The day feels way longer than it should have.
Today was set aside for me to go to my mother’s to do her shopping and errands and household stuff. I’ll start off by saying, she was actually on really good behaviour today, comparatively speaking. Things did go well.
The morning started off with the feeding of yard cats and doing my morning rounds. I tried for a head count this morning, and got 30. Last time, it was 35, including a cat I didn’t recognize. I haven’t seen it, since.
As I was heading in, I found this little crowd.
I moved both heat lamps lower, but this one is a 150watt ceramic heat bulb. The other is 200watt. I thought it was 250w, forgetting that I wasn’t able to find the ceramic heat bulbs at 250w. The lamp is rated to 250w, and there’s an incandescent 250w heat bulb in a matching lamp in the isolation shelter.
Speaking of which, that’s going to be used for its original purpose soon!
This morning, I got a message from the rescue. We have two dates to spay two cats each. I was sent a screen cap of a texted confirmation with two dates, one of which was for 3 cats. I was told I had two slots and someone else had the third, so I thought that was my date. I didn’t think the earlier date was also for me until I got a call while I was at my mother’s from the vet clinic to confirm the earlier date! It is straightened out now, though I did tell the woman who called me that, while we have two females we know we can catch for the first one, with the second one, we might have to just catch what we can, and see what they turn out to be! This isn’t very uncommon when it comes to strays and colony cats. I’ve brought in cats without even knowing for sure what gender they were, and they were fine with it.
But that got worked out much later.
I was able to head out a bit early to my mother’s bringing along my stock pot and a good knife, along with the prepped vegetables and herds, for the chicken stock was would be making for her. When I got there, my mother was back in bed, after her morning med assist. I noticed she had a garbage bag ready for the bin by the door, so I quickly dropped the stuff off, grabbed the garbage and headed out. Which turned out to be excellent timing. I passed one of her neighbours in the hall; someone who’s window faces the street. We ended up chatting for a while, and he told me he seeds me out his window quite often. He was very sweet. He mentioned that my mother clearly needs more help, and that he’d told her, if she ever needs anything, to just knock on his door.
When I got back, I told my mother about this, but she had no memory of him saying this to her! When I told her which apartment he was in, she even struggled to remember who lived there. She would recognize him to see him, but not necessarily connect him to any particular apartment.
It’s good to know she has some good neighbours.
When I got back to my mother’s, she was up and at her table. She joked about her being wrapped in a robe and wearing a regular shirt, because it’s been so long since her laundry was done, she ran out of nightgowns!
She was rather amused when I started unpacking my supplies and pre-prepared ingredients to work on her chicken stock. I just had to prep the chicken legs and thighs. My mother insisted I wash the pieces really, really well, to wash off the “chemicals”, then started telling me how the stores all spray meat with chemicals to make meat last longer. I told her that’s not quite what they do, and she got instant angry with me – but I was still washing her chicken for her, so she turned off the angry. I’m not sure if she was thinking of the CO that’s used to keep beef red in packaging, or she she was thinking of the chlorine rinse they used to do, to kill off bacteria like salmonella, though that hasn’t been done in years. No doubt, it was something she saw on daytime TV or read in a paper, many, many years ago.
After the chicken was in the pot, I started adding the mirepoix ingredients, then showed her the rest. I don’t think she has ever used ginger before, except maybe in power form. I know she was aware of turmeric, as she had bought a whole bunch for herself because she’d read about how healthy it was, but didn’t know how to use it. She ended up giving it to us! Apple cider vinegar is something she was completely unaware of.
She was oddly surprised by how many garlic cloves I brought – an entire head, so about 6 or 7 cloves. That was probably the last thing I would have expected her to be surprised about. “Polish penicillin” was always a staple ingredient when I was growing up, and she often brings up about how we should plant lots and lots of garlic. I remember how my parents would sometimes eat it. They’d pour some salt onto the table, then dip their cloves of garlic into the salt as they ate it raw!
Once the chicken stock was at the point where I could turn it down to a simmer, I got the first two loads of my mother’s laundry going, then we went over her shopping list. She had added a few things to it since I started it for her a few couple of days ago – including wine! The pharmacy has a liquor section, but the wine she likes isn’t available anymore. In our province, the government controls liquor sales (which is one of the reasons our booze is so expensive; it’s mostly taxes). When Trump started talking tariffs, our premier ordered all US booze to be pulled from the shelves. This was already bought and paid for by the government, of course, and hardly anyone was demanding US booze get pulled. It was just an childish tantrum on the part of our premier. Canada has one Western province where alcohol sales are private. Some places did try to remove US booze from the shelves, but the customers complained so much, they put them back. People in our province have no such say in the matter. The irony of this childish display is that we’ve had tariffs on US products for decades.
Which means the wine my mother usually gets – a super sweet kosher wine my parents bought for as long as I can remember – is no longer available. She asked me to try and find something I thought would be close. 😄
The pharmacy was my first stop and I had to ask one of the staff for help. I don’t know wines. Nothing against them. There just aren’t a lot of alcoholic drinks that I enjoy. In the end, I had two staff members looking things up, trying to find something my mother might like to replace what she normally would have gotten. It came down to just one thing – without US products, their shelves were pretty empty – and there was only one bottle of it left. On sale, too, which was nice.
That done, I picked up a few other things on her list, then got her bubble packs. I got another nice surprise at the checkout. My mother has the loyalty card, which is on her file at the pharmacy. She had lost track of the card for a while, but because it’s on her file, any times she got her prescriptions, she was still collecting points. Only at the store counter does the card need to be shown to collect points.
My mother was able to get $40 off her stuff! Plus, she collected enough new points through her prescription refills that, next time, she’ll be able to get another $20 off. !!!
