works for him.
Did quite a bit of running around today, which I’ll cover in another post. Since I was in town anyhow, I did a small grocery shopping trip that turned out to be bigger than originally planned. I was only there for bread, milk and cheese! 😄
This is what $121.25 looks like, but I got $20 off from my loyalty points.
Yeah, most of it fit into the one hard sided bag I brought.
One of my daughters mentioned we were running low on glass top stove cleaner, so I picked up a bottle of that. I also got a 12 pack each of Coke Zero and Fresca for the four of us, which were on sale.
There was actually ginger snap cookies in stock, so I got a box for my husband, along with two jugs of distilled water for his CPAP humidifier. I also got him some frozen tater tots as an each snack that he can prepare himself.
Then I got two packs of marble, two packs of white Old Cheddar, lactose free cheese, which were on sale. They didn’t have any 2L 3% milk in stock, so I got 2%.
I spotted hoagie sausages on sale, so I got two packages. The sale price is what used to be their regular price. The girls really like those. I also picked up a ring of garlic sausage, made by a local company.
Then, finally, I got the bread I was there for. Four loaves of regular white and whole wheat bread. The rye bread I normally get was on sale, and completely out of stock, so this was the substitute.
And that’s it. All that, with sale prices and discounts, came out to over $100.
*sigh*
On another note, our pantry just got a boost for canned soups and a few more cans of beans. With my mother still in the hospital and not going back to her apartment, I’m going to start clearing some things out, little by little. My brother and SIL had picked up a lot of canned soup and such for her, as it was a lot easier for her and something the home care staff could prepare for her. After talking to them about it, they told me to take them, since we have “more mouths to feed”. 😄 I certainly won’t say no to things to add to our pantry!
While shopping today, I saw the canned beans we used to get regularly were on sale as 2/$3 A sale price of $1.50 per can, that used to cost 97¢ a can, regular price, not that long ago.
What isn’t pictured is my stop at the pharmacy. I got ibuprofen for the girls. Two smaller bottles that were on sale, making them cheaper than getting one larger bottle. I got acetaminophen for myself, which is safe to take with my anti-inflammatories. I still have some prescription painkillers left, but I don’t want to be using those if I don’t have to. I also got a tube of Voltaren for myself, that was on sale, and lactaid for my husband, which was not on sale. That all came out to something like $98.
I did stop at the hardware store before going to visit my mother, trying to find some Roof Melt. Turns out, they don’t even carry it, though the website made it look like they did. The city stores carry it, not the small towns. The first staff I asked about it didn’t even know what it was. I ended up talking to a manager? I think? who has helped me before. They tried really hard to find something for me. One of the other staff came by and heard what I was asking for, and got all excited, because it’s a product she would be getting, too! In the end, the manager said he was going to try and order something in, but he wasn’t sure if it would work.
He did mention that you can get beet juice granules. Somewhere. He didn’t know. This would be sprinkled on the roof and in the eavestroughs in the fall, where they would keep things clear all winter, and are completely safe for the grass and water table the melt water would drain to.
The Re-Farmer 