When I told her that later one, her response was, why didn’t they use that $20 right then?
*sigh*
That done, the next stop was the grocery store for a somewhat larger shop than usual for her. She even requested I picked up some of the deli chicken I would get for her for sandwiches. She didn’t want slices, though. She asked for a chunk about an inch thick. That certainly made it easier for the deli person!
By the time I was done the shopping and back at my mother’s, her Meals on Wheels had arrived and the empty tray was waiting on her walker, outside her door. Those get left in the common room for pick up, on the next delivery day. So I took care of that for her before heading in. I was quite surprised she was done so quickly, and commented on it. I did notice the container with vegetable soup was on the counter, though. Once a week, they do a “use whatcha got” soup using leftovers. My mother says it tastes like dishwater. !!! So that ended up getting tossed. Another moment where she suddenly got angry at me, this time because I couldn’t read her mind over just how she wanted it tossed. *sigh*
Once her things were put away, the rest of the time was spent tending the stock, her laundry and general clean up. I did stop for some tea and a bun as a lunch, before getting back at it. Once the stock was done, I took out the meat to set aside for a bit, then the large sticks of celery and carrots, because I knew my mother would want to include them in a soup or something. I found a little strainer that I used to get most of the big stuff out for the stock before salting it and letting it cook longer, while I deboned the chicken. That all fit into one of the freezer bags that I’d brought along with everything else. The vegetables went into a handy take out container my mother had.
The stock was a different issue. I should have brought jars! I could find only two suitable empty jars and started ladling the stock into them, through the strainer. My mother kept telling me to leave everything out to cool down, first. It took me a bit to understand that she didn’t like the containers being used, and especially when I put the lids loosely on the jars. She thought they would take longer to cool down than if they were just left out. The idea of covering them at least to keep dust out apparently never occurred to her!
I find myself wondering if she was expecting to leave my stock pot behind?
By this point, I was finishing off and starting to pack things up to leave, as soon as her last load of laundry was dry. I had mentioned to my mother earlier that I needed to swing by the garage before going home (she wouldn’t understand what getting a tire torqued means). When she started complaining that I was getting ready to leave, I told her, I still need to go to the garage on the way home.
Which is when she started getting mad at me again. Why was I leaving so soon? I told her, I’d been there for almost 5 hours. Didn’t she finish her Meals on Wheels first? Yes – before I came back with her groceries. She actually tried to claim I’d been there for barely 2 hours, instead of almost 5 hours!
One of the things she wanted me to do was cut her toenails, which I really didn’t want to do on top of everything else. It would have been good for her to soak her feet to soften them, first, too, which hadn’t happened. She basically started having a tantrum. It was as if I hadn’t done anything else for her at all, because her toenails hadn’t been done.
Then she started berating me, asking why I booked to go to the garage on a day I was going to be at her place. I told her, I didn’t; I brought the truck in yesterday. This is a safety thing to make sure my tire doesn’t go flying.
Some time ago, I’d brought over a good set of toenail clippers, because she only had fingernail clippers, and a micro-pedi grinder thing. She told me to take those home, and was angry about it for some reason. I told her, no. She has toenail fungus. If I take them home and use them, I would get her toenail fungus. Only she can use them, now. That made her mad, too.
In the end, I agreed to take a look at her feet. It turned out her nails were really broken up, and only a few had anything to be trimmed. I started using the clippers and she got angry again, demanding I use scissors, because the clippers didn’t work.
They worked find.
I think she may have tried to clip her own toenails and couldn’t manage it, because then she told me one toe had gotten so bad, she grabbed scissors and cut as much as she could, herself.
While I was doing her toes, I pointed out which one had the fungal infection. That lead her to complain about how she spent so much money on medication for it, yet never used it. So I asked her were it was and went looking. At first, the only box I found that was the size I remembered it came in turned out to be eye drops. My mother got angry again, saying she’s never bought eye drops before, so why was it there? She forgot that we did get eye drops for her, when she started getting treated for her macular degeneration.
I finally found the box, hidden way in the back of her cupboard, and applied the medication, but this is not something she can do herself, and it’s not on her care list with home care. I’m not sure if we can even add it to the list or not, partly because I don’t know that my mother would be willing to let them do it.
Ironically, for someone who complains about all the medications she’s taking, she once again brought up about how she thinks she should be using the inhaler – a prescription that was cancelled. I had to explain to her, getting this was a test to see if she had asthma. The alternative would have been to get on a waiting list to get tested, and it could take a year or more before she got to the top of the list. It was simply faster to have her try the prescription to see if it worked or not.
My mother doesn’t understand. She has trouble breathing at night, and she’s gone from complaining about “having” to take it, to now wanting to have it, even though it made no difference at all. Her mind has just latched onto it, now that the prescription has been cancelled. She’d been wanting to stop using it for a long time, too.
Anyhow.
I finally managed to head out, though my mother was still quite angry that I was leaving “so early”. I did manage to get to the garage in good time. I just had to wait until someone was available to do it. Then, since I was there, I popped into the grocery store across the street to pick up some bread, after my daughter told me she hadn’t had a chance to do any baking today.
By the time I left, it was starting to rain! We had reached our high of 10C/50F, too. Happily, I managed to get home before it was getting too dark. That half-light at the end of the day makes it so hard to spot deer getting ready to run across the road.
While things ended on a fairly negative note, I got a lot done at my mother’s. Her fridge is stocked up again, she has her meds, I got her chicken stock made and she has cooked chicken to last her a while.
It just took a really long time, and unfortunately, spending that much time with my mother, even on a good day, is pretty draining.
I am so very tired now.
The Re-Farmer